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Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Serena is still bunning in her oven. Djokovic and Wawrinka shut down their seasons. Murray's hip is still broken. And while Nadal is seeded #1, Murray had 5 more ranking points than Federer and Federer ended up in Nadal's half, so we won't get a repeat Fedal final like the Australian Open. Murray withdrew 2 days before the tourney like a bitch rear end oval office, ruining the draw.

In other words, nobody will watch this trash garbage, and Federer will win his 20th slam at age 36. But he definitely doesn't dope.


http://www.usopen.org/index.html

TV coverage is on ESPN/ESPN2/WatchESPN. The US Open also has complete radio coverage available on their website and app.


Draws
TBA


Top 8 Men's Betting Favorites
Roger Federer 7/4
Rafael Nadal 3/1
Alexander Zverev 11/2
Andy Murray 13/2
Grigor Dimitrov 16/1
Nick Kyrgios 16/1
Marin Cilic 18/1
Dominic Thiem 25/1


Top 8 Women's Betting Favorites
Garbine Muguruza 4/1
Karolina Pliskova 6/1
Elina Svitolina 8/1
Johanna Konta 10/1
Simona Halep 10/1
Madison Keys 12/1
Venus Williams 18/1
Angelique Kerber 20/1
Caroline Wozniacki 20/1
Jelena Ostapenko 20/1
Maria Sharapova 20/1

Josh Lyman fucked around with this message at 23:32 on Aug 26, 2017

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Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Holy gently caress her index finger :gonk: :nms:

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Resonance posted:

Murray has withdrawn, arf.
What a cock. Fed ended up in Nadal's half and now the draw is ruined.

Sodium Chloride posted:

Oh for fucks sake Andy, you and your crappy hip.

Can't wait for Halep to lose to Sharapova again.
I have Sharapova making the quarters in my bracket.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


I've got a sweet parlay going. 5 legs are pretty easy, Cibulkova/Konta/Stephens winning and Muguruza/Wozniacki winning in straights.

The last leg is Sharapova beating Halep, which she's done all 6 times they've played. But Sharapova has only played 1 match since her doping ban and Halep made the semifinals in Toronto and finals in Cincinnati. :ohdear:

If I becoming a degenerate gambler, blame Mayweather vs. McGregor.

edit: Konta in the 3rd and down a break though. I thought Krunic could be a tough match if she plays well, but I thought if I went to a third, Konta's quality would come though. :negative:

Josh Lyman fucked around with this message at 20:44 on Aug 28, 2017

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Sodium Chloride posted:

Did you see those matches? Halep collapsed like a bad soufflé in both of them. She didn't even turn up against Mugu. Her confidence must be shot.
Yeah, that's why I made the bet. She's a headcase. But Sharapova could just lose the match on unforced errors.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


LOOOL I cannot believe I lost my $800 parlay on loving Konta, a 9-1 favorite who I didn't even really want to include.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Osaka over Kerber was the only underdog pick I made for today's parlay. You could see it coming from a mile away.

The other legs were Karlovic, Gasquet, Vandeweghe and Keys, but the first 3 are on outside courts and this loving rain. :argh:

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


oliwan posted:

What Tiafoek happened there?
GOATerer is too olderer

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Tsonga is trash garbage. He's basically a nice Kyrgios.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Pliskova lost the 1st set 6-2 to Nicole "ranked 127 in the world" Gibbs.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Fed drops the 2nd set to Youzhny in a tiebreak after winning the first 6-1.

Fed is 16-0 against Youzhny.

Did he expend too much energy in his 1R match? It's looking that way.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Rafa and Sharapova gonna win it all

US Dopen

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


That match was BS. Fed should have lost.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


If you're not watching Bouchard/Ostapenko playing doubles, what are you doing with your life? :colbert:

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Glare Seethe posted:

Some nice matches on the women's side in the 4th round, on paper at least. Kvitova v Muguruza should hopefully be good if Petra plays the way she did today, and Georges v Sloane as well, both of them playing great and are legitimate dark horses.
Goerges is a servebot who doesn't even have that good of a serve. Sloane should wipe the floor with her.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Sodium Chloride posted:

He called the female umpire a cocksucking whore.
I don't think Flavia Pennetta is going to appreciate that.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Jack's Flow posted:

This could end up costing him a lot more than just his current $24,000 fine:
Call an umpire a cocksucking whore, get banned from all slams.

Tell an linesman "I swear to God I'll loving take the ball and shove it down your loving throat" and you get praised as the GOAT.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Sodium Chloride posted:

Now that Mayer is crumbling can we just shove them off court so we can get to the night session.
Rumors were that Fed might not even come out tonight. I expect the match to go 5 and Lopez might even win.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Just lol if you aren't watching Kvitova/Mugurza, probably gonna be the best match of the tourney.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Sodium Chloride posted:

I guess this is why Murray waited so long before withdrawing. He must be really hurting if he thought he couldn't beat these chucklefucks.
He knew he was gonna lose to Roger or Rafa. Probably sponsors and stuff kept him in for so long, maybe he USTA too.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


I am president of the Petra Kvitova fan club :allears:

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Sodium Chloride posted:

Federer had an off court medical time out. His back maybe?

e: He needed his butt rubbed.
Don't forget to activate your glutes.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Just lol if you aren't watching Fed/Delpo right now.

Good start so far.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Glare Seethe posted:

At this point I'd take a Delpo/Anderson final to be honest... but I worry we'll get Nadal/Carreno Busta instead.
Yeah Nadal/PCB would be 6-1 6-2 6-2

Josh Lyman fucked around with this message at 04:37 on Sep 7, 2017

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


ChaosReaper posted:

Yea I don't think Del Po can take out Thiem, Fed, and Nadal in a row. Guess Nadal is gonna get him a US Open again.
The main problem is that Nadal can abuse Delpo's BH like he used to with Fed.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Cornflakes posted:

lol delpo is gonna beat fed and nadal only to lose to kevin loving anderson :vuvu:
Nah, if Delpo can get through Nadal (he won't), Ando is gonna get nervous and before he knows it be 2 sets down.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


I'm tearing up you guys. Delpo for the motherfucking win

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Both players are mental midgets. Coco TRUMP Vandeweghe gonna win the whole thing.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Cornflakes posted:

all these commentators trying to hype up Sloane, I can't take it
Sloane is basically black Wozniacki, but because she has good muscle definition and the legacy of the Williams sisters, everyone assumes she's a power player.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Coco is a piece of poo poo Trump supporter and I'm glad she got embarrassed.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


If Sloane wins, every mainstream publication is gonna be calling her Serena 2.0.

Which is ridiculous if for no other reason than having opposite playing styles.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


First slam for Under Armour.

Can't wait for the ads with Sloane and Jordan Spieth

j/k UA would never piss off their golf market with a black woman

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


"It's impossible"

I don't know Sloane, did you watch the loving Super Bowl? 28-3 in the 4th quarter???????????

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Sodium Chloride posted:

First from a woman. Andy Murray won a slam in UA 2016.
Muzzah has been so poo poo this year that I completely forgot about that

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Cornflakes posted:

The worst was that horrible interlude where they talked to Billie Jean King and Emma Stone about the battle of the sexes movie during the effing match
It isn't even being distributed by a Disney subsidiary but Fox Searchlight.

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


TO THE OSHEEEUN

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


LOL at Rafa's return position. Ando should just serve wide every point if Rafa is gonna stand 15 feet back.

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Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009


Tacier posted:

I see no reason for players like Anderson not to practice and employ an underhanded dink serve a la Michael Chang when Nadal is returning from 30 feet behind the baseline. No shame.
Don't you get the sense that Nadal could make it to an underhand serve even from that far back?

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