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PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011

as promised, here is the list of figgies . although it is official, it is a living document that can change and be updated. however i am the sole authority on it. thank you.

5 figgies - between 10k and 40k

5 figgies with all cheevos - 40k to 55k

wordpress themer figgies - 55k to 75k

lyin' rear end figgies - you were fired more than 2 weeks ago but haven't told your SO.

6 figgies - $100,000 to $200,000

quarter mill figgies - 200k to 250k

cocaine figgies - it doesn't matter how much you make cause it all goes to cocaine. you sleep 3 hours a night and stalk the tumblrs of 18 year olds.

bitcoin figgies - you sleep in your license plate-free car most nights except when your friend "buster" lets you sleep in a vacant room at the hotel he manages. you promise to repay him in full.

gimme tax relief figgies - 250k to 400k

capitalist figgies - profit is the stolen wages of the working class, and any who subsist off of this surplus labour deserve only a swift death.

to be continued

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PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011

you are thinking of some one else dumb rear end

PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011

Roosevelt posted:

kevin are you going to tend to your thread, or just poo poo out an op and abandon us to wonder about figgies. this brings me displeasure

50% chance i’ll get more cocaine and keep posting. 50% chance i’ll kill my self and this will be the last of the Great Works posted to this site.

PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011

The Management posted:

your mapping has a hole between $75k and $100k. I suggest aspirational six figgies

maybe six figgies-adjacent

all of this takes an enormous amount of work. i’m currently collecting primary data to determine the range of “family court figgies “

PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011

Fiedler posted:

Figgies is total annual compensation, including 401k match, and excluding unvested stock grants and the value of benefits (e.g. health coverage).

it’s 2017 those don’t exist

poty posted:

yeah substance abuse doesnt fix anything and killing yourself is really dumb. especially for a weak rear end problem like losing your job

everyone on this web site knows my problems go way back

spankmeister posted:

we need a breakdown of deece, p. deece and 0.5 of a figgy, and all combinations thereof

i have tried to avoid the big questions such as these. take this cup from thee, father.

akadajet posted:

kevin's twitter currently has men drinking piss on it. :thunk:

you don’t recognize MEN ENJOYING PASTA

big scary monsters posted:

i have reassessed this thread and upgraded my previous 1 vtoe to a cautious 2

hope that brings you some small pleasure, kevin

you have absolutely no idea

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