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BloodBag
Sep 20, 2008

WITNESS ME!



drat, new thread's off to a wonderful start. That's some of the stupidest poo poo I've ever heard.

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Hoodwinker
Nov 7, 2005

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

She just kept repeating to the HR and Pension people: "I want my money now. I don't want you to hold on to it forever. I understand that I will get much more, but that is in 20+ years and we will have better jobs and a house almost paid off by then, so we don't need the hassle of keeping the state updated with our address and holding onto our money for 20+ years. It will be more useful now and I just don't want to have it hanging over my head for so many years."
"I don't want to do a combined several hours worth of work over 20 years to earn an order of magnitude more money." Even worse, I guarantee she doesn't realize that "better jobs" won't in fact be as much better as they seem on the surface because of inflation. I would absolutely bet 8 grand against getting much more in 20 years for a barely non-zero amount of work.

Jake Mustache
Feb 7, 2017
I wonder if her new husband knew about the pension and what she was doing.

Scudworth
Jan 1, 2005

When life gives you lemons, you clone those lemons, and make super lemons.

Dinosaur Gum
I hate having large amounts of money hanging over my head, floating there, waiting to just rain down.

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009

Holy crap Reddit.

https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/68y3vz/is_there_a_way_i_can_keep_my_mothers_house/

quote:

Is there a way I can keep my mother's house?

tl;dr: Father got arrested for possession of child pornography. Complete surprise to everyone. My mother is a stay at home mother and has been for 33 years that they have been married. I work but don't make any real money. Any financial suggestions would be appreciated. Probably makes more sense reading it all.

...My mother has been a stay at home mom since my father got his job 30 years ago. He made good money where we didn't have to worry. I'm a minimalist in a way. When I graduated college I realized my time and family is more valuable to me than getting a "real" job that pays six figures. We never hurt for money my dad made plenty and it was always a fair trade on my labor vs. The building supplies for my house....

...All in all I am self sufficient. I remodel for 6 hours everyday and take care of my family for the rest. ...


quote:

I do have income, it just comes from my family's income which isn't physically there right now. I work for my parents I just don't get handed money and they pay my bills and I get my house, it's a fair trade. My sister will have a lot of money later just none to give me now. I get paid 16 dollars an hour, I have it all added up to how much she owes me. But that IOU does no good for me right now.

LLCoolJD
Dec 8, 2007

Musk threatens the inorganic promotion of left-wing ideology that had been taking place on the platform

Block me for being an unironic DeSantis fan, too!

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

We had somebody quit today because they were moving in a couple of months with their husband.

Why did they quit now instead of in a couple months when they move?

Because they have been here for 9 years and 10 months. You become vested in the pension plan at 10 years (50% of your average salary for your 3 highest earning years of service until death, starting at age 62 unless you do at least 20 years) and if you quit before you become vested you get your pension contributions back with no interest.

She took a payout of about $8,000 instead of the pension and even had the HR Office and Pension Office repeatedly try to tell her not to quit just for this reason.

If she lives to be 80, then she got that 8k in exchange for 270k over 18 years.

I disagree with her decision, but I must point out that it's almost certain that the pension plan does not mean you get a full 50% benefit for a mere ten years of service. If it's anything like other plans, she would get a fraction of the 50%, and perhaps even that would be reduced further due to not working the full 30 years or so.

"Vested" just means that you get the benefit of the pension plan. It doesn't mean "full pension benefits have been earned." If ten years meant a 50% pension down the line, every Tom, Dick, and Harry would go somewhere else after ten years. If your plan gives full benefits after ten years, let me know so I can sign up.

e.g. Suppose I am vested in a government pension with ten years of service. I get 10 × 1.7% of my best 3-year average, or 17%. Since I don't have 30 years (full term of service), I get only 70% of that 17%, which is roughly 12%. If I were on $30k/year, that would be $3,600/year once I hit retirement age. Still a dumb thing to give up, I agree, but it's not $15k/year.

I admit I don't know the terms of your pension. I'm not saying it's impossible. Just that I would be floored if the pension scheme were actually structured in that generous manner.

LLCoolJD fucked around with this message at 16:22 on May 3, 2017

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat

Grimey Drawer

This is so odd. He's got six years of IOU's for work performed, 6 hours a day at $16/hour...so like $150k if we're not thinking about taxes (and we're not). So he apparently gets a house for all this, but he doesn't have the house yet and now it looks like they'll probably lose the house. His family's all like, "sorry" and he hasn't quiet figured out what that means yet.

I don't think the family's mental illness stops at his father's attraction to children.

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster

LLCoolJD posted:

I disagree with her decision, but I must point out that it's almost certain that the pension plan does not mean you get a full 50% benefit for a mere ten years of service. If it's anything like other plans, she would get a fraction of the 50%, and perhaps even that would be reduced further due to not working the full 30 years or so.

"Vested" just means that you get the benefit of the pension plan. It doesn't mean "full pension benefits have been earned." If ten years meant a 50% pension down the line, every Tom, Dick, and Harry would go somewhere else after ten years. If your plan gives full benefits after ten years, let me know so I can sign up.

e.g. Suppose I am vested in a government pension with ten years of service. I get 10 × 1.7% of my best 3-year average, or 17%. Since I don't have 30 years (full term of service), I get only 70% of that 17%, which is roughly 12%. If I were on $30k/year, that would be $3,600/year once I hit retirement age. Still a dumb thing to give up, I agree, but it's not $15k/year.

I admit I don't know the terms of your pension. I'm not saying it's impossible. Just that I would be floored if the pension scheme were actually structured in that generous manner.

Under the old plan, you are vested after 10 years and get full benefits after 15 (if you're older than 60) or 20. They did away with that plan, but she was grandfathered in. The new plan is much less generous, but still pretty good.

I just calculated her plan to check and she would have gotten about $9,100 per year starting at age 62.

Jake Mustache posted:

I wonder if her new husband knew about the pension and what she was doing.

She's been married to the same guy and I have no clue if he knew or not.

Leon Trotsky 2012 fucked around with this message at 16:42 on May 3, 2017

Fitzy Fitz
May 14, 2005





There is too much here.

OP's excuses for not getting a job.

His mother is a shut-in.

His sisters living with their grandfather in a 5000 sq ft house.

"All in all I am self-sufficient" from the guy who lives with his parents and has no job.

OP's father ruins the entire family's livelihood by looking at child porn. OP says in a reply "You can always rely on family. I'm sorry but you can." And also "he's a great man and best father I could ever have gotten."

"All of this is not really my problem. I could move out today and take care of myself just fine." He ponders getting a job at Lowe's or Home Depot despite having two college degrees.

Inept
Jul 8, 2003

quote:

tl;dr: Father got arrested for possession of child pornography. Complete surprise to everyone.

quote:

You can always rely on family. I'm sorry but you can. I'd give anything to help my parents and siblings and they would do the same for me. That is what family is about.

This guy is in denial about absolutely everything.

Twerk from Home
Jan 17, 2009

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.

This is a mental health nightmare. His poor shut-in mother needs to be seeing mental health professionals, and he needs to go get a construction job not for his family if he's been doing construction work 30+ hours a week for 5 years.

The guy really sums it up himself!

quote:

Everyone has different goals in life, having money is definitely not one of mine.
...
I work for friends sometimes like flooring, painting, etc. But I'm not a licensed contractor so I don't believe I can do remodeling work for others. I've been 100% busy with what my family has had to get done and always figured if I wanted to make a career out of it I'd get licensed later.

He also talks about how $200/mo is enough for him to live on because his meals cost less than $5/day, and his healthcare plan is having his sister give him stitches or prescribe antibiotics.

Twerk from Home fucked around with this message at 16:47 on May 3, 2017

LLCoolJD
Dec 8, 2007

Musk threatens the inorganic promotion of left-wing ideology that had been taking place on the platform

Block me for being an unironic DeSantis fan, too!

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

Under the old plan, you are vested after 10 years and get full benefits after 15 (if you're older than 60) or 20. They did away with that plan, but she was grandfathered in. The new plan is much less generous, but still pretty good.

I just calculated her plan to check and she would have gotten about $9,100 per year starting at age 62.

Holy poo poo that's a drat good plan.

Hoodwinker
Nov 7, 2005

"I'm a fully self-sufficient person with the unfettered support of my equally insane family."

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster

LLCoolJD posted:

Holy poo poo that's a drat good plan.

I know. :( She is never going to have another chance like this because it is literally gone.

The new one is still very good, but nowhere near as generous.

Mandatory contributions are 5% of salary instead of 3%
Vested after 10-years, but at 25% the benefit. 20 years for "full benefit" but you lose .4% for each month under 30 years you have unless you are over 60. 30-years for full benefit with no penalty.
Max benefit is 46.5% of salary instead of 50%.

They were trying to go over every angle: lower taxes on payments in retirement, that updating your address is not a big deal, the actual amounts of money, etc.

She still took the 8k.

Also, a tiny BWM issue in comparison, but if she had stayed the extra 2 months she could have cashed out her remaining sick and vacation days at a higher rate and probably gotten an extra 2k or so if she was capped or near capped. No idea what she had and I can't find out.

Our pension office rep was almost literally begging her to take the money.

Leon Trotsky 2012 fucked around with this message at 17:06 on May 3, 2017

Fitzy Fitz
May 14, 2005




Picture of Redditor's family:

EAT FASTER!!!!!!
Sep 21, 2002

Legendary.


:hampants::hampants::hampants:

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

Under the old plan, you are vested after 10 years and get full benefits after 15 (if you're older than 60) or 20. They did away with that plan, but she was grandfathered in. The new plan is much less generous, but still pretty good.

I just calculated her plan to check and she would have gotten about $9,100 per year starting at age 62.


She's been married to the same guy and I have no clue if he knew or not.

The present value of a $9,100 perpetuity beginning in 30 years assuming a discount rate of 3% in 2016 dollars is $125,000. :shepspends:

crazypeltast52
May 5, 2010



EAT FASTER!!!!!! posted:

The present value of a $9,100 perpetuity beginning in 30 years assuming a discount rate of 3% in 2016 dollars is $125,000. :shepspends:

It does eventually end with her death, so it isn't a true perpetuity, although at the number of expected payments we probably aren't too far off.

Hoodwinker
Nov 7, 2005

Fitzy Fitz posted:

Picture of Redditor's family:


Is that from that one incredibly dark and gruesome X-Files episode? Because you could also substitute anything from that.

Tiny Brontosaurus
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax

Fitzy Fitz posted:

There is too much here.

OP's excuses for not getting a job.

His mother is a shut-in.

His sisters living with their grandfather in a 5000 sq ft house.

"All in all I am self-sufficient" from the guy who lives with his parents and has no job.

OP's father ruins the entire family's livelihood by looking at child porn. OP says in a reply "You can always rely on family. I'm sorry but you can." And also "he's a great man and best father I could ever have gotten."

"All of this is not really my problem. I could move out today and take care of myself just fine." He ponders getting a job at Lowe's or Home Depot despite having two college degrees.

Everything about this screams fundie quiverfull family to me, like the Duggars. Does he say what he got his degrees in? It might be, like, Bible Technology, and be pretty unemployable.

BigDave
Jul 14, 2009

Taste the High Country

Hoodwinker posted:

Is that from that one incredibly dark and gruesome X-Files episode? Because you could also substitute anything from that.

Yup, 'Home'.

Tiny Brontosaurus
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax
You can always rely on family:
My father stole my identity, now I owe 9k in taxes

a guy who is extremely hosed posted:

Hi, as the title says, my father used my identity to generate a revenue of $29,000 by the end of 2013 selling on eBay. I did not report this when I filed taxes the following year as I was unaware. This year, the refund I was expecting was applied to "a past due tax obligation" -- the amount I ought to have paid in taxes for 2013. Even after the refund has been applied, I am being told by the IRS that I still owe $9,000. Two days ago, I received from the IRS via certified mail a "Notice of Intent to seize (levy) your property or rights to property." I do not have property, but I believe this also translates to wage garnishment and possibly freezing my bank accounts.

My mother insists on getting this resolved for me as she and my father have incurred this debt. She has a box of receipts from sales in 2013 that should essentially show that zero profit was made. When she consulted her tax guy, he said they could amend my 2014 tax filing. She forwarded me a power of attorney to sign so that he could discuss/handle the matter with the IRS on my behalf. It has been about 1.5-2 months since then and I still have no idea whether or how this matter is going to get resolved. The last time she and her tax guy spoke, he advised that I send senator Marco Rubio's office (I am in Florida) a letter asking that they get the debt forgiven. Is this even possible? That action was taken and I haven't heard back from his office.

I am not sure what to do at this point and am seeking some advice on steps I need to take. Frankly, my mother acting as a middleman between me and this tax guy I've never met who doesn't seem to get results is making me extremely uncomfortable. With the threat of having my property seized, I believe action must be taken right now. I do not want to take legal action against my parents so what should I do?

BigDave
Jul 14, 2009

Taste the High Country
I cosigned for my deadbeat stepson, how can I get out of it?

quote:

While I was married, my ex-wife convinced me to co-sign a student loan for her son (my step-son). We're now divorced and the step-son doesn't always make his payments on time. The payments are $280/mo
I checked with the bank who has the loan, and he needs 2 years of full, on-time payments for me to be removed. So far, he's been unable to achieve that. He gets close (12-18 months) and then misses a payment. In fact, today, I just got a letter saying it's 30 days past due.

What's you're advice for extracting myself out of this?

My former employer is trying to commit payroll fraud.

quote:

I was working as an optician for this particular Dr's. Optometry practice. She did not have me sign any paperwork when I started. I recently quit to go to a better job opportunity for myself. Unfortunately, I didn't give her a two week notice because my new boss wanted me to start asap. I felt bad for the circumstances, but I did what I felt was best for me. I don't owe her any property back or anything like that. I just want to be able to go in on a Monday when I have the day off to get my check, but she is making it difficult for me by saying I can only go get it when she is there and when I sign a paper in her presence only. Financially, I cannot be leaving work early to go do this. So it's just frustrating that she can't just compromise a bit with me. It feels like she is just upset still.

Shame Boy
Mar 2, 2010


I'm the assumption that all real jobs pay six figures if you just try

Zamujasa
Oct 27, 2010



Bread Liar

GWM is apparently having kids and then using them for identity theft, given how many absolutely refuse to actually do anything about it. And holy poo poo, signing over power of attorney to the very people who already abused your identity :stare:



As for forums BWM, you don't even need to provide a fraudulent gift card for the scam now.

Hoodwinker
Nov 7, 2005

I feel like we need some sort of mandatory government-sponsored training for everybody when they get out of school for how to deal with loving finances, contracts, and being a productive member of society.

Ashcans
Jan 2, 2006

Let's do the space-time warp again!

Really you should just make it part of regular schooling; by the time a lot of people leave school they are 18 or older and might already have gotten screwed on something. Ideally you want this to be in high school so people have a chance to understand the impacts of the choices they get to make at 18 a little better.

Ixian
Oct 9, 2001

Many machines on Ix....new machines
Pillbug

LLCoolJD posted:

Holy poo poo that's a drat good plan.

No kidding. You don't see that anymore in the US. I am surprised it lasted long enough for her to be grandfathered in.

If you have a 30k/year job and you get a plan like that I hope to hell whatever her spouse is doing is orders of magnitude better. Otherwise in that situation I'd ride that pony in to the ground.

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat

Grimey Drawer

Zamujasa posted:

GWM is apparently having kids and then using them for identity theft, given how many absolutely refuse to actually do anything about it. And holy poo poo, signing over power of attorney to the very people who already abused your identity :stare:



As for forums BWM, you don't even need to provide a fraudulent gift card for the scam now.

I enjoyed the tax attorney suggesting he contact his BWM Senator to have a debt forgiven, even though according to his mother there was no profit and everything will be fine when they refile his taxes. Which of course ignores the fact it's still a fraudulent return since his identity was stolen.

If he had the gumption, he could probably sic the IRS on both his parents and the attorney.

Nail Rat
Dec 29, 2000

You maniacs! You blew it up! God damn you! God damn you all to hell!!

Hoodwinker posted:

I feel like we need some sort of mandatory government-sponsored training for everybody when they get out of school for how to deal with loving finances, contracts, and being a productive member of society.

This is not in the interest of the upper classes though, so it won't happen.

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster
They used to have Home Economics that included things like balancing a checkbook and whatnot.

It was not especially useful because 16-year olds didn't pay attention and the ones that did forgot by the time they were required to do it 3 or 4 years later.

BonerGhost
Mar 9, 2007

Krispy Kareem posted:

I enjoyed the tax attorney suggesting he contact his BWM Senator to have a debt forgiven, even though according to his mother there was no profit and everything will be fine when they refile his taxes. Which of course ignores the fact it's still a fraudulent return since his identity was stolen.

If he had the gumption, he could probably sic the IRS on both his parents and the attorney.

"The attorney" suggested

Because the attorney definitely really exists and isn't just his mother digging deeper into this con?

Tiny Brontosaurus
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

They used to have Home Economics that included things like balancing a checkbook and whatnot.

It was not especially useful because 16-year olds didn't pay attention and the ones that did forgot by the time they were required to do it 3 or 4 years later.

Yeah it should be a mandatory class your final semester of senior year, and they should do a refresher workshop all four years in college. Credit card companies would riot though.

Henrik Zetterberg
Dec 7, 2007

silicone thrills posted:

Do we know the same guy? A guy at my office has been jerking off to AMD for the past year and keeps swinging buy to chat with the dude in the cube next to me about how his AMD stock is gonna finally pay off. Also his watercooled rig. It's kind of to be expected out of desktop techs but also retarded when you work for a non profit with a really stupidly good 401k that he could increase his contribution to.

I think we all know the same guy, except my guy is the bitcoin guy. Like your guy, he's been all over AMD's nuts for the past year. I lol'ed at him yesterday for AMD's tumble, and this was his response:

quote:

lol all those haters
omg they did not have a perfect quarter even tho they posted 18.7 percent gains
not to mention the server chips are not even out yet

I have flipped my profit from amd into apple then flipped that into nvidia
my 180 bucks is now at 430 even with the price drop
was at 500

i would say i am doing okay

I don't even :psyduck:

Naturally, he has no retirement accounts, but a sick new watercooled rig, complete with LEDs. And wants to buy a $60k diesel truck.

Henrik Zetterberg fucked around with this message at 20:23 on May 3, 2017

Cold on a Cob
Feb 6, 2006

i've seen so much, i'm going blind
and i'm brain dead virtually

College Slice

Ashcans posted:

Really you should just make it part of regular schooling; by the time a lot of people leave school they are 18 or older and might already have gotten screwed on something. Ideally you want this to be in high school so people have a chance to understand the impacts of the choices they get to make at 18 a little better.

We do this in Canada. In most provinces, it's either an explicit class or a specific topic for inclusion in regular classes: http://business.financialpost.com/personal-finance/young-money/how-canadians-are-taught-financial-literacy-from-coast-to-coast

We're doing a poo poo job of of it though:


(We have a whole discussion thread about the Canadian housing bubble if you want to read and discuss more!)

monster on a stick
Apr 29, 2013

Tiny Brontosaurus posted:

Yeah it should be a mandatory class your final semester of senior year, and they should do a refresher workshop all four years in college. Credit card companies would riot though.

Our class was optional but it was a pretty full-fledged personal finance class, we even talked about how stocks worked.

Hoodwinker
Nov 7, 2005

We had something like that in high school too. High school kids don't have context to associate their actions with the real life consequences, because high school is more like Lord of the Flies than real life. It would have to be given after finishing schooling and at the start of whenever somebody has real responsibilities to deal with.

Nail Rat posted:

This is not in the interest of the upper classes though, so it won't happen.
Whether you're joking or not, the abundance of BWM material shows that the bourgeois doesn't have to lift a loving finger to enable this kind of behavior. Our own natural biases do most of the heavy lifting. Bring on the singularity!

Edit:

*In the post-Singularity universe, translated from binary*
"I can't believe this guy spent 15 extra cycles recomputing his coefficient. What a loving waste. Anyway, does anybody else have to deal with klybar crystal efficiency not offering up the advertised rates?"

"Desire is an illusion."

"Yeah, but I spent like 34k credits on them."

Hoodwinker fucked around with this message at 20:59 on May 3, 2017

pig slut lisa
Mar 5, 2012

irl is good


ehhh nm

monster on a stick
Apr 29, 2013

I liked the story :colbert:

EDIT:

https://np.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/68dp0w/is_this_illegal/ posted:

So recently I was hired to process payroll for an employer but via telecommute and money orders. 1) Is this legal if the payment is in form of a payroll check from the client for me to cash and distribute to employees. 2) If the payroll check processes through my bank and is cleared am I responsible for those funds after the bank has verified the funds to me as available if a month down the road the payroll check is contested by issuer for whatever reason. If one of you legal eagles could answer this question I would be grateful.

So everyone says it's a well-known scam, but then OP says:

quote:

I could totally see how this would be seen as a scam but the legality is what I was asking. I use to work for a roofing company years ago and my boss would write me a check from the business account to pay employees on the crew.

But it is an ILLEGAL scam? :smug:

monster on a stick fucked around with this message at 21:16 on May 3, 2017

Hot Dog Day #91
Jun 19, 2003

Regarding pension chat:

I work for a State government that also us a good pension. You can get up to 70% salary for your average last 5 years, plus insurance. The longer work the better the pension.

My co-worker has been working there about 5 years longer than me. Just before he vests at 10 years, he takes w job private side for a raise of about 15k. That's a good raise, right? Except he has 0 retirement, personal, or other savings but this pension. No 401k. Oh, but he does have a lot of credit card debt and has defaulted in his 200k in private student loans. He was dead set on seeing more money, but he's 40. He'll likely never pay the loans unless consolidates or settles.

We talked to him about the pension, and how he'll never be able to stop working in his life. Sure at 65 he'll get something, but it won't be enough to try and retire. I hope he does really well in the private sector.

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BarbarianElephant
Feb 12, 2015
The fairy of forgiveness has removed your red text.

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

They used to have Home Economics that included things like balancing a checkbook and whatnot.

My mum responsibly taught me to balance a checkbook, but I've never actually used this skill because, uh, it's pretty useless since I can check my account balance on my phone.

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