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i just straight up exist in the midwestern united states
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Nov 6, 2019 15:43
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| # ? May 5, 2024 17:15 |
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Autistic Edgy Guy posted:i just straight up exist in the midwestern united states gently caress close the thread guys we can't beat this one
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Nov 6, 2019 15:51
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I vote republican.
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Nov 6, 2019 15:58
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I believe in climate change, human rights, healthcare and everything but I vote republican because most of all I believe I deserve to pay less taxes on my grotesque wealth
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Nov 6, 2019 16:09
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Heh heh, these guys are gonna love my quips during this movie! *fucks around on phone, instantly becoming a lighthouse in the darkness of the theater* HEY THESE CREDITS ARE AS LONG AS MOBY DICK! HEY-OH! *loudly eats a Subway sandwich that makes the entire theater smell like garlic and cheese* HAHA LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE IN A REAL STICKY SITUATION! *spills entire gallon of soda on the floor, decides that "the help" will clean it up later*
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Nov 6, 2019 16:22
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Gosh it’s windy today, and the corral is at least 20 feet away. I, a perfectly healthy and abled person, should leave this shopping cart right here in the middle of the parking lot.
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Nov 6, 2019 16:24
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The only punctuation I use is ellipses.....
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Nov 6, 2019 16:25
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*Loudly talks on the phone via one of those new dorky Bluetooth headsets in a crowded public transit vehicle*
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Nov 6, 2019 16:29
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Mixes my regular size shopping cart with the smaller sized ones.
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Nov 6, 2019 16:40
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Hi, I'm a pharmaceutical company executive.
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Nov 6, 2019 16:40
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It's me! But evil and with a little goatee.
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Nov 6, 2019 16:42
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Hi I'm an outspoken white male feminist
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Nov 6, 2019 16:45
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Amazon product question: Does this run off of usb power? Answer: I don't know, haven't tried.
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Nov 6, 2019 16:46
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I rob graves to make my rent
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Nov 6, 2019 16:50
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Albert Fish was born May 19th in New York City in 1870. He was known as 'The Gray Man' and 'The Werewolf of Wisteria'. He was a serial killer who slayed children and ate them. When police asked a woman to describe him she said he was "gray in both appearance and demeanour". The child rapist and cannibal Fish boasted that he had children in every state. He only chose victims who were either mentally handicapped or African American. Fish tortured, mutilated and murdered the youngsters with a meat cleaver, a butcher's knife and a small handsaw, solidifying his reputation as the most vicious child slayer in criminal history. Though barely literate, Fish wrote taunting letters to the parents of his victims gruesomely detailing how he slayed, butchered, cooked and then with great enjoyment dined on their offspring. He would inevitably declare that a child's roasted rump was the most toothsome dish in all gastronomy. Additionally, Fish was a masochist and would insert wool doused with lighter fluid into his own anus and set it alight for his own enjoyment. Fish was finally arrested and he immediately began confessing to killing 700 children. He was dizzyingly happy, smiling as he described the grisly details of the tortures and the murders appearing to the detectives 'as the devil himself'... I mean this guy was a real jerk!
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Nov 6, 2019 16:51
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Pickwick High posted:I rob graves to make my rent Wrong thread?
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Nov 6, 2019 16:55
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hello
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Nov 6, 2019 16:56
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*Finishes screwing in my blue light bulb on the porch, which I will proudly light every night* Hey babe, is my Blue Lives Matter bumper sticker here yet?
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Nov 6, 2019 16:57
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*insists father buy me one of the golden geese at the factory*
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Nov 6, 2019 16:59
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*chews bubble gum or watches TV*
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Nov 6, 2019 16:59
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A Fancy Hat posted:*Finishes screwing in my blue light bulb on the porch, which I will proudly light every night* Oh poo poo is this a fash thing? I do it just to stop my kids doing heroin on the porch
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Nov 6, 2019 17:02
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*goes on a foreign vacation every year, greatly contributing to global climate change and turning wholesome places into soulless tourist traps*
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Nov 6, 2019 17:02
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I vote Democrat and inexplicably still think I'm superior to... The Others.
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Nov 6, 2019 17:04
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Pickwick High posted:I rob graves to make my rent What does some dead guy need with a wedding ring? He's having sex with angels now.
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Nov 6, 2019 17:07
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I'm not driving, officer, I'm travelling. Now, am I being detained?
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Nov 6, 2019 17:14
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Hi, I'm unaware that my child's iPad has a volume button
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Nov 6, 2019 17:21
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A Fancy Hat posted:*Finishes screwing in my blue light bulb on the porch, which I will proudly light every night* This is actually for Autism Awareness, unless they’ve appropriated that too.
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Nov 6, 2019 17:27
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:This is actually for Autism Awareness, unless they’ve appropriated that too. Search your heart
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Nov 6, 2019 17:29
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Hey, check out my Marvel snapback.
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Nov 6, 2019 17:29
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Hi there sport! I am your Uncle who retired early but now I am trying to get back into the workforce because I blew through all my retirement money in a year. I did not need to use a computer before I retired, but now I have too! I have been taking the same computer class for two years and I still don't know how to look at files on a USB. I know you are busy with your Job, but I will try and call you at the most inconvenience times because I know you're not really working. How can you be working when all you do is sit around and type stuff on your computer. Get a real Job.
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Nov 6, 2019 17:45
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I yap about politics in every thread But in real life I don't do jack poo poo except vote every couple years
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Nov 6, 2019 17:54
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Grevling posted:The only punctuation I use is ellipses..... Always with the wrong number of full stops.. of course....
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Nov 6, 2019 17:57
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*produces and airs several television commercials about injuries my navy seal team caused to an unarmed disabled man years ago which are postured as a source of national pride*
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Nov 6, 2019 18:00
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*eats meat and drives a gas-powered car* *has a kid because i think the world needs more of me*
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Nov 6, 2019 18:06
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*shuts all the lights off on Halloween* It's a SATANIC holiday and I'll be GOD DAMNED if I let these kids learn about the socialist trick or treat bullshit. If they want my candy they can buy if from me, like you're supposed to!
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Nov 6, 2019 18:11
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I post on the comments feeds of clickbait like this !! With the worst, dumbest boomer poo poo you've ever heard using inappropriate capitalisation and punctuation marks ?? And then after starting sentences with the word And I then finish making you want to die by writing just my opinion at the end of them like it means something . Just My Opinion !!
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Nov 6, 2019 18:11
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"No listen, no list- NO. LISTEN, Karen, if you just watch this 14 hour video by QAnonBoi1488 you'll understa- NO! You'll understand why I shouldnt have to loving pay you alimony you stupid bitch! Christ!"
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Nov 6, 2019 18:13
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Colonel Cancer posted:*goes on a foreign vacation every year, greatly contributing to global climate change and turning wholesome places into soulless tourist traps* It's not worth it anyway. The food in Europe was so gross! The only thing I could stomach was McDonalds. DeathCrabForCutie fucked around with this message at 18:17 on Nov 6, 2019 |
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Nov 6, 2019 18:14
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Drunken Baker posted:Albert Fish was born May 19th in New York City in 1870. He was known as 'The Gray Man' and 'The Werewolf of Wisteria'. He was a serial killer who slayed children and ate them. When police asked a woman to describe him she said he was "gray in both appearance and demeanour". The child rapist and cannibal Fish boasted that he had children in every state. He only chose victims who were either mentally handicapped or African American. Fish tortured, mutilated and murdered the youngsters with a meat cleaver, a butcher's knife and a small handsaw, solidifying his reputation as the most vicious child slayer in criminal history. Though barely literate, Fish wrote taunting letters to the parents of his victims gruesomely detailing how he slayed, butchered, cooked and then with great enjoyment dined on their offspring. He would inevitably declare that a child's roasted rump was the most toothsome dish in all gastronomy. Additionally, Fish was a masochist and would insert wool doused with lighter fluid into his own anus and set it alight for his own enjoyment. Fish was finally arrested and he immediately began confessing to killing 700 children. He was dizzyingly happy, smiling as he described the grisly details of the tortures and the murders appearing to the detectives 'as the devil himself'... I mean this guy was a real jerk! The human brain can treat these impulses as perfectly normal and natural while also thinking it's ugly and gross for two adults of the same gender to have a loving, consensual relationship. Give everyon a lobotomy is what I'm saying.
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Nov 6, 2019 18:29
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| # ? May 5, 2024 17:15 |
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*Is standing patiently in line to order at a restaurant* *Plays on phone, glances around, does some small talk* *Thinks about what to do for upcoming holiday, sends text to friend, watches the public facing tv* *Finally reaches front of line* Oh, my order? Uh....
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Nov 6, 2019 19:59
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