GarfieldEats: I have returned to what I love; cereal boxes and coloring

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > GarfieldEats: I have returned to what I love; cereal boxes and coloring

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Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Caught up with this thread and I'm just so confused and will likely be confused for months to come

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 01:33

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 10:55

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Jim Davis or Paws Inc or whatever the hell is just okay with him being unhinged with their brand?

Because never ever in my life have I been more enticed to consume Garfield Food Items and Garfield related products

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 01:39

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

I stand with #Garfield in these troubling times. Only #Garfield can lead us to The Truth

You, the reader of this post, also stand with #Garfield.

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 16:05

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Why was Arlene pink? Was she hairless? Were her lips stung by bees?

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 19:53

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

he'd just talk endlessly about his struggles of having to watch television in a mansion growing up

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 21:50

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Knormal posted:

Also I found an imposter.
https://www.instagram.com/garfield.eats/

why the hell are her eyelashes coming out from the sides

# ¿ Mar 30, 2020 13:35

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

LordArgh posted:

jon's "meat loaf"

reminder that jon's hog isn't called meat loaf for its shape but for the uncanny texture and oniony aroma

# ¿ Apr 1, 2020 23:05

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Killingyouguy! posted:

nathen's latest instagram story features him shirtless, in case April 2020 wasn't bad enough for you

how is it?

I'm assuming his body is better than mine.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2020 21:42

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

You touch the poop...

It was a #success!

# ¿ Apr 25, 2020 17:57

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

this is outrageous, it is known to all that garfield has complete immunity from all laws, this canadian landlord will be getting a negative "Stars" on my Yelp re-view

# ¿ May 22, 2020 19:49

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

order me a garficcino, please. no dog cum.

# ¿ May 22, 2020 22:40

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Can't be, he is clearly not bored, look at that big smile

# ¿ May 23, 2020 02:27

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

are we to collectively feed nathen to make the nation entergorged?

is this a fetish

# ¿ Jul 25, 2020 00:42

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

GolfHole posted:

CaillouEats

The restaurant where you go to flip out, throw tantrums and toss your food to the floor while the staff look at you, clueless as what to do.

# ¿ Aug 7, 2020 23:01

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Every company has a happiness manager, though...?

# ¿ Nov 26, 2020 22:28

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Frank Frank posted:

What

Legally, you can't run a business without a happiness manager. Like, you can't even open an Etsy shop or have a yard sale or whatever without an appointed member from the National Department of Joy. I really wish you guys would learn the basics of business before attempting "digs" against Nathen and his company when he's actually doing it correctly.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2020 14:51

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

under no circumstances is anyone supposed to set up a gofundme for/give money in any way outside of purchasing items he has listed in legal venues to Nathen Mazri.

Unless this Garfield truck remains in a US goon's hands. What I'm thinking is u order a garfsagna and some garfsangria and pick it up at the border and then deliver it from there. This driver should be paid 300 000 dollars a year for doing very important work.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2020 20:36

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

What veal is to beef, scrappy is to dog.

# ¿ Nov 30, 2020 15:04

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

imagine if the garfsagna was somehow the best tasting lasagna ever? like it makes the lasagnas made by tiny adorable nonas taste like chef boyardee?

# ¿ Dec 3, 2020 00:50

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Agent Escalus posted:

...It was the secret sex tapes with his racist rants that torpedoed him.

I may or may not be in possession of the Racist Garfield Sex tapes and I may or may not release them.

# ¿ Dec 7, 2020 16:49

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

I wish my parents would give me tons of money to be gay elsewhere

# ¿ Jul 23, 2021 18:45

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Zeniel posted:

Big Brent's Chili Cheese dog

The original 3D Brent Butt they used to show at the end of the credits was so ugly and frightening. That's the perfect mascot to sell me cheesy processed saltmeats

# ¿ Jul 26, 2021 13:03

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Nathen should've chose Velma as his cartoon character. That way he could keep the orange sauce and orange everything.

Big Beef City posted:

drat Garf got game, just a powerful lover

drat, who did you piss off to get that avatar/text combo? Hopefully the person who bought you that knows that posts, even angry ones, can't hurt you.

disclaimer because apparently this needs a disclaimer (this post was more about curiosity regarding BBC's av/custom title which yeah I coulda PMed the guy but eh):

Yes posts can absolutely effect you in subtle and not-so-subtle ways. I think most people here know what words are capable of. Posts can alter your heart rate and constrict blood vessels, a particular bad one might even trigger tunnel vision and tinnitus. A post also has the power to make advocates of a less hostile internet experience immediately call someone else a piece of poo poo.

Plant MONSTER. fucked around with this message at 13:22 on Jul 30, 2021

# ¿ Jul 28, 2021 14:15

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Kevin DuBrow posted:

"An Arab and a Jew torn apart by history and brought together as a grocery store to solve the Middle East crisis with one hummus at a time."

...Mazri pictures??

# ¿ Jul 30, 2021 12:35

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Agent Escalus posted:

Anyone can start a production company. Hell, any no-budget 100% independent movie you see at your local film festival, the creators started one to make their project. The fact that Nathen named it after himself is...as exactly what we'd presume he'd do, I guess.

I just expected more creativity. Something like Droopy Dog's Premade-Cinemarinades

# ¿ Aug 1, 2021 04:12

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Has Nathen ever been photographed with his mouth closed, or at least not making that weird gross open-mouthed expression?

It bothers me whenever I see it too. It's hard to explain but for some reason, that open-mouth look plus the pink polo shirt gives me bad smell vibes. A weird breathy and butyric smell.

# ¿ Aug 1, 2021 15:10

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Yeah if you shave the very skin of the orange, you get blissful little slivers packed with those delicious oils. As soon as you get that spongy white pith in there, it gets extremely bitter and astringent and lol I'm imagining just an entire discarded tangerine skin, with the little bit of green stem still attached, floating in a cup of coffee.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2021 17:08

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

Nathan's just hitting that awkward phase where twinks start getting old, they don't get the kind of attention they did when they were younger, it starts getting harder to stay in shape, gets hard to convincingly lie about their age, etc. Some just give up on the hookup life, marry whoever they're currently with, and buy a new wardrobe. Then there's the ones where this completely natural and unavoidable process just snaps their whole entire brains in half.

It's been a ride watching my twink friends experience this, lol. The trick to aging gracefully is to always be gross and fat!!!

# ¿ Oct 16, 2021 20:06

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

goodog posted:

That's absolutely what he meant. He contrasted the screencap of Superman kissing a dude with porn of Garfield eating Odie's rear end .

Oh.

# ¿ Oct 16, 2021 20:07

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

crazy eyes mustafa posted:

He�s gonna end up like the stop kony guy the way this is getting increasingly and publicly unhinged. Isn�t there a morality clause or something that would preclude him from doing all this outrageous stuff with the license or else lose it

There are laws in place for that yes, however, it should be noted that Jim Davis thinks this is the funniest and weirdest poo poo on the planet and he dares not intervene so as not to quell this fine beam of joy that's been lighting up his heart.

# ¿ Oct 16, 2021 20:21

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

my ex is currently trying to push through it and has claimed to be 27 for like over half a decade by now lol

anyway I can't wait to see the Garfield farm theme park Nathan's dreaming up

This is how we end up with 45 year olds with frosted tips!

# ¿ Oct 25, 2021 15:05

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Seth Pecksniff posted:

I like girls who wear Abercrombie and Fitch
I'd take them if I had one wish

lol, oh no, it's mr."i only want attractive people shopping at my stores but I look like a metrosexual orc"

not even one of the sexy orcs.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2021 17:46

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

it's only been like a week into celibacy and he's already posting titty shots. I guess celibacy and posting tiddy aren't technically incompatible but I'm getting mixed signals here.

# ¿ Oct 27, 2021 14:23

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

not to mention the machines at the tissue factories stagger the tissues in a very very precise way that has them folded over eachother slightly so that when you remove a tissue, it pulls out the one that's folded under it so it pops outta the box, ready to be grabbed. If you just toss tissues in there you'll be fishin' for tissues with nasty snot, jizz or mung hands and yuck you just ruined all the tissues.

# ¿ Oct 29, 2021 18:22

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

stay browsed in, we'll be right back after these quick messages!

# ¿ Nov 11, 2021 17:37

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Is his instagram just him getting mad at young women from Saudi Arabia and neighboring countries for the crime of being pretty/wanting to look attractive/owning breasts?

# ¿ Nov 13, 2021 16:25

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

This thread is great for when you want to experience stroke symptoms. Words lose meaning? Can't string sentences together? Objects start to take on rudimentary geometric shapes? It's all there baby

# ¿ Nov 21, 2021 22:31

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

I really hate the whole being over 30 and calling that "youth" thing Nathen does.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2021 13:27

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

he said he was using some trial product called Linum. I don't know if that's a brand name or what but it just means flax? some one found a new way to market flax oil? great?

I don't wanna think about that man's smelly lips any more.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2021 21:22

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 10:55

Plant MONSTER.: Mar 16, 2018; I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Agent Escalus posted:

Spoken like a true shitposter who licks their own suppository for inspiration! And if I got drugged up I�d get banned for intoxicated posting, genius move.

�Anyway�It�s not bad for frozen, which is the whole point.

find an italian grocery store or meat shop or something and buy the homemade lasagnas made by tiny old ladies and don't eat the stouffer's

# ¿ Nov 24, 2021 13:57

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