HOURS AWAY: NCAA Week 1 Beforemath: Prelude to a Kick

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > HOURS AWAY: NCAA Week 1 Beforemath: Prelude to a Kick

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Dilber: Mar 27, 2007; TFLC
_{_{(Trophy Feline Lifting Crew)}}

D.N. Nation posted:

Not impossible at all that FSU starts 1-2 with losses to Bama and the Fightin' Richts. Loss to Bama alone wouldn't knock them out, though.

My vote's on OU after getting blasted week 2 in Columbus.

I'm down for scenario 1.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:32

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# ? May 5, 2024 01:48

Komet: Apr 4, 2003

Sash! posted:

This is the sixth meeting between Penn State and Akron. Akron has never come closer than an 18 point loss and been outscored 204 to 60, yielding an average score of 41-12. Working in Akron's favor is that Penn State has declined from scoring 70 in 1999 to just 21 in 2014. In fact, Penn State has scored fewer points in every meeting. However, so has Akron, going from 24 to 3. The last two meetings had a combined score of 52-10.

In conclusion, Akron isn't very good and it is a slow day at work.

Over/under on 100 yard rushers for Penn State in this game: 2

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:32

I. M. Gei: Jun 26, 2005; CHIEFS

BITCH

buddhanc posted:

Bevo is going to make friends with a nice turtle who will chill on his back.

And then we'll crush some guys on the field

Go a Texas

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:35

LeeMajors: Jan 20, 2005; I've gotta stop fantasizing about Lee Majors...
Ah, one more!

D.N. Nation posted:

It made sense in 2007 because that team only really got good the second half of the season. This paradigm would have the Dawgs winning at ND and UT, beating Florida in the Cocktail Party, probably being Top 5 at this point, then coming home and annihilating their own foot against Will Muschamp.

This would be unimpeachably the most UGA thing ever, which is why it's gonna happen I guess

I think the most unimpeachably UGA thing is losing to UF over and over again in agonizing and embarrassing fashion, but your scenario runs a close second.

Also, I want to feel confident against Michigan because they lost a lot of players but A) I'll believe our offense has a pulse when I see it and B) I still have PTSD from watching Henne destroy us with slants in 2007 and Harbaugh destroying us two years ago.

LeeMajors fucked around with this message at 20:42 on Aug 28, 2017

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:37

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

ESPN says the sperger and the shark fucker are having a pissing contest over not releasing rosters.

quote:

ANN ARBOR, Mich. -- Michigan's Jim Harbaugh and Florida's Jim McElwain may be in the middle of a silent standoff about their depth charts ahead of Saturday's meeting at AT&T Stadium, but they are not holding their tongues long enough to avoid a few barbs.

Harbaugh said Monday that he knows who will start at quarterback when No. 11 Michigan plays No. 17 Florida in Texas to start their seasons, but he has no plans to reveal that information before the Gators show their hand.

"I have not heard Florida announce who their starting quarterback will be, and we'd love to have that information," Harbaugh said. "So we're not announcing a starting quarterback."

Harbaugh has come under a bit of fire this month for not releasing a new version of Michigan's roster. The school's website hasn't updated the list of current players since August 2016. McElwain took a poke at his opponent last week when he asked reporters to give him a heads-up when they got a roster, so he could figure out who would be playing.

On Monday, McElwain was asked what he thought of some of Harbaugh's "antics," which keep the Wolverines -- and their coach -- on college football's center stage in the spring and summer. This year, Harbaugh took his team to Rome for a week of spring practice, completed his second expansive tour of satellite camps and connected with famous folks from many walks of life on social media.

"He obviously felt he needed to do some things to be relevant, and that's his choice," McElwain told reporters in Gainesville on Monday. "I probably wouldn't have done it."

Harbaugh said he didn't understand the criticism he has heard about Michigan's lack of a roster.

"People make a lot of, [they make a] big deal about our roster and announcing our quarterback," he said. "I have not seen a starting quarterback for Florida, and no one really mentions that."

Harbaugh said in mid-August that incumbent starter Wilton Speight and fifth-year senior John O'Korn had separated themselves from the rest of Michigan's quarterbacks in a competition for the starting job. Speight won nine games in his first year leading the offense last year. O'Korn, who started his career at Houston, won his only start in a Michigan uniform in November against Indiana when Speight injured his shoulder.

McElwain said Monday that his staff has a quarterback plan for Saturday's game but that he wants Michigan to have to prepare for several potential looks. Graduate transfer Malik Zaire gives the Gators a running threat; his competitors for the starting job, Luke Del Rio and Feleipe Franks, lean toward the pro-style, pocket-passer mold.

Florida and Michigan crossed paths at the end of McElwain's and Harbaugh's first seasons at their respective schools. The Wolverines "dominated" the Gators, according to McElwain, in a 41-7 victory at the Citrus Bowl that ended the 2015 season.

Kickoff for their rematch is scheduled for 3:30 p.m. ET Saturday in Arlington, Texas.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:40

Komet: Apr 4, 2003

I take it you are referring to Harbaugh. I've been away all offseason. What's this about sharks.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:42

RumbleFish: Dec 20, 2007

Mike_V posted:

Mizzou and Drew Lock are gonna funsling all over Southwest Missouri State on Saturday.

I really miss having cupcake season openers. It sucks stressing about playing a Power 5 team right off the bat.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:44

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Komet posted:

I take it you are referring to Harbaugh. I've been away all offseason. What's this about sharks.

Jim McElwain may or may not have drunk and nakedly humped a shark on a fishing boat....and allowed a picture to be taken

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:44

D.N. Nation: Feb 1, 2012

LeeMajors posted:

I think the most unimpeachably UGA thing is losing to UF over and over again in agonizing and embarrassing fashion, but your scenario runs a close second.

The current most UGA thing ever was 2014 Georgia getting obliterated by Florida, so you're right there.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:44

Randaconda: Jul 3, 2014; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Dilber posted:

I'm down for scenario 1.

calm down, spicy boi

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:44

Randaconda: Jul 3, 2014; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

LeeMajors posted:

I think the most unimpeachably UGA thing is losing to UF over and over again in agonizing and embarrassing fashion, but your scenario runs a close second.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:45

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PA8P9XjKwYc

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:47

Mr. World: May 6, 2007; Working undercover for the man . . .

I just looked at the line for Texas/Maryland. Texas being be favored by 18 points is a bit rich. New offensive and defensive system and losing their top rusher? Maryland is bad but they're not that bad.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:50

Pakled: Aug 6, 2011; WE ARE SMART

FizFashizzle posted:

I'll be there Monday fam

Hell yeah man :respek:

I won't be there unfortunately but yeah

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:50

Regnevelc: Jan 12, 2003; I'M A GROWN ASS MAN!

FizFashizzle posted:

Jim McElwain may or may not have drunk and nakedly humped a shark on a fishing boat....and allowed a picture to be taken

Nah, he totally did.

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:53

Drunk Canuck: Jan 9, 2010; Robots ruin all the fun of a good adventure.

Go Irish

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:56

the mean lunch lady: Jun 24, 2009; went mad at sea
lots were drawn
Kroenke didn't survive
he was delicious

I hope Mizzou annihilates Missouri State. I hate that hoosier rear end school so much.

Unfortunately, since Odom and Steckel are buddies, that probably won't happen :smith:

# ? Aug 28, 2017 20:57

AsInHowe: Jan 11, 2007; red winged angel

FizFashizzle posted:

Jim McElwain drunk and nakedly humped a shark on a fishing boat....and allowed a picture to be taken

# ? Aug 28, 2017 21:00

MourningView: Sep 2, 2006; Is this Heaven?

https://twitter.com/owhbigred/status/902233843423424512

Team literally named the cornhuskers upset about being associated with corn

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:09

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮

Focus on the other things associated with Nebraska, like FILE NOT FOUND

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:14

Duckaerobics: Jul 22, 2007; Lipstick Apathy

FizFashizzle posted:

Georgia Vs Tennessee

I prefer this version.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2bMEyauBeU

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:24

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Duckaerobics posted:

I prefer this version.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2bMEyauBeU

is he the one who did a video calling out all the trolls who said he wouldn't destroy his own tv, THEN HE PROVED THEM WRONG

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:30

Pakled: Aug 6, 2011; WE ARE SMART

FizFashizzle posted:

is he the one who did a video calling out all the trolls who said he wouldn't destroy his own tv, THEN HE PROVED THEM WRONG

Yup

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnAgP1okKdQ

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:31

Duckaerobics: Jul 22, 2007; Lipstick Apathy

FizFashizzle posted:

is he the one who did a video calling out all the trolls who said he wouldn't destroy his own tv, THEN HE PROVED THEM WRONG

Yes. He didn't break his TV during this game, the cord just came out. The loss to Tech is what put him over the edge, and he smashes the TV.
edit:beaten

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:34

Joey Freshwater: Jun 20, 2004; Always playing with my meat; Grimey Drawer

FizFashizzle posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PA8P9XjKwYc

Duckaerobics posted:

I prefer this version.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2bMEyauBeU

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:39

Spacebump: Dec 24, 2003; Dallas Mavericks: Generations

Last week I hyped up a Nebraska fan on Tanner Lee. What have I done?

MourningView posted:

https://twitter.com/owhbigred/status/902233843423424512

Team literally named the cornhuskers upset about being associated with corn

lol

# ? Aug 28, 2017 22:46

Duckaerobics: Jul 22, 2007; Lipstick Apathy

LSU BYU game officially moved to New Orleans.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 00:07

pillsburysoldier: Feb 11, 2008; Yo, peep that shit

Oh god, Francois is rocking a man bun

we're so doomed

# ? Aug 29, 2017 00:08

MourningView: Sep 2, 2006; Is this Heaven?

Spacebump posted:

Last week I hyped up a Nebraska fan on Tanner Lee. What have I done?

lol

They do not need to be hyped on tanner lee there is already a huge segment of the fanbase that will happily tell you that he's the next Peyton Manning because he had a good camp throwing in shorts and be furious if you suggest otherwise.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 00:08

Thermos H Christ: Sep 6, 2007; WINNINGEST BEVO

Texas is probably going to start 2-0 and then play USC in a megahyped night game, should be fun!

# ? Aug 29, 2017 00:11

Spacebump: Dec 24, 2003; Dallas Mavericks: Generations

MourningView posted:

They do not need to be hyped on tanner lee there is already a huge segment of the fanbase that will happily tell you that he's the next Peyton Manning because he had a good camp throwing in shorts and be furious if you suggest otherwise.

It's hard to know if he is good or bad despite having watched every game he played at Tulane. Sometimes he would make a needle threading throw where you'd think "WOW, Why is this guy at Tulane?" Then he'd try to repeat that throw the rest of the game and turn into a turnover machine. It could be because Tulane's previous coaching staff was bad at offensive play calling and the line crumbled quickly. However, sometimes he did have other much more open receivers to throw to.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 00:28

an adult beverage: Aug 13, 2005; 1,2,3,4,5 dem gators don't take no jive. go gator -US Rep. Corrine Brown (D) FL

just lol @ the preseason Georgia hype. Gonna go 7-5, book it. Quote this post in 4 months

# ? Aug 29, 2017 01:06

Henchman of Santa: Aug 21, 2010

I just realized I arrive in New Orleans during the Michigan game this year. I am definitely trying absinthe that day.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 01:12

Scionix: Oct 17, 2009; hoog emm xDDD

an adult beverage posted:

just lol @ the preseason Georgia hype. Gonna go 7-5, book it. Quote this post in 4 months

i mean is it really dunking on them at this point

ever since that 2008 blackout game theyve been broken

# ? Aug 29, 2017 01:48

an adult beverage: Aug 13, 2005; 1,2,3,4,5 dem gators don't take no jive. go gator -US Rep. Corrine Brown (D) FL

I'm not even trying to dunk on em. It's loving depressing how bad the SECEast has been since Urbz left.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 01:55

Komet: Apr 4, 2003

Spacebump posted:

It's hard to know if he is good or bad despite having watched every game he played at Tulane. Sometimes he would make a needle threading throw where you'd think "WOW, Why is this guy at Tulane?" Then he'd try to repeat that throw the rest of the game and turn into a turnover machine. It could be because Tulane's previous coaching staff was bad at offensive play calling and the line crumbled quickly. However, sometimes he did have other much more open receivers to throw to.

So Christian Hackenberg then

# ? Aug 29, 2017 02:09

DJExile: Jun 28, 2007

a reminder for those who forgot the definition of roll tide

# ? Aug 29, 2017 02:11

RumbleFish: Dec 20, 2007

an adult beverage posted:

just lol @ the preseason Georgia hype. Gonna go 7-5, book it. Quote this post in 4 months

It would rule if Kirby was somehow an even worse version of Muschamp. Hell, all he needs to do is "only" win 9-10 games a season and UGA will can him anyway.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 02:21

Vertical Lime: Dec 11, 2004

https://twitter.com/SimonOstler/status/902340111647559680

now he can go back to hell

# ? Aug 29, 2017 02:24

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# ? May 5, 2024 01:48

LeeMajors: Jan 20, 2005; I've gotta stop fantasizing about Lee Majors...
Ah, one more!

RumbleFish posted:

It would rule if Kirby was somehow an even worse version of Muschamp. Hell, all he needs to do is "only" win 9-10 games a season and UGA will can him anyway.

Like, a better recruiter but still somehow worse.

Like Ray Goof 2.0.

# ? Aug 29, 2017 02:25

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > HOURS AWAY: NCAA Week 1 Beforemath: Prelude to a Kick

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