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C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Democracy at work.

So this is the thread where you will vote in the Best Wrestling Talkers Tournament, a 32-person tournament to figure out who had the greatest gift of gab in the history of wrestling. I'll post the bracket in the OP and will update it as necessary. A friendly reminder that this thread is only for voting, not for discussion. We have a whole other thread for you to strong-arm people in and it's right here! https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3819898



BRACKET

PAUL E. DANGEROUSLY REGION

Quarters

#1 Paul Heyman (#1 Overall seed) d. #8 New Jack 33-7

#5 Arn Anderson d. #4 Terry Funk 20-19

#3 Bobby Heenan d. #6 Gene Okerlund 37-3

#2 Mick Foley d. #7 Jesse Ventura 27-13

Semis

#1 Paul Heyman d. #5 Arn Anderson 27-6

#3 Bobby Heenan d. #2 Mick Foley 27-6

Finals

#3 Bobby Heenan d. #1 Paul Heyman 19-4



BLACK SCORPION REGION

Quarters

#1 Ric Flair (#2 Overall seed) d. #8 Paul Bearer 40-0

#4 Nick Bockwinkel d. #5 Larry Sweeney 23-14

#3 Jake Roberts d. #6 William Regal 37-3

#2 Chris Jericho d. #7 John Cena 29-11

Semis

#1 Ric Flair d. #4 Nick Bockwinkel 29-4

#3 Jake Roberts d. #2 Chris Jericho 24-9

Finals

#1 Ric Flair d. #3 Jake Roberts 16-7


RINGMASTER REGION

Quarters

#1 Steve Austin (#3 Overall seed) d. #8 Hulk Hogan 33-4

#4 Vince McMahon d. #5 The Miz 24-13

#3 Roddy Piper d. #6 Jerry Lawler 27-10

#2 Dusty Rhodes d. #7 Scott Steiner 31-6

Semis

#1 Steve Austin d. #4 Vince McMahon 28-5

#2 Dusty Rhodes d. #3 Roddy Piper 25-8

Finals

#1 Steve Austin d. #2 Dusty Rhodes 17-6


FLEX KAVANA REGION

Quarters

#1 The Rock (#4 Overall seed) d. #8 Raven 34-3

#4 Randy Savage d. #5 Rick Rude 30-7

#3 Jim Cornette d. #6 Jim Ross 29-8

#2 CM Punk d. #7 Ted DiBiase 32-5

Semis

#1 The Rock d. #4 Randy Savage 17-16

#2 CM Punk d. #3 Jim Cornette 19-14

Finals

#1 The Rock d. #2 CM Punk 12-11


FINAL FOUR

#3 Bobby Heenan (Paul E. Dangerously Region Winner) d. #1 The Rock (Flex Kavana Region Winner) 20-4
#1 Ric Flair (Black Scorpion Region Winner) d. #1 Steve Austin (Ringmaster Region Winner 17-6

CHAMPIONSHIP

Bobby Heenan
Ric Flair

C. Everett Koop fucked around with this message at 15:32 on Jun 5, 2017

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C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
ROUND 0 OPENING BATTLE ROYALE

Because every good card should start with a massive battle royale clusterfuck.

We had 48 nominations, but out of those 48 only 26 were nominated multiple times. Those 26 are already into the tournament and have been seeded and placed. As I'm running a 32-person tournament on the grounds that I ain't here to do math, we need to narrow down the 22 that only received a little bit of love to 6 sacrificial lambs.

Out of the following list, vote for your top 3. The top six vote getters will be inserted into the tournament and promptly voted out.

Voting will be open until midnight Thursday 5/19 EST aka God's timezone

New Jack
Lance Russell
Scott Steiner
Pentagon Jr.
Eddie Kingston
Billy Graham
Paul Bearer
Dean Ambrose
Raven
Santino Marella
Vickie Guerrero
Ernest Miller
Eric Bischoff
Ted DiBiase
Edge
Hulk Hogan
Bray Wyatt
Enzo Amore
Renee Young
Shane Douglas
Xavier Woods

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
And that's a wrap to this round of voting! Closing the thread for now, will reopen once I tally up all the votes, have the full bracket ready and we can start this sucker for real!

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
First, those were a lotta really weird Kingdom Hearts/MVC teams there :staredog:

Second, the eliminated:

0 - Renee Young, Sid
1 - Pentagon Jr, Ernest Miller, Eric Bischoff, Shane Douglas
2 - Dean Ambrose
3 - Lance Russell, Eddie Kingston, Xavier Woods, Enzo Amore
4 - Santino Marella, Edge
7 - Bray Wyatt
9 - Billy Graham

And moving on:

10 - Paul Bearer, New Jack
12 - Hulk Hogan
13 - Raven
18 - Ted DiBiase
23 - Scott Steiner

Bracket will be up shortly as will the next round of voting!!!!!!

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Bracket is now in the OP! Feel free to feverishly comb over it and obsess endlessly over how injust it is!

Next round of voting will be for the top two regions. Only vote for one in each matchup and make it obvious who you're voting for. If I have to guess, I ain't counting it. You'd think it wouldn't be hard but you'd be surprised.

Also no discussions in the voting thread. Oatgan. :colbert:

VOTING WILL GO THROUGH THE WEEKEND, CLOSING AT 00:00 5/22 EST, i.e. Sunday into Monday

PAUL E. DANGEROUSLY REGION

#1 Paul Heyman
#8 New Jack

#4 Terry Funk
#5 Arn Anderson

#3 Bobby Heenan
#6 Gene Okerlund

#2 Mick Foley
#7 Jesse Ventura


BLACK SCORPION REGION

#1 Ric Flair
#8 Paul Bearer

#4 Nick Bockwinkel
#5 Larry Sweeney

#3 Jake Roberts
#6 William Regal

#2 Chris Jericho
#7 John Cena

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Voting is closed for the Paul E. Dangerously and Black Scorpion Regions. I meant to close it at midnight but got sidetracked. I'll have the tallies up shortly and posted in the OP.

Meanwhile, voting is now open in the Ringmaster and Flex Kavana Regions. Since I let the first one go long, I'll let voting here go through Wednesday at midnight ET. The brackets:

RINGMASTER REGION

#1 Steve Austin (#3 Overall seed)
#8 Hulk Hogan

#4 Vince McMahon
#5 The Miz

#3 Roddy Piper
#6 Jerry Lawler

#2 Dusty Rhodes
#7 Scott Steiner


FLEX KAVANA REGION

#1 The Rock (#4 Overall seed)
#8 Raven

#4 Randy Savage
#5 Rick Rude

#3 Jim Cornette
#6 Jim Ross

#2 CM Punk
#7 Ted DiBiase

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008

Feels Villeneuve posted:

Arn was great in early 90s WCW and was arguably better as the talker of the Horsemen than Flair. He got a very well-deserved "best on promos" award from the WOR in 1990, back when that award almost went to Jim Cornette by defualt.

For some great work check out some of his promos in the Horsemen's 1990 program when they betray Sting.

RacistGuidingLight posted:

I saw it. Moot point but Terry Funk was all around better.

what have i told you people about leaving this thread for voting only :colbert:

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Voting's closed for the quarters. I'll reopen once I count the votes and have the full semis ready.

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
SEMI-FINAL VOTING IS NOW OPEN!!!!! VOTING CLOSES IN 48 HOURS, MIDNIGHT SATURDAY 5/27 ET

PAUL E. DANGEROUSLY REGION

#1 Paul Heyman
#5 Arn Anderson

#2 Mick Foley
#3 Bobby Heenan


BLACK SCORPION REGION

#1 Ric Flair
#4 Nick Bockwinkel

#2 Chris Jericho
#3 Jake Roberts


RINGMASTER REGION

#1 Steve Austin
#4 Vince McMahon

#2 Dusty Rhodes
#3 Roddy Piper


FLEX KAVANA REGION

#1 The Rock
#4 Randy Savage

#2 CM Punk
#3 Jim Cornette

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Voting is closed for this round. Results and next round of voting will be up later.

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
VOTING IS NOW OPEN ONCE AGAIN! IT WILL CLOSE MIDNIGHT THURSDAY INTO FRIDAY EST

PAUL E. DANGEROUSLY REGION

#1 Paul Heyman
#3 Bobby Heenan


BLACK SCORPION REGION

#1 Ric Flair
#3 Jake Roberts


RINGMASTER REGION

#1 Steve Austin
#2 Dusty Rhodes


FLEX KAVANA REGION

#1 The Rock
#2 CM Punk

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Voting is closed, I'll allow that last one since I didn't close the thread when I said I would. I'll reopen once we're ready for the semis!!!!!!!

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
VOTING IS OPEN FOR THE FINAL FOUR. IT WILL CLOSE SUNDAY JUNE 4th AT MIDNIGHT

#3 Bobby Heenan (Paul E. Dangerously Region Winner) vs. #1 The Rock (Flex Kavana Region Winner)

#1 Ric Flair (Black Scorpion Region Winner) vs. #1 Steve Austin (Ringmaster Region Winner

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
Voting is closed for this round. Finals will be up soon!!!!!!!!!

C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
IN THE FINALS YOU WILL VOTE FOR TWO OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS PHOTO



PLEASE VOTE FOR EITHER MR. PERFECT OR MEAN GENE RIC FLAIR OR BOBBY HEENAN!!!!!

VOTING WILL CLOSE AFTER WEDNESDAY 6/7 AT MIDNIGHT!!!!!!!!

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C. Everett Koop
Aug 18, 2008
YOUR WINNER, BY A COUNT OF EIGHT VOTES TO SEVEN VOTES TO SEVEN VOTES OVER RIC FLAIR AND A SURPRISE RUN-IN BY SCOTT STEINER, IS BOBBY HEENAN!

Bobby Heenan is now the undisputed greatest talker in the history of wrestling. This is accepted fact any differences of opinion are null and void.

Thank you all for participating, the dwindling number of votes showed your great enthusiasm for this event. Remind me never to run anything ever again. Jinder shouda won.

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