Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Obsidianheart
Apr 26, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.
You never said we were exclusive.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

504
Feb 2, 2016

by R. Guyovich
For love! I'll carry this printer.

OB-GYN Kenobi
Dec 4, 2017
Master knifed in head, I explode.

Winifred Madgers
Feb 12, 2002

Want to have kids? Bad news....

JediTalentAgent
Jun 5, 2005
Hey, look. Look, if- if you screw me on this, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine, you rat bastard!
Technically, all otaku should be imprisoned.

WatermelonGun
May 7, 2009
Don’t abort my baby, President Dad.

Winifred Madgers
Feb 12, 2002

Overdue notice in car (virtue signaling).

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
I'm a Something Awful forums mod

504
Feb 2, 2016

by R. Guyovich
Kennedy’s in Texas, next time duck!

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


Your dad pooped in your mouth.

Fur20
Nov 14, 2007

すご▞い!
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね!

Casimir Radon posted:

Your dad pooped in your mouth.

What is sad about this story?

Pneub
Mar 12, 2007

I'M THE DEVIL, AND I WILL WASH OVER THE EARTH AND THE SEAS WILL RUN RED WITH THE BLOOD OF ALL THE SINNERS

I AM REBORN

Painful Dart Bomb posted:

For sale: meat shoes, never worn

"I never endorsed those shoes."~Hogan

God Of Paradise
Jan 23, 2012
You know, I'd be less worried about my 16 year old daughter dating a successful 40 year old cartoonist than dating a 16 year old loser.

I mean, Jesus, kid, at least date a motherfucker with abortion money and house to have sex at where your mother and I don't have to hear it. Also, if he treats her poorly, boom, that asshole's gonna catch a statch charge.

Please, John K. Date my daughter... Save her from dating smelly dropouts who wanna-be Soundcloud rappers.
For Sale: Baby Shoes, I'm Gay.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
Wife left me for my dad

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.
Grandma with Alzheimer's can't remember me.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
Azealia Banks clowned me on Twitter

Winifred Madgers
Feb 12, 2002

Grandma without Alzheimer's won't acknowledge me.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
I have Alzheimer's... Who has Alzheimer's?

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.
Grandmother is posting on Something Awful!

Crusher3
Aug 10, 2018

I'm not an early bird or a night owl. I am some form of permanently exhausted pigeon.
We peeled him off a tree

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
I thought she said "HPV"

Valko
Sep 18, 2015
Hold my beer and watch this!

Being sent for a long stand.

Valko fucked around with this message at 05:50 on Aug 16, 2018

barnold
Dec 16, 2011


what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot
i came, i shidded, i farted

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
People say I resemble Stephen Miller

Pneub
Mar 12, 2007

I'M THE DEVIL, AND I WILL WASH OVER THE EARTH AND THE SEAS WILL RUN RED WITH THE BLOOD OF ALL THE SINNERS

I AM REBORN

Screaming Idiot posted:

Grandmother is posting on Something Awful!

Grandmother "has stairs in her house".

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Pneub posted:

Grandmother "has stairs in her house".

"Pak, chooie, unf," said Pusher Robot.

deedee megadoodoo
Sep 28, 2000
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one to Flavortown, and that has made all the difference.


This thread keeps getting new posts.

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018

very stable genius posted:

This thread keeps getting new posts.

I still read them every time.

Obsidianheart
Apr 26, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.
the hangover is pretty bad today.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Obsidianheart posted:

the hangover is pretty bad today.

That movie is bad every day.

Thin Privilege
Jul 8, 2009
IM A STUPID MORON WITH AN UGLY FACE AND A BIG BUTT AND MY BUTT SMELLS AND I LIKE TO KISS MY OWN BUTT
Gravy Boat 2k
Hate my life hope I die


Does that work or used previously?


I have to post an edit:

I have to go to work tomorrow

I hate my job so much

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Thin Privilege posted:

Hate my life hope I die


Does that work or used previously?

Yes, by me. In real life.

Thin Privilege
Jul 8, 2009
IM A STUPID MORON WITH AN UGLY FACE AND A BIG BUTT AND MY BUTT SMELLS AND I LIKE TO KISS MY OWN BUTT
Gravy Boat 2k

Screaming Idiot posted:

Yes, by me. In real life.

I have also done that before.

Thin Privilege
Jul 8, 2009
IM A STUPID MORON WITH AN UGLY FACE AND A BIG BUTT AND MY BUTT SMELLS AND I LIKE TO KISS MY OWN BUTT
Gravy Boat 2k
Actually, I did in previous post!

Obsidianheart
Apr 26, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.
Got caught watching ASMR videos, naked.

SPECIAL REAL LIFE STORY:
Water, coming in under the walls

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Hours jerking it, did not nutt.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.
Praise God! I starved my child!

EugeneJ
Feb 5, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
I masturbated, I cried, mom died

Obsidianheart
Apr 26, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.
MORE FROM THE REAL WORLD:

Tried to help; hurt my foot.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag

Colonel Cancer posted:

Hours jerking it, did not nutt.

Load finally blown, not enough tissues.

  • Locked thread