MAY 2017 CHAT THREAD - All my freinds are getting married

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > MAY 2017 CHAT THREAD - All my freinds are getting married

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

CornHolio posted:

So a buddy of mine is looking at a 1999 Range Rover.

I told him to never buy a $2500 Range Rover, but other than that advice, what should he be looking for if he goes to check this out and how bad of a vehicle will it be for him?

I also saw a $2500 1999 Range Rover with a broken engine recently. Here's what I wrote about it.

my hands, incapable of being stopped posted:

You are at a posh private school, angry because the nanny had some kind of family emergency and couldn�t drop off Zjaden this morning. That�s when you feel it, on some level beyond the physical.

When you look up from your smartphone, the normally-taciturn sun visors of your Audi SQ5 start flapping. The dashboard flashes a series of increasingly dire warnings, finally settling on �BIOHAZARD DEFENSE ACTIVATED.�

You feel as if you are now constantly in a car crash, but you are still parked. Barely a breath later, the exterior glass explodes under the strain, showering you in glimmering cubes. With the interior of the Audi now open to the air, that�s when you hear it.

TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

The sky is growing dark in what is left of the rear-view mirror. Is it a tornado? Are you caught in a terrorist attack?

It has not stopped. In fact, it grows closer. TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Children are crying on the sidewalk, including Zjaden, who has collapsed face-first onto the pavement, blood streaming from his ears and eyes. You know in your heart this is Judgment Day.

Finally, a rusty 1999 Range Rover Classic bursts into view, a cloud of impenetrable ash in the shape of a human skull trailing it. The front end is gone, mangled back to the bare suspension supports which are welded directly to the valve covers of the immense green engine that is its screaming heart.

As it passes you, the rear air suspension of the Rover explodes, showering the battered side of your carbonized Audi with shrapnel of only the finest British manufacture. Somehow you remain conscious, but you know it is too late for your son. The last thing you see before the cloud overtakes you is the words �STRANGE ROVER� punched into the remaining intact metal of the truck�s tailgate.

That night, you return to your $1.3 million McMansion atop Posh Hill and declare your intention to leave your husband. Coming this close to death has changed you, but you can�t admit it to yourself or to him that you were living a lie all this time. He refuses, your contract of mutual support inviolable. The argument becomes heated. A revolver is withdrawn from your purse. Two shots, centre mass.

As you walk to the desiccated husk of your Audi, dripping liquid diesel from its panels into the storm sewer, you take your time. It is a certainty that the police will never arrive. They are too busy following a luxury SUV after getting pollution and noise complaints from the railroad and airport.

# ¿ May 4, 2017 17:01

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 9, 2024 18:40

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Somewhat Heroic posted:

Tobias Funke is one of the best characters ever. How and why did David Cross take those drat awful Chipmunk movie roles?

Cross has spoken about it before, it basically boiled down to "it paid a lot of money." At the very least it seems like he puts in a good day's effort for it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1pNO9OM2MA

One day I hope to have a defensive interview with ABC News on a golf course with a beer in hand.

Seat Safety Switch fucked around with this message at 17:44 on May 4, 2017

# ¿ May 4, 2017 17:42

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Talk him down to $250, then teach yourself to hotwire a car.

And replace an entire wiring harness, by which I mean the starter wire. Maybe the brake light wires if you're feeling punchy or you live somewhere with inspections. Sell the wire you don't need to a scrappy for copper value.

For engine management, JB weld a swap-meet weber on the intake manifold after tin-snipping a hole in the hood to clear it. Sell everything in the interior, strip the door cards, permanently jam the windows in the upright position, sell the entire power window apparatus on eBay to afford the car.

Drift stitch all the old-man body damage, or better yet just remove the bumpers and sell those on eBay/to a recycler as cores.

Seat Safety Switch fucked around with this message at 00:52 on May 7, 2017

# ¿ May 7, 2017 00:47

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Darchangel posted:

OK, I think I'm getting the vibe that there may be better options out there.
This is why I love you guys.

I think you should do it.

Do exactly what I said. Post it on a Mercedes forum. Watch a bunch of 17-year-olds who refer to everyone as "cuzin" get immensely angry at you.

I don't have a good solution for how to do spark on the cheap, but maybe there's a trigger wheel that fits that you can jam into a Speeduino. But then more wires!

Seat Safety Switch fucked around with this message at 05:56 on May 7, 2017

# ¿ May 7, 2017 05:52

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Safety Dance posted:

In between meetings, phone interviews, and scheduling movers, I don't think I'm going to have a free minute to do any actual work today.

I mostly just help the juniors these days.

# ¿ May 9, 2017 19:33

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Gingerbread House Music posted:

i'm paid to fidn the loving FIVE WAY DELPHI CONNECTOR BURIED UNDER AN UNREMOVABLE SUSPENSION SEAT ON A loving CUB CADET PRO Z100, REEEE

You rang?

# ¿ May 11, 2017 23:30

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Gingerbread House Music posted:

Putting a $1500 leaf vac on a $7500 mower is an overly complicated thing. I'm going to blame you, ok?

Hey, get off me and then the tractor will stall.

# ¿ May 12, 2017 00:04

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Gingerbread House Music posted:

Um, not if the controls are in the outboard position and i have the parking brake on.

You have a Cub Cadet with a functioning parking brake? I'm more impressed by that than any other mechanical expertise you could name.

# ¿ May 12, 2017 00:08

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Rhyno posted:

So uh, anybody want to do that AI Rally?

You've got a few weeks, you can probably make it here by then.

# ¿ May 14, 2017 16:34

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Rhyno posted:

FREE T CRUISER

Come rally with us. If you get started now you'll have plenty of time.

# ¿ May 16, 2017 01:49

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Nice job dude.

# ¿ May 18, 2017 03:14

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Cellular Suicide posted:

It's true, and I agree that React is better than Angular, it just sends me through the roof when people choose a framework solely due to buzz and/or love for the maintainer(s). Those seem to be the two primary criteria when people put together a set of front end tools.

Elm, motherfuckers.

# ¿ May 19, 2017 03:43

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Rhyno posted:

Hahahaha HOLY poo poo

I just started a dialogue with a dude in a local car club, he needs a 4 door car as he is suddenly saddled with being a single dad to two kids. And he has a non running 96 Miata up for trade. So I should absolutely swap the PT for that car right? And then LS Swap the motor?

If it's non running it could be something as simple as a hosed CAS or broken timing belt.

# ¿ May 19, 2017 15:14

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Nice. I wish my house were hard-wired with ethernet. I should do it (the upstairs is a mess with a bunch of old computers) but I really don't want to be going through walls and poo poo.

# ¿ May 20, 2017 23:23

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 9, 2024 18:40

Seat Safety Switch: May 27, 2008; MY RELIGION IS THE SMALL BLOCK V8 AND COMMANDMENTS ONE THROUGH TEN ARE NEVER LIFT.; Pillbug

Enourmo posted:

Well as a follow up to my little grades meltdown, it turns out that the classes I got Ds in will be good enough for me to graduate, so provided I do well in Vibrations this semester I can still graduate next spring. Registered for my senior design course already.

Ds get degrees, motherfucker.

# ¿ May 25, 2017 15:43

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > MAY 2017 CHAT THREAD - All my freinds are getting married