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Jul 1, 2018 12:06
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| # ¿ May 14, 2024 20:58 |
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I initially wrote a lot of text here but it just resulted in me having to explain more and more about the situation at hand so I'm just going to try to keep this as simple and short as possible. If you are friends (not best friends but more definitely more than acquaintances) with someone who was most definitely in something that can be described as an unhealthy relationship, is it okay to want to talk to them about that, or do you feel it is better to let them be because while you know it is unhealthy, you don't really have any business poking around in their relationship? Additionally, if you don't think it's right to poke around and tell her your thoughts, does it suddenly become fine to tell her your thoughts if she accuses you of being in an unhealthy relationship first?
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Jul 1, 2018 17:14
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Looper posted:that's a really tricky situation because of how easy it is for your friend to start getting real defensive and see you as the bad guy if you express doubts about the relationship they still have faith in. like ultimately they have to come to that realization themself, no matter how terrible it is from the outside For me, it's less about turning around and accusing back and more that I just want to come clean and clear the air because I feel like there is tension between us because of my fight with her fiance and, as a result of said fight, she knows that I don't like her fiance now and I'd rather just come clean because I hadn't brought it up for the past 5 years because I didn't want to cause any trouble. It just kinda feels like if she's willing to take the steps to try and clear the air about her own thoughts on the relationship I have with KCB, then it should be fine for me to tell her my thoughts and also why I believe she's wrong. I'm not going to do anything unless KCB says it is ok though because this person is KCB's best friend and also KCB gets anxious as hell when anything related to conflict comes up, regardless of who, where, when, fictional or real, etc etc etc, and as much as it's eating me up inside that this person with a psych degree told me that she thinks KCB's depression and anxiety are my fault and that she copied those traits from my own depression and anxiety, I refuse to go against KCB's word. This is just me asking for opinions and also me venting I guess because eh. First world problems and all that poo poo.
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Jul 1, 2018 17:44
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I said come in! posted:By the way Games chat thread, 
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Jul 2, 2018 09:41
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Happy monday
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Jul 2, 2018 12:29
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Happy -post-happy-monday-greeting Monday
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Jul 2, 2018 16:52
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Kept you cumming, huh
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Jul 2, 2018 18:05
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I'll take one funkopop of a desperately needed vent hood please
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Jul 3, 2018 08:35
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I kept biting my tongue and cheek in my sleep  How's everybody else doing this morning?
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Jul 3, 2018 12:14
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Skypie posted:I'm dividing a box of 1000 connectors into 48-count bags. What are connectors? And do you have to sort them by something in particular or is it just "take 48 out of this box, put them into a bag"? Maybe you could find a scale and figure out the weight of 48 connectors and then just grab however many you'd need that way, or try splitting the boxes into smaller amounts first so that you can divide the work up into 4 quarters or something and take a breather between each quarter?
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Jul 3, 2018 12:46
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Samuringa posted:And right now I'm thinking what else I could eat for breakfast since the yogurt I had left from yesterday wasn't enough. Then play something, I guess. Time to eat some oatmeal!! Oatmeal is good. Skypie posted:They're insulation displacement connectors. Basically, they're made so I can take up to three wires, insert them into an opening, and use a pair of pliers to smash down a cap. The cap has bladed "knives" that pierce the insulation of the wire, thus making a solid electrical joint for the wires inside. Oh poo poo those things. Oof. Well hopefully you're able to find something good to listen to on youtube and also remember to take breaks when you need to! It's important to be able to rest your mind when dealing with stuff that's as tedious as that.
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Jul 3, 2018 13:09
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Cool, what kind of custom monsters? Like, just doing stat sheets for them or making figs too or what? I've always wanted to DM a game but I've never been able to commit to it. There's this really dumb official my little pony tabletop game that my fiancee wants me to DM for her and whoever else she can rope in for it, and it seems fairly simple to DM, but  Same reason I've been having trouble GMing Gratuitous Anime Gimmick (a tabletop rpg a goon made). I know what I want to do but I can't get myself to bother with writing down all of the required stuff for GMing it and it just comes across as a lot of extra effort to get everybody together in a discord channel at one time for a session. I even had a decent idea for a GAG campaign where it would start off relatively normal but then a few sessions in I would have some event happen that gives everybody a jojo stand ability in order to get them wrapped up into the actual meat of the story, but past that idea I haven't actually come up with anything to get people hooked or keep it interesting. I've been tempted to just make a thread in the trad games pen & paper area to run a game there but eh lot of it just comes down to
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Jul 3, 2018 13:31
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The correct choice is "nautilus"
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Jul 3, 2018 14:04
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FirstAidKite presents: the dark tournament
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Jul 3, 2018 14:44
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I wanna ask a question here because I feel like maybe I'm being unreasonable here, or at least being stupid. So KCB wants to get laser eye surgery and that's going to be somewhere around 4k minimum. We don't have that cash right now but she got approved for a credit card specifically for this eye surgery and she can afford the $300 down payment and, on top of that, the doctor is willing to overlook the downpayment and just tack that on to the rest of the bill. She says she really wants this right now because she feels ugly with her glasses and she has trouble getting her contacts in without them causing her trouble and she just feels terrible all the time because of her glasses. I'm worried because I've heard from others that the post-op eyedrops are super expensive and, like I said, it's not money we have right now. Sure she has a credit card confirmed and a payment plan set up, but I feel like it would be better for her to wait a couple of months so that I can get my disability money backpay in which will hopefully be a large enough sum to cover any bills and hopefully her eye surgery. As it is, she believes she can handle paying the initial downpayment for the surgery, as well as covering the credit card debt which has 2 year 0% financing as long as she covers the minimum payments. She also is planning to enroll in some online college courses and those are going to be several hundreds of dollars as well. I just feel like she would be better off waiting until september or whenever I'd get my backpay instead of putting herself into debt right now. I feel like... yeah, having the laser eye surgery would be nice, sure, but I feel like it's the kind of superfluous thing that she should be able to wait on and not have to rush into and it just seems like a lot of debt to be putting yourself into all at once by getting laser eye surgery as well as enrolling in online courses on top of wanting to make a trip to lancaster for a festival, a trip that'll cost around ~$150 to make most likely, and the potentially several hundreds of dollars the post-op eyedrops will cost, and taking care of the car to make sure it is in proper running condition and getting any repairs it needs, and with all of that stuff happening I feel like she should be able to hold off on the eye surgery for a couple of months until I can get my money so that I can just pay for her surgery entirely rather than having that debt hanging over us and requiring her to dish out extra month over the course of the months leading up to me getting my backpay. Sorry for the wall of text. yeah this is the games chat thread, it's stupid for me to ask this here, but I want to ask because I feel like maybe I'm just being stupid about this whole thing. The decision is ultimately her's and I told her that I'll support her on whatever decision she makes, but I also told her my thoughts on why I think it'd be a bad idea and why I think waiting would be a good idea.
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Jul 3, 2018 15:37
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Cowcaster posted:do what i do, accept your ugliness and be dead inside That's me in the nutshell there's a damned good reason I don't let people take photos of me to put online and why when I make costumes it is always something that will cover my face. Nobody needs to be exposed to this.
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Jul 3, 2018 16:35
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I think if I could get away with it without looking like a criminal or drawing attention to myself, I'd definitely just wear a mask around when I go out Just easier that way I guess As far as KCB and the reason for the surgery goes, it's definitely a cosmetic thing but she also feels so distressed about wearing glasses that it feeds into her anxiety and depression and she ends up feeling worse because she doesn't like how she looks in glasses. I hadn't even thought of getting her to go look at and try on different glasses though. I think she'll be reluctant to try that but I'll hopefully be able to convince her to at least..uh..try
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Jul 3, 2018 17:02
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Though to clarify, she said there there is no interest on the credit until after the 2 years are up or she misses a payment, so that is part of her argument on why she should be able to cover this smoothly and then she can just make payments on time until my disability money comes in at which point I can pay off the rest I just feel like maybe I'm being bad here because this is something she wants and I'm raining on her parade by saying "this doesn't sound like the brightest idea"
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Jul 3, 2018 17:21
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She says frames are a no-go because she hates how she looks in any and all frames, that they are not an option because she says they make her look schlubby and ugly and she hates them.Doorknob Slobber posted:are contacts not an option? She said that she can't deal with her contacts anymore because they make her eyes hurt
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Jul 3, 2018 17:47
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I love KCB, I really do, but sometimes I wish she didn't care quite as much about looks as she does. She used to be a huge stickler for things like colors matching and such back when we were dirt poor and had no income whatsoever and that kind of thing is hard to deal with when you go to a goodwill and instead of just being able to purchase blankets you want, you have to also make sure they match. Thankfully things like that have been dialed down as she's gotten used to not having to match stuff, but she still gets incredibly..vain? is that the word? about her appearance, often saying she looks absolutely hideous just because she is wearing glasses and hasn't fully brushed her hair yet, and this is a hard idea to break with her because the person who raised her is an extremely vain person who only cares about looks and cares about little else and is entirely about looking like the richest of the poor
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Jul 3, 2018 17:51
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That's another thing I'm worried about, I'm concerned that this will only be a temp fix if she goes through with it, since the problem here isn't specifically the glasses but rather her poor self-esteem and how she sees herself, I don't know how long it'll be after the laser eye surgery before she potentially relapses and says that she's still ugly and hideous. If that even happens at all. I don't know.
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Jul 3, 2018 17:53
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I asked her before hand if she cared if I asked in here and she suggested I go for it because there's no harm in getting opinions from others and that she was planning to ask her coworkers as well, she just wishes I'd brought up my concerns earlier. I wish I had too, but I didn't even really have any concerns until I realized that the tentative date for this would be like..a couple weeks from now, when I thought that she'd be trying to aim for a date much later after I get on disability.
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Jul 3, 2018 18:07
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Cowcaster posted:you should probably do the opposite of whatever i recommend but it seems like the compromise here is to plan for getting the lasik (since she's kind of got the whole thing planned out), but hold off on scheduling it until your disability starts coming through first See that was my initial plan, but I feel like an rear end when I tell her that she might be better off waiting a few months for us to actually have that money to spend rather than spending on a credit car now and paying it back later. I hope she comes around to it but I still can't help but feel like a jackass since it is her money and the credit card has her name and the other cosigner's name on it, and I'm not involved in the credit card in anyway and she is an adult so ultimately the decision is her's to make. I just don't think it's the right decision and I'm hoping that she'll be able to see why I think she'd be better off waiting.
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Jul 3, 2018 18:18
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I just want to say thank you to everyone who has replied back, I appreciate it so much. I was afraid that maybe I was being unreasonable and controlling and abusive and I'm glad to have all these replies that I can show her. I try to be supportive of her in everything she does but the eye surgery stuff just seemed like..such a stretch for right now, but I was afraid that me asking her to wait would make me just like this other guy we make fun of who is always telling his girlfriend that she needs to give him his allowance so he can go buy TCG booster sets at walmart so he can try to make money off of them by reselling them. I'm just brokebrained and I'm happy that people are willing to put up with my poo poo this early in the day on a tuesday
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Jul 3, 2018 18:34
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Hi everybody, what's shakin in here
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Jul 4, 2018 03:22
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Mak0rz posted:Woah you changed your joseph avatar Yeah, 4 or so months ago I said sexualizing minors in cartoons is a bad thing so someone got mad and bought a red text accusing me of abusing my fiancee. Then someone else bought me this pink text that makes about as much sense as what the original red text said.
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Jul 4, 2018 03:35
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mutata posted:Oh for sure. Getting a reasonable loan from a solid source to buy something of utility like a car or house if the numbers run ok and you can afford it is good. I'm mostly talking about straight up consumer debt via credit cards or seller financing schemes. Credit cards can be good for sudden emergencies that need $500-$3000 or whatever, or if you can afford and trust yourself to use them and pay them to zero every month. She's largely upset that so many people think that just getting different frames will fix her problem when she says that the problem is that having glasses on at all makes her feel absolutely hideous and horrifyingly ugly and she doesn't care what other say because that's just what she sees. She said she didn't see herself this way when she had her contacts in and she's tried getting information about how she can reduce the pain from using contacts but she said nothing works and she's just so frustrated because she was so close to going to lasik and she had an appointment for next week to get it done and I didn't bring up anything until now because I legit didn't know anything about it until now. I knew she wanted to get lasik but I didn't know anything about the price and certainly didn't know it was going to be happening so soon. At the least I'd like her to wait until I get the disability money in so that I can cover it but she kept saying about how she's already approved for the credit card through the lasik center and that she can pay for it that way and that as long as she makes the payments on time, there won't be any interest, and then when my disability comes in then I can just pay it off. She's so frustrated that she was this close to finally being able to look in a mirror and not hate herself only to have it dragged away and she said that she doesn't think I understand what she's going through, that most people don't seem to understand since they keep suggesting different frames and she's had 12 different glasses over the course of her life and she has always felt so ugly in them no matter what. She said her coworkers understand where I'm coming from but also said that she should just go and treat herself, that she doesn't really treat herself ever with cosmetic things. I just want her to wait until I get my money in but like... I said I don't know if she'll even feel pretty after the surgery, that it might be a temp fix where one day she'll look in the mirror and think she's still ugly even without the glasses, and she just started crying and crying and telling me that I didn't understand, that nobody understands, that she guesses she must be the unreasonable one for wanting to be pretty. I just... ugh, I want her to be happy and I know how it feels to have some plans made and then have them changed on you at the last minute and I know how it feels to be the one who has to change those sudden plans at the last minute. It makes me feel like a complete and utter rear end in a top hat. I know how horrible she feels, how she feels so awful just from having glasses on and I understand all of that completely, I just... I wish she could wait. I only brought up my reservations with doing it so soon because I found out it was happening so soon, I'd been under the impression that there was no way this was going to be happening in like...a week from the consultation. Having it happen so soon, my brain was just like "this...there's something wrong here" especially when she started going into the credit card thing, the post-op recovery, finding out about the eyedrops and how nothing would be covered by insurance because it would be considered an elective cosmetic thing, I know she feels really sad because she feels like I'm ripping away the chance of her treating herself to make herself feel pretty but I just really want her to wait until we get the money. Her plan already involved waiting for the money anyway, it was just that she would be waiting on the money while also paying off the payments, and with all of the big expenses we'll be facing soon, I hoped she'd be more understanding about maybe just waiting a few more months. The "try other frames" thing really got to her though because she feels like she's ugly in all frames, no matter what, and like everybody just didn't understand how she feels by saying she should just get some new frames. Ugh I feel like a shithead and a bad person
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Jul 4, 2018 10:09
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Thankfully KCB already has a therapist and she has agreed to bring this up with her as well the next time she can see her. Unfortunately, that won't be for a week because our therapist is the only one who takes all insurance types so she ends up being pretty booked. Though the best part about heading to therapy is that we get to stop at the nearby SHEETZ BROS GAS STATION FAST FOOD RESTAURANT where we can get a cool FROZEN SHEETZ COFFEEZ, a NICE WARM SHEETZ MELTZ SANDWICH or a hot SHMISCUIT or SHMUFFIN or SHMAGEL, and for dessert, some breakfast SHWEETZ like the cup of CINAPOPPERZ
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Jul 4, 2018 11:22
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Looper posted:yeah, i wasn't sure if i was reading that correctly but if the process of getting approval for the credit card had anything to do with the lasik office itself, that's a huge red flag and there's no way that making those payments is going to work the way y'all want them to in 2018's US https://www.creditkarma.com/reviews/credit-card/single/id/carecredit-card I went and found it, that's the credit card they offered her. 
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Jul 4, 2018 19:25
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Well the good news is that KCB has decided to postpone the surgery after all once she found out just how shifty the credit card was. I just wish it didn't take finding out that the credit card was shifty. I'm glad she's postponing it but her defense up until that point was just "I think we'll be fine" which doesn't really inspire confidence when it's in response to "we have lots of expenses coming up, several hundreds worth of expenses in bills and other things we've had planned out" So things are fine for now, but I'm hoping next time we get to see our therapist that our therapist can help her understand my view some more because I was apparently doing a piss poor job of explaining myself because she kept going back to saying that she doesn't believe I understand the situation and that she thinks it will all be fine. On top of that is the fact that I've been having panic attacks and depressive moods pretty much every other day and that has been putting enough stress on her that she has been losing her patience with me and things are just rough. Gonna play some picross to take my mind off of things. Picross is good for that. I'll play it til I fall asleep, it's good for knocking me out.
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Jul 5, 2018 06:09
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I just hope I don't cause too much trouble for my therapist. My psychiatrist, when he saw me the other day, was all "I don't know what your therapist has been doing for the past several years but you've gotta stop beating yourself up man" because KCB told him that I've been hurting myself more lately during the various depressive moods and panic moods (I'd have told him myself but I wasn't in any kind of talking shape at the time) and when I was a little less out of it, KCB and I both agreed that it was pretty lovely of him to say that to me because like...of course I should not being so hard on myself, physically and mentally, but that's the problem. It doesn't matter that I know I should go easier on myself, just telling me that I need to stop doing it is like telling someone with broken legs to walk it off. It's not that simple and it's annoying that this normally kind and understanding dude was just like "well man I don't know what to tell you, you've gotta stop beating yourself up so much" as if the answer all along to "how do we keep this mentally ill guy from beating himself up figuratively/literally/mentally/physically" was "cut it out" ugh Did anyone get anything good from the steam sale? I used my card money to pick up Cook Serve Delicious 2 for KCB and Paint It Back for myself.
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Jul 5, 2018 06:40
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Hopper posted:What the hell am I looking at there? Gay erotica
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Jul 5, 2018 07:08
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univbee posted:Therapist is a "just you" thing and psychiatrist is a "you + KCB" thing, right? The therapist we have is good, she's just stuck in a situation where there are certain things she would like to do but she has experience showing that for her patients who are attempting to get disability, their disability will be denied if it turns out that the patient is receiving certain forms of treatment so the therapist isn't allowed to do certain forms of treatment or else she risks me losing any chance of getting on disability. KCB and I both see the same psychiatrist for our separate issues and we also see the same therapist, generally in back-to-back sessions, for our own separate issues. It's just easier for everybody if we're all around during it. The therapist is good and has been helping a lot when we've been able to get an appointment with her (she accepts all insurances so she's usually booked pretty tight). It's not a couple counseling thing either, we are just both sufficiently hosed up that we need therapy and meds for our own issues.
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Jul 5, 2018 14:31
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What's everyone's favorite bond song I like view to a kill and tomorrow never dies the most
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Jul 5, 2018 16:38
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Special mention to Everything or Nothing for having imo the best bond opening of a video game https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YxSNa8mndE
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Jul 5, 2018 16:50
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I've been wanting to do a bond movie marathon for a few months now, just getting some buddies together for movie nights so we can enjoy the better ones and riff on the not-so-good ones and just kinda take it all in since bond films are a special kind of part of film culture that are worth seeing imo
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Jul 5, 2018 17:05
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VideoGames posted:I actually just bought the Bluray box set with all 24 films in because Lady VG had not seen any except the Brosnan films, and we started at the beginning. Sounds like it's time for you to host the usurper kite discord pile james bond movie night 
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Jul 5, 2018 18:23
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I remember a magazine thing when I was younger, I don't think it was the n64 goldeneye guide, it was something that talked about the n64 goldeneye though because it also brought up the various bond actors and there was some actor listed as the potential "future" of bond once brosnan was done, saying this guy was training to be the next bond or to be a special bond for video game purposes. I have no clue what magazine that was or the article or anything, though I also remember it having some bond escape sequence comic parody at the start where a secret agent is strapped to a table with a laser beam pointed between his legs and you were supposed to figure out how he saves himself and the answer was that he would piss himself so that the laser would reflect off of the piss, destroying the machine and giving him ample amount of time to escape from his restraints. Memories are weird.
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Jul 5, 2018 18:45
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| # ¿ May 14, 2024 20:58 |
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Real hurthling! posted:Is view to a kill a real bond movie or like a fake one. Idk but its really bad It is very real, and it is my friend.  Also apparently the villain role was offered to David Bowie but Bowie passed on it because he figured they'd need a stuntman for him more than for Bowie proper.
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Jul 5, 2018 18:52
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