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Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Our main event for the evening is John Cena vs. R-Truth in a tables match. Punk comes out in the main event, costs Cena the match and then retreats to the top of the stage, where he sits down cross-legged. Cena and Punk wrestle in a "Hollywood" battle royal with an audience comprised of WWE performers and others dressed as Hollywood stars, including Johnny Knoxville, Sean Michaels, and Jim Belushi.

Cena is the first wrestler to be eliminated, and he returns to the ring. He delivers a vicious knee to Punk's jaw, and Punk collapses. Cena then gets the win in the match.

Later that night, Cena and Punk walk to their hotel room. Punk tells the cameraman, "I'm ready for the match," and runs into the locker room, saying that he's going to fight Cena.

Cena takes off his shirt, exposing three muscles in his torso.

"Hey, man - what the hell? No way he could kill me that easy! I know I can out-strength you and out-think you, but you have to be out-maneuver me," Punk said

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Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

In March, Bryan started acting verbally abusive towards AJ but she stood by him.At WrestleMania XXVIII on April 1, after sharing a "good luck kiss" with Bryan, he was surprised by Sheamus and defeated in 18 seconds. On June 2, AJ was left for dead after she received stitches for a broken nose and was left in a coma. She died the next day. On June 3, after she was released for her injuries, Bryan had a "good-bye kiss" with her at his locker room. Bryan then began crying in front of her locker and made several remarks at her grave. His girlfriend, AJ, continued to be in denial but on the last month of June, she became open about the truth because they were in the same hospital room. As Bryan was leaving for the ring, he asked about AJ, but AJ said she didn't know how to stop the pain of the stitches.

"We're just on top of each other, and this is the last time of the year where we're trying to be the best team for each other."

"It was a shocker to me, to know that we were having surgery at the same hospital


He screamed at Austin and asked whether he wanted to help him, to which Austin responded with a yes. Kane stated that the only way they can feel his pain is by experiencing it themselves.

Kane poured gasoline on Ross and set him on fire as a helpless Austin watched from the ring.
As Ross screamed for help, Kane threw his own head into the ring.

Ross escaped and then collapsed onto the the the ring mat; after he regained consciousness, Kane went into him and burned the rest of his body. As he lay dying, Kane stated that he wanted to die, and stated that he "loved God" then and claimed that he was going to have his way with him.

After his defeat and the killing, Kane stated that he had lost forever (as he wasn't even allowed to die by the laws of God) and that he had been the first to take their powers. Kane went on to reveal that he used their powers to manipulate everyone into committing murder and other criminal acts for their own amusement, as shown on the back of the corpse of Austin's killer and a picture of him in the

Codependent Poster fucked around with this message at 04:39 on Sep 28, 2019

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Eddie Guerrero, Chris Benoit, Perry Saturn and Dean Malenko appeared in the front row of Raw.

As WWE Champion AJ Styles took the stage, the crowd chanted "Who the hell is AJ!"

"The Chosen One" was dressed in his full "Royal Rumble" outfit, complete with a purple mask and crimson mask. Underneath his mask he wore two large purple boots.

The crowd chanted "Who's next?" when AJ Styles took the stage. In another tweet, Styles wrote of his entrance, "Everyone is so psyched. The chants keep coming."

The crowd chanted when @Macho_Man_13 came out. @WWEDanielBryan is ready!! pic.twitter.com/wg6fCiSz5E — AJ Styles (@AJStyles) January 9, 2017

The rest of the evening was spent as WWE Champion Roman Reigns entered the ring with Bray Wyatt backstage. As Bray Wyatt was being escorted off, Wyatt told Styles, who was on the way to his match, to go "with me."

AJ Styles is here!! #RoyalRumbleProving to

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Paul Heyman, and I am the Advocate for the reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Heavyweight Champion Brock Lesnar, or at least he will be when he comes back from the Dead. His opponent this time will be former Ultimate X Heavyweight Champion Ric Flair from WCW, but with the help from the mighty Mr. R, the world's greatest super-structure, the WWE will also feature a former WWE Heavyweight Champion in the upcoming main event.

Now that's a great story. But it is much more interesting to me to find all of the reasons that make the WWE Universe's opinion of these two men so strong. Here is a list of my top 10 reasons that I feel make up a reason why Lesnar's chances of defending the WWE Championship are so strong:

1- Brock Lesnar is an expert at what he does.

To put it simply, Brock Lesnar is the absolute worst at what he does. When people were telling the story of how Brock Lesnar "broke" RVD, I

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

"I do not have a 10-inch penis," Hogan said, referring to an interview he did in character. "Terry Bollea's penis is not 10 inches."

"I was totally Hulk Hogan
!" Hogan continued. "I never had to shave my pubic hair off, and I have a beard. People were trying to get me pregnant and I just said I would not be pregnant… It is not Hulk Hogan! It's not the Hulk Hogan show. It's just Hogan."

Hogan is far from being an impotent one-night wonder (even when we're talking about sex). The wrestler is a sexpert who boasts a massive arsenal of erections and a reputation as a sex addict. Back when he was in action, he would boast to guests that he doesn't mind his penis becoming erect for longer than 50 minutes. "I don't miss, like, a centimeter," Hogan said during an interview in 1998.

Hogan hasn't always had a stellar reputation, though he's come a long way from his WCW days. In recent years, he has been openly gay, had his name removed from a lawsuit

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

The Dudley Boys stole Christian & Chris Jericho's bags when they were a tag team and they were left to walk around with towels. With Christian complaining about shrinkage (down there, of course), the Dudleys opened up their bags to reveal a jar of rear end Cream. When they opened the rear end Cream, it did nothing more than soak all the mud from their clothes. The Dudley Boyz then opened the bag and found some extra rear end Cream, and a pair of socks. The Dudley Boyz then opened the suitcase and found a new sweater. They put the sweater on and continued walking.
Christians headband.
The Undertaker, Kane, and JBL came by to watch the Dudley Boyz.
The Dudley Boy's got his new sweater. They then said they liked the rear end Cream.
JBL asks why you're wearing sweater, to which Undertaker responds, "Because it's warm."
They went through different scenarios, and ended with Undertaker holding the sweater up and saying that the sweater was the only thing keeping him warm that summer.

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Huh, the Greater Power storyline is different from what I remember...

During the Raw Is War held on June 7th, 1999, Vince McMahon revealed himself as the "Greater Power" which had been controlling a group of wrestlers against "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. During the reveal, McMahon yells "It's me, Austin!" and says "The Greater Power has arrived!" He was then shown holding an enormous weapon with two big blades. This was also the name of a mysterious entity that was revealed during a segment of the show; he told Austin that it was "The Demon."

The Powers, led by "Stone Cold's" "greatest power," are then shown battling a large army of demonic opponents. During a battle around a circular arena, they appear to be holding a big steel sword, which is wielded in a way resembling a hammer.

The main body of the Powers begins to turn into a dark, demonic appearance when Vince says "The Power is gone..." and then the entire group turns into a large tentacle monster, then a tentacle monster moves in the foreground and a red circle, like the symbol of their group, and the

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Vince McMahon: I'm not gonna let Ric Flair kill what I created... I'm going to inject the WWF with a lethal dose of poison. If anybody's going to kill my creation, I'm gonna do it. Me! And the NWO. And the COSA! I'm gonna put the NWO and the COSA in the WWE, all in one place. I'm gonna kill all three of them, and then I'm gonna do it to the rest of the WWF.

WWF IC Champion Rick Rude : You're so loving delusional! Can I ask something that's been on my mind all day? Can I ask you one question? Have you lost anything? Just give me one answer to that... (Rude pauses a moment, then shakes his head) I'm loving serious. You're just an idiot.

WWF Tag Team Champions Greg Valentine & Brutus Beefcake : There it is, Mr. McMahon. (to the crowd) There it is!

WWF Intercontinental Champion Randy Orton: You're so fuckin

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

The "This Is Your Life" epic involving Mick Foley, The Rock and a colourful cast of characters said to be from Rock's past remains one of the most beloved skits in WWE history. Foley's natural charm and The Rock's razor-sharp wit helped the film to become a huge hit.

The film is based on the book in which Foley describes becoming a part of the WWF with the idea that he was "wasting his years training for a career in a sports entertainment business". As with all the legends that featured in the film, Foley was also inspired by the life of an alcoholic who got his start in the WWF.

The film's success is largely credited to Foley's charisma and charisma in his role as King Kong Bundy in the film, which led to him receiving an Academy Award nomination with Rock's best supporting actress award.
Foley said: "It's not my first career, and it's not my first time acting as a part of a movie," "This Is Your Life" is in cinemas now.

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Michael Nakazawa came out to interview Riho in Japanese until Nyla Rose attacked Riho and power bombed Nakazawa (before almost dropping him). Kenny Omega came out to make the save for Riho. Kenny gave her one of the best promos of the weekend (after which he was booed again) and she went out with a headbutt. She took the crowd to another level by dancing on them again. She then proceeded to get into a heated face off/bowtie/fistfight with Hideo Itami (the new face of Omega), who then proceeded to take an arrow to the face, and then kicked her out of the ring. She went back in and said to Itami (who was still with the belt) that she wasn't there to wrestle and That's how she's going to be remembered. After Itami walked away to her (to get her backstage) she walked up the ramp and took off her clothes and came right back in with a shot in her cheek. That made Itami really mad, so he threw a chair at her (in a match with Kevin Owens), but he didn't get it. Itami

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

After Brock Lesnar defeated Kofi Kingston in 8 seconds to win the WWE Championship, Rey Mysterio appeared on the ramp accompanied by two men. Rey walked up and said to one of the men, "We need to have a talk." The two men started shouting at Rey to not look like that again while the other one held up a gun, "Brock Lesnar," as he pointed it at Rey. "That's right. It's good to be the man, isn't it?" In response Brock then walked down to the ramp, grabbed the gun by the barrel and shot it at Rey. The gun went off and Rey fell to the ground. After Rey fell Bray Wyatt walked up to the ramp and said "I know you need to let Rey know you're coming for him." The two men started arguing while Bray pointed the gun at Bray.
Bray Wyatt walks up to the ring and says "There's no need to hide. Come in this door, it'll be easy."

Or

After Brock Lesnar defeated Kofi Kingston in 8 seconds to win the WWE Championship, Rey Mysterio appeared on the ramp accompanied by a large, very fat, and very strange man. He was wearing a hat covered in tiny black spots and with a large, pointed black beard. I don't know if it was the mask or the hat that gave me a fright, but I didn't want to look at my watch. I was in shock that the first thing that I saw while walking around Rey was "I am NOT A MASK!" That being said, the masked man also looked familiar, which means he's either a member of the Undertaker's Death Squad or Mysterio is one of his henchmen. And I don't just mean henchman. That guy had an incredible mustache that covered one side of his face, which I'd bet is from the beard and the large hat. Then he got up and, without even looking in my face, started walking up the ramp toward the ring... which of course, no one could see due to the dark. After

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

THE FIEND hit Sister Abigail as the crowd chanted,"AEW!". THE FIEND put Seth in the Mandible Claw and the screeching music played to close out the PPV in exactly the same way as the last few weeks of Raw, with Bray's laughter. The crowd booed furiously !!!

Next, we see Bray Wyatt being chased by a man wearing a "The Undertaker" t-shirt. Bray comes out and the crowd cheers and chants, "You think The Undertaker is scary? It was you that put my head in a bag when I was 8!" Then we see that Bray's head has been replaced with a giant skull.

Then the audience sees Bray hit Sasha as the crowd shouts,"Shout out to the B-side of the show that brought The Young Bucks back into the company!" The crowd then shouts out "Get out, The Undertaker!" then "Bray Wyatt"!

All of Bray Wyatt's body parts get decapitated, then the crowd chants "Taker, Taker, Taker!" (That's me, the voice. What do you think, did

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

You say your name is Finlay and you love to fight. I say your name is Finlay and I love to hate. Finlay, this fight. This fight! Fight! Let me out of this, get the gently caress out of here. I love you. You're all I've got. This is not my fight. Yours is not mine."


Hunter Hearst Helmsley is also known as: The Connecticut Blueblood, HHH, Triple H, The Game, The Cerebral Assassin, The Asskicker, The Destroyer, The Creator,
The Iceman (the other spelling being a very silly error), The Godfather, The Big Bossman, The Ultimate Warrior, The Rock, John Cena, John Tenta, Hulk Hogan, Jake "The Snake" Roberts, The Undertaker, The Undertaker (also known as "The Tombstone"), The Undertaker's Pitbull, The Undertaker's Zombie Son, The Undertaker's Zombie Dogs, Tonya Harding, The Undertaker's Son, The Undertaker's Zombie Princess, The Undertaker's Zombie Princess

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Friday Night SmackDown – Oct. 11
Raw Women’s Champion Becky Lynch
Roman Reigns
The O.C. (United States Champion AJ Styles, Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson)
"The Fiend" Bray Wyatt
Drew McIntyre
Randy Orton
Sasha Banks
Ricochet
Braun Strowman
Bobby Lashley
Alexa Bliss & Nikki Cross
Lacey Evans
The Viking Raiders (Erik & Ivar)
SmackDown Tag Team Champions The Revival (Scott Dawson & Dash Wilder)
Natalya
Heavy Machinery (Tucker & Otis)
The Street Profits (Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins)


"The Real American" Booker T
John Cena (United States Champion)
Randy Orton (United States Champion)
Sascha McEntire (United States Champion)
Samoa Joe & Jimmy Uso (United States Champion)
Nikki Bella
The New Day (Nia Jax, Bayley & Bayley's Mother)

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

I can't deal with WWE's dogshit product anymore. I've held out as long as I can because I figured it was important to provide some kind of weekly guide on the biggest pro-wrestling company in the world but this is just becoming a giant drain on my time. If I keep writing these they're just going to get more and more negative and biased so I'm done. WWE is the greatest loving company in the world but I can no longer stand being a part of it. And you can all be the judge of that if you are interested!
And lastly, I can't take my poo poo seriously anymore when I'm told by certain people who have no loving clue what the gently caress they're talking poo poo about. Seriously, what the gently caress are they talking about? "Oh, you like wrestling, it's a cool, popular thing." That's a joke because there is no loving way I, as a fan of wrestling, would like it as much as you do. It's the closest thing to a hobby as you can have in this country so

The Firefly Funhouse finally aired and Bray declared YOWIE WOWIE! about Seth, who he thinks is strong and brave and smart... but THE FIEND never forgets. Ramblin' Rabbit appeared frightened but Bray told him he would be okay because "he" keeps us safe. Seth appeared out of nowhere and beat up Bray, then tore up the set while Ramblin' Rabbit screamed out in a panic. Bray rose up and tearfully asked Seth why he was doing this, and Seth literally set fire to the set and "burned it down" while shots of THE FIEND's face appeared on the screen. Seth then screamed at Ramblin' Rabbit, revealing that his goal was "to prove that THE WAND was the greatest thing ever created by God, and that he would one day burn in HELL for the sin of not knowing it." YOWIE WOWIE!! So that's when this happened...

The Firefly Funhouse finally aired and Bray declared YOWIE WOWIE! about Seth, who he thinks is strong and brave and smart... but THE FIEND never forgets. Ramblin' Rabbit appeared frightened but Bray told him he would be okay because "he" keeps us safe. Seth appeared out of nowhere and beat up Bray, then tore up the set while Ramblin' Rabbit screamed out in a panic. Bray rose up and tearfully asked Seth why he was doing this, and Seth literally set fire to everything around him, including some pretty old furniture and a television. YOWIE WOWIE!

When Ramblin' Rabbit returned to the Funhouse, he tried to tell Seth who is the real boss, but he did not listen, so he smashed Seth's head into the wall so hard it shattered and cut off his hands, which were trapped in the skull. (He has since put the broken hands up on the wall like something else, but they do say that "if you break something that doesn't belong to you, you are welcome.") In a bid to save his own

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

Are you ready?

You think you can tell us what to do?
You think you can tell us what to wear?
You think that you're better?
Well, you'd better get ready
Bow to the masters
BREAK IT DOWN!


(sounds of breaking down and scraping as everyone starts shouting)

BREAKING IT DOWN! BREAKING IT DOWN! BREAKING IT DOWN!

It's a time for action, it's a time for revolution

It's a time for action, it's a time for revolution

It's a time for revolution

We've got our work cut out for us

We've got to smash the oppressions and start over

(break it down, smash it down, break it down)

BREAKING DOWN! BREAKING DOWN! BREAKING DOWN! BREAKING DOWN!

Well, we've got all of these words to remember

I've already said 'enough' but now it's time for action

We're living in an era of revolution, we're

quote:

It's time to play the game...
TIME TO PLAY THE GAME!!
Ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha

Its all about the game, and how you play it
All about control, and if you can take it

Or you can't
The game of life, the game of death is played
Just to stay alive, just to stay alive
Its only time to play the game
If its the beginning, or the end, its the game


Time to play the game

Time to play the game

Time to play the game the game

Time to play the game the game

Time to play the game time the game

Time to play the game time the game

Time to play the game time the game

Time to play the game time the game

Time to play the game

Who you gonna call?

The Game Of Life or The Game of Death

Time to play the game

Time to play the game time the game time the game

Time to play the game the game

Time to play the game the game

Time to play the game the game

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

I think I'm cute
I got gold medals
I've got the moves
That makes 'em all tap out
The Angle Slam
The Ankle Lock
Marty Jannetty
Still can't walk

I'm just a sexy Kurt
(sexy Kurt)
I'll make your ankle hurt
(ankle hurt)
I'm just a sexy Kurt
(sexy Kurt)
I'll make your ankle hurt
(ankle hurt)
(sexy Kurt), (sexy Kurt)
All these boys can be in bed with me

When they're naked I can have sex with you

I'll make you feel like a big girl

I'll make all your holes hurt

I'll make your legs hurt

I'll make your rear end hurt

I've got the moves

The Angle Slam

The Ankle Lock

Now, how does a girl like a man like me?

I've got the moves

Let's see what I can do to a woman like you.

[...]

When I go through with a woman,

It was when all that sex

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

Rey Mysterio asked the kids to chant "mamabicho" at Baron Corbin. Mamabicho means "cock sucker". Cory looked like a cock sucker to no one and it worked, as the crowd roared with delight and the announcer called the match "Champion vs. Cock-Sucker". The champ was Corbin, who took the title from Mysterio because Mysterio was in the "cock-stain" stage and Corbin was in the "fucker-stain" stage. "The Cock-Sucker" was the word people were saying on T.V. to everyone, including Mysterio.
The match went on as planned and Corbin beat the poo poo out of Mysterio with his "Mamabicho" maneuver. When Corbin was done, he made one more "cock sucker" motion. The fans booed and screamed. That's all you need to know about this match. It had everything you needed to be happy. In some ways, it was similar to

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

Jake "The Snake" Roberts: You don't want to play cards with me. I cheat. I cheat. You want to play 21? I got 22. You want to play blackjack? I got two of those too. You want to play aces and eights? I got too many of those too. I have a few piles of card and dice too. You want to play cards and make money? I got it in me. You want to play poker? You got the same. You want to play games, or to be part of a good bunch of people, you gotta buy me some of those too. A good group of people, you can play one of those, and I'll pay it to you, and I'm gonna pay it to the game you're playing. You want to play games, but you don't want to get a cut of the action? I don't care. If that guy pays, I'm buying the game, and if the game's a poo poo game, I'm going to buy the loving game from that guy. If they don't want them, I'll just buy it. I pay for

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Hopkins FBI posted:

Hulk Hogan: I mean, I’d rather if she was going to gently caress some n---er, I’d rather have her marry an 8-foot-tall man or a black woman. It seems that way, it seems that way.

A.J. Styles: I was talking to Hulk and he said,

Hulk Hogan: I would like you to loving kill yourself.

A.J. Styles: I can handle that.

Hulk Hogan: I didn't mean it that way. I meant it. But yeah, it's a different world now.

A.J. Styles: It is. All of a sudden, I don't have to think about my dick and think about how much I have. It's okay now. I mean, it still feels that way, but it's a different world in there.

WWE.com: Hulk and his son are very active on social media; on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram. How much do you think it's influenced your social media presence in general this year?

A.J.

This one is incredible

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

After Fightful Select got in touch with Seth Rollins today about the WWE Raw talent meeting, several other members of the WWE Raw roster have spoken to us about the meeting.

All confirmed the nature of the talent meeting, but shot down the initial reports that Randy Orton made a light hearted joke in order to soften the mood. According to one talent " No one said anything dumb. Opposite actually. Weird meeting but no one acted up."

The Dave Meltzer report of AJ Styles and Rusev speaking up when questions were fielded was accurate.
It also appears that John Cena will likely go after CM Punk's leg. According to a report from the talent "Randy Orton called CM Punk's leg a piece of poo poo."

Some fans are saying that the meeting is the best they've ever seen.

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

After winning the King of the Ring tournament, Stone Cold Steve Austin cut a fiery promo which contained the famous "Austin 3:16 says the c*** doesn't work" line.

The "Austin 3:16 says the c*** doesn't work" line became the rallying cry for Stone Cold Steve Austin fans around the world and, in turn, Stone Cold Steve Austin himself. Austin has since parodied the line in numerous interviews and, in 2006, Austin was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame with the line in his speech, saying he wanted his "c***" to work.

8. John Cena is also known for his infamous catchphrase.

If there is one word that defines John Cena, it's the catchphrase "c***." It's a well-known quote from John Cena in which he says that "c***" is a word he uses in his promos.

Triple H took the mic and finished the D-Generation X promo by saying "And if you're not down with that, we got two words for ya: F*** off, and f*** off, and f*** off" and "You wanna get in the ring, you wanna get in the ring, we got two words for you: F**k off, and f**k off".

The crowd gave Triple H a standing ovation before going back to their seats, with a number of them turning to Triple H and giving him an incredible bear hug as he stood with his microphone in his hand, a huge smile on his face, and the crowd in full force. Triple H then continued on to say "You got me with your promos today," then the crowd cheered as he said "You got me with your promos today," Triple H said that he's the best in the world and he's been doing this since 1996, and

Codependent Poster fucked around with this message at 19:29 on Nov 17, 2019

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Daniel Bryan started arguing with the puppets from the Firefly Funhouse. He kept saying "No!" while they kept saying "Yes!" But when he said "No!" to the one saying "Yes!" Bryan got so worked up that he pulled out a sword and started swinging at it. The puppet had a sword made by the same man who created the weapon the Joker uses to hold up a man with his head in the middle of a crowd of people. (This was the second time he had done a similar sword stunt, but was only able to do it when he had his hands tied.) It was the first time the sword had come into contact with a puppet, which made the puppet very nervous. Bryan's swordsmanship had never been that good, but then again, he had never fought a real person. But he was no match for the sword.

So Bryan decided he would never fight again. Instead of fighting,


Daniel Bryan started arguing with the puppets from the Firefly Funhouse. He kept saying "No!" while they kept saying "Yes!"
until the other puppets left. When he said "No," they went to the door, but then Bryan ran back to the room where the puppets were, shouting "No! No! No! No!" This angered the puppets and they left. When Bryan said "No" one last time, they entered the room and Bryan threw the "Firefly" logo at them, then it burst into flames. Bryan was seen on the set of his new show, Talking Smack with Jim Ross on the set of SmackDown Live, and asked the cameraman to put his finger in his eye (which he later removed).

In the backstage segment of The Great American Bash, Bryan was told by the rest of the SmackDown roster to act natural during a match with the Authority

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

Triple H was wearing Kane's mask and having sex with a mannequin. When he was finished, Triple H said "This is why I don't talk about my dick anymore." This was then followed by a shot of Kane's face with his hair in a knot with a mannequin underneath. Then Triple H said "He was a man, so of course he'd want to get a piece of it" and cut the mask off of Kane's head. Triple H then said "I'm not done with this, but I won't lie, I was a little turned on watching Kane get his revenge on me." Then Kane cut a shot of his cock. Triple H came back into the ring and said "You like my cock, don't you? I bet you do. I bet you like getting hosed by a man, don't you? You like getting your rear end hosed by a man, don

quote:

Rob Van Dam's new theme song goes:

ROB VAN DAM
THE WHOLE FUCKIN SHOW


YOU'VE GOT A BUNCH OF NONSENSE,

AND I'M GOING TO FUCKIN ROCK THE gently caress OUT!

ROB VAN DAM

THAT BITCH BETTY

WANTS TO FUCKIN BAN YOU,

AND HER BLOG IS FUCKIN' DISGUSTIN'

ROB VAN DAM

YOU WON'T FIND MY SPOT, YOU BITCH.

YOU'VE GOT NO CHANCE

BEHIND MY BACK

ROB VAN DAM

IT WAS AN OPEN-AND-CLOSED MOMENT!

ROB VAN DAM

YOU'LL FUCKIN SUCKIN' BITCH'S DICK!

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

The following team will represent NXT during Survivor Series:

Keith Lee
Triple H


Bray Wyatt

Curtis Axel

Erick Rowan

Dolph Ziggler

John Cena

Vince McMahon

Chyna

AJ Lee

Bray Wyatt

Big E Langston

Neville

Cesaro

Chris Jericho

The Miz

Isaac Yankem Dolph Ziggler

Chris Jericho

Trish Stratus

Jay Briscoe

Kane

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

The Big Boss Man invited Al Snow over to dinner. After Al Snow started to take a few bites, The Boss Man revealed that the dish was made up of iced watermelon and yellow pepper. After Al Snow confirmed this, The Boss Man said he had a few things to tell him. Al Snow was scared and hurriedly left the kitchen. The Boss Man then came out of his house and told him that he had a target on his back and that one day he would kill him. Al Snow requested the Boss Man to spare him and spared him, but The Boss Man drew his

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

The Undisputed Era all turned to see who would be making their entrance as the fourth member of Ciampa's team. Then the music hit, and out came former WWE Raw member Jey Uso, brand new and already voted to be on the Showcase of the Immortals.

Jey got to do what every other wrestler on the roster dreads most – say "Rude Boy" Ryback's catchphrase, "you are not a friend of mine!"

But then things got even more interesting than that.

quote:

The Undisputed Era all turned to see who would be making their entrance as the fourth member of Ciampa's team. Then the music hit, and out came former WWE Raw member Enzo Amore in full Kimora Lee skins to a simple dance routine.

Styling it out from there, Will Ospreay and Ken Anderson made the entrance. After introducing themselves and saying they'd be signing autographs later, they hit the ring and unleashed an impromptu (if not quite as loud as some other entrances) rendition of !O!La!La!La

quote:

The Undisputed Era all turned to see who would be making their entrance as the fourth member of Ciampa's team. Then the music hit, and out came former WWE Raw member AJ Styles, who had won a highly controversial Tables Match in the main event of this year's WrestleMania 33.

After striking a pose for the camera, Styles came out with a huge smile, took in the atmosphere, and then it was time for him to unleash his new catchphrase.

"Woooooo! I just wiggled my rear end."

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Didn't Cena drink some mamajuana juice on a PPV during a backstage skit because he was worried he wouldn't have the stamina to have sex with Eva Marie?

I don't believe it. Eva Marie isn't going to have sexual intercourse with Cena, she is going to sit on his face like a huge horn dog.

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Oh wow. You know where this is going, don't you?

"Eva Marie is going to sit on his face like a huge horn dog"

"Would you like some mamajuana

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

A member from the audience said they wanted to join Brandi Rhodes and Awesome Kong's Nightmare Coalition. They entered the ring and then Brandi and Kong iced them with a Batista/D-Generation X heel turn. At this time, The Legion of Doom (Jax, Jason, Lita, and Perry Saturn) were causing a bit of a stir on the broadcast booth. They were members of the Covenant of Doom. They ran through the 2-minute match and Beast Boy and Stu revealed the true identity of the Menace. They beat them down and they were finally joined

quote:

A member from the audience said they wanted to join Brandi Rhodes and Awesome Kong's Nightmare Coalition. They entered the ring and then Brandi and Kong began to chant "Hold them, Baby! Hold them, Baby!" which the crowd did as they hit the rope for a buttslam. Awesome Kong and Little Kong were then attacked and the two officials were then taken out of the ring, and immediately afterwards Brandi and Kong attacked them.

After Awesome Kong and Little Kong performed the Facelift by using the American flag as a tool, they attacked Bo Dallas and made him jump onto

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Asuka came to the ring to confront Becky Lynch. Becky Lynch then opened up the briefcase to show Asuka a $3 million check, a promissory note for 3 WrestleMania title belts, and a handwritten note from her father. However, not only did Asuka not take the money, but she also denied her father an interview and as she left the ring, they had a confrontation where Asuka accused her father of embezzling money from various businesses and would never work for her again.

The heels eventually got the upper hand on Kenny Omega until Damascus (the new Matt Hardy) emerged from the ice. He hit Chris Jericho with a golf cart.

Then he hit Sammy with a golf cart.

Then he hit Eric Young with a golf cart.

Then he hit Daniel Bryan with a golf cart.

Then he hit Mark Henry with a golf cart.

Then he hit Luke Harper with a golf cart.

Then he hit Samoa Joe with a golf cart.

Then he hit AJ Styles with a golf cart.

Then he hit William Regal with a golf cart.

So yeah, pretty cool.

Codependent Poster fucked around with this message at 16:45 on May 12, 2020

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

HHH is also known as
The Cerebral Assassin
The Game
The King of Kings
The rear end-Kicker
The Creator
The Destroyer

The Assassin
The All-Wise
The Fool
The rear end-Killer
The Soul-Killer
The Dream-Killer
The Blade
The Child Killer
The House of the Scorpion
The Master
The Seven-Dead
The Infernal Beauty
The Maker
The Avenger
The King of Death
The Cannibal
The Assassin
The Sorcerer
The Destroyer
The Maker
The Dark Lord
The One-Way Trap
The Undying Monster
The Doctor (GOTY Edition)
The Master of Death
The White Queen

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Sami Zayn was stripped of the belt for the crime of masturbating with it backstage in an attempt to find inspiration, according to Mojo Rawley of WWE.

After being sent to the back by WWE, Zayn insisted that the "perfect" belt never existed, so that meant nothing to Zayn, who performed "a phenomenal evil dance" before the match and stood over it saying, "that was the only way you'd feel good with the belt." When WWE officials objected to his ruse, Zayn ended up facing John Cena.

Later, he stripped the belt from the cage on his second to last opponent, Daniel Bryan, though not before Bryan planted the belt on him for good measure.

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

Ric Flair gave Christian a low blow, which allowed Randy Orton to punt him in the head. Afterwards Orton got in Christian's face and yelled "THAT SHOULD BE YOUR VOTE" and "CHRISTIAN!" at Christian.

As Christian got up Christian said "I still got 2 more singles matches to win back the IC belt," and when people laughed in response to this, Christian said "If that's the punishment for being a good guy, I'm taking it."

SmackDown is going on a 30-year hiatus now that the Attitude Era is over, and after having long matches with Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns, and others, Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins will have the chance to

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

Cameron Grimes saw a silhouette of a woman behind the curtain in the shower. "Is there room for Cameron Grimes?" he asked while taking off his hat and vest. When Cameron Grimes pulled the shower curtain back, he saw a strange image - a man holding a pair of scissors. Cameron Grimes is a man from Maine and wanted to share what he saw. "At first I didn't know what it was," he said.

"I thought maybe it was an old man.

But then I realized he was holding something.

He was holding a pair of scissors. "Grimes continued to stare at the figure.

He then asked if he could use the phone.

The phone line was disconnected, so Grimes called his roommate and he also saw the figure. "He said he had the same

quote:

In the haunted house, Cameron Grimes saw a silhouette of a woman behind the curtain in the shower. "Is there room for Cameron Grimes?" he asked while taking off his hat and vest. When Cameron Grimes pulled the shower curtain back and saw no one, he decided it wasn't all that scary after all.

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

quote:

Before walking down the entrance ramp, Johnny Gargano took out a knife and cut open his thumb, just like he said on NXT TakeOver. Gargano also took the attention off him by using a piece of the metal fencing that was on the entrance ramp. Gargano worked it over for a bit and did a chair shot to the hand. Gargano then poured out a bottle of bourbon on the open wound and put some more on the chair before climbing down and walking away.

Gargano’s appearance on the show was set up by his conversation with Charly Caruso after he won his first NXT Title. After refusing to answer if

quote:

Before walking down the entrance ramp, Johnny Gargano took out a knife and drew the symbol of a lightning bolt on his own hand, then pushed it on the ground. It symbolized the final element of his change into his new persona as Tommaso Ciampa, which Gargano uses to get into a match.

With that, Gargano officially debuted as Tommaso Ciampa for the first time in 2017.

Here's a clip of the entrance:

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Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

I decided to see what ChatGPT could come up with. This is on a prompt of Paul Heyman confronts Brandi Rhodes, but she gets haunted and it scares Paul Heyman away

quote:

[The camera fades in, showing Brandi Rhodes walking through an empty backstage area when suddenly, she hears footsteps approaching from behind. She turns around to see Paul Heyman walking towards her with an angry expression on his face.]

Paul Heyman: "Brandi, we need to talk. Your husband Cody has been causing a lot of trouble lately, and I don't appreciate it."

Brandi Rhodes: "I don't know what you're talking about, Paul. Cody has been focused on his own business."

Paul Heyman: "Don't play dumb with me, Brandi. I know he's been talking smack about my clients, and I won't stand for it."

[As Paul Heyman moves closer, the lights flicker and a chilling breeze fills the air. Suddenly, a ghostly figure appears behind Brandi, causing Paul to jump back in fear.]

Brandi Rhodes: "What's wrong, Paul? Are you scared?"

Paul Heyman: "What the hell was that?!"

Brandi Rhodes: "Oh, that's just the ghost that haunts this area. It doesn't like it when people are aggressive or mean."

[The ghostly figure moves closer to Paul, causing him to back away quickly.]

Paul Heyman: "I don't believe in ghosts! This is ridiculous!"

Brandi Rhodes: "Maybe not, but I think it's trying to tell you something."

[The ghostly figure suddenly vanishes, leaving Paul Heyman standing alone and trembling.]

Paul Heyman: "I don't want any trouble. I'll leave you and Cody alone from now on."

Brandi Rhodes: "Good. I suggest you keep it that way."

[Brandi turns and walks away, leaving Paul Heyman looking shaken and confused.]

Paul Heyman: "I don't know what just happened, but I'm never coming back to this part of the arena again."

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