sitting is the new smoking

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > sitting is the new smoking

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

uber driver rolls up, i step inside and ask "do you mind if i sit in here?"
he sighs and rolls down the window next to me

# ? Mar 28, 2019 04:29

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 6, 2024 21:13

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

"as a reminder, please note that the no sitting light will be on for the duration of the flight. it is a federal crime to sit in the lavatory"

# ? Mar 28, 2019 04:29

xcheopis

My sit/stand work station has been swapped out for a stand/hand-stand one.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 04:45

Macnult

we get it, you crouch

# ? Mar 28, 2019 04:51

FlaxAxis: sup #entitlitos

ayo can i cop a squat man? I'll get you back I swear

vanisher = sig champ

# ? Mar 28, 2019 05:06

Macnult

_{where is my chair} where is my chair!!??

# ? Mar 28, 2019 05:33

redm

[sits] ... ahh thats so much better

_{sig by Manifisto}

# ? Mar 28, 2019 07:03

Fredrik1: Gopherslayer

sir, please sit in the sitting room.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 09:47

Goons Are Gifts

Real men poo poo while lying, sitting is for the weak

# ? Mar 28, 2019 11:56

google THIS

Sneaking outside with no jacket during the family Christmas party to use the porch rocker, hoping Aunt May doesn't notice.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 16:56

google THIS

A group of teenagers hanging out outside Sofa Express for no apparent reason, sizing up everyone who walks in.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 16:59

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

movie scene has a period correct 1970's newsroom

"hah, wow. can you imagine working in an environment like that?! everyone is sitting down. inside!"

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:04

google THIS

Health teacher: This is what a healthy butt looks like...(click-whirrrrr-rrrrr-click)...and this is a sitter's butt.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:06

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

I feel as if I've been standing my entire life and I just sat down.

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:07

google THIS

I'm too comfortable to post in BYOB

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:19

vanisher

google THIS posted:

I'm too comfortable to post in BYOB

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:20

Fredrik1: Gopherslayer

*carrying a stool from the school cafeteria*

I'm gonna go out and sit, you wanna join?

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:31

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Fredrik1 posted:

*carrying a stool from the school cafeteria*

I'm gonna go out and sit, you wanna join?

WOAH the lunch lady keeps a stool? At school?!

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:36

Finger Prince

I'm a social sitter. I don't buy my own chairs.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:40

Goons Are Gifts

Lying on a couch in a way that your rear end is not even really on it anymore, but your upper body still enjoys the soft fluffiness of a couch. It's something between lying and sitting and it's so relaxed and comfortable that it's impossible to post from it

# ? Mar 28, 2019 17:44

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Goons Are Great posted:

Lying on a couch in a way that your rear end is not even really on it anymore, but your upper body still enjoys the soft fluffiness of a couch. It's something between lying and sitting and it's so relaxed and comfortable that it's impossible to post from it

I think it's called slouching, find out why this dangerous new comfort may be happening closer than you think, at 11. Then stay tuned for...

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:21

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Standing up until everyone's finished eating because I was raised right

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:24

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Lifeguard pointing at the "No Butts on the Beach" sign as I comp a squat. Don't you have a life to guard or something?

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:25

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Me after reading a "Do Not Sit" sign sponsored by the American Lung Association: Stay in your lane, bro!

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:27

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

the nerve of some people just saw a guy sitting in his car while driving!!! he couldn't apply enough pressure to the gas to go more than 8mph and almost caused 12 accidents! c'mon, we all do it, but do that at home

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:31

redm

sitting on the hood of my car filling up at the gas station as an attendant rushes outside waving their arms at me

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:35

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

redm posted:

sitting on the hood of my car filling up at the gas station as an attendant rushes outside waving their arms at me

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:38

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

my pregnant wife, sitting on a bench outside the mall. all the old ladies walking by are shooting dirty looks at her

# ? Mar 28, 2019 18:44

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

redm posted:

sitting on the hood of my car filling up at the gas station as an attendant rushes outside waving their arms at me

canyoneer posted:

my pregnant wife, sitting on a bench outside the mall. all the old ladies walking by are shooting dirty looks at her

# ? Mar 28, 2019 20:22

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

a couple finishes up their steamy session and retires to the two rocking chairs in the corner of the room, as is the custom

# ? Mar 28, 2019 20:23

Finger Prince

I used to hate going out when they still allowed sitting in bars, but now that they make everyone sit outside, it's so much more enjoyable.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 20:28

google THIS

"Wow, it's standing room only in here."

"I know, the state passed a new law last year."

# ? Mar 28, 2019 20:41

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

Passengers rushing for the benches on the platform as soon as the long distance train pulls in to a designated sit stop.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 20:45

google THIS

cigarette load --> whoopie cushion

# ? Mar 28, 2019 20:49

Historical Wizards

Remember kids, sitting does not make you cool. Those models in the chair adds aren't even really sitting.

Many thanks Social Vegan for the wonderful av, and Fanky Malloons for the sig

# ? Mar 28, 2019 21:02

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

I'll have you know I bought an Aeron and it is the most comfortable sit you will ever sit the simple things in life

I don't care if I die of hunch back, everyone gets hunch back! Big cane is just trying to push canes on us and say how terrible sitting is for posture. My Dad got bunch back at 30! and he never sat a day in his life!

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Mar 28, 2019 21:12

Finger Prince

Used to be you just sat in a chair, and sure maybe you got hemorrhoids eventually, but it was cool. Now kids these days have all these fruity chaise lounges and figure they can just lounge around anywhere on them. Like, we get it, you recline. Well enjoy it while it lasts, because they're going to ban that too next.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 21:12

kalel

eyeing the sitters outside the house party with jealousy while quietly popping a chairtix

# ? Mar 28, 2019 21:25

Papa Was A Video Toaster

I loving love squatting. So much better and healthier than sitting. I actually never picked up sitting, just went straight to squatting.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 23:13

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# ? May 6, 2024 21:13

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

TVsVeryOwn posted:

I loving love squatting. So much better and healthier than sitting. I actually never picked up sitting, just went straight to squatting.

Its just not the same. You should really try it for the full experience some time.

# ? Mar 28, 2019 23:20

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