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FutonForensic posted:"did you install that glory hole at the Three-Toed Sloth enclosure? our core audience is hurting to get their ding-dongs and doorbells slathered with sloth slobber" |
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Mar 1, 2019 14:12
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| # ¿ May 22, 2024 02:18 |
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We have a "deluxe" petting zoo. Less than 50% goats. |
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Mar 1, 2019 14:13
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At first we thought having an Arby's on property would attract customers, but we later realized that the giant sign by the zoo entrance that says "WE GOT THE MEATS" was sending the wrong message. |
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Mar 1, 2019 17:15
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vanisher posted:Also maybe we can hire steve carell for promo stuff Excuse me, we found the bear enclosure, but where is the beet enclosure? |
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Mar 2, 2019 19:33
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(Commercial opens on two guys in an apartment. They appear to be your typical bachelor flatmates except they are sitting straight upright in a pair of kitchen chairs and their complexion is unusually pale.) Guy 1: I am bored. That is a human emotion. Guy 2: Hoo. Boy. Me too. My life lacks stimulation. Guy 1: Hey. I know. We could go to...(slowly turns head toward camera but otherwise remains perfectly still)...the zoo. Guy 2: The...(also turns toward camera)...zoo? Guy 1: Yes. The zoo. That would be pleasing. The zoo. Guy 2. The zoo. Both: Zoo. Zoo. Zoo. (They continue to chant, gradually becoming louder, as they slowly rise from their chairs and walk toward the camera. They reach out, and it almost seems like their hands are beginning to emerge from the screen when there is a sudden jolt of static and it cuts to a different commercial.) |
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Mar 5, 2019 17:43
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