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 Thanks to my long and storied posting career I have gained a noetic wealth of wisdom and knowledge. The knowledge I have is ineffable and thus I feel the best way to communicate it is via koan. Please have a seat, the lessons are about to begin. The acolyte approached the master and pulled him aside. In a hushed voice he whispers "Master, I have learned that my father is homosexual. He acts effeminate and lies with other men." The master looked at the acolyte and shrugged. There is learning to be had within these walls though much of it is obscure and sometimes obscene. The master was speaking at length about correct posting styles and content. The acolytes listened with rapt attention until he finished speaking. A long silence descended until one of the youngest spoke up. "Master, when is the best time to post?" The master thought about this for a while and then replied "The forums aren't bound by day or night; all times are the best time to post." The acolyte thought about this for a while and then said "Master, where is the best place to post?" After a pause the master said "forumid=51" I hope that you use the ideas found here to better the world. The Buddha does not post for our world. Instead the Buddha writes his posts and gives them to the birds who sing and tweet and cannot read. This is Enlightened Posting." Please share any koans that you may know. Namaste.
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Oct 23, 2018 01:29
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| # ? May 3, 2024 00:44 |
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The man who does not post for fear of probation, has already banned himself
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Oct 23, 2018 01:35
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A dollar spent on a hillbilly hot dog shack will return an endless stream of priceless comedy
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Oct 23, 2018 01:37
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A goon who falls in a well and has only other goons to help him, he is doomed.
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Oct 23, 2018 01:46
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Empty and full: diarrhea shelf
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Oct 23, 2018 01:58
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A post a day keeps the psychiatrist at bay
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Oct 23, 2018 01:59
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Something Awful is neither something nor awful
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Oct 23, 2018 02:01
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Does OP have good poster nature, a novice asked his master. There were many beatings and screams after.
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Oct 23, 2018 02:04
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Devils Affricate posted:The man who does not post for fear of probation, has already banned himself nice
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Oct 23, 2018 02:40
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givepatajob posted:A dollar spent on a hillbilly hot dog shack will return an endless stream of priceless comedy Pretty deep when you think about it 
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Oct 23, 2018 02:44
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What's the sound of one hand posting
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Oct 23, 2018 03:32
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Show me your original avatar before your mother and father were born.
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Oct 23, 2018 03:32
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raton posted:Empty and full: diarrhea shelf We look and again we find duality
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Oct 23, 2018 03:36
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Devils Affricate posted:The man who does not post for fear of probation, has already banned himself
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Oct 23, 2018 03:42
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Can't do better than that  Lol, I suck
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Oct 23, 2018 03:51
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Devils Affricate posted:The man who does not post for fear of probation, has already banned himself
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Oct 23, 2018 03:52
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"Master, I am of a timid nature, yet I long for companionship. A desirable female is known to me, but I do not catch her gaze." The teacher paused his studies. "You must prove yourself of value to her. What she needs most, you shall provide." The student thought hard. His eyes lit up. "She is changing residence. A large printing apparatus burdens her. With my brawn I can transport it." "Go then, and do not ask for compensation. It will come to you surely."
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Oct 23, 2018 03:59
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This is the sound of one hand posting
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Oct 23, 2018 04:05
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A_Bug_That_Thinks posted:This is the sound of one hand posting While the other jerks off a stranger
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Oct 23, 2018 04:06
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When the .999999... is reduced to one, to what is the one reduced?
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Oct 23, 2018 04:08
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What is the color of breaking wind?
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Oct 23, 2018 04:10
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If you see the Buddha posting on the forums, troll him.
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Oct 23, 2018 04:17
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Bogus Adventure posted:Something Awful is neither something nor awful We have embraced the nothingness ॐ
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Oct 23, 2018 04:17
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One day Chao-chou fell down in the snow, and called out, “Help me up! Help me up!” A mod came and lay down beside him. Chao-chou got up and went away.
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Oct 23, 2018 04:26
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One day as Manjusri was banned, the Buddha called to him, “Manjusri, Manjusri, why do you not rereg?” Manjusri replied, “I do not see myself as banned. Why rereg?”
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Oct 23, 2018 04:29
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If the Groverhaus collapses in on itself without anyone from local government to see it has it violated any building regulations?
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Oct 23, 2018 04:34
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the master asked the novice "from whence does a good post come?" the novice thought, then pointed at his head. the master frowned. again, the master asked the novice "from whence does a good post come?" the novice thought longer, then pointed at his heart. again, the master frowned. a third time, the master asked the novice "from whence does a good post come?" the novice, now distraught, pointed at his rear end. the master smiled.
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Oct 23, 2018 04:52
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The master asked, "is it better to build a house like grover, or to code forums like radium?" A student replied, "The forums, because a house, once built, cannot be easily altered." The master could not answer because someone had changed the copyright date.
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Oct 23, 2018 05:10
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A young goon carried with him a box of little value. Many suggested that he sell it. Some that he eat it. Others that he keep it. But he came across a great master, who said "with this ancient recipe, you can burn it." The good new that burning it could bring him many fives. With his wombat friend, he set a great fire. When the fire died down, the master did not see him, and asked "young goon, where have you gone?" The reply came, "at hospital, lost fingat."
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Oct 23, 2018 05:20
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A young goon said to his teacher "I shall one day be like the great Caro. I shall travel the world, learn many trades and awe those who never would have believed in me and called me a total dumbass." "Young goon," said the teacher "In saying these things, you are already like the great Caro."
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Oct 23, 2018 05:21
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iiiiiii’mmmmmm the hairrrrrrry buuuuuuuuutthole ooooooooooooommmm
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Oct 23, 2018 05:40
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One morning, the master, with a wry smile on his face, asked the class, "What number of genders exist among the populace?" The students remained silent. They knew this was a trap. Unexpectedly, the youngest of them spoke up. "At least two," he shouted. The master smiled. "Correct."
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Oct 23, 2018 05:41
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What did the mods know?
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Oct 23, 2018 05:43
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The novice monk remarked, "The circus is in town," and his master mused, "Is it?"
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Oct 23, 2018 05:45
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Fear not the goon who has made 10,000 posts once, but the goon who has made one post 10,000 times
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Oct 23, 2018 05:56
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“Master, when I am with a desiresble female I find that my intimate member engorges in a visual way and I worry she shall see.” “Emulate the mindset of the feline my student and your shame shall evaporate.” .......................... “That was not what I meant you dumbass!”
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Oct 23, 2018 06:06
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He who jumps the ladder has already fallen.
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Oct 23, 2018 06:16
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Devils Affricate posted:Fear not the goon who has made 10,000 posts once, but the goon who has made one post 10,000 times lmbo
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Oct 23, 2018 06:18
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Devils Affricate posted:The man who does not post for fear of probation, has already banned himself
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Oct 23, 2018 06:18
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| # ? May 3, 2024 00:44 |
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The master, at dinner, inquired of one of his novices, "Good Lord, what is happening in there?" The novice replied, "Aurora Borealis." The master pondered this and left, enlightened.
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Oct 23, 2018 06:20
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