|
If her dad can afford a better lawyer than you can, you're in deep trouble. You need to get to work right the hell now finding out with reasonable confidence who is the best divorce lawyer in your area and hiring them BEFORE you tell her the bad news. There's no point discussing any of this with us. You need to discuss it all with your lawyer. It will be painfully expensive, but not nearly as expensive as getting your rear end handed to you in divorce court will be. e: you're out of your mind if you don't think she's going to do everything she can to take your rear end to the cleaners in court, by the way. It is going to SUCK. She and her lawyer are going to make outlandish accusations about you being an awful husband and a worse father and you will shoot yourself in both feet, the gut and the head if you respond to that poo poo emotionally rather than strictly 100% through your lawyer. LAWYER UP dude. Eric the Mauve fucked around with this message at 00:18 on Jan 23, 2018 |
#
¿
Jan 23, 2018 00:10
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 21, 2024 21:08 |
|
|
GlyphGryph posted:I wasnt suggesting a permanent 50k a year alimony, I suggested it is a possible starting point for a temporary thing to get her back on her feet as part of a mediation agreement - offering her more up front to reduce the risk of a legal battle where I would have to pay more into perpetuity. Not going to happen, man. Even in the unlikely event she is amenable to such a thing when you have The Conversation with her, the next day she's going to talk to a lawyer and the lawyer is going to say "LOL no, we're going to nail him for alimony AND child support and he's going to give you 60% of his income for the next 15 years." Whether the lawyer can successfully follow through on that will remain to be seen, but it's possible. You're in trouble, the rest of your pre-old-age life is on the line and you'd better act like it. There's drat near nothing I wouldn't do to scrounge up money to pay for a GOOD lawyer here. And your lawyer is 100% going to tell you never to post about your divorce anywhere on the internet again. Every word you post is a discoverable record that can potentially be used against you in court. Your lawyer's going to cringe when you tell them you posted this thread in the first place. Good luck dude 
|
|
#
¿
Jan 23, 2018 02:03
|
|
|
GlyphGryph posted:Should I cash out my 401k, then? Absolutely yes. Guess who's going to get half or more of it anyway?
|
|
#
¿
Jan 23, 2018 02:56
|
|
|
Pretty likely that (at least in OP's opinion) his wife is making the money disappear and it's a prominent reason he wants a divorce, but he probably isn't going to say so in this thread, especially if he's done the only sensible thing and hired a lawyer by now
|
|
#
¿
Jan 23, 2018 19:36
|
|
|
Thanks for the update OP and glad it's relatively good news so far. Just make sure you stay alert and protect yourself as best you can (she can talk to a lawyer and abruptly change her mind at any time) and if you need good advice on buying a car there's a thread in this very forum for the purpose.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 6, 2018 15:24
|
|
|
Yeah, just piling on here but whatever's in your retirement account she's going to get (at least) half of anyway, whereas if you take on debt you get to keep it all. So you might as well spend the retirement savings on the lawyer(s).
|
|
#
¿
Feb 23, 2018 13:44
|
|
|
Because giving her half of it will cost him more than the early withdrawal penalty will. I Am Not A Lawyer nor a financial planner though so I could be missing something. Hope you're doing okay OP!
|
|
#
¿
Mar 31, 2018 22:21
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 21, 2024 21:08 |
|
|
Ah, yeah I think I take your meaning--if it goes to divorce court and it comes up that he cleaned out his 401k to pay his lawyer the judge is going to say "LOL, don't care if you already spent that money, it was a joint asset so you owe her half of it anyway. Before accounting for the withdrawal penalty." So yeah that's a pretty big thing I missed, I'd say
|
|
#
¿
Apr 1, 2018 00:39
|
|