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Jim and Pam write an elaborate manifesto, explaining that they've been deep cover agents for years and that the time has finally come to initiate Operation: Endgame. Every piece of paper that Dunder Mifflin has ever sold has been dosed with the first part of a 2 part poison compound. Even a single molecule of the poison is enough to kill a person, and the 2nd part of the compound is an invisible air-borne toxin that will unknowingly be spread across the US via devices installed on passenger planes. The only way to stop it would be to ground every plane in the US. They "accidentally" leave this on the printer for Dwight to find. Dwight finds it and at first believes it, until he discovers several obvious typos and a reference to an obscure Battlestar Galactica novel. Dwight happily shreds the manifesto and mocks Jim for coming up with such a ridiculous plan. The next day Dwight wakes up and finds Mose's corpse at the foot of his bed. He looks out the window and sees hundreds of fires blazing in the distance. Leaving his farm, he finds all of Scranton littered with corpses and signs of mayhem. Crashed cars, buildings on fire, and even planes that have dropped out of the sky. He heads to Dunder Mifflin, where Jim and Pam are happily typing away at their desks. "Hey Dwight. Crazy traffic out there today, right?" "Jim, what happened? How did you do this? Why did you let me live?" "I gave you the antidote in your coffee yesterday. You're the only person left alive besides Pam and me. Welcome to the family, buddy!" "MICHAEL! MICHAEL! MICHAEL!" Smash cut to Michael's corpse at his desk as the Office theme starts up.
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Mar 18, 2019 14:42
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Jim gains omnipotence and erases Dwight's entire family from existence along with his beet farm, Battlestar Galactica, paintball, and everything else Dwight ever loved. Dwight is left a depressed husk without anything enjoyable in his life. "Hey Dwight, how's Mose doing?" "Who? Why do I know that name? Why am I crying right now?" "I said how's your nose doing? You okay there buddy?" Dwight attempts to kill himself that night but Jim sits outside his window and keeps rewinding time when Dwight's about to pull the trigger on the shotgun in his mouth. Eventually the deja vu gets to be too much and Dwight collapses from frustration and terror. He cries himself to sleep and mutters "Mose" in his sleep again and again. Jim smugly smiles at the camera.
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Mar 18, 2019 15:18
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Jim hires an actor to pretend to be Dwight's long lost half-brother. Dwight is initially cautious and unsure, but the man shares information that seems to prove he's who he is (this is because Jim has been bugging Dwight's house and phone for years). Dwight welcomes the man into his family and enjoys the happiest year of his life, having met another person who he feels a profound, spiritual connection to. Dwight tells the man that this has opened his eyes, that it's time to be a better person and more open to others. It's time to stop pushing people away, time to stop being so arrogant and rude to others. It's time for Dwight to help the world. He's prepared to quit his job, sell his world possessions, and begin a life devoted solely to making others happier. At this point the man stabs Dwight in the stomach and yells out "YOU JUST GOT PRANKED, JIM SAYS APRIL FOOLS!" before running off, never to be seen again.
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Mar 18, 2019 15:43
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Jim gains access to the multiverse and kidnaps a 2nd Dwight from a universe almost identical to our own. He brings this Dwight back to Dunder Mifflin, at which point the Original Dwight shows up for work. Each Dwight believes the other is an impostor hired by Jim, leading to a huge fight and one Dwight knocking out the other one. Jim "admits" he set the whole thing up, then offers to take the unconscious Dwight back home. We see Jim drag Dwight upstairs into his attic, then a muffled gunshot. Jim leaves and the camera crew sneaks into the attic to see what happened. There are hundreds of dead bodies in various states of decay, all of them wearing mustard yellow shirts.
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Mar 18, 2019 16:25
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Jim hires an actor to pretend to be a ghost and follow Dwight around. Dwight becomes obsessed with the idea that he must lay the spirit to rest, and begins solving every unsolved case in Scranton's history. Several lose ends in murder cases cause him to discover the existence of a serial killer he dubs "The Dollman", who preys on children because he himself never mentally grew out of adolescence. As Dwight refines the profile he begins to understand that the Dollman could only be one man - Michael Scott. Inviting him over to the farm under the guise of playing paintball, Dwight comes to terms with the fact that he may have to kill his boss if he refuses to cooperate. When Michael arrives at the farm his usual joyful façade falls away and he admits everything, thanking Dwight for finally "letting the world see the genius of Michael Scott". He gives Dwight a map showing him where the dozens of murdered children were buried, a taped recording of his confession, and a photo album which Michael warns Dwight not to view if he values his innocence. Michael then shoots himself in the head, closing the case of the Dollman forever. The entire time the actor is going "WoooooOOOOOOOooooooooOOOOO!" and making it really hard for Dwight to concentrate.
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Mar 18, 2019 17:49
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Jim gets access to a time machine and uses it to torment Dwight at various points in his life. Dwight's first friend, who he met in preschool? Jim pushes the kid in front of a car before he ever makes it to school. The amazing catch Dwight made in little league to win the big game? Jim dug a hole in the outfield and little Dwight tripped over it, missing the ball. The first kiss Dwight got at a middle school dance? Jim burns down the school in the middle of the dance, killing 15 kids including the girl Dwight kissed in the original timeline. Modern Dwight can feel his mind slipping and his body deteriorating as Jim makes these cruel alterations to the timeline, eventually culminating in Jim crashing a car into Michael on the day he was going to re-hire Dwight from Staples (Season 3, Episode 14). Dwight, now a physically frail and mentally unstable man working at Staples for 40 years, returns home to find a box addressed from his old co-worker, Jim Halpert. It contains proof of Dwight's old life - wedding photos with Angela, drawings that his 3 children drew of their family, even his nameplate from the office saying "DWIGHT K SCHUTE - REGIONAL MANAGER". The final piece is the eulogy Jim wrote for the alternate Dwight, explaining the beautiful life he lived and all of the small moments that made him who he was. These moments are all alien to Dwight, every "happy" memory in this eulogy is a bitter, sad day for him. The final paragraph of the eulogy reads as follows "I don't know what kind of person Dwight might have become had these events transpired differently. I don't suppose he'd be a very happy man. He'd be a broken man in many ways, and the worst punishment of all would be to show him what could have been. It would take a real monster to do that."
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Mar 18, 2019 18:25
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Jim slyly edits a prank from years ago, then mugs for the camera, wondering if anyone will ever catch it.
A Fancy Hat fucked around with this message at 18:18 on Nov 15, 2022 |
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Mar 18, 2019 18:53
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Jim uses alchemy to create a tiny homunculus, standing about 2 feet tall, that looks and acts like Dwight. He brings it to the office before Dwight arrives and sets it at his desk. When Dwight arrives the homunculus begins screeching and clawing its own face off.
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Mar 19, 2019 11:52
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Jim kills himself in front of Dwight, scarring Dwight for life and causing Dunder Mifflin to eventually shut down as nobody wants to work in that office any more. Three months into unemployment, Dwight sees Jim sitting at a restaurant. He walks up to him and is convinced it's Jim, but the man is sitting with a different family and nobody knows who "Jim Halpert" is and the family members all produce photographs as proof that this isn't a prank. Convinced it's still a trick, Dwight sneaks outside Pam's house to see if Jim's there. He watches Pam through the window playing with the kids, then she slowly turns towards the window and locks eyes with Dwight. She smiles and Dwight sees that her teeth are filed down to sharp points. She points and the kids open their mouths to show they also have the filed down cannibal teeth. They start to run for the front door, screaming and laughing. Dwight drives home as quickly as he can and sees a fire burning in his front yard. He puts it out and finds human bones there. The police are called and discover that the bones belong to a homeless person who went missing several months ago. Dwight doesn't tell them the story about Pam, but simply says he was out for a night drive before finding the bones. One of the cops suggest Dwight set up some cameras around the farm, just to be safe. The next morning Dwight heads into the city to buy security cameras when a cop pulls him over. He looks at the man and realizes it's the Jim lookalike from the restaurant. He's about to make a joke about what a small world it is when the cop shoots him twice in the gut. "My kids are starving, Dwight, you have to understand that's the only reason I did this. They're so hungry and they just keep screaming!" Dwight hears his passenger door open up, followed by the same screaming laughter from last night.
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Mar 19, 2019 13:35
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Jim tells Dwight he's created a robot that can sell paper better than any human salesman. In walks what looks like a person wearing a bunch of cardboard boxes covered in tin foil. Dwight, angry at what looks like a childish prank, rips the cardboard head off the "robot", expecting a human to be underneath. Instead, he exposes a bundle of wires and hoses, one of which begins spraying oil like a sliced artery. Dwight looks at the carboard robot head in his hands, realizing that it's actually a super advanced robot. The head begins screaming "INITIATE SELF DESTRUCT MODE" as Dwight starts yelling in shock and terror.
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Mar 19, 2019 15:28
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Jim pushes all the clocks forward 3 hours, so Dwight thinks it's later than it is. At "5 pm" Dwight gets ready to leave the office, but first he takes his regular 5 pm insulin shot. However, since it's actually 2 pm, Dwight overdoses on insulin and passes out from the low blood sugar. Jim mugs for the camera as Dwight starts his 2nd seizure.
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Mar 19, 2019 16:01
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Dwight and Angela are happily married and raising their child for years, when Dwight begins to notice something odd about their son - he looks a lot like a younger version of Jim. As the boy ages it becomes obvious, once he's 12 years old Dwight recognizes he looks exactly like a photo of a young Jim that he once saw. Enraged and confused, he heads to Jim and Pam's house, only to discover it's burnt down years ago. Researching what happens, he discovers that Jim murdered his children in cold blood, then killed himself. Pam was committed to a mental institution after that night, where she still resides. Dwight spends the weekend venturing to the mental institution, leaving Angela and their son alone. He manages to find the place and a doctor allows him to speak to Pam, warning him that she "can be disturbing to visitors and new employees." Pam has drawn over the walls of her room, making it look like the old Dunder Mifflin office. When the orderly open the door, she answers "Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam." Although now in her 50s and ravaged by time and poor hygiene due to deteriorating mental state, Dwight still sees a light in her eyes that reminds him of the past. It distracts him for a moment, and he almost doesn't realize she's missing both her arms. "Jim told me to chew them off, isn't that funny? What a good prank! Hey Dwight, have you seen Andy around? I need to give him a note from Erin." Dwight realizes immediately that this is pointless, Pam has been utterly broken by her life with Jim and will offer no information that he couldn't find elsewhere. But he desperately asks one question - why did Jim do it? "Oh Dwight, you still don't understand what he is, do you? Why do you think he played all those pranks on you? Why do you think we got married at Niagara Falls? What do you think was buried there, millions of years ago, that still called out to him? Did you ever look at his screen at work? What he was typing? When he showed me that I understood, the kids understood, too. That's why they had to die! That's why he left me here, to be his herald!" Dwight, disturbed on a level he can't understand, drives all night to return home. He's exhausted but craves the affection of his wife and child. They'll go see a doctor tomorrow, best to let the dead stay dead. Dwight arrives at the farm and notices all the lights are out. Everyone must be asleep, he thinks to himself. He reaches for the doorknob, only to pull his hand back when he feels a cold, slimy substance. Jello? Who would put jello around the doorknob?
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Mar 19, 2019 17:48
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Dwight keeps getting headaches which are getting worse and worse. He takes off work early to relax at home and puts on the movie "A Quiet Place." He realizes that the actor, John Krasinski, looks a lot like Jim. He looks on the internet movie database and discovers that Krasinki played a character named "Jim Halpert" on a TV show called the Office. Scared, Dwight keeps reading and realizing that his entire life has been fictionalized on a TV show. His headaches get worse as he feels the walls of reality begin to slip. How hadn't he recognized Steve Carell? Did he just think Michael look a lot like him? How did nobody ever comment on that? Dwight starts to hear church bells in the distance, growing louder. He realizes now that his house is sparesly furnished and that everything is just a prop. He goes to turn on the TV but it doesn't work, and when he turns around he sees that an entire wall is missing, open into a darkened studio. He's inside a huge studio lot and it's silent except for those bells getting louder and louder. "Oh Dwight, I never wanted you to find out like this..." Jim or John, Dwight isn't sure what to call him yet, is sitting in a director's chair. "You can call me either name, or both, or none at all. I've gone by so many names they no longer have any meaning to me." Dwight, terrified, convinces himself he's in a bad dream. He tries to will himself awake. But like before, Jim seems to have read his mind. "Are you Dwight or are you Rainn Wilson? It's hard to remember, isn't it? You know, I had a bad dream once. When I woke up I had created this Universe, and then They locked me away when they saw the monstrous thing I had built. Can you blame Them?" Dwight begs Jim to end this prank, to just kill him or let him wake up or anything at all. Just stop it. "Oh Rainn, haven't you heard? They're doing a reunion season. Everybody's very excited to see what Dwight's been up to. Do you want to help me write the ending? I was thinking that I put your stapler in jello for old time's sake." Dwight is crying now, unable to comprehend what's happening. Jim has moved over and now stands over Dwight, somehow standing at least 20 feet tall. His limbs are thin and elongated, and his eyes are black pits with flames burning deep within them. His voice is now 100 voices, each screaming over the other ones, trying to be heard. His hot breath falls on Dwight/Rainn and smells of sulfur. "Maybe this time Andy won't be so loving ANNOYING!!!!!"
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Mar 19, 2019 18:26
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Dwight gets into work early with the intent of pranking Jim for once. When he gets to Dunder Mifflin, there's no building, just an empty lot. Confused, he tries calling security but nobody answers the phone. Suddenly he hears a rumbling sound and the ground starts to shake. Dunder Mifflin starts to slowly rise out of the ground. Dwight stares in shock and feels a hand clap his back. He turns around - it's Jim. "It gets more beautiful every morning, Dwight."
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Mar 20, 2019 12:17
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JIm brings Dwight a box of chocolate covered cherries to apologize for the years of pranks. Dwight, convinced it's a trick, smashes one with a hammer. Just a chocolate covered cherry. Dwight smashes one more to be safe. Again, just a chocolate covered cherry. He eats the 3rd one and the second he bites down, Stanley is chopped in half by an unseen force. "You got the Stanley one, Dwight. Too bad you smashed the Pam and Gabe ones before you figured it out." Dwight glances over his shoulder and sees a pool of blood oozing out from behind the Pam's desk.
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Mar 20, 2019 13:16
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Dwight uses a vacation day and Jim hides in his bushes to watch what he does. Noticing that Dwight is playing Majora's Mask on an emulator, Jim gets to work. When Dwight wakes up the next day he turns on the news and sees that every channel is filled with breaking news about the moon falling out of orbit. It's going to hit the Earth in 72 hours and destroy life as we know it, and there's nothing we can do to stop it. Dwight runs outside and looks in the sky, seeing Jim's smug face carved into the moon. Dawn of the First Day.
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Mar 20, 2019 18:46
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Jim invites Dwight over to his house for a dinner party. When Dwight gets there he's disturbed to find someone who looks exactly lie himself, wearing a tuxedo, and apparently acting as Jim's butler. Looking closer, Dwight notices the obvious scars of a lobotomy - just what the hell has Jim done now? "Oh, I noticed you admiring my manservant. Pam and I decided to get one to help with the kids. Weird, now I'm noticing how much he looks like you!" Disturbed, Dwight is led to the dining room by Jim. Everything seems normal, the food smells good and Jim's butler is setting the table for everyone. But then Dwight realizes that Pam and the kids are nowhere to be seen. Jim sits down on the table and starts drinking a glass of wine. He finishes it in 2 large gulps, then yells for his butler to bring more. Jim finishes 4 more glasses in this same way, then lets out a powerful belch. Dwight hears movement in the kitchen and is comforted by it - at least somebody else is here. It must be Pam, or maybe one of the kids. The kitchen door opens and Michael Scott walks out, looking like he's in a daze. Dwight is overjoyed to see his friend - but doesn't he live in Colorado with his wife and kids? What is he doing here? And why does he look so confused? Then he answers his own question when he notices those tell-tale lobotomy scars. Dwight gets up to run but it's too late, Jim is standing behind him and Dwight feels something poking into his back. Something cold and metal. "Sit down DWIGHT, sit the gently caress down and enjoy a meal with my family. Michael - can you grab Pam and the kids out of the oven? Oh.... whoops - oh it looks like I spoiled the surprise a bit early. That's okay, though, I never was good at keeping secrets!" Dwight is crying now, he knows that he's not leaving this house alive. He begs Jim to let him go, or at least explain what he's doing. "I'm having a dinner party with my best friends. Can I get you a glass of wine? It's an amazing vintage Kevin." Jim begins laughing maniacally as Dwight makes eye contact with the butler. The butler begins to cry.
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Mar 21, 2019 15:35
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Dwight is about to eat a beet sandwich for lunch. Jim uses his time machine to travel back in time and make billions of tiny alterations to the timeline. Dwight's beet sandwich is replaced with a cheese sandwich right as Dwight bites into it. "Bleh... I thought I packed a beet sandwich today.... why would I pack a cheese sandwich?" Jim smiles at the camera. In the background, Meredith has been replaced by a 7 foot tall crow with glowing green eyes.
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Mar 22, 2019 13:21
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Jim becomes an advisor to the UN and intentionally sabotages several key treaties in order to lead the world into World War 3. Dwight volunteers but is disqualified as someone wrote "has paranoid fantasies of being pranked by Jim Halpert" on his medical evaluation. It was Jim. He mugs for the camera while Dwight sits in the office and nuclear bombs destroy the American Midwest.
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Mar 22, 2019 15:15
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"Dwight, hey buddy, you okay? The operation's all over!" Dwight wearily opens his eyes and looks around. He's in a hospital bed, but he doesn't remember going in for an operation. Was he sick? Did something happen? He tries to stretch and realizes, with a growing terror, that he can't feel his legs. He can see them under the covers of the bed, and he almost swears they're moving, but he can't feel them. "Oh yeah, the leg thing. Listen, this is going to take a bit of an adjustment, but I think you'll get used to not having any legs anymore. I mean, I did let you keep the arms, didn't I?" Dwight feels sick to his stomach now as he slowly clenches his fists. Thank God he can at least feel those. What the hell happened? What kind of accident was he in? And why is Jim's voice so loud? "You always had stronger arms than me, I'm a big enough guy to admit that. But I couldn't have you running away, so that's why we kept my legs. Pretty good idea, huh?" Dwight starts to feel his chest, moving very carefully to be sure he doesn't unplug anything that needs plugged in or loosen any bandages that need to stay on. His upper chest feels sore, and strange. He feels a weird lump and cautiously moves around it. Below the lump there's something warm and wet - an open wound? Oh God, they forgot to sew something closed! Then the wound starts to move - starts to talk. "Hey buddy, keep your fingers out of our mouth, okay? Jeez, were you raised in a barn? Actually, that might explain some things...." Dwight has already figured it out, but uses his fingers to confirm the awful horror. He feels the lump, more confidently this time, and understands exactly what it is. He slowly moves his fingers and feels two fuzzy bumps which flutter at his touch. Two eyes. Yes. Yes of course. Two eyes to go with a nose. Add a mouth, and you have a whole face, don't you? "Pretty good prank, isn't it? I sewed my face on your chest! And now I work everything below the belt - THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" The Jim-face laughs maniacally and Dwight's chest burns with pain. He can feel stitches tearing and sore muscles screaming in pain. Dwight's screaming now, too, even though he hasn't realized it yet.
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Mar 26, 2019 17:10
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Jim finishes writing his magnum opus - The Anti-Bible, preaching the Word of the almighty idiot Un-God. He converts most of Scranton to his religion, all of this unbeknownst to Dwight. A hot sales lead comes in, and Jim tells Dwight that the best way to get the sale would be to attend church with the client, since he's a very religious man. Dwight agrees, and heads off to the Bone Chapel of Scranton, headquarters for Jim's Anti-Religion. Dwight sits through the entire ceremony, from the ritual of the weeping shadows to the consumption of the bone shavings. At the end of the 4 hour long event Jim bursts out of the ornamental Womb of Unbecoming and announces that he already signed the contract with Dwight's client. But, Dwight's made such a good impression on the congregation that he's being offered up as a sacrifice to the Un-God. As Dwight is slowly and painfully erased from existence by the Powers of the Idiot Un-God, Jim smugly smiles at the camera.
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Apr 1, 2019 18:10
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Jim stands in front of Dwight's desk on one gray December morning, bends to his ear, and whispers "They're here." He then collapses dead of a massive stroke. Dwight is haunted by this bizarre event and spends the following 2 days distraught. He attends Jim's funeral where Pam begs him to explain what Jim said before his death. Dwight, feeling that he must protect whatever bizarre secret Jim told him, simply says that Jim's last words were "I love Pam." That night Dwight hears a tapping on his bedroom window and awakens to see 2 glowing red eyes peering in. By the time he gets out of bed the eyes have disappeared and there's no sign that anything was outside the window. Dwight takes a personal day off of work the next day. Trying to clear his mind, Dwight picks up one of his favorite books. The book has been hollowed out, and tucked inside is a glass vial with a neon blue liquid in it. Suspended in the liquid is a tiny metal ball with a long, hair-thin wire attached to it. When he touches the vial he can feel it faintly vibrating. He is startled by the sudden sound of a truck driving away outside and drops the vial, which shatters. The blue liquid smells vaguely of Jim's cologne. The metal ball rolls into the crack between two floorboards and falls into the basement. Dwight decides to focus on the truck first and looks outside, finding a giant wooden crate placed by his mailbox. Suddenly he hears a pounding sound coming from the basement. The cameraman filming all of this suddenly turns the camera on himself. It's Jim.
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Apr 4, 2019 15:21
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Jim reveals the secret of the universe to Dwight - our souls aren't trapped in our bodies, but our bodies are trapped in our souls. The creatures we call Gods are merely reflections and shadows of what's really in charge, and to truly perceive the order of the universe you would need to observe every moment occurring concurrently. There's a war going on but nobody knows it, and the bad guys have already won. Then Jim jumps off the top of Dunder Mifflin, leaving Dwight alone with this revelation. Dwight looks over the ledge and sees Jim's body laying there. Suddenly, several men dressed in fox hunting outfits walk into the parking lot. One of them is holding a sickle and looks up on the roof, making eye contact with Dwight. He begins to yell and the men head for the front door and Dwight feels a pulsing in the back of his head as the Sun starts to turn bright red. 3 years earlier, but at the same time, Jim smiles at the camera and says "I wonder if Dwight's ready for the world I just unlocked for him."
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Jun 10, 2019 20:41
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Jim challenges Dwight to a fight, claiming that he has learned a new "Super Karate" that can beat all other martial arts. Dwight is annoyed but ignores it, and Jim continues to annoy him all day. It finally culminates with Jim karate kicking Dwight's mug off the table, so Dwight accepts the fight. They head out to the parking lot and Dwight is surrounded by a dozen men wearing black bodysuits and featureless masks. "You have to prove yourself to me, Dwight! You have no chance against me unless you can defeat my disciples!" Dwight fights them off and gets ready to attack Jim, but suddenly feels dizzy. He sits down for a second and his vision goes blurry. Jim places a hand on his shoulder and leans in closely. "Those were cops, Dwight. I dosed you with a powerful drug earlier today that leaves you open to suggestion. I convinced you they were my disciples with just a few trigger words throughout the day. You beat up 12 cops, Dwight. I applaud you for the show of rebellion but I'm afraid the authorities might not take such a progressive view of your actions." Suddenly Dwight sees a red dot appear on his chest and slowly move up towards his head.
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Jun 11, 2019 12:36
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Jim doses Dwight with a powerful, experimental hallucinogen code named "DUNDER MIFFLIN INFINITY". It makes Dwight extremely susceptible to suggestions and Jim convinces Dwight he's a giant glass of beet juice and then sets him down in a local grocery store. Dwight goes insane when someone touches him and becomes convinced he's "spilled" everywhere, leaving him a catatonic mess that slowly wastes away.
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Jul 1, 2019 18:32
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Jim removes Dwight's aura, making him more susceptible to psychic parasites and extradimensional beings. Meanwhile, Jim creates a series of fake books entitled "The Beet Farmer's Guide to Your Chakras" and convinces Dwight to purchase them and follow the instructions. Jim has purposely written the books so as to make one vulnerable to an ancient psychic demon which exists on the outer realms of the mindscape. Dwight makes contact with the creature, but the book instructs him that it's merely the Soul of All Beets. Dwight is mentally shredded by the beast and turned into a husk, worn by the psychic demon as it begins its dark work of destroying humanity. Jim is seen in the kitchen eating lunch with "Dwight", and they both mug for the camera.
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Jul 5, 2019 14:00
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Jim removes every mirror in the office and replaces them with expensive screens that show footage of a bear walking by, matching Dwight's movements when he walks past. Dwight is slowly driven to believe he is a bear, even going into hibernation at the start of winter. While he's sleeping Jim burns down Schrute Farms.
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Mar 23, 2020 13:01
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Jim enlists the whole office for his most epic prank ever - convincing Dwight that he's being haunted by a vengeful spirit after his last trip to Japan. Dwight nervously admits that he spent time inside a "disgraced temple" which believes led to the haunting. Meredith dresses up in a long white dress and wears a black wig covering her entire face to play the part of the spooky spirit! The haunting goes on subtly at first, until they amp things up and start haunting Dwight at home, too. Insane with fear and anger, Dwight stabs Meredith with a "blessed samurai blade", killing her instantly. Jim, barely able to contain himself at this point, tells Dwight with a laugh that this was all an incredible prank and that Dwight is going to be spending a long time in prison. Once he gets to prison Dwight discovers that he really IS being haunted by a vengeful Japanese spirit, and now he's also being haunted by Meredith's spirit! I wonder what kind of shenanigans they'll get up to in the newest office spinoff, coming this fall.... Dwight, Two Ghosts, and a Prison Cell! Thursday at 8/7c.
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Mar 23, 2020 15:31
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Jim sells everything he owns to finance an amazing musical entitled "DWIGHT: THE MUSICAL". He puts flyers up around the office, arousing suspicion and anger from Dwight. Dwight goes to see the musical after Jim offers him a free ticket. He's moved to tears by the effort that went into researching his life and turning it into a beautifully scored musical. The final scenes of the show begin with the fictionalized Dwight stepping into the theater to see the very musical currently being performed. The feel on stage quickly shifts as the actor mimics the actions of the real Dwight perfectly. Another actor enters the scene, spotlight following them, and says "Thus we come to the end of Dwight. The curtain falls and he is no more." Dwight begins to scream and his actor does too.
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Mar 23, 2020 17:04
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Jim invents a hyper-advanced AI and builds a realistic robot shaped like a child. He programs the robot child to believe Dwight is his father. Dwight adopts the robot boy out of the kindness of his heart and begins to bond him with, relishing the opportunity to be both a father and a pioneer into human/robot relationships. After 5 years, Jim sneaks into Dwight's house and attacks him with a knife. Dwight's robot son comes to his father's aid and fights off Jim, knocking him down to the ground and disarming him. Jim begins laughing and then snaps his own neck. When the police arrive they find fake videos that Jim uploaded to his creation, making it appear that Dwight told his robot son to kidnap Jim and murder him "to make up for all the pranks". Dwight is given the death penalty and his robot son is shut down permanently. Miles away, Pam downloads a file to her computer called JIM.EXE. She opens it, and the computer mugs for the camera.
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Mar 24, 2020 19:35
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Jim convinces Dwight that if you plant a sesame seed, you'll get a hamburger tree. Despite being a farmer, Dwight believes it thanks to Jim's extensive use of photoshop, faked videos, and paying several members of the FDA to attest that this can in fact happen. Dwight plants hundreds of sesame seeds on his farm, dreaming of a bumper crop of delicious burgers. That night, Jim sneaks onto the farm with a large meteorite in tow. He cracks it open with a hammer and pours a strange glowing liquid all over the field. He mugs for the camera and silently mouths "METEOR poo poo". The next day Dwight awakens to find most of his farm coated in a green moss-like plant. It's rapidly growing and, when he touches it, it ends up sticking to his body. Hoping to wash it off, he hops into a bath. Unfortunately, this only causes the plant to spread, covering most of his body. Thus begins Dwight's descent into terror, next time on the Office!
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Mar 25, 2020 13:48
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Jim writes a series of angry and rambling letters to the major TV networks, threatening violence unless they "BRING BACK BATTLESTAR GALACTICA NOW!" He spills beet juice on each one and includes several hairs he's stolen from Dwight. The FBI arrives at the Office to question Dwight, who adamantly denies writing the letters. Jim eggs on Dwight, saying "Oh, so you don't like Battlestar Galactica? Okay, good to know." Dwight screams that he loves the show and it's a crime it was cancelled, leading the FBI to have probably cause to detain him. Jim then goes to the abandoned Schrute Farms and sits, silently, for hours in the middle of a field. When the sun sets he slowly stands up, strips nude, and then walks into Dwight's house. He is never seen again.
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Mar 25, 2020 15:30
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Jim writes an elaborate science fiction novel under the pen name "J.H. Palpert". It becomes a huge success and spawns a popular movie franchise. A decade later, Dwight has become a huge fan of the franchise, declaring it "Better than Battlestar Galactica". One Halloween, Dwight dresses up at the main character from the franchise, Slight Droop. Jim mentions that Slight Droop kind of sounds like Dwight Schrute, and that the fictional character actually shares a lot in common with Dwight. Dwight is left with an uneasy feeling for the rest of the day.
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Mar 27, 2020 13:19
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Jim solves the mystery of Jack the Ripper, revealing it to be a relative of Dwight's. He also reveals that 98% of serial killers in throughout history are at least distantly related to Dwight. This leads to speculation of the "Dwight Gene", a genetic marker that would identify future sociopathic behavior in children when they're born. Dwight is enraged and attacks Jim, believing it to all be an elaborate prank. Jim simply says "There's the proof, he can't help it, the Dwight Gene is telling him to kill." As Dwight is hauled away, the camera shows where Jim has hastily scratched out "JIM HALPERT GENE" and replaced it with "DWIGHT SCHRUTE GENE". He mugs for the camera as a fly lands on his face and crawls around. Jim doesn't react at all.
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Mar 31, 2020 20:18
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Jim buys DNA tests for the whole office for "fun", and it turns out that Dwight, Jim, and Michael are all distantly related. Michael loves the idea that he has "two brothers" and proposes a guy's night out. Jim eagerly agrees, which Dwight finds out of character. Nevertheless, Dwight considers this a great opportunity to bond with Michael and appreciates family, so he agrees. Jim proposes that they meet up at the park for a picnic, and Michael rushes home to "make some potato salad". A few hours later, Dwight arrives at the picnic and sees Jim but not Michael. Jim has a stroller with him, and beckons Dwight over. "Jim, is that your baby? I thought your children were older." "It's a baby, Dwight. Do you want to know his name?" Dwight looks closer. The baby does look familiar. "He's named Michael, but I think you already knew that. Say hi, Michael, you remember Dwight, right?" Dwight takes another look and realizes this isn't a baby, not a baby at all. It's just shaped like a baby, but the skin is aged and wrinkled, the eyes have a terrifying clarity behind them, and the mouth is full of teeth. "Say hi to your brother, Dwight! Don't worry, I have two more strollers for us, too." Dwight begins to scream and the baby-thing follows suit while Jim smiles smugly at the camera.
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Mar 19, 2021 19:16
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Dwight successfully crowdfunds a reunion for the stars of Battlestar Galactica and, riding the hype, even gets the show greenlit for an additional season on television. Dwight is overjoyed and tells the entire office about the success, then flies out to Hollywood to supervise the first episode. Everything is going incredibly well. The show looks amazing, everyone on set loves Dwight, and Dwight is truly happy for the first time in a very long time. Days pass and the first episode is shaping up to be a new pinnacle in scifi storytelling, Dwight is moved to tears by the beauty of it and early buzz already says it will absolutely be an Emmy award winning episode. The future of Battlestar Galactica is brighter than it's ever been before. Then Dwight receives a phone call from a frantic Jim. Jim breathlessly explains that Pam is dying of a rare medical disorder that will take "millions of dollars" of experimental surgery to fix. Worst of all, Jim dejectedly explains, he never got insurance for either of them because "I'm too stupid, Dwight, I'm just too stupid." Dwight, hearing this, rushes on set and explains everything. The cast, moved to tears by their love of Dwight, donate the money necessary to fund Pam's surgery. The show finishes filming without Dwight and moves into post-production. Dwight gives Jim the money for Pam's surgery and, seemingly by fate, she finishes her final surgery on the night that Battlestar Galactica: Further Worlds debuts. The show is beautiful and incredibly well-written. Dwight sits by Pam's side in the hospital and sees his creation take shape on the screen. He can hear that everyone else in the hospital is transfixed and watching the show and feels pride swell in his chest. The show is nearly finished and Dwight is happier than he's ever been, when the post-credit stinger appears on screen. It's a poorly written note, seemingly inserted last minute into the show, as if someone snuck it in. HEY DWIGHT PAM WASN'T EVEN SICK WE SPENT THAT MONEY ON HAIR GEL AND CHILI'S SUCK IT LOVE JIM AND PAM Dwight looks back at the hospital bed and realizes it's not Pam he's been sitting by, it's Kevin.
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Mar 22, 2021 13:02
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Dwight receives a letter in the mail inviting him to "The Ultimate Martial Arts Tournament". Dwight recognizes this as a prank of Jim's, but decides to turn the tables on Jim. He shows up at the listed address and, to Jim's credit, it appears legit. Dwight enters the arena and mingles with several other entrants in the tournament, all of whom seem to be playing their part perfectly. Dwight gets signed up and marvels at how much time and money Jim must have spent on this prank, while revealing to the camera crew that he plans to "take a dive" in the first round to disrupt whatever plan Jim has. Dwight watches the preliminary matches and marvels at them. These fights appear 100% legit, with combatants using a variety of authentic martial arts. Finally, after 6 matches, Dwight is called to floor. His opponent appears and looks like Jim wearing a cheap beard and wig. Chuckling to himself, Dwight instantly falls to the ground clutching his knee when the match begins. When his opponent comes to check on him, Dwight puts him in a headlock and attempts to remove the fake beard and wig. However, it doesn't come off, no matter how hard he pulls. To his horror, Dwight then sees Jim in the audience, smiling smugly. Dwight releases the hold and tries to apologize, but it's too late, he is stripped of all his martial arts accomplishments and awards and banned from ever participating in any kind of martial art for life. Dejected, Dwight leaves the arena and sees Jim and the bearded man laughing. The bearded man pulls off his beard and wig, revealing it is Jim. "Jim" pulls of a mask, revealing himself to be a bearded old man that looks like Jim in a bad wig and beard.
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Mar 22, 2021 16:44
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Jim and the whole office attend Dwight's Dungeons and Dragons game. Jim creates a character named "Schrute the Incontinent" and makes him act like a bumbling dwarf version of Dwight. As the game nearly ends, he asks Dwight if Schrute the Incontinent cane come into the real world to kill and replace Dwight. Dwight laughs, but Jim is insistent. Seeking to shut him up, Dwight says if Jim rolls a 20 one-thousand times in a row, Schrute will become real. Jim does this and Dwight hears a knocking on his front door.
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Mar 22, 2021 17:10
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Jim builds an endless staircase in the Dunder Mifflin building, trapping Dwight. 50 years later the building is about to be demolished when one of the planners notices that building measurements don't add up - there's a stairwell you can see from the outside that has no exit inside the building. Cautiously, they approach the stairwell and leave the door open. The expedition quickly turns into a nightmare as thousands of bodies in various states of decay are discovered on the staircase. Most frightening of all, the staircase extends beyond the physical limitations of the building. Weeks later, a skeleton wearing mustard yellow tatters is pulled out by scientists, discovered over 6 miles up the mysterious stairway. A smug looking man asks one of the scientists if they think that's the last one. "We can only hope so, son. Whoever built this was some kind of mad genius, we don't know what the hell is going on here at all." The smug man smiles, smugly, and walks off.
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Mar 22, 2021 17:24
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| # ¿ May 14, 2024 21:36 |
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Jim summons Pumpkinhead, seeking vengeance against Dwight for eating the last donut that Michael brought into the office.
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Mar 22, 2021 18:11
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