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SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.



She's the witch of WHAT?!



The Witch's Enclosure


The witch of falling over due to impractical clothing.

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berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.
RIP Best Character. Despite the bad music.

CirclMastr
Jul 4, 2010

At least they died doing what they loved...

Giving items to the party. Though I guess we don't get the sword as equipment now.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
So they gave you an instakill spear, and then to balance it out they gave the boss like a 95% autododge?

Ratoslov
Feb 15, 2012

Now prepare yourselves! You're the guests of honor at the Greatest Kung Fu Cannibal BBQ Ever!

Little known fact: you can build i-frames out of rocks.

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

SelenicMartian posted:

...
The witch of falling over due to impractical clothing.

Sure she's not the witch of falling out of her clothing? Because magic is the only explanation I have for that improbable vertical boob-strap getup :eyepop:

Kibayasu
Mar 28, 2010

With all these quasi-torture attacks it just now occurred to me just how much someone was a fan of Bayonetta.

OutofSight
May 4, 2017
What a confusing bossfight. I don't know if it was the Vederinde's ambitious, but titillating and nonsensical boss getup, the twitchy auto-dodging and i frames or the matryoshka doll/iron maiden finisher.

quote:

[...] someone was a fan of Bayonetta.

marshmallow creep
Dec 10, 2008

I've been sitting here for 5 mins trying to think of a joke to make but I just realised the animators of Mass Effect already did it for me

The stacking doll thing is pretty anemic. It just doesn't have any oomph.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.



Knight contracts jaundice.



Walpurgis Night


There are a few early renders online with slightly different faces on the main characters.



The proportions look a bit off too.

Strategic Sage
Jan 22, 2017

And that's the way it is...
I like how a lot of the vines don't reach all the way up to the next pathway, but Heinrich isn't deterred by that in the slightest -- he just keeps reaching upwards and grabbing onto the rock face itself/thin air to keep climbing. Truly he is a master of climbing who has no need of the vines at all.

Arcomage
Nov 10, 2012
Gretchen is slowly showing Heinrich that he never needed her vines to climb. The true magic was within him all along.

Dirk the Average
Feb 7, 2012

"This may have been a mistake."

OutofSight posted:

What a confusing bossfight. I don't know if it was the Vederinde's ambitious, but titillating and nonsensical boss getup, the twitchy auto-dodging and i frames or the matryoshka doll/iron maiden finisher.

Yeah, that boss fight was... uh... something. Certainly not good, whatever it was.

Ratoslov
Feb 15, 2012

Now prepare yourselves! You're the guests of honor at the Greatest Kung Fu Cannibal BBQ Ever!

Is it me, or is the music here like a Symphony of the Night track with all the interesting bits taken out?

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
Man, this really feels like "Verderinde's level", except she's already dead.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.



Witches suck at home maintenance. And traps.



The Witches' Ruins


Oddly, the early Gretchen doesn't look like Folklore's main character.

Arcomage
Nov 10, 2012
Given that you're still dealing with rock enemies in rocky tunnels and your primary obstacle for this episode involves moving rocks in the levels immediately after dealing with Verderinde, I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that they probably moved some bosses around not long before release, most likely because adding the Witch's Enclosure messed up the pacing. It's not hard to see why they'd want at least some kind of boss battle after that (because otherwise you'd be going from long boring winding passages into long boring winding passages in a slightly different color without anything in between), but Verderinde's early death created a plothole that they had to fill with Faust's otherwise entirely non-plot-relevant manservant.

(Frankly, I spent most of the episode hoping that Faust's entirely non-plot-relevant manservant would turn out to be the devil Mephisto, because that might at least lead to a moderately interesting boss battle with a halfway decent literary tie-in. Alas, it was not to be.)

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Arcomage posted:

...
(Frankly, I spent most of the episode hoping that Faust's entirely non-plot-relevant manservant would turn out to be the devil Mephisto, because that might at least lead to a moderately interesting boss battle with a halfway decent literary tie-in. Alas, it was not to be.)

He didn't even turn into anything interesting; he became goatse dentata on two not particularly mobile stump-legs. Wasn't his humanoid form unnaturally strong and agile and good at fighting? There's so much about this game that doesn't even qualify as half-baked :negative:

Kibayasu
Mar 28, 2010

Boss battles? Knight Contract you should't have.

I'll give the game this, even if its just because of a lack of balance you don't often see special attacks that just just kill everything.

Strategic Sage
Jan 22, 2017

And that's the way it is...
Got a good chuckle out of even Heinrich being bored by the loading screen.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.



Feel my powah!



An Old Score to Settle


They ordered a trailer at Blur Studio: the renders look nothing like the game.

Decayer
Jul 25, 2007
Purveyor of fine tarts
So Faust's associate was actually Benjamin Franklin?

EagerSleeper
Feb 3, 2010

by R. Guyovich

Lmao this actually looks pretty good, yet the actual game itself looks nothing like it.

An additional lol goes out to Faust turning to the tried and tested classic battle form of a crab, but deciding to spice it up a bit by including lion elements so he doesn't look completely like the surf-and-turf entree at the seafood restaurant. Maybe aall the yellow stuff from the previous level was vaporized butter for the best flavor.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.



Godlike creatures have the oddest weaknesses.



A Battle of Belief


It should have ended right there, at the early Blur trailers:

Heinrich & Gretchen.

Witches murdering the hell out of a town. This one's :black101:

CirclMastr
Jul 4, 2010

That's a really terrible ending they've got there. And yet it would have been at least 10% better by simply not killing off Minukelsus so he could show up in a gas mask or something.

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.


Grimey Drawer
I wouldn't have guessed this game would end on a sitcom episode ending zinger, and yet it did.

OutofSight
May 4, 2017
WTF was the theme of that ending?

"All things end into nothingness; nothing can be eternal."
"I believe in humanity's desire for a better brighter future."

So let's stick around forever and play watchguard and crisis response team to the occasional evil of the decade.

At least Faust died like a ignorant buffon. "But i am supposed to be the final boss!" Nah, mate. Its was titty witch all along.

OutofSight fucked around with this message at 17:13 on Apr 24, 2018

CirclMastr
Jul 4, 2010

OutofSight posted:

WTF was the theme of that ending?

"All thing end into nothingness; nothing can be eternal."
I believe in humanity's desire for a better brighter future."

So let's stick around forever and play watchguard and crisis response team to the occasional evil of the decade.

It's not even sticking around forever, given the clothing discussion it sounds more like they time-travel around fixing things like Quantum Leap.

RedMagus
Nov 16, 2005

Male....Female...what does it matter? Power is beautiful, and I've got the power!
Grimey Drawer
Hey we're on a quest to stop this terrible thing, then we can finally rest.
... nah let's stick around for hundred of years and keep being do-gooders.

Really it feels like someone sketched out the basics of a story, kept adding on bits, and not bothering to read it all through before hitting "send".

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.


Grimey Drawer
Maybe they just really liked the ending for Castlevania: LoS

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer
Is it wrong that I kinda want to see the sequel set in the nineties?

OutofSight
May 4, 2017

anilEhilated posted:

Is it wrong that I kinda want to see the sequel set in the nineties?
Not at all.
Heinrich and Gretchen's backstory wouldn't be out of place in an urban fantasy setting, like" Vampire: The Masquerade" or "Dresden Files". And at least the "maiden and her knight" (+quirky sidekick) dynamic somewhat worked in this game.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Splatterhouse is the true sequel.

Wait, it was released in 2010.

Arcomage
Nov 10, 2012
To be fair, making Verderinde the Really Final Boss actually kind of makes sense in terms of the level design; I (and several others) had commented on how it's odd to put the level that was obviously supposed to be Verderinde's after her boss fight, and this retroactively makes that foreshadowing of sorts. Just a pity that it still doesn't actually go anywhere with it - absolutely nothing would have changed in terms of plot if the winged angel-thing was just another transformation that Faust pulled out with the glowing gems.

It's also nicely ironic that the game seems for a while to be heading towards a fairly heavy-handed 'all things must end' moral, and then proceeds to demonstrate this by adding another boss battle, three more ending sequences, and then having the protagonist who was explicitly motivated by finally getting to die just sort of go on for several more centuries and a sequel hook.

Kitala
Sep 2, 2012

Not Some Opera Floozy

CirclMastr posted:

It's not even sticking around forever, given the clothing discussion it sounds more like they time-travel around fixing things like Quantum Leap.

Agreed on them time jumping. That would have also been a more interesting plot: immortal knight and witch crossing time and space to destroy mystical anomalies.

Keldulas
Mar 18, 2009
I don't actually mind the ending very much. That being said, I was starting to skip cutscenes cause christ, so I wouldn't really notice the discontinuities that much.

Given how utterly different the ending was, I'd wager that they made the introduction and the endings first. The different models and resources are just too obvious for me to not come to that conclusion. I just think that their contract forced them to horrifically extend and pad the middle, and it gets tortuous because of that. With that in mind, I think the cutscenes were essentially them trying to fill space and just have the characters technically saying words. They weren't too concerned with continuity since they were just crunched.

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

What the gently caress use even are witches in the context of this game, anyhow? I mean, Gretchen talks a big ol' game about helping humanity and What Their Powers Are Really For, but humans barely even exist in this game, and then largely as set dressing--nameless, undifferentiated victims of the characters that matter, the ones who can control space, time, life, death and the bitchinest light shows imaginable :black101: . Even the largely useless comedy relief walks around in a magical construct-body that seems to be able to last indefinitely (as long as he doesn't touch the life-draining plot item). Out of one side of its mouth, the game talks about witches being tragically persecuted and powerless to stop the human institutions being used against them unjustly...but from the other side, in the moment, magic is exclusively for either wrecking poo poo or making poo poo that needs wrecking. Knights Contract seems to want to have a thought-provoking discussion of the dangers of power, and also pander mindlessly to their players' power fantasies, and the two do not harmonize at all well imo.

Kibayasu
Mar 28, 2010

It's a good thing they locked V in a bunch of boxes and didn't cut her in half like they did for the rest of the witches. That would have been embarrassing for her.

marshmallow creep
Dec 10, 2008

I've been sitting here for 5 mins trying to think of a joke to make but I just realised the animators of Mass Effect already did it for me

Given where the first Verderinde bossfight took place, perhaps that was a fake that got triple boxed?

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Nuramor
Dec 13, 2012

Most Amewsing Prinny Ever!
And even in this game Nolan North did a voice.

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