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 *is a local lord of the manor; has the serfs grow cannabis; drinks mead while drunk and stoned as the troubadours sing in the oil language; requires crops as part of my seigneurial dues* maybe I should send some guys to the crusade or I can join the templars? *sighs as a jester falls into a pit of manure and drowns in it*
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Aug 23, 2017 15:56
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I am somber in the presence of thine thread.
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Aug 23, 2017 16:34
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today ill have some sex *gets all the diseases*
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Aug 23, 2017 16:36
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Oh boy I can't wait to see what today will bring! *gets raped, burned, and killed by neighboring army because its perfectly normal*
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Aug 23, 2017 16:42
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Anyone talkin poo poo about the His Lordship in here? No? How bout you? You say anything? No? Good. I don't wanna see anyone talkin poo poo about His Lordship in here. Also I'm taking half of your crops. For His Lordship.
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Aug 23, 2017 16:46
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the op can sucketh on mine balls
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Aug 23, 2017 16:52
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a goodly sucke for my balls hath become dry
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Aug 23, 2017 16:52
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verily, i poo poo
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Aug 23, 2017 16:56
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watch Richard III start a war
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Aug 23, 2017 17:04
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No what you don is you burn the limestone. Yeah you burn it real hot and spread it on the fields. No I know we spread plenty of poo poo, but it's not working. What does this have to do with aether? Wait is that a bubole? I gotta go.
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Aug 23, 2017 17:23
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in'
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i usurp this thread so that i may fart within. despair, for it is most ftinky
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Aug 23, 2017 17:25
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*joins the knights templar and conducts commerce in the holy roman empire*
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Aug 23, 2017 17:26
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I claim de jure on this thread
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Aug 23, 2017 17:28
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That Robot posted:*lols as a jester falls into a pit of manure and drowns in it*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:02
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Over There posted:I claim de jure on this thread I claim droit du seigneur on this thread
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Aug 23, 2017 18:03
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i declare the right of prima nocta 
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Aug 23, 2017 18:13
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*spends long summer tannin' hides* *dies of tuberculosis*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:24
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*eats slightly moldy bread* *dies in utter agony from St. Anthony's fire*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:30
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People are always saying that serfs had the poo poo end of the stick but if they got paid for raising veggies, what are they going to actually do with those dollars? It's not like they could run down to the 7-11 and buy a case of Coke or a pack of smokes. That poo poo wasn't invented yet!
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Aug 23, 2017 18:36
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Foxe Newes 90% of "poor" households have wooden spoons.
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Aug 23, 2017 18:39
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*devotes life to mastering the sword* *dies from the plague*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:41
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*Raped + pillaged by Vikings*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:44
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My lord, I am but a humble servant of the crown. Please stop having intercourse with my wife, daughter and son, sire
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Aug 23, 2017 18:45
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That Robot posted:i declare the right of prima nocta That's the same thing I said you rank peasant
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Aug 23, 2017 18:46
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Aug 23, 2017 18:48
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walgreenslatino posted:That's the same thing I said you rank peasant *rolls a wooden wheel with a stick for amusement*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:49
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Honey, I don't have a Prima Nocta fetish, don't be silly! Im just saying that maybe we can find a black king somewhere.
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Aug 23, 2017 18:49
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 hey guys, what's going on?
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Aug 23, 2017 18:52
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That Robot posted:*rolls a wooden wheel with a stick for amusement* 
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Aug 23, 2017 18:52
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Im a merchant and eh im gonna unload a bunch of rats from the orient. Nothing bad will happen.
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Aug 23, 2017 18:53
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*has loads and loads of sex* *has lots of children* *puts them to work in the fields* *gets drunk all day* *does nothing all year until harvest time*
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Aug 23, 2017 18:53
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Need just the right kind of beer for breakfast.
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Aug 23, 2017 18:55
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I did some googlin on medieval torture and boy howdy did we like to destroy eachother back then. Reminds me of ISIS and how they basically torture and kill people in new inventive ways for seemingly no other reason than because they can Society breaking down = apparently we turn to ultraviolence for our primary means of entertainment
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Aug 23, 2017 18:56
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Fartbox posted:Society breaking down = apparently we turn to ultraviolence for our primary means of entertainment
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Aug 23, 2017 18:58
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Fartbox posted:Society breaking down = apparently we turn to ultraviolence for our primary means of entertainment lol we do that even if society isn't breaking down
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Aug 23, 2017 19:02
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gently caress now that they plague killed so many we have to pay the peasants more. haha jk we can just fix the prices for everything and then butcher them when they rise up.
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Aug 23, 2017 19:03
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The serfs keep moving to church lands because I am a cruel, miserly, and sexually maladjusted lord.
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Aug 23, 2017 19:10
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*is german; calls collection of territories "The Holy Roman Empire" to fool rubes; does not give a single gently caress about Constantinople and lets idiots sack it during the fourth crusade* lol suck on that byzantines *completes land transfers by handing over dirt and some sticks*
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Aug 23, 2017 19:17
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No one expects the Spanish Inquisition
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Aug 23, 2017 19:38
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*Hopes future people don't take into account all the dead babies due to our high infant mortality when they calculate our medieval lifespans*
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Aug 23, 2017 19:46
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