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Crazycryodude posted:Half, we get our cut and if his bosses notice he's sending nothing home he'll get replaced and we'll have to do all this bullshit again.
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Jun 27, 2017 17:51
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Crazycryodude posted:Half, we get our cut and if his bosses notice he's sending nothing home he'll get replaced and we'll have to do all this bullshit again.
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Jun 27, 2017 18:20
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Give me half, or you'll be in halves posted:The toll keeper seems doubtful that their queen will allow it, but he certainly doesn't want to get eaten. He agrees to the deal, but says he'll have to clear it with his superiors in the capitol. Back where we started posted:What's the next step in your climb to dominance? Brutality: 16% - Finesse: 84% Cunning: 65% - Honor: 35% Disdain: 93% - Vigilance: 7% Infamy: 47% Wealth: 6500 gold coins Wounds: Uninjured
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Jun 27, 2017 18:52
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Jun 27, 2017 19:01
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We've been building up to this, go see the queen in her city hopefully to explain how she's about to retire.
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Jun 27, 2017 19:21
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Get all up in Brenda's grill and politely explain that she's no longer needed.
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Jun 27, 2017 20:20
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A goblin's not going to cut it for a meeting with royalty, so let's go ourselves.
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Jun 27, 2017 23:04
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Hi there. We can work something out or I can subscribe you to the Columbia House Record Club. Your call.
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Jun 27, 2017 23:08
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Halfsies, like the above said, best not to arouse suspicion, at least, not so quickly. It may be our nature as a dragon to be greedy, but I think we can stave off our lust for gold enough to play the long game. Edit: Dagnabbit, a few seconds too slow. Oh well, might as well go ourselves . Let's face it, no one takes goblins seriously. Gilgamesh255 fucked around with this message at 23:29 on Jun 27, 2017 |
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Jun 27, 2017 23:25
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I say we do a [b] personal flyby [\b] over the city, burn a few buildings, roar menacingly at high volume, and so on. Then we send in the goblin to explain our terms, reminding the humans how much they're beneath us.
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Jun 28, 2017 00:30
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Cool castle. Shame if something happened to it... posted:It doesn't take long before you are circling over their puny city; it would burn beautifully, and you could smash it into flinders, but it's full of wealth. You can smell the treasure from here. You settle heavily in the main plaza in front of the palace. As you land, your tail idly destroys the ancient statue of some dead king.
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Jun 28, 2017 19:40
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Let him finish. That way, it'll be even funnier when we bite him in half.
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Jun 28, 2017 20:16
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Eat him now. We do not suffer fools
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Jun 28, 2017 20:44
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This is business, and one should never negotiate on an empty stomach. Eat him.Junpei posted:what the heck are flinders? Hi diddly hoh, combusterinos! Dictionary.com posted:flinders ...I like my explanation better.
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Jun 28, 2017 20:45
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Eat him.
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Jun 28, 2017 20:57
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Past the lips, over the gums, watch out stomach, here it comes posted:You knock him down before he ever completes his little speech. A claw swipe knocks him sideways off of his horse and sends the mount fleeing in blind terror. The knight rolls and awkwardly tries to get to his feet. As he does, he looks up to see you dangling the remains of the plaza's statue over his head. "Duck," you suggest, and he does. Then your head snaps down and catches him in your jaw. He struggles, half in and half out of your mouth, as you decide whether to eat him. Stats unchanged.
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Jun 28, 2017 21:00
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He's not worth the trouble. The armor gives us indigestion anyways. Let him go.
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Jun 28, 2017 21:02
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Allow him to live Now we are just loving with him 
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Jun 28, 2017 21:05
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Allow him to live, he's too pathetic to eat.
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Jun 28, 2017 21:35
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Spit him out! It would be funny if we threatened him to take off his armor, and ate him after he did. "Thanks, I forgot my can opener!"
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Jun 28, 2017 22:16
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On second thought, you taste terrible. posted:"You're too small to bother with," you growl, "and it's funnier to let you live knowing that you failed. Can't have you running after me, though." With a flick of your neck, you fling him into a nearby building. You hear bones snap as he hits the wall and promptly forget about him. No stat changes.
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Jun 28, 2017 23:29
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Mine now
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Jun 28, 2017 23:38
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Give me keys to your kingdom, then tell me: are you tasty?
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Jun 28, 2017 23:46
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Your kingdom is now my kingdom. Any questions?
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Jun 29, 2017 03:39
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Junpei posted:"I am Queen Juliet." Not anymore.
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Jun 29, 2017 03:43
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This is my land now posted:How do you want to command the queen? No stat changes. And this is probably the most blatant "What stat do you wish to gain" choice that wasn't the introduction to the stats.
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Jun 29, 2017 04:38
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I r smrt
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Jun 29, 2017 06:22
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Well, no point in changing now, we are a clever dragon.
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Jun 29, 2017 09:32
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Clever girl.
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Jun 29, 2017 12:16
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Fourthing cleverly.
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Jun 29, 2017 13:53
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You know you I know you know posted:"Dearest queen," you croon, "I am not without mercy. I am able to kill you and everyone you protect. Alternately, I could decimate your kingdom; your few remaining subjects would kill you themselves for betraying them to a fearsome dragon. I have a better idea, however. In exchange for a somewhat burdensome amount of treasure, I will rule you from afar. You will become MY kingdom, and my subjects, and in return for your obedience and tribute I will protect you. What say you?" Stats unchanged.
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Jul 3, 2017 23:01
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Now. Who the hell says no to a massive dragon that's 3 seconds away from devouring you? Give her time and the only thing she'll do with it is raise an army and get foolish ideas about who's kingdom this really is.
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Jul 3, 2017 23:21
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Like hell she's going to actually consider it if we leave her be. We'll take that oath of loyalty now, if you don't mind.
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Jul 3, 2017 23:32
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Nothing's going to change in the next twenty minutes, Queenie. Answer now.
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Jul 3, 2017 23:34
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Decide now, if not we should just eat her.
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Jul 4, 2017 06:15
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It's not very clever to give the queen and her underlings a chance to build up a defence. Going once...going twice...
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Jul 4, 2017 06:45
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You have twenty seconds.
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Jul 4, 2017 23:14
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Oh yeah, sure, we'll give you plenty of time to rally the troops and move them into position to screw us over--yeah, no, how about NOW.
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Jul 6, 2017 14:39
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Sorry for the wait, everyone.Bow. NOW. posted:"NO!" you roar. "You must decide this instant, human. Is not the ability to make rapid decisions a good quality in a ruler?" Double Dragon posted:You rule over your territory for several uneventful years before your goblin minions begin to report some disturbing news. They have seen another dragon raiding within your territory, seizing tribute that ought to be yours, and eating your prey. Based on their description, you realize that the dragon is none other than your elder clutchmate, Axilmeus. Brutality: 15% - Finesse: 85% Cunning: 65% - Honor: 35% Disdain: 93% - Vigilance: 7% Infamy: 40% Wealth: 8000 gold coins Wounds: Uninjured
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Jul 21, 2017 20:07
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A state that can't maintain its integrity isn't going to be a state much longer. Go slap our brother around (preferably in a sneaky way, we probably can't take him in a straight up fight).
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Jul 21, 2017 20:14
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