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Anybody else delving into shovelware Christmas movies for the season?
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Dec 6, 2019 00:40
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| # ¿ May 17, 2024 17:28 |
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Tubitv.com has a strong showing, and it's free. Highlights from my watching so far have included Christmas Trade (2015, a father/son body-swap with William Baldwin as the dad), Christmas Tail (2014 romcom with dog drama), and Monster & Me/Santa & Me, which is about a mean girl getting turned into a monster by Santa, to teach her a lesson. Becoming a monster entails having a unibrow, four facial boils, messy hair, and blackened teeth.
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Dec 6, 2019 00:56
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The sequels are kind of amazing for how loose they get with the plots.
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Dec 6, 2019 19:24
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Special shout-out to Santa's Boot Camp (2016), a film in which Santa's elves go on strike to protest poor working conditions, Santa kidnaps a handful of children from Atlanta to serve as forced labor, a decorated military officer elf is used as enforcement when the kids engage in peaceful non-compliance, and surveillance culture and magical discipline are used to break the children's spirits until they voluntarily aid in the kidnapping of their own friends to serve as further forced labor. It's also repeatedly noted that Santa's elves didn't have vision and dental coverage in their insurance until last year's protest.
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Dec 15, 2019 02:16
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I still can't forgive Tekken 2 for squandering the surprisingly decent quality* of the first Tekken film. *by videogame adaptation standards
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Apr 24, 2020 15:34
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Just finished watching Deadly Attraction on Tubi, and woof, that was terrible. I started it this morning, broke off after twenty minutes or so, and finished it after work. Garbage-rear end Lifetime-wannabe exploitation film about a guy who's a real rear end in a top hat. Antagonizes his family, gets in 'winner moves out' fistfights with his dad, does deals with a dwarf loan shark, has the hots for his mom (and sets her up to get raped when she's like 'What the gently caress is wrong with you?'), and hangs around a nearly undecorated apartment set trading stories with his dipshit friends. The movie also uses date rape for jokes. And after all this edge-attempting bullshit, it pulls a Jesus redemption for the main rear end in a top hat. And then the final scene is his mom accidentally shooting the infant son of the Christian woman he's linked up with, and the kid blankly looking around as people do terrible acting jobs around his fake-blood-spattered body. It's been a long time since I saw a bad movie in which I couldn't pick out any redeeming features, but aside from some decent camera-work, I've got nothing for this one. e: Oh, and the opening credits are in Papyrus font. Darthemed has a new favorite as of 05:56 on Aug 18, 2020 |
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Aug 18, 2020 05:52
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| # ¿ May 17, 2024 17:28 |
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Yeah, the shades Arnold wore in the first Terminator were Gargoyles.
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Sep 19, 2020 19:13
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