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Big Butt Skinner
Apr 16, 2005

Blueprints of the dummy...
Notarized photos of you making the dummy...
And an alternate wording for the banner: "Buttzilla."

ProfessorMurder posted:

This one, though is spot on. Loved the MK movies as a kid. Not so much now.
I have the opposite experience. I hated those movies as a kid, and now I enjoy them because they're hilariously bad.

I genuinely liked the Street Fighter movie when I was like, 8. Then I realized how terrible it was when I was a little older. And now I enjoy it again for that very reason.

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kumba
Nov 8, 2003

I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

enjoy the ride

Lipstick Apathy

Wandle Shaytham posted:

I genuinely liked the Street Fighter movie when I was like, 8. Then I realized how terrible it was when I was a little older. And now I enjoy it again for that very reason.

same, raul julia owns

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

Jabberlock posted:

I watched A Knight's Tale a lot, mostly because it was the only medieval movie we owned and I loved that stuff. It's not really a terrible movie, just a corny and aggressively mediocre one. The result though was I was a Heath Ledger fan before everyone else jumped on the bandwagon.

i was getting p old by the time that came out, but still dumb enough not to realize it so yeah. i watched a lot of similar aggressively mediocre ones like dragonheart, thee musketeers, and first knight(i used to think this was one of the best movies ever made lol). i still like three musketeers tho

also goes without saying but ever Jim Carrey movie of the 90s. loved the poo poo out of them then but awful now (except truman show is still p good)

Xaris fucked around with this message at 17:13 on Jun 27, 2017

Dial-a-Dog
May 22, 2001

Class Warcraft posted:

When I was a kid I would watch this scifi movie called Screamers over and over again. The premise was some soldiers were fighting this never ending war on some fuckin sand planet and there were these robot things covered in buzzsaws called screamers that had been dropped into the sand to act as like mobile landmines, basically. Anyway, to young me this made total sense was a super awesome.

Then as time went on I started doubting my memories of the movie, especially since I had never met anyone who had heard of this movie, and the premise seemed too absurd to be true. I decided I'd probably dreamed the movie up.

But then lo and behold it was real, starring Peter Weller, no less. Does not hold up well on re-watch, especially the "twist" they reuse like 5 times in the movie where it turns out X character was a screamer all along. By the end something like 75% of the cast turned out to be hidden robots.

I liked screamers and probably still would, it will always have a place in my heart as the only movie I can think of where you have to smoke cigarettes or you'll die horribly

Lord Frankenstyle
Dec 3, 2005

Mmmm,
You smell like Lysol Wipes.
I fondly remember Screamers too. Even young me thought the "twist(s)" were lame, but the whole wandering through a dead hellscape stalked by robot/rat/circular saws was great.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...

3 Ninjas is demonstrably terrible. Watched the poo poo out of it when I was a kid.

Volcott
Mar 30, 2010

People paying American dollars to let other people know they didn't agree with someone's position on something is the lifeblood of these forums.
Rocky loves Emily.

Also, they probably got pretty savage beatings for spray painting those ancient ninja masks.

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

Clamps McGraw posted:

My first email address was bahweepgrahnahweepninibong@

Nice

Fellis
Feb 14, 2012

Kid, don't threaten me. There are worse things than death, and uh, I can do all of them.
Swordfish

An excellent piece of cinema when i was a kid, nowadays I don't have to sit through bad movies to see boobs

FactsAreUseless posted:

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie. I'm honestly amazed my parents didn't drown me in the bathtub.

My parents hated themselves enough to take me to the live stage show!

kumba
Nov 8, 2003

I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

enjoy the ride

Lipstick Apathy

Fellis posted:

My parents hated themselves enough to take me to the live stage show!

holy poo poo i forgot i saw that until you mentioned it

that show was neat iirc but yea him sure anything would have been neat to 8 year old me

Spiderjelly
Aug 22, 2006

Sign of evil.

Rupert Buttermilk posted:

3 Ninjas is demonstrably terrible. Watched the poo poo out of it when I was a kid.

Just watched a fight scene. Lordy lordy, that's lovely.

kumba
Nov 8, 2003

I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

enjoy the ride

Lipstick Apathy
a half an inch.... between victory and defeat!

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!

Jake Mustache posted:

I never cared too much for the original Superman movies, mostly because he wasn't Batman and Spiderman and also because of all the liberties the filmmakers took, such as reversing the globe/time and ripping the S of his chest and throwing it at that guy. But I did like Superman 3 due to Richard Prior and it all being based on computers or what have you. Would watch every time it came on HBO/Showtime. Last year around when BvSDoJ came out Superman 3 was on a cable channel and I watched. Boy, was it horrible. Cheesy action, dialog, effects, you name it. I was astounded this had ever been made and I hadn't even made it out of the opening scenes.

Seeing Richard Prior with the big foam cowboy always make me laugh so I'll watch just that scene. The first Superman movie holds a special plan my heat because it was the first one I saw on a VCR and I was floored that not only could you watch the movie whenever you wanted (didn't have to wait for it to come on TV) but you could also pause, rewind and fast forward. It was like discovering the wheel.

I love watching Pump Up the Volume as a teen but that movie now falls into the category where cell phones and the internet could have solved all of their problems.

I recently watched the Breakfast Club and found myself agreeing with nearly everything Mr. Vernon said.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...

Spiderjelly posted:

Just watched a fight scene. Lordy lordy, that's lovely.

It DID feature Super Mario Bros 3, like my earlier mention of The Wizard did. I just noticed this.

I guess I'm obsessed. Any other old movie mention the game?

Harold Stassen
Jan 24, 2016
3 pages and nobody has said Twister?

Independence Day also sucks more than I remembered, and stuff like this just explodes your childhood notion of greatness
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0Cho9WeDBo

Tomato Burger
Jun 18, 2007
The secret is granola.

cool new Polack jokes posted:

3 pages and nobody has said Twister?

Independence Day also sucks more than I remembered, and stuff like this just explodes your childhood notion of greatness
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0Cho9WeDBo

I watched the Independence Day sequel and it was horrible enough to make me question if the first one was any good. This July 4th I'm going to re-watch ID4 and find out for myself. As a kid the alien popping open during the autopsy creeped me out so much that I'd leave the room when that was about to happen.

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY
Nthing Kevin Smith's J &Sbob movies. They were fun and cool as a kid, but I'm not going to revisit them.

About a week ago I was smoking and watching The Matrix, since hell, that's what you do, right? Get high, watch this here trippy movie from the olden days. Here is my advice. Do not watch it. Do not say "jeez, it's really been that long? i gotta see how it holds up!" It does not. It's probably a mix of 1. was always really dorky and pretentious 2. everybody copying it in action movies up until very recently. Still some good scenes, but I started skimming after the cubicle scene and eventually just skipped to the last fight. Sigh.

And this:

Rubellavator posted:

Starship troopers
Is just blasphemy.

Nessa
Dec 15, 2008

Xaris posted:

also goes without saying but ever Jim Carrey movie of the 90s. loved the poo poo out of them then but awful now (except truman show is still p good)

Even The Mask? I loved that movie as a kid, but haven't seen it in years.

I once hit the DVD of the movie from a cereal box and was disappointed that there were some scenes cut.

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

phasmid posted:

Nthing Kevin Smith's J &Sbob movies. They were fun and cool as a kid, but I'm not going to revisit them.

About a week ago I was smoking and watching The Matrix, since hell, that's what you do, right? Get high, watch this here trippy movie from the olden days. Here is my advice. Do not watch it. Do not say "jeez, it's really been that long? i gotta see how it holds up!" It does not. It's probably a mix of 1. was always really dorky and pretentious 2. everybody copying it in action movies up until very recently. Still some good scenes, but I started skimming after the cubicle scene and eventually just skipped to the last fight. Sigh.

And this:

Is just blasphemy.

i think matrix1 still works OK, but yeah it's been hit hard by being copied/parodied to death, and 90s CGI just looks like poo poo (almost any cgi-heavy 90s movie is borderline cringe now)

Mordja
Apr 26, 2014

Hell Gem

kumba posted:

same, raul julia owns

He only took the part to make his kids happy. :unsmith:

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
Once Upon a Forest.

SweetMercifulCrap!
Jan 28, 2012
Lipstick Apathy
Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

When you're a kid you can't process why it sucks, so I'm pretty sure every kid just assumed that it was actually good and they just didn't quite get it, and forced themselves to like it.

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY

sweetmercifulcrap posted:

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

When you're a kid you can't process why it sucks, so I'm pretty sure every kid just assumed that it was actually good and they just didn't quite get it, and forced themselves to like it.

Darth Maul. That's p much it.

RyokoTK
Feb 12, 2012

I am cool.
I remember being seriously spooked out by the made-for-TV version of The Langoliers as a kid, only to rewatch it a bit later and realized just how completely laughable it is. Especially the incredible special effects.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=izxpXWBRjng

:laffo:

facebook jihad
Dec 18, 2007

by R. Guyovich
Speaking of Kevin Smith movies, I really can't decide if Clerks is bad or not. I loved it when I was younger. I think I still like it? The acting is really bad but it's charming.

Volcott
Mar 30, 2010

People paying American dollars to let other people know they didn't agree with someone's position on something is the lifeblood of these forums.

Pick posted:

Once Upon a Forest.

That log cutting machine was hype as poo poo.

SweetMercifulCrap!
Jan 28, 2012
Lipstick Apathy

phasmid posted:

Darth Maul. That's p much it.

Even Darth Maul sucks though, you know nothing about him, he just shows up to kill off Qui-Gon, another pointless character, in a boring, tension-less fight. His double light saber is the only memorable thing about him. I know I'm just spitting out Plinkett review stuff verbatim but I genuinely do laugh at myself for having Episode I posters and toys back then.

Tumble
Jun 24, 2003
I'm not thinking of anything!
When I was 11 or 12 my dad finally realized he didn't give a poo poo what I watched, so my friend and I were allowed to watch R-Rated Movies (as long as we didn't tell our moms.) Boy oh boy we didn't give a poo poo if they were any good, if it was an R-Rated action, horror, or sci-fi movie we were all the gently caress about it.

We loved:
Creepshow 1, 2 and 3 (actually the first one is pretty sweet)
Robocop 1 and 2 (we actually thought the 3rd one was dumb as poo poo. And we figured out why: IT IS PG-13 LIKE FOR BABIES!)
Death Race 2000
The Blob (The 1988 remake. It's actually kind of the poo poo, super gory and they kill off a kid towards the end, which we thought was loving awesome.)
Sleepwalkers
Total Recall (A sweet movie)
Starship Troopers! (This was the 1st r-rated movie we were allowed to see in the theaters. Some ticket lady tried to rat us out, telling my dad "This is very violent movie." but my dad was like "Then I'm sure they're going to love it. 3 please.")
Speed (This one we actually weren't too in love with, it wasn't quite r-rated enough in our opinions. But we owned the VHS so we still watched it all the time)
All of the Aliens and both Terminators. (Of course. Those were required viewing in the 90s.)

Oh poo poo, AND MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE! That movie was so bad that my mom knew it was R-Rated but she still didn't give a poo poo if we watched it. And she is a properly strict British lady too, so it had to be a properly dumb movie for her to let us watch it. "It's nonsense I don't know why you watch this one so much." Because it had killer trucks and steamrollers mom, duh.

And then basically every movie in the horror sections of video stores. We would spend a long-rear end time just staring at movie covers, trying to find the one with the grossest cover. Most of them were terrible, but they were R-Rated so they were also great. Oh yea, we LOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVED the Critter's movies. Basically anything where people got eaten by monsters was The poo poo.

We hated Ernest Scared Stupid though. I think both of us were just way too loving scared by it, because we used to love the other Ernest movies, but we'd always skip over Scared Stupid because it's actually pretty drat scary.

Tumble fucked around with this message at 21:28 on Jun 27, 2017

STOP LITTERING
Sep 11, 2005

I think one summer I watched Police Academy 2: Their first Assignment 5 times in one day.

No kid growing up in these times will ever understand the joy of that.

E: I think the lack of ability to tape the ABC Movie of the Week or whatever probably has something to do with that though. My parents were pretty much fine with me watching anything adult oriented as long as all the swear words were removed. Violence? sex stuff? all OK! but no swear words. I think the only OK'd swear word was when Data said "oh poo poo" when they were about to crash in that one Star Trek movie, same movie where it is earlier implied that Picards whole family dies in a 24th century house fire: way more hosed up than any swear word.

STOP LITTERING fucked around with this message at 22:14 on Jun 27, 2017

River Crab
May 12, 2005

Perhaps a careful review of your options is in order.
Most of the movies I came here to post have been mentioned already (Dragonheart, Independence Day, and The Phantom Menace) but I have to add The Rock. It seemed so awesome to me when I had just entered middle school, but for some reason the idea that below the prison is an incinerator that is somehow still operating with massive spinning gears and shooting flames bothers me way more than the stupid action movie premise.

Also, Event Horizon.

Zeroisanumber
Oct 23, 2010

Nap Ghost
Red Sonja



Do you like Arnold Schwarzenegger? Do you like Arnold Schwarzenegger teaming up with a hot redhead to slay some dudes and kill and evil queen or whatever?

"That sounds cool what does the rest of the cast look li..."



"Oh. Is it as bad as it looks?"

It's loving terrible.

Dubplate Fire
Aug 1, 2010

:hfive: bruvs be4 luvs

Tumble posted:

When I was 11 or 12 my dad finally realized he didn't give a poo poo what I watched, so my friend and I were allowed to watch R-Rated Movies (as long as we didn't tell our moms.) Boy oh boy we didn't give a poo poo if they were any good, if it was an R-Rated action, horror, or sci-fi movie we were all the gently caress about it.

We loved:
Creepshow 1, 2 and 3 (actually the first one is pretty sweet)
Robocop 1 and 2 (we actually thought the 3rd one was dumb as poo poo. And we figured out why: IT IS PG-13 LIKE FOR BABIES!)
Death Race 2000
The Blob (The 1988 remake. It's actually kind of the poo poo, super gory and they kill off a kid towards the end, which we thought was loving awesome.)
Sleepwalkers
Total Recall (A sweet movie)
Starship Troopers! (This was the 1st r-rated movie we were allowed to see in the theaters. Some ticket lady tried to rat us out, telling my dad "This is very violent movie." but my dad was like "Then I'm sure they're going to love it. 3 please.")
Speed (This one we actually weren't too in love with, it wasn't quite r-rated enough in our opinions. But we owned the VHS so we still watched it all the time)
All of the Aliens and both Terminators. (Of course. Those were required viewing in the 90s.)

Oh poo poo, AND MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE! That movie was so bad that my mom knew it was R-Rated but she still didn't give a poo poo if we watched it. And she is a properly strict British lady too, so it had to be a properly dumb movie for her to let us watch it. "It's nonsense I don't know why you watch this one so much." Because it had killer trucks and steamrollers mom, duh.

And then basically every movie in the horror sections of video stores. We would spend a long-rear end time just staring at movie covers, trying to find the one with the grossest cover. Most of them were terrible, but they were R-Rated so they were also great. Oh yea, we LOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVED the Critter's movies. Basically anything where people got eaten by monsters was The poo poo.

We hated Ernest Scared Stupid though. I think both of us were just way too loving scared by it, because we used to love the other Ernest movies, but we'd always skip over Scared Stupid because it's actually pretty drat scary.

This but I was 6 when my dad gave up. Earnest scared stupid was p good tho.

CRIP EATIN BREAD
Jun 24, 2002

Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T



Soiled Meat

kecske posted:

mac and me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5le9sYdYkM

kumba
Nov 8, 2003

I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

enjoy the ride

Lipstick Apathy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VxBQZPkdQMM

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

communist kangaroo posted:

the antagonist was made of purple Nickelodeon slime and I feel like that eagle zord trying to imitate metro tracks would have murdered everyone on that train


fun fact: the guy who played Ivan Ooze also played Belloq in Raiders of the Lost Ark

Nessa
Dec 15, 2008

Tumble posted:

When I was 11 or 12 my dad finally realized he didn't give a poo poo what I watched, so my friend and I were allowed to watch R-Rated Movies (as long as we didn't tell our moms.) Boy oh boy we didn't give a poo poo if they were any good, if it was an R-Rated action, horror, or sci-fi movie we were all the gently caress about it.

We loved:
Creepshow 1, 2 and 3 (actually the first one is pretty sweet)
Robocop 1 and 2 (we actually thought the 3rd one was dumb as poo poo. And we figured out why: IT IS PG-13 LIKE FOR BABIES!)
Death Race 2000
The Blob (The 1988 remake. It's actually kind of the poo poo, super gory and they kill off a kid towards the end, which we thought was loving awesome.)
Sleepwalkers
Total Recall (A sweet movie)
Starship Troopers! (This was the 1st r-rated movie we were allowed to see in the theaters. Some ticket lady tried to rat us out, telling my dad "This is very violent movie." but my dad was like "Then I'm sure they're going to love it. 3 please.")
Speed (This one we actually weren't too in love with, it wasn't quite r-rated enough in our opinions. But we owned the VHS so we still watched it all the time)
All of the Aliens and both Terminators. (Of course. Those were required viewing in the 90s.)

Oh poo poo, AND MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE! That movie was so bad that my mom knew it was R-Rated but she still didn't give a poo poo if we watched it. And she is a properly strict British lady too, so it had to be a properly dumb movie for her to let us watch it. "It's nonsense I don't know why you watch this one so much." Because it had killer trucks and steamrollers mom, duh.

And then basically every movie in the horror sections of video stores. We would spend a long-rear end time just staring at movie covers, trying to find the one with the grossest cover. Most of them were terrible, but they were R-Rated so they were also great. Oh yea, we LOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVED the Critter's movies. Basically anything where people got eaten by monsters was The poo poo.

We hated Ernest Scared Stupid though. I think both of us were just way too loving scared by it, because we used to love the other Ernest movies, but we'd always skip over Scared Stupid because it's actually pretty drat scary.

That's exactly why Ernest Scared Stupid was the best one.

My dad let me watch lots of r-rated movies when I was 4 years old, including the 80's remake of The Blob, Total Recall, and Rocky Horror Picture Show. He got me to laugh at the gory special effects so I wouldn't be scared.

From what my parents tell me, the only show that actually scared me as a child was an episode of Babar that featured a lake monster. I refused to take a bath until my parents swapped out the dark green tub mat with a different colour.

There was also an X-Files episode that creeped me out a lot too. I remember having a dream about hoards of glowing, green bugs in a dark forest.

Bananaquiter
Aug 20, 2008

Ron's not here.


I watched Freejack a lot growing up and I will stan for it 'til the day I die.

Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009
I thought the third ninja turtles movie was pretty dope when I was a kid, in fact it was my favorite of the series. I still think it gets a bad rap but I acknowledge now that it's the worst of the three.

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
when I was a kid my dad took me to the first pokemon movie and it was so bad he just walked out and waited in the lobby until the movie was over. I liked it though

then a few years ago I took my younger cousin to see The Last Airbender movie. He liked it but I didn't. And as we were leaving he was talking about how they were gonna make sequel movies to show the other element bending and I was like lol nope. And it really helped me bond with my dad and understand what he had gone through with me

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gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005
citizen kane was a great movie. when i was 7 years old

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