Kitchen Gadgets Megathread: Those are Toxins Shooting Out of Your Anus

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Kitchen Gadgets Megathread: Those are Toxins Shooting Out of Your Anus

Instruction Manuel: May 15, 2007; Yes, it is what it looks like!

Juicero 2.0

https://boingboing.net/2018/01/02/pathogenic-capitalism.html

"The guy whose DRM for juice company cratered last year now sells "raw water" packed with all the microbes and amoebas you can stomach"

# ¿ Jan 5, 2018 22:57

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 12:21

Instruction Manuel: May 15, 2007; Yes, it is what it looks like!

Beet Wagon posted:

lmao apparently they sell that poo poo for like $60 a gallon.

http://www.businessinsider.de/silicon-valley-raw-water-obsession-2018-1?r=US&IR=T

Clearly I got into the wrong line of work.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46iPFTCZ9LA

No kidding, I almost wish I had zero scruples and didn't mind fleecing people.

# ¿ Jan 7, 2018 12:54

Instruction Manuel: May 15, 2007; Yes, it is what it looks like!

Beet Wagon posted:

Have you ever wondered how important the OXYGEN is?

So, we've all been there. You're getting ready to go on a hike, bike ride, or some other sort of eco-friendly physical activity, but gosh darn it, all these drat oxygen tanks keep getting in the way! You can't not take supplemental oxygen, but you also need room for your water bottles, sports bars, and vintage Kodak camera! Well, never fear, my intrepid millenial friends, AQUOGEN is here to help!

AQUOGEN is a two-part water-bottle-and-supplemental-oxygen device that will not only allow you to hydrate, but will blast UP TO 25 BREATHS (PER REFILL CANISTER) OF ENRICHED OXYGEN at your face, so you can pretend it's helping you breathe better while it immediately dissipates into the dirty air between your nose and the bottle.

https://ksr-video.imgix.net/projects/1942730/video-817246-h264_high.mp4

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/892169180/aquogen-water-and-breathable-oxygen-on-the-go

Seriously, apparently these guys think that this is a real thing people need or want.

you're at a constant lookout for clean oxygen in the air.

Yeah that's definitely true, I'm constantly sorting through all this air trying to suss out the clean oxygen from the rest of it.

Also, in case you were wondering, no, of course there's no accompanying mask to ensure you get the oxygen, YOU IDIOT. JUST POINT THAT poo poo AT YOUR FACE AND LET FLY!

Oh neat, looks like they got Mel Brooks to endorse this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzbIrb7LUJA

# ¿ Jan 16, 2018 03:24

Instruction Manuel: May 15, 2007; Yes, it is what it looks like!

Hav posted:

From one of their patents. That's not what exponential means.

http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-...7&RS=PN/6094917

Lol if you're not smoking a bunch of larva rolled in paper with minimal tobacco.

# ¿ Jan 19, 2018 01:03

Instruction Manuel: May 15, 2007; Yes, it is what it looks like!

Quad dogs piled high...

# ¿ Jan 30, 2018 15:03

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 12:21

Instruction Manuel: May 15, 2007; Yes, it is what it looks like!

Beet Wagon posted:

Says you, I've been freezing all day. It's in the sixties for God's sake!

# ¿ Feb 9, 2018 19:34

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