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Drunk Nerds posted:Best part was, I didn't know it was in the same universe until the tape. Freaking made my day. Broadchurch is not even remotely horror not sure why the guy recommended it, it’s just an aggressively depressing British detective drama. The first season is great, the second Is alright, and the third is one of the worst seasons of television I’ve ever seen and descends into unintentional self parody. The first season of Fortitude is pretty good horror mystery TV on prime, it goes downhill on two also. I think Final Prayer is on streaming still that’s a really good one if you’re okay with found footage Tolkien minority fucked around with this message at 15:21 on Jan 7, 2019 |
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Jan 7, 2019 15:18
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This was ok. I like lovecraftian horror and there is definitely not enough of that around nowadays. The good parts - no bullshit attitude. Bullock justs gets this movie done and doesn't get on your nerves. gives zero fucks. - no dumb child drama, everything that happens with the children actually makes sense. - The premise is consistent. It's an Eldritch horror, you look at it and it shows you something and you go mad. There is no escaping or weasling out of it with cameras or whatever. No technobabble cure, no monster weakspot, nothing is conquered by love
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Jan 7, 2019 19:50
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Raspberry Jam It In Me posted:- The premise is consistent. It's an Eldritch horror, you look at it and it shows you something and you go mad. There is no escaping or weasling out of it with cameras or whatever. No technobabble cure, no monster weakspot, nothing is conquered by love Unless you're some kind of undefined "crazy" in which you become eeeeeeeeeeeeevil and try to force other people to look at them for some reason. And then at some point the monsters learn how to talk and try and convince you to take your blindfold off for some reason. Its a loving hack script written by an idiot, for idiots, who was inspired after watching M. Night's masterpiece The Happening.
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Jan 7, 2019 20:08
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Tolkien minority posted:The ritual was actually pretty good and it makes me wonder why that didn’t get the push that bird box did I really liked The Ritual. It has some extremely clever cinematography and interesting design, like when the main character is sleepwalking through the dream of the liquor store, and you can't really tell if this is happening or a dream, then the creature smashes through the shelves and chases him. It's not an amazing movie, but it definitely deserves more time in the spotlight than it got. Hell, its one of the few horror movies I've seen where I actually think about it afterwards. Fashionable Jorts fucked around with this message at 20:16 on Jan 7, 2019 |
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Jan 7, 2019 20:13
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Fashionable Jorts posted:Unless you're some kind of undefined "crazy" in which you become eeeeeeeeeeeeevil and try to force other people to look at them for some reason. And then at some point the monsters learn how to talk and try and convince you to take your blindfold off for some reason. the first part is perfectly in keeping with eldritch horror. the easiest way to survive is to give in and ally yourself with the evil powers, so that's what people with weak moral fiber or whatever do. in more elaborate versions they start trying to make everyone else join them because it's the only way to "save" them. the second is pretty dumb tho
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Jan 7, 2019 21:03
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Fashionable Jorts posted:Unless you're some kind of undefined "crazy" in which you become eeeeeeeeeeeeevil and try to force other people to look at them for some reason. And then at some point the monsters learn how to talk and try and convince you to take your blindfold off for some reason. Yeah, the cthulhu worshipping mad cults are kind off a staple of Lovecraft. Whatever the creatures are showing people, these guy are not fazed or traumatized by it. Some people just don't feel guilt, remorse or empathy. Like, when most people see child abuse they recoil in horror, but a small number of people get a boner. Or, if you want to interpret the event as some kind of old testament judgment day, then the righteous people are overcome with remorse and guilt when being shown the sins of humanity but the evil people don't give a gently caress and don't feel anything, so god/the angles use them as an instrument to dispense judgment. Also, whispers are there from the very beginning but the creatures never come close enough and nobody hangs around them long enough to hear distinct voices(until the ending)
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Jan 7, 2019 21:47
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Raspberry Jam It In Me posted:- no bullshit attitude. Bullock justs gets this movie done and doesn't get on your nerves. gives zero fucks. It was pretty refreshing tbh. "Shut the gently caress up, do what I say or YOU WILL DIE"
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Jan 7, 2019 22:21
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Raspberry Jam It In Me posted:- no dumb child drama, everything that happens with the children actually makes sense. except two grown adults never name them and call them "boy" and "girl" --something that literally no one, let alone two people would ever do
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Jan 7, 2019 22:28
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Last Chance posted:except two grown adults never name them and call them "boy" and "girl" --something that literally no one, let alone two people would ever do I assumed it was a way to not get too attached if the children died vOv. Like she only names them when they're "safe" in the jungle bird house
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Jan 7, 2019 22:30
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Last Chance posted:except two grown adults never name them and call them "boy" and "girl" --something that literally no one, let alone two people would ever do Yeah like the black guy seemed pretty normal so why he let her do that I dunno. She must have been a massive bitch though. Edit: I mean she was a massive bitch. That much is clear.
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Jan 7, 2019 22:31
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After struggling for a year to conceive the pregnancy test finally comes back positive. The fateful day arrives and you go into labor. A small baby appears out of your vagina and resolutely announces, “I recommend that you watch Bird Box” You die.
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Jan 7, 2019 22:33
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unpacked robinhood posted:I assumed it was a way to not get too attached if the children died vOv. Like she only names them when they're "safe" in the jungle bird house sounds suspiciously like "dumb child drama" to me
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Jan 7, 2019 22:36
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Last Chance posted:yes i understand the hamfisted reasons The reason kinda falls apart though when there is another seemingly normal person who is helping to raise the kids. Like if it was just her sure maybe I get it but another person? Na no way.
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Jan 7, 2019 22:38
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Dude should've stolen away the two kids in the night the moment they were born so they don't have to grow up around an abusive mother.
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Jan 7, 2019 22:40
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Fashionable Jorts posted:Unless you're some kind of undefined "crazy" in which you become eeeeeeeeeeeeevil and try to force other people to look at them for some reason. And then at some point the monsters learn how to talk and try and convince you to take your blindfold off for some reason. I have the attention span of a stupid child, but wasn't the "monsters talking" just one of the evil guys speaking from the river shore? I'm no brain genius or anything, but doesn't sound carry quite well over some waters for science reasons? Again, I'm very simple, but, after the "whispers," didn't Ms. Bullock immediately get jumped by the evil guy as she strayed too close to shore? I'm just an idiot, but the whole sequence reminded me of that "mystery music" that was haunting rich people in New Jersey(?) for like six months until one brave man finally tracked down the dastardly perpetrators bumping loud-rear end bass in a skate park who promptly fled his holy retribution, much as our dear friend, Sandra, conquered the evil man via slap-fighting and paddling away. I pray this finds you well, Fashionable Jorts. Sincerely, A moron
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Jan 7, 2019 22:51
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Last Chance posted:except two grown adults never name them and call them "boy" and "girl" --something that literally no one, let alone two people would ever do IRC there was a practice in many pre-industrial societies to only name children after months or even years because child mortality in the first few months was just so insanely high. the babies got some generic placeholder name till the parents were sure it would make it. unpacked robinhood posted:It was pretty refreshing tbh. "Shut the gently caress up, do what I say or YOU WILL DIE" Yeah that was kinda cool. She also tells them that she packed their teddy bears and there is nothing in the house they need to go back for cause it's a common trope and source of drama in movies that the child forgets their toy or whatever and they have to go back for it. Also "if you cry, YOU WILL DIE"
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Jan 7, 2019 22:53
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Raspberry Jam It In Me posted:IRC there was a practice in many pre-industrial societies to only name children after months or even years because child mortality in the first few months was just so insanely high. the babies got some generic placeholder name till the parents were sure it would make it. interesting, but ultimately unrelated history lesson!
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Jan 7, 2019 22:55
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Last Chance posted:interesting, but ultimately unrelated history lesson! tiny robot crawls under outhouse partition and recommends you watch Bird Box. "Golem!" you shout and all the jews in your province get pogromed
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Jan 7, 2019 23:05
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this is the future you want
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Jan 7, 2019 23:06
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Nut to Butt posted:I have the attention span of a stupid child, but wasn't the "monsters talking" just one of the evil guys speaking from the river shore? I'm no brain genius or anything, but doesn't sound carry quite well over some waters for science reasons? Again, I'm very simple, but, after the "whispers," didn't Ms. Bullock immediately get jumped by the evil guy as she strayed too close to shore? I'm just an idiot, but the whole sequence reminded me of that "mystery music" that was haunting rich people in New Jersey(?) for like six months until one brave man finally tracked down the dastardly perpetrators bumping loud-rear end bass in a skate park who promptly fled his holy retribution, much as our dear friend, Sandra, conquered the evil man via slap-fighting and paddling away. Near the end in the forest, the spoopy monster whispered to the kids and tried to convince them to take their blindfolds off. No evil guys telling them to do it, somehow the monster learned language, how to imitate voices, and tried very convincingly to get the kids to do what it wants. Because the hack writer is like "oh poo poo I made the monsters way too easy to defeat, lets add this random plot contrivance in".
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Jan 8, 2019 00:15
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Bird Box is A Quiet Place for dumb people, and A Quiet Place wasn't exactly a cerebral movie.
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Jan 8, 2019 00:17
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Fashionable Jorts posted:Bird Box is A Quiet Place for dumb people. so what you're saying is that it will be far more popular than a quiet place and make far more money??
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Jan 8, 2019 00:21
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youtube only wants me to watch videos about how many coins mario can avoid
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Jan 8, 2019 00:25
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Owlofcreamcheese posted:youtube only wants me to watch videos about how many coins mario can avoid how many coins can mario avoid?
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Jan 8, 2019 00:27
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If random goons abhor it for flimsy reasons you can bet it's probably good. This isn't limited to movies.
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Jan 8, 2019 00:31
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All of them. The lazy gently caress.
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Jan 8, 2019 00:32
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Fashionable Jorts posted:Near the end in the forest, the spoopy monster whispered to the kids and tried to convince them to take their blindfolds off. No evil guys telling them to do it, somehow the monster learned language, how to imitate voices, and tried very convincingly to get the kids to do what it wants. Because the hack writer is like "oh poo poo I made the monsters way too easy to defeat, lets add this random plot contrivance in". Thank you, and fair enough. I think I was pretty hosed up by that point and, even then, found the ending unsatisfying and abrupt.
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Jan 8, 2019 00:53
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Owlofcreamcheese posted:youtube only wants me to watch videos about how many coins mario can avoid
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Jan 8, 2019 01:06
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i feel like im never going to find out how many coins can mario avoid
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Jan 8, 2019 01:20
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a bone to pick posted:If random goons abhor it for flimsy reasons you can bet it's probably good. This isn't limited to movies. Unintentional humble-brag
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Jan 8, 2019 01:45
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I half expected the kids to kinda adapt because they were born after the ghost invasion but that wouldn't make for a very interesting plot except maybe when they learn to drive to move adults around.
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Jan 8, 2019 06:32
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I hate how it has stereotypical movie kid behavior. The kids are all quiet and don't really behave like kids at all, like they're puppets but with a really rudimentary AI built in that can only say phrases like "I'm scared" or "I'm cold" because they couldn't convey their feelings in some more convincing way. The way they stare entranced at the adults is stupid, I've never seen a real kid do that.
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Jan 8, 2019 20:48
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Shibawanko posted:I hate how it has stereotypical movie kid behavior. The kids are all quiet and don't really behave like kids at all, like they're puppets but with a really rudimentary AI built in that can only say phrases like "I'm scared" or "I'm cold" because they couldn't convey their feelings in some more convincing way. The way they stare entranced at the adults is stupid, I've never seen a real kid do that. Ok my friend have you seen a kid born into a world where Sandra is a raging bitch? I think not.
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Jan 8, 2019 21:09
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Nut to Butt posted:Thank you, and fair enough. I think I was pretty hosed up by that point and, even then, found the ending unsatisfying and abrupt. You say abrupt like you didn't want the loving movie to end. I liked that the ending felt like it was taken from a Call of Chuthulu game where the DM was getting annoyed at their players and just killed them all off
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Jan 8, 2019 22:19
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I'm watching bird box right now and it's good so far.
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Jan 9, 2019 01:29
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a bone to pick posted:I'm watching bird box right now and it's good so far. no a bone to pick, don't crack, don't let big netflix manipulate you
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Jan 9, 2019 02:04
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find it highly suspicious we have two active threads about this and by suspicious i mean that this was a highly successful marketing push in the demographic of dead internet forums because somethingawful.com just cannot shut the gently caress up about bird box
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Jan 9, 2019 02:06
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if your gonna watch it at least live post it with amusing observations so i need not bother while being otherwise entertained
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Jan 9, 2019 02:07
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I think if u don't like this movie it's probably because ur racist and don't like interracial couples.
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Jan 9, 2019 02:08
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it's just fun to say bird box bird box bird box
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Jan 9, 2019 02:11
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