- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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quote:I drive a car that was financed by my mom, with me consigning. Recently, her car (fully paid off) finally gave out on her. She does not want to put any more money into that car. Instead, she wants to refinance the car that I drive, without me consigning, and keep it for herself. This would free up my credit, so that I can finance another car for myself. We both have below average credit. The car is $9,000+ upside down.
We currently only have one car, and desperately need a 2nd. Can we refinance? What are our options?
https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/68v8go/upside_down_auto_refinance/
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May 3, 2017 00:56
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May 3, 2024 08:09
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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When people talk about themselves in this thread, it leads exactly to those lovely discussions about whether or not someone's hobby horse is BWM, which was just awful.
Hobby Horses don't seem that bad for money. The vet bills are really low, and it seems like good exercise if you don't mind looking like a total idiot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2IegXZ0NkM
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May 8, 2017 17:42
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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I would love to see a photoshop of a horse tow truck! What would that be like? A big rear end draft horse pulling along a tiny pony???
This with a horse trailer rather than an rv?
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Jun 7, 2017 22:39
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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I'd be okay with this if there were a series of jumps and a water obstacle down the aisle.
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Jun 27, 2017 21:21
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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https://np.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/6n5tug/mn_i_got_scammed_out_of_10000_by_my_now_ex/
quote:
(MN) I got scammed out of $10,000 by my now ex girlfriend. What do I do?
We had been dating for several months and I always paid for everything; she had cash sometimes but not often.
My girlfriend asked a few weeks back if I wanted to partner with her in her business and asked if I wanted to take out a loan of $8,000 so I say yes and do it.
She then went out of state for a business trip (which I now believe is probably a lie) when she said her car broke down and needed help getting a plane ticket. I gave her my credit card (yes, stupid mistake, I know) so she could get the ticket and get a discount through her account. She flies back, asks if she can use it for a few things and I said only if it's an emergency and only if she pays me back. She says it is and she will.
A few days later I get a phone call from my credit card company asking if I made $5,000 in purchases over the course of a few days. I say no and, in my shock over how much was spent, forget to tell them that I had given my girlfriend the card.
She calls me and tells me there's a warrant for her arrest for fraud. I stupidly help her out and pay the fine because I foolishly still at this point think that maybe it wasn't her that did all those charges, and maybe someone stole the number off her phone. She claims I committed fraud in reporting all these charges even though I gave her my card. I don't believe this to be the case because I did tell her it was only for emergencies and that's in a text message.
I got my money back on that $5,000 but I worry that I'm going to be stuck on the hook for an $8,000 loan that I very obviously got scammed into getting. Is there any way I can talk to the bank and tell them what happened and possibly get them to either cancel or lower the amount I owe?
Another thing, we decided to get a phone on my account and she's obviously not going to pay for that. Is there anything I can do with the phone company (T Mobile) that could have them cancel my lease and get out with the least amount of money I owe?
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Jul 14, 2017 19:13
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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I found one! OP buys a predevelopment property at the top of the bubble. Now that the bubble is deflating, he can't sell his current house for what he once expected, and is looking to give up $75,000 in hopes of getting out of his current contract:
https://np.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/72rr7l/overreached_bought_a_home_that_i_cant_afford_is/
quote:Overreached, bought a home that I can't afford .. is there any way to get out of the contract?
Hello r/LegalAdvice,
I made a pretty huge mistake, earlier this year, I bought a house that was above my means as a pre development property in Ontario, Canada.
As the market came tumbling down, I realized that my current home will not sell for what I anticipated, in fact, quite a bit less. As a result, affording the new home will be very difficult.
I have already put $75,000 in deposits into the new house and there's still $35,000 pending. I made the wrong call, got greedy with the housing boom and understand that I made a mistake.
Is there anything that I can do to get out of the contract without being sued? I am okay with forfeiting that deposit in order to get out of the contract.
Thanks,
Some choice responses by the op:
quote: Thanks for the response. So my current house has about $350,000 in equity in it, the new home was for $1.1M and I have $110,000 set aside for the initial payments. That means, I have $990,000 remaining after the deposit.
By selling my current home and pulling $275,000 in equity, I will be left with a $715,000 mortgage left which is essentially double what I am currently paying.
Ideal circumstance would have been to have my current home sell for roughly $900,000 which is where it was when I took the step at the purchasing the new home.
Unfortunately, things just don't go as planned sometimes so the ideal circumstance is to sell the home at a loss that is not too significant.
I can still afford the mortgage but it will be very tight. In the worst case scenario, I will accept the consequences of my actions and close.
However, ideally, I would like to get out of the contract and am willing to forfeit the $75,000 that I have already put in.
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Sep 27, 2017 22:19
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Basically if you want a smaller, more rugged horse we already have those, they are called donkeys and they are very chill and sweet. So just buy one of those and paint some stripes on it if you need to.
AKA a Tijuana Zebra!
Edit: Spelling is hard.
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Oct 19, 2017 23:19
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Happy Halloween! Have a spooky derail bird!
Also, here is some BWM: https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/794hj1/tifu_by_panic_buying_almost_1000_worth_of_concert/
quote:TIFU by panic buying almost £1,000 worth of concert tickets
This did happen today and I am trying not to think about it because thinking about it is making me lightheaded and nauseous.
Today started great. I got up early and went for a run, came home and had a nice breakfast.
My plans for this evening were to enjoy a rare solo night in, with a couple of beers, carving my pumpkin for Halloween and listening to stuff my husband hates but I love so I never get to listen to it.
I don't have to work this weekend; I'm going to a Halloween party on Saturday night and to watch the Wickerman at the cinema on Sunday. A lovely spooky weekend I thought.
Everyone I know is a massive Flight of the Conchords fan so we were all super excited when we heard they were coming to the UK on tour, especially my husband who said he would pay anything to go.
Tickets were due to go on sale this morning but I'd forgotten until I was pulling up outside work that they had gone on sale.
My sister rang me super excited and I started freaking out that we would miss them. I ran to my desk, switched on my PC and waited an agonisingly long time for it to start up.
I finally got it fired up and clicked the link for Leeds Arena - but of course they had already sold out. Gutted. But I was still in panic mode and adrenaline was pumping. I wasn't going to be beaten.
I googled where to get tickets and Stubhub came up. I haven't used it before so I didn't realise it was one of these sites where people buy tickets and then sell them on for hugely ramped up prices.
Stubhub had four tickets on the eighth row for £150 each. Bum clenchingly expensive but my panic addled brain rationalised that if I bought them on my credit card we could pay in instalments and it would definitely be affordable, especially for such great seats.
I selected four tickets and the amount came up - £750. This included £100 in service fees and £20 in tax.
By this point I was maniacally texting everyone asking what they wanted to do. Nobody was coming back to me and the countdown clock was putting me under pressure to buy these amazing seats. gently caress it I thought. I pressed buy.
I texted everyone to let them know what I'd done, thinking they would all agree £180 (including the charges) was A LOT, but * It's affordable if we pay monthly * It's only money * We've been desperate to see them for years * life is for living.
Nope.
Four people who'd previously said they wanted to go flat out refused and said I was mental.
And my husband, who remember had told me he would pay anything to go, rang me shouting 'WTF have you done?'
It turns out "anything" actually means the face value of the tickets.
As the day is wearing on, the reality of what I have done has been slowly sinking in. The only time I have ever spent this much money in one go was on my car and my house.
To top it all off, I paid for the tickets on our joint credit card which we've been trying to pay off for months and months so we can save to move house.
I've relisted them on Stubhub but because of the astronomical fees I have had to hike up the price even more, just to break even. I don't know how this stuff works but I imagine the more time goes by, the less likely I am to be able to sell them.
So now I am stuck with almost a grand's worth of Flight of the Conchord tickets which nobody wants and my chilled out Halloween weekend is ruined because I am having constant intrusive thoughts about what the gently caress am I going to do with these tickets.
TL;DR - I need to chill the gently caress out when trying to buy concert tickets
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Oct 31, 2017 21:42
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Dear Prudence is a goldmine of bad decisions:
http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2017/11/dear_prudence_help_how_do_i_know_if_i_m_bad_at_sex.html
quote:
Q. College: My husband is 20 years older than me and we have a 6-year-old daughter together. My stepchildren are all married and had children at very young ages—the grandchildren are older than my daughter. My relationship with my stepchildren has mostly been civil and respectable as I came into their lives when they were adults. At a recent family gathering, the topic of the cost of college came up and my stepdaughter (mother of five) blithely said she didn’t have to worry because “Daddy would take care of it.” My husband paid for all his children’s college and a few of their graduate schools but doesn’t make nearly as much as he used to. He will be looking at retirement in a few years and most of our income is going to come from me. I am not worried about providing for our daughter—but one girl is not the same as 10 grandchildren.
There are saving bonds for the grandchildren and that is it, at least on our end. I told my stepdaughter that. Things got ugly—she accused me of stealing and hiding the money. When my husband told her, no, he never had plans to pay for college and never told her he would, everything exploded. Many awful things were said and half were directed at me.
It came out that my stepdaughter and one of her brothers never saved a penny for their children’s education and are now panicking. They have said they aren’t coming over for the holidays because of it and posted an ugly accusation on Facebook.
I am terrified they are going to poison the grandchildren against us. My husband is upset, hurt, and disappointed—he is only speaking with two of his children now. The holidays are ruined. Part of me wonders if this is my fault and if it could have been avoided. I told the truth to my stepchildren and it has blown up. Should I do anything? Is there anything I could have done?
I hope she outlives her husband, inherits everything, and then disinherits that stepdaughter.
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Nov 8, 2017 20:59
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Personally, I like the idea of a trust that will match whatever they have in IRAs and 401k when they're 30, and donate the rest to charity.
This type of beyond-the-grave control is almost always a bad idea. It means that if one kid goes to med school, and so is late starting their retirement funds, or if another kid decides to work at a non profit, teaching inner city kids to read, they are penalized for not making enough income to maximize their retirement accounts.
Raise your kids right while you are alive, don’t parent them after you are dead.
Staryberry fucked around with this message at 07:39 on Nov 9, 2017
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Nov 9, 2017 07:33
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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These would be grandparent to grand kid though. The doctor can do alright without the help, the social worker chose to be poor.
But no grandparent wants to provide for their banker grandchild with a large retirement, and not the grandchild who became a doctor or the one struggling to make ends meet to do good in the world. Retirement savings at age 30 is a poor indicator of whether a grandchild “deserves “ an inheritance or would manage it well. If you are really worried about it, give each grandchild enough to give them a step-up in life, but not enough for them to live off of forever. Giving them enough money to pay off student loan debt or a down payment on a house or have a big bump in their retirement savings is unlikely to ruin them forever, and does not penalize perfectly reasonable life choices. Retirement is like any other gift, if you try and control exactly how it is used after you give it, you are probably a jerk. (Exceptions should be made for minors, people with certain special needs, drug problems etc. )
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Nov 9, 2017 17:03
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Go Fund Me: I need to "rescue" this puppy from the pet store by buying it for $1,700. Other people should give me the money!
https://www.gofundme.com/save-the-golden-retriever-puppy
There is a somewhat happy ending. By the time she has the money, someone else has bought the puppy, so she gives the money to the SPCA instead.
Go Fund Me: I want to start my own semi-self sustaining pet store. Give me $5000.
https://www.gofundme.com/starting-my-own-pet-store
I'm not sure if "semi-self sustaining" means that she is going to breed the animals she sells, or if she knows she will be broke again in no time.
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Dec 21, 2017 18:20
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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You guys inspired me to search for "essential oils" on Go Fund Me!
Donate money so I can buy essential oils from myself and donate them to classrooms! Sucks to be the kid with asthma!
https://www.gofundme.com/essentialoilsineveryclassroom
quote:Essential Oils in Every Classroom
I am an independent distributer for Young Living and oil educator. I am also the mother of a two year old and auntie to two twin toddlers and one baby girl. What inspired me to start this campaign was not only my love for essential oils, but my sister who is an elementary school teacher in the Bend/ La Pine school district. I have been able to see all of the positive benefits of essential oils and how they have impacted our day-to-days with children. That is why I am so passionate about getting them into our community.
...
My vision is to get a diffuser and a bundle of essential oils into every elementary classroom in Bend, Oregon. Every child should be able to study in a healthy environment regardless of their personal situation. Afterall, our kids are in school for such a huge portion of the day; let's make it as productive as we can!
I listened to a webinar, and now I really need $1,500 to become a certified essential oil coach!
https://www.gofundme.com/certified-essential-oil-coach
quote: Certified Essential Oil Coach
I just watched a webinar about How To Become A Certified Essential Oil Coach done by Dr. Axe that really piqued my interest. At the end of the webinar it explained how to get certified . I really want to do this because I envision all the ailing people I could help , but I dont have the money to take the online course. So maybe I can get by with a little help from you friend? Thank you !
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Jan 4, 2018 22:40
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Also curious about his mysterious references to beimg "given an unlawful detainer."
Unlawful detainer is what an eviction is called in California. 
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Feb 13, 2018 06:32
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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This. Ditto for tubal ligation, which, in spite of being more invasive and requiring general anesthetic, is actually performed more frequently than vasectomies. I guess a lot of guys are just wusses when it comes to stuff involving their balls.
The rates of tubal ligation are tied to the rate of c-section. If you know you don’t want to be pregnant again, and if they are already going to have you open on the operating table, having your tubes tied isn’t going to increase your recovery time at all. The biggest complaint I’ve heard from women is that they end up needing an emergency c-section, and the dr won’t do the tubal ligation because they are worried that you are just asking to be sterilized due to crazy labor hormones. You have to get it in writing before labor!
Staryberry fucked around with this message at 15:38 on Apr 7, 2018
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Apr 7, 2018 15:09
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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1 in 5 University Students Used Loan Money for Cryptocurrency Investments
http://fortune.com/2018/03/26/students-cryptocurrency-investment/
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Apr 12, 2018 23:08
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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That wouldn't make sense, cause they're not in this to be landlords - their (supposed) intent is to provide their child with a housing opportunity. Which I've already got and can handle well enough, so...
I guess the question is, if they want to help provide a housing opportunity, is this really their best bet? What should they do?
If it was up to me, they'd provide my brother and sister with a place, instead. But they say they're already providing for education, so...
These are really good questions for them to ask an estate planning attorney. It’s hard to tell if this is some sort of way to even out inheritance between multiple kids or if this is some sort of tax avoidance scheme. Either way, they are probably over complicating it a lot. If your parents are cool with it, you can tag along with them, so you don’t get the info second hand.
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Oct 28, 2018 02:26
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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Mormons are huge MLM supporters, as they feel obligated to support each other's bullshit sales pitches and join in with their own.
MLMs are big in a lot of conservative Christian communities. They don’t take women away from their primary responsibilities of raising children and keeping the home. It gives women a sense of being “empowered” while not actually threatening their husband’s supremacy in the household. That’s why so many MLMs have blatantly Christian messages. The founder of Mary Kay preached that you should “take God as your partner” in your business. 31 Gifts is all about giving women the financial freedom to stay home with their children and be a good wife. Amway conferences start with a prayer. There is a whole industry of lesser known MLMs that are overtly Christian.
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Nov 8, 2018 17:35
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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It's been widely written about that a lot of family wealth is squandered by the 3rd generation. First gen makes it somehow, their kids lived through the hard times and learned the work ethic and were evntually left in a privileged position, their kids grew up wanting for nothing, get inheritance and basically set it on fire because they don't understand that money can run out.
The way I learned it, the third generation destroys the family business. The first generation builds the business, the second generation runs the business, the third generation destroys it. By the third generation, they are too used to the wealth, and unlikely to have the grit and interest in running the business. They are more likely to dissolve it, sell it, or run it into the ground. Wealth, on the other hand, can continue for many more generations.
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Nov 9, 2018 04:26
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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quote:Help 21yr M married new car mistake. (Options)
The mistake: So I make about 1600 a month after taxes as does she. Moved in with parents to save money. So that helps but I had two paid off sports cars crashed and only carried liability (car before these blew headgasket). So with all this I was frustrated with used cars and without a car so went to a Ford dealer and got a v6 mustang 2017. About 24500 OTD and 2k down. I believe i owe 21k at 12.9apr. Current payment 460 month
Solution: 1. My credit is mid 700 only reason for apr is wife had no credit. So I can refinance to about 3.4apr at credit union at 72 or 84 months, So about 280-330 monthly payments.
I could also just sell it at a loss and purchase a Colorado 2007 with about 130k miles for 3500. But then I would be upside down on a loan.
Reasons: Well I grew up I guess and wife is making me realize I need to lose the toys. Go to school and actually improve myself instead of living in the moment.
https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/9udflu/help_21yr_m_married_new_car_mistake_options/
I thought about bolding the best parts, but I would just need to bold the whole thing.
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Nov 9, 2018 17:01
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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quote:
My (23/F) boyfriend (30/M) owes me $500.00 and I need it now. He’s saying he doesn’t have it and I’m not sure what do it because I really need the money
Like I said, I sold my boyfriend something that cost me a lot of money because I was going to sell it in general for the money but he really wanted it. I made it clear I could not afford to just give it away. That I NEEDED to sell it. The total was $500.00. Now I haven’t been pressuring him for the money. He’s known he needs to pay me for three months now and hasn’t. He however puts all his money into Bitcoin. And when I asked if he had the $500.00 he said he doesn’t. And I said “withdraw some from bitcoin” and he said “I can’t that’s my long term investment my taxes would be a mess” and I said “Okay then instead of continuing to invest why don’t you pay me?” And he doesn’t seem to be going for that either. I don’t know what to do. Because I NEED the money. At the time I sold it the item was worth more than it is now because it was at a peek. So if he gives it back it’ll sell for much less. Plus I don’t even think he can give it back because he needs the item. He would have to just buy a new one to replace it anyway. Not sure what to do
TL/DR boyfriend owes me $500.00 says he doesn’t have it but has a crap load invested in bitcoin and refuses to withdraw any money
UPDATE: HE BROKE UP WITH ME.
EDIT A PHOTO OF HIS TRUE FORM
NSFW https://geekysextoys.com/product/bitcoin-dildo-btc/ NSFW
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/9x0onb/my_23f_boyfriend_30m_owes_me_50000_and_i_need_it/
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Nov 22, 2018 22:06
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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This is a new twist on "Married to a Man Child"
quote: I (29F) can't talk to my husband (29M) about money, and he's starting to parrot "anti-capitalism" talk at me
We've been married a year, together for over six. I've always made more money than he does, even when we were still in university. I work at a non-profit now so I'm not making much. He's working just under full time, pulling in roughly 1/2 what I make.
Every time I talk to him about savings, or bills, or even changing our mortgage payments, he shuts down. He'll thank me for paying them (they're all in my name coming from my accounts) but won't talk about saving money, or finding cheaper providers, or even our long-term goals. He'll become angry and frustrated, and eventually revert back to the "it's not my fault, it's the system's fault" line. He's starting to engage in anti-capitalist, pro-communism discourse on social media; he blames "the system" for making him unmotivated and too exhausted to look for a better job.
I want kids, I want vacations, I want to fix up our house. I want him to not look at every conversation about money as a pissing contest - we're supposed to be in this together, but there are days I feel like I'm his mother doling out his allowance. Is this worth counseling? If we talk it out how can I approach it so he doesn't get defensive?
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/9yijzi/i_29f_cant_talk_to_my_husband_29m_about_money_and/
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Nov 23, 2018 22:02
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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When I entered law school in 2007, I attended an orientation on saving money and avoiding excessive student loan debt. During this orientation, we were told that we should just plan to eat out for most meals. We would be studying a lot, and our groceries would spoil in our fridge when we didn’t have time to cook. That would be a bigger waste of money than just ordering take-out for every meal for three years.
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Dec 8, 2018 18:50
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/8wt6uc/church_wants_their_10_and_i_dont_want_to_rip_my/
quote:
Church wants their 10% and I don’t want to rip my husband’s [33m] dream from him.
Husband plays on a worship team. We just left our main church he has played at for years for a position at a local mega church. Playing music is who he is, his talent and passion.
Mega Church has a big set of reasonable rules for him to play- no drinking, being a good member of society etc. One rule that I understand is tithing. They expect 10% PLUS giving on top of that for events at church. We can not budget that in right now, with kids, me starting nursing school, car and mortgage payments, and not to mention our youngest has health issues that are expensive.
He has a few weeks before he has to sign his agreement with them and we are at a loss of what to do. I know this is his passion, but we’d basically be playing $4-5000 a year for him to pursue his passion in tithes alone. It would literally take food out of our kid’s mouths, we wouldn’t have any spending money and would probably dip into savings.
Husband wants to volunteer to play music for a church. They have a sick kid, and paying for the privilege of volunteering will break them, financially.
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Dec 22, 2018 17:01
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 3, 2024 08:09
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- Staryberry
- Oct 16, 2009
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If you marry it, then it gets legally redefined again to be your spouse, but then it has to go through the immigration process. This could take years and thousands of dollars in plane tickets and attorney's fees. I would stick with your car being a horse because then it's just a quarantine for a couple of weeks and a visit to the vette.
The car vette is a must for any sports car enthusiast.
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Dec 24, 2018 04:53
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May 3, 2017 00:56
BWM BINGO! 