Your Awful Dates

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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Your Awful Dates

GORILLA BASTARD: Jun 20, 2005; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Girl I'm with meets some guy she knows & basically ignores me for 30 minutes, so I call a cab & I'm home sipping on Patron with Rick & Morty for 40 minutes before I get the phone call.

ISABELLA: "Your home?"
GB: "Yep, how's your date going?"
ISABELLA: "blah blah blah you don't understand"
GB: "....uh-huh"

Next day she calls to invite me over, she's wearing a little black dress & serves me fresh carrot cake. She says I can do whatever I want to her.
GB: "Anal it is then"

I proceed to gently caress her in the rear end for 20 minutes before just passes out after orgasm. After making sure she still breathing, I get up & wipe my cock on her window treatment & leave.

I hate carrot cake.

# ¿ May 27, 2017 19:24

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 14:41

GORILLA BASTARD: Jun 20, 2005; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Fartbox posted:

When did loving girls in the rear end become such a prized thing

butts are where poops come from

Look at this child.

# ¿ May 27, 2017 21:27

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Your Awful Dates