Bitcoin: no angel investors, only Faustian bargains

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Bitcoin: no angel investors, only Faustian bargains

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

People want bitcoin to be the new currency but the only value it has is value from another currency when you sell

Seems problematic

# ¿ Oct 24, 2017 01:55

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 21:13

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Buy my tulips

# ¿ Oct 25, 2017 22:09

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

He's owning that guy who made an ebook and is making real money selling it on Amazon

https://www.amazon.com/Attack-50-Foot-Blockchain-Contracts-ebook/dp/B073CPP581

# ¿ Oct 26, 2017 00:54

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

It's funny that the only value for bitcoin is the selling value in another currency

# ¿ Oct 31, 2017 18:33

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

vortmax posted:

Okay so Hammy said Subway takes bitscoin, so I went to the one by my store and ordered my favorite footlong. But when I asked to pay in bit coins, they had no idea what I was talking about. Not even the manager knew. But I could pay with PayPal, so I did that.

What gives, Hammy? Does Subway take the buttcoins or not?

No you see you need to convert the bitcoins into PayPal or real money and THEN subway will accept them!

See how disruptful this currency is? Hopefully your currency doesn't drop in value while you wait for the transaction to go through!

# ¿ Nov 1, 2017 14:29

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Return Of JimmyJars posted:

If everyone tried to cash out of the stock market at once they would lose their value!! STOCKS ARE A SCAM!!

Can you pay Subway with DOW JONES stock? I thought not.

# ¿ Nov 1, 2017 16:53

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Why the hell would an AI need bitcoin?

# ¿ Nov 1, 2017 22:20

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

vortmax posted:

Hammy is just so angry about that.

The true value is in defending bitcoin for some reason

# ¿ Nov 10, 2017 15:45

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

think of all the steam games and computer parts you can buy

# ¿ Nov 10, 2017 18:45

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

just bought a footlong sub with bitcoins today

# ¿ Nov 10, 2017 20:52

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

univbee posted:

76,342
76,342 Satoshi
76,342 Satoshi footloooooooog

Hmmm, I think this ad will need some adjusting.

Going from Subway to Bitcoin was much easier than Jared anticipated

# ¿ Nov 10, 2017 21:32

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Uranium 235 posted:

to make another running analogy

if i tell someone about how i run a few times a week and am training for a 10K and hope to beat my personal best time, do i have to explicitly state "i am not a professional runner" for them to understand that i'm a hobby runner?

likewise, if i tell you that i started trading a small amount and then added some more and now trade in my spare time to earn extra money, do i have to explicitly state "i am not a professional trader" for you to understand that i'm a hobby trader?

before talking to you, i would think the answer is obviously "no"

i don't say that i invest in bitcoin because trading and investing are two distinct ideas and sets of behavior. what i do is trading

https://www.investopedia.com/ask/answers/12/difference-investing-trading.asp

You are a professional if someone else pays for your work

# ¿ Nov 10, 2017 22:32

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

tell him he better start cashing his billions out now

if times it right by the time he cashes out the first billion the remaining leftovers will be worth another billion due to the slow transaction speeds

# ¿ Nov 11, 2017 17:26

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

Lol everyone that posted during the fork drama about how bitcoins were CRASHING

extra lol at "coins can no longer be updated because ASICS" and people dumb enough to believe it

well done dudes, you sure called this one just like the iphone / anroid big hands thing - NOBODY WILL NEED A PHONE BIGGER THAN THE IPHONE 4 STEVE JOBS HIMSELF SAID SO

No one does need the bigger phones, they just made all the new ones big

like if you don't get a choice it doesn't mean you liked it

# ¿ Nov 15, 2017 22:44

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

Haha imagine being this unable to predict the future and obvious trends

and then feeling the need to stake out your obvious correct position on bitcoin

Sorry luddites & morons, it must be rough being unable to extend out trendlines or draw obvious conclusions about how things are going

Hmm it seems our phone sales are going down on phone sizes we no longer make, I wonder why?

# ¿ Nov 15, 2017 22:48

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

That's so weird that IT janitors with woke CGA avatars could possibly be wrong and dumb about technology trends despite working in it all day? And spend years making fun of the very thing that was about to happen. How could this be?! Maybe if they had self published a book about big phones it would have been different.

are you doing okay today

# ¿ Nov 15, 2017 22:58

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

Lmao this broken clock isn't even right twice a day but he's here to give you advice on cryptocurrencies

I asked if you were doing okay because you keep responding to me like I'm someone else and you are taking things really personally

Getting serious for a moment I'm asking if you are doing okay mentally because it doesn't sound like it, you really have a "me against the world" type thing going on, like we are all sysadmins from yospos. It's a sign of schizophrenia, please take it seriously.

# ¿ Nov 16, 2017 17:53

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

Yeah this is genuinely hosed up, the posts you and Fried Watermelon are making here are genuinely bullshit and make me think a lot less of both of you.

[edit]And Gumbel2Gumbel

I guess it's my mistake for thinking about you at all

# ¿ Nov 16, 2017 19:09

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

Oh dude, you don't like being called out on your garbage behavior to strangers on the internet who disagree with you?

Do you not understand why people are concerned with your mental health?

You keep mentioning random events and scenarios, like iPhones being larger, YOSPOS, and sysadmins. When you mention these and attribute these to people who call you mentally unwell WHO HAVE NEVER SAID OR MENTIONED THEM (please point out where I say I'm a sysadmin or show me a post I've made on YOSPOS, I only mentioned the phones after YOU brought them up). This makes you look mentally unwell, it's not garbage behaviour to point this out to people, how would you be able to fix your health if no one pointed it out?

Please get therapy, not everyone is a large phone hating sysadmin from YOSPOS.

# ¿ Nov 17, 2017 17:46

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

It is now official. Netcraft has confirmed: Bitcoin is dying

One more crippling bombshell hit the already beleaguered Bitcoin community when IDC confirmed that Bitcoin market share has dropped yet again, now down to less than a fraction of 1 percent of all currency. Coming on the heels of a recent Netcraft survey which plainly states that Bitcoin has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. Bitcoin is collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by failing dead last [samag.com] in the recent Sys Admin comprehensive networking test.

You don't need to be the Amazing Kreskin [amazingkreskin.com] to predict Bitcoin's future. The hand writing is on the wall: "Bitcoin faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Bitcoin because Bitcoin is dying. Things are looking very bad for Bitcoin. As many of us are already aware, Bitcoin continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood.

Coinbase is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of its core developers. Their email verification doesn't even work, and the website is dogshit. There can no longer be any doubt: Bitcoin is dying.

lol

# ¿ Dec 4, 2017 21:44

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

null posted:

In the year 2020, everyone will own bitcoin instead of USD. Except for the few remaining goon holdouts, who will continue to insist on a coming crash as they are hunted down like dogs by futuristic cyborg killing machines.

in a way they will be the lucky ones

Ham Sandwiches posted:

Why did you pick a post where I wasn't replying to Comrades or talking to him?

Here's what I posted to comrades:

Wow dude, brutal stuff I hope he's ok

The guy I was replying to was being a total rear end and telling me the correct way to respond, mr Goodpancakes, and I called his post mega dumb

Are you having problems following these threads? It seems like that might explain a lot of your posts

nice meltdown

# ¿ Dec 5, 2017 23:26

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Slightly Absurd posted:

Wee, Steam no longer accepts bitcoin!
http://store.steampowered.com/news/

At least I can still buy subway

# ¿ Dec 6, 2017 21:19

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

revwinnebago posted:

I call this, "Coffee and Blockchains."

[Fade from black, we're looking through a window. An obese man wearing glasses and camo is trying to purchase a coffee at a counter. A Neon Sign reads "The Mt. Gox Deli". Cut to the Purveyor standing behind the counter with a friendly smile.]

Purveyor: "One large coffee, with tax that'll be $3.13. Cash or credit?"

Obese Man: (wheezing) "I only pay in Bitcoin."

Purveyor: "No problem. According to our live ticker then, that'll be $25.62."

Obese Man: "This is outrageous! Bitcoin is the next-generation store of value!"

Purveyor: "Of course, sir, but we're just letting you know the processing fee."

[Obese Man nearly knocks the chip reader over with his fat folds as he pays with Android NFC. A beep is heard.]

Purveyor: "Okay and we'll just need to wait for a Chinese miner to verify the blockchain."

[At least three minutes elapse. Another customer gets in line, and there is some humorous body language as the customer realizes what's going on. He and Purveyor silently mock Obese Man, then look away when he almost catches them. A different beep is heard.]

Purveyor: "Oh I'm sorry, your payment went through but the price of Bitcoin has crashed and the fees have skyrocketed, so you still owe us $13."

[Obese man is sweating profusely, he taps his phone again, we hear a beep, and a few minutes elapse. More customers gather, and soon everyone except Obese Man is in on the joke. They all look away, a beat, and the second beep.]

Purveyor: "Ah! I'm sorry. Your payment cleared, but it looks like fluctuations in the market mean you still owe us $5.03."

[The patrons are now hiding side-splitting laughters, someone runs to the bathroom and distant laughing is heard.]

Obese Man: "Excuse me, the Blockchain is the first truly trustworthy system to ever come to banking, it is revolutionary."

Purveyor: "Of course sir, but there is the matter of payment."

[It has been almost 10 minutes since Obese Man entered the shop, and it will have been almost 15 by the time this transaction clears. By this time customers are getting impatient.]

Purveyor: "Ah excellent, it looks like there has been a slight market adjustment and you have now overpaid by $23,405.23! Per the written policy you can see on the sign behind me, we will be keeping this difference and we thank you for your generous tip."

Obese Man: "This is unbelievable! How can you expect to get away with this!?"

Purveyor: "Such a transaction would have been entirely anonymous, sir. Therefore I have no idea what you may or may not be referring to. Next?"

[The next customer in line pays for a coffee in cash. In overlapping dialog the transaction takes all of five seconds, as Obese Man waddles out huffing. Purveyor realizes Obese Man has forgotten his coffee.]

[end scene]

should've bought a ham sandwich imo

# ¿ Dec 6, 2017 22:38

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Well I guess it's time to buy bitcoins now that the train will never end!

# ¿ Dec 7, 2017 17:39

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Hey idiots if you hate bitcoin so much why don't you just buy them!

# ¿ Dec 7, 2017 22:58

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

wide stance posted:

When cherry picking r/bitcoin it must have hurt to see the new cars, people getting out of debt, buying houses, quitting their job to travel year-round, etc.

I suppose those are less authentic than the obvious low-effort FUD shills and crazies.

post the good posts then

# ¿ Dec 10, 2017 22:13

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Bitcoin industry is keeping the graphics card industry artificially high, pricing out the majority of gamers

why aren't bitcoiners mad at this

# ¿ Dec 15, 2017 18:07

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Marketing New Brain posted:

My favorite is how so few people understand marginal tax rates in the U.S. It's always good to make as much money as possible, but people think jumping a tax bracket means their entire income will be taxed at the higher level.

So if the bracket was at $100,000, they'd rather earn $99,999 than $100,001, even though that just means they'd have less money, because they're clueless and think the entire sum would be taxed at an additional x% and not just the last two dollars.

I knew an accountant who thought this and argued with me on this. He changed his tune quick after he got fired for being a poo poo accountant though.

# ¿ Dec 18, 2017 22:52

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Happy Holidays everyone!

# ¿ Dec 22, 2017 18:35

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

everything is alright over at r/bitcoin

# ¿ Dec 22, 2017 18:48

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

# ¿ Dec 22, 2017 19:29

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Knight posted:

Trying to spin watching your account value plummet as "let's see how tough the new guy are" is hilarious. I bet it even works on some of them, gritting their teeth while they lose another mortgage payment in hopes that the group will soon think they're "tough."

They are the true warriors of the day

They know in their old bones that they will come out ahead, because they are the main character and hero and the hero always wins in the end.

All other doubters can GET OUT

# ¿ Dec 22, 2017 19:39

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

ALL money is arbitrary

# ¿ Dec 28, 2017 05:40

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Andy Dufresne posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YagUXXtyFn4

Put this in the OP

# ¿ Jan 19, 2018 18:24

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Gold has only kept it's value because the Anunnaki still use it to power their spaceships for the trip back to Nibiru

# ¿ Jan 22, 2018 18:50

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

I am Satoshi

# ¿ Jan 23, 2018 21:29

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

Just so I'm clear, because like Warren Buffet, I don't understand economics:

1. Bitcoin is really slow and expensive to use for actual transactions (but fine for drugs and illegal stuff);
2. The real value in bitcoin is that people keep buying and selling it, which drives the price higher and higher;
3. People who got in early can cash out for a profit;
4. That profit is gained solely on the backs of people buying late, at a higher price;
5. The only way for the people who bit late to profit is for additional people to buy even later, driving up the price more.

So the only way to profit off bitcoin is necessarily for others to lose money, essentially gambling right? But unlike most gambling, some of late-buyers think they're investing in an asset rather than actually gambling.

It's immoral right? What am I missing gbs?

It's not actually good for drugs, the value of bitcoin fluctuates too much for it to be used for drugs. I believe it's all Monero now

# ¿ Jan 29, 2018 16:27

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

boner confessor posted:

a ton of people who grew up safe and sound in an era of regulation on human economic behavior have completely bought into ridiculous free market propaganda and therefore want to eliminate the regulations which keep them safe and sound

keep in mind that pretty much every government regulation was put in place because someone learned the hard way why that regulation was necessary. not all, but most of them are because someone was killed, injured, or ruined

"i don't need the FDA, i can test my own meat!" cries the libertarian who hasn't poo poo themselves to death in a tenement

They watched Parks and Rec and figured Ron Swanson was always right and is the ideal manly american

They just conveniently ignored all of his failings and mostly agreeing to meet in the middle on any of his schemes

# ¿ Feb 7, 2018 21:47

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KV5QlSgq7lg

# ¿ Mar 15, 2018 03:57

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 21:13

Fried Watermelon: Dec 29, 2008

Is bitcoin good yet?

How much do I buy?

# ¿ May 16, 2018 02:21

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