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With only two months of 2019 left the critics of the world are already hard at work drafting their best-of lists, preparing the memorialize the cultural output of the decade that began with Old Spice making Tim & Eric wackiness mainstream and Insane Clown Posse rapping about magnets and ended with concentration camps and paper straws. The 3d boom went bust, physical media was replaced with Funko POPs on store shelves as digital distribution took over, and the annual predictions that this was going to be the year that the blockbuster bubble burst and the superhero fad died out were incorrect each and every time. The American public at large became more savvy about how films are made while at the same time having their brains destroyed by YouTuber film criticism and inane fan theories. And in spite of it all, some good movies were made. However, that is not what this thread is for. This thread is for looking back at and discussing the WORST movies of the 2010s. A few highlights to kick things off: Alice in Wonderland (2010)  In many ways a harbinger of some of the worst failings of the next decade of movies to come: a live-action Disney remake, an awful post-conversion into 3d, aggressive courtship of fandoms and merchandising, and a lead actor who has been Cancelled. Making over a billion dollars worldwide entirely due to being the first big 3D movie to come out after Avatar, a cast of talented actors and a director who usually at least has an eye for visuals all come together to make a movie that is shockingly forgettable and boring. WORST MOMENT: Being rewarded for sitting through the movie by watching Johnny Depp's head pasted onto an America's Got Talent breakdancer. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwzAOV7uxw0 Jack & Jill (2011)  2010's Grown-Ups might better embody Adam Sandler's completely failure to capitalize on the goodwill of Funny People and instead descend into movies that existed largely as an excuse for him and his friends and their families to go on vacations on the studio's dime while drawing a fat paycheck, but while plenty of kids growing up at the time at least connected with Grown-Ups as a dumb fun family comedy Jack & Jill was loved by nobody and didn't even make back it's budget domestically. WORST MOMENT: The film's climax being a literal Dunkin Donuts commercial. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azxV-Y_pGh0 Act of Valor (2012)  A movie starring actual Navy SEALs that started its life as a promotional ad for the US military, this piece of literal propaganda was an unexceptional action movie that was forgotten by everyone who saw it a week later yet will always remain a black mark on the history of American cinema as a whole. Laid the groundwork for the kind of culture war bullshit that would later make movies like American Sniper huge box office successes. WORST MOMENT: Knowing that there is a nonzero chance that this was a successful recruitment tool. Movie 43 (2013)  Putting out a sketch comedy movie in the era of YouTube is hard enough, doing it with a bunch of terrible sketches that inexplicably feature a ton of big-name performers makes it even more baffling. WORST MOMENT: Thinking about how long Hugh Jackman had to sit in the makeup chair having a pair of lovingly-crafted prosthetic balls attached to his face.  Winter's Tale (2014)  An adaptation of a magical realism romance novel that is a whirlwind of failed and stalled careers all doing much worse than you would expect from them. WORST MOMENT: Will Smith as the devil, wearing a Jimi Hendrix t-shirt in the 1910s and sporting a pair of bad CGI chompers.  Mortdecai (2015)  To this day I'm not sure anyone has actually seen Mortdecai. Critics have written about it being a comedy heist movie that forgets to be funny or have action and stakes but to the world at large it is only that movie responsible for a three month period where everywhere you went there was Johnny Depp with a funny mustache, inviting you to see the funny mustache movie along with his costars that are also wearing funny mustaches. WORST MOMENT: The film's entire ad campaign, whose social media is still preserved in amber for all to marvel at. https://twitter.com/mortdecaiindia/status/557787237266366464 Suicide Squad (2016)  The 2010s were full of failed attempts to ride the coattails of The Avengers and build cinematic universers, and while DC's attempts weren't without merit or their fans it's hard to argue that there wasn't a bigger and more public fiasco than Suicide Squad. The movie may have launched a million Harley Quinn halloween costumes and Gang Weed memes but at its core the film, much like The Joker, is irreparably damaged. WORST MOMENT:  The Book of Henry (2017)  When the trailer for Book of Henry dropped some people thought it was a joke. The idea of a movie about a genius savant child using Rube Goldberg machines to convince his mom to assassinate a child molester from beyond the grave seemed so ludicrous and tone deaf, and the supporting cast was full of SNL alum and stand-ups. But alas, Book of Henry was not only real but it single-handedly sent Colin Trevorrow's career path crashing back down to earth as he was removed from working on the next Star Wars movie. WORST MOMENT: The sinking feeling in your stomach halfway through the trailer when it makes its turn. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nd60i3ZnLOE Gotti (2018)  Both weirdly sympathetic towards its subject matter and bafflingly incompetent in its production, Gotti embodied so much of the poo poo of the modern day as it was widely seen thanks to a now-defunct app that wasted millions of dollars in venture capital and was promoted with the Trumpian argument that since critics hated it you should see it to stick it to the establishment. WORST MOMENT: The closing title card arguing that the government are the real bad guys because the witness protection program means criminals get away with their crimes instead of going to jail. Hellboy (2019) This year has seen so many failed attempts at rebooting a franchise (does anybody even remember MIB: International or Shaft?) but Hellboy was easily the worst simply due to how incomplete a film it was thanks to behind the scenes drama squandering a bunch of otherwise talented people. WORST MOMENT: The awkwardly ADR'd f-bombs so they could brag about it being an R-rated movie.
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Oct 22, 2019 21:47
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TrixRabbi posted:6. Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015) Please don't do this. A Marvel or a Star War are not the worst movies of the decade and even if you genuinely think they are those two topics have been so well-trodden there's nothing funny, informative, or interesting to be wrung from them. quote:5. Kung Fury (2015) Kung Fury didn't invent that neon laser grid 80s monkey cheese maximalist garbage but it definitely popularized it in a way that we're still feeling today.
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Oct 22, 2019 22:48
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Basebf555 posted:I struggle to think of a film from the past ten years that was worse than The Snowman. It's missing some of the most basic pieces that you need to form a real narrative, like, at a base level it's not a coherent story. And it has no redeeming qualities that could come close to balancing that out. Fassbender is a complete nothing in it, just a non-entity. Yeah, I thought people were joking when they said that it was unfinished but the director himself admitted that they just didn't get to shoot everything they needed and he had to just try and edit it together as best he could. I feel like one of the things that marked this decade was America embracing and then slowly failing the bleak Scandinavian thriller subgenre, in addition to the Dragon Tattoo movie series fizzling out and high-profile TV adaptations like The Killing and The Bridge winding up disappointing the Jim Carrey vehicle Dark Crimes winding up on a lot of Worst Of lists last year. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WWC0GTP08w CelticPredator posted:A Nightmare on Elm Street is the worst movie of the 2010’s I don't know if it's even the worst horror remake of the 2010s. I feel like the 2016 remake of Blair Witch was uniquely terrible because when Platinum Dunes remakes Elm St or Fox tosses a remake of Poltergeist to some studio guy who only does YA movies you at least have reasonably lowered expectations, Adam Wingard coming hot on the heels of You're Next and The Guest with a found footage movie that revealed at the very last minute it was a Blair Witch movie felt like it could have been something special and instead it's just a worse version of a classic movie. DC Murderverse posted:The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure - I'm aware that i am not the target audience for this movie and almost excuse it for that but it's sub PBS-quality with an inexplicable cast and really uncomfortable character designs and writing. I watched this for a podcast. Nathan Rabin's writeup points out that Oogieloves was created by the guy who got rich marketing and merchandising british childrens shows like Shining Time Station and Teletubbies in the US but didn't actually have anything to do with their creation and production, which explains its complete inability to connect with its target audience despite the money and connections that must have gone into making it.
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Oct 23, 2019 19:14
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Mute was such a wet fart of a movie after almost a decade of buildup, it's insane that Duncan Jones entered this decade a promising up and comer and wound up making a blockbuster that made almost half a billion dollars and his blank check weird Russian sci-fi movie and both of them were disappointing and forgettable.
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Oct 25, 2019 00:20
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Uncle Boogeyman posted:soliciting worst movies of the decade lists and getting pissed when someone puts a Marvel movie on theirs is a perfect way to close out the decade when you think about it TrixRabbi posted:lol exactly. Have you considered making posts that are funny, informative, or interesting instead of being the weird kid on the school bus telling everyone Justin Bieber is the worst musician in history and then calling everyone gay when they tell you to stop being annoying. Arcsquad12 posted:The Ridiculous Six is somehow the worst thing Adam Sandler has ever created in a timeline where Jack and Jill exists. Between that and A Million Ways to Die in the West this was the decade where comedy westerns brought successful comedy filmmakers to their nadir.
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Oct 25, 2019 18:50
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Hodgepodge posted:also lol at putting suicide squad on your list (which was far from perfect but undisputably hugely successful) and then wringing your hands at someone daring to criticize a marvel movie because screaming hordes of fanboys consider marvel movies platonically good and violently refuse to think about them even for the sake of more than superficial praise let alone critically Assuming that anyone telling you that your weird years-long obsession with hating a thing isn't interesting or funny or relevant to the topic at hand means that they secretly love/are the thing that you're making fun of is one of the worst and most longstanding goon faux pas out there. Being in the same company as the dudes who chortle at dead bodies on Mt Everest and can't believe how much RAM the Xbox has and really hate fat people and Indians is not the side of history you want to be on and I recommend you kindly gently caress off and fix whatever soul sickness you have before returning. 
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Oct 26, 2019 19:16
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OpenSourceBurger posted:A special mention for that Tyler Perry film that ends with a woman who cheater on her husband getting AIDS and it's treated as a moment of karmic justice. White paternalism is amazing, people try and cancel writers like Quentin Tarantino for writing characters that are obviously bad people saying and doing bad things but Tyler Perry does this or the movie about how the problem with juvenile delinquents is that their parents don't beat them enough and they all nod because it's just how Those People are. Inspector 34 posted:Lot of people talking poo poo about about Pacific Rim itt, and one person said our only point of reference for big rear end robots was this or that something, but I feel like you goddamn nerds have forgotten that Power Rangers was a thing and involved multiple pilots controlling a big rear end robot that smashed monsters. Maybe we didn't all watch anime or read mangas or whatever but we do still probably have some frame of reference for robots vs monsters and, for me at least, Pacific Rim kicks rear end. Pacific Rim was a movie about giant robot fights that has almost no giant robot fights. You get 30 seconds of two Giants wading in waist-deep water during a raging storm, an hour of boring training montages and adults acting like bitchy high school students, then another fight in a storm where all the robots but one are knocked out before it begins and then a.l finale on the bottom of the ocean in the middle of a dust cloud. It utterly failed at what it set out to do and is boring as poo poo. axelblaze posted:Charlie Day is also pretty good in it The sequel rules because, in addition to having more and more interesting fight scenes and having a cast of young people that are far more fitting to the dumb training academy melodrama the series is invested in, has Charlie Day chewing scenery as the alien-possessed villain.
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Nov 10, 2019 03:14
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Jesus christ you're still bitching about Star Wars and Marvel movies.
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Dec 31, 2019 20:36
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Well the 2010s are over, may this decade finally be the one where you free yourself from whatever bizarre compulsion makes you consume dozens of hours of popular media you actively dislike and then spend hundreds of hours bitching about it online. See y'all in another ten years, hopefully you'll actually be able to talk about more than two things then.
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Jan 1, 2020 23:39
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