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how am i supposed to have good posts with this low flow shower head
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Nov 27, 2019 19:27
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 12:53 |
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*slides into thread much like Kramer*
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Nov 27, 2019 19:28
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The deal! The deal!
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Nov 27, 2019 19:30
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these posts are makin me thirsty
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Nov 27, 2019 19:31
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Jerry's new girlfriend is a high school senior. George, Elaine, and Kramer are fictional characters.
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Nov 27, 2019 19:33
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 Jerroid! I have come up with an ingenious scheme! What is it this week Gnorge? An online magazine!I Oh brother.
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Nov 27, 2019 19:37
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You've never put poo poo in your posts? Don't knock it til you try it, Jerry
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Nov 27, 2019 19:37
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 Kramark what are you doing here? I'm the new manager of this department store of which you are an employee.*canned laughter*
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Nov 27, 2019 19:44
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I lost the contrast haha
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Nov 27, 2019 19:45
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No I won't take off my jacket.
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Nov 27, 2019 20:31
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Jerry it’s weird you have an underage girlfriend
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Nov 27, 2019 20:35
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Could I BE anymore Seinfeld???
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Nov 27, 2019 20:37
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noomin!!
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Nov 27, 2019 21:03
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*says the N word*
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Nov 27, 2019 21:04
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What's the deal with dating a seventeen year old?
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Nov 27, 2019 21:04
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He told me he was going to give me a 6er to knock me down a peg. Down a peg? I was already on my last peg! I have no pegs left, Jerry! No pegs!
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Nov 27, 2019 21:16
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*Peterman voice* "oh my....that avatar!"
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Nov 27, 2019 21:25
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He's a robo spine boy. A robo spine boy? Yes, a robo spine boy. What's a robo spine boy? He's got a robo spine. Boy!
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Nov 27, 2019 21:42
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*gets printer slapped out of his hands by two large, intimidating, yet very effeminate men* We're taking the printer and that's all there is to it. Oh-kay?
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Nov 27, 2019 21:57
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Oh yeah? Well, the Jerk Store called, and they had sex with your wife!!!
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Nov 28, 2019 05:37
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*Kramer shoots Jerry in the back of the skull the audience laughs as his brain matter cakes the lens and George screams in helpless terror as he knows he is next to be killed by Kramer who is also a virulent racist.* Kramer: You know why this is happening George. George: No please I dont know why Kramer why did you kill Jerry and his sweet, sweet munchable rear end in a top hat you BASTARD!? Kramer: Simple George, because he posted images of my feet online, images which I know he himself masturbated to and intended to disseminate online for others to masturbate to. George: Oh my god... Kramer: These images were sent to Jerry, in confidence, to hopefully gain his assistance in identifying a podiatry related issue, namely that... *He removes his socks and reveals his feet, they are normal feet, George thinks, but on closer inspection he sees the toes are now tiny penises, in fact, exact replicas of his very own tiny penis* George: Oh god oh god. How? WHY? Kramer: Why George? Because this is my curse, you would recall that I myself had received images you had forwarded to me of your very own penis, as a friend you requested that I peruse these images to help you with a phallic related issue, namely that... *Kramer tears of George's pants, hanging between his legs is a tiny penis, but upon closer inspection the tiny penis's urethral opening is not the usual expected slit, but rather a tiny anus.* George: My god that's... *George look's to Jerry's dead body* Kramer: Yes, you are beginning to see now. You are beginning to understand. *Kramer walks to Jerry's body and tears off his pants, George gasps* Kramer: Yes George, the rear end in a top hat upon your very own penis is JERRY'S. George: So that means your feet... Kramer: Yes George, I had masturbated and disseminated your penis pictures you had sent to me in confidence, just as Jerry disseminated my feet across the world wide web, behold! *He lifts up Jerry's luscious locks from what remains of his skull, there rests what at first glance appears to be normal ears, but are in fact exact replicas of...* Kramer: Yes, George, you see, they are my... George: Your feet... Kramer: Yes... you see now. George: Oh... my god... Kramer: And you see George, there lies his crime, my crime, YOUR crime, for the evidence reveals that Jerry had sent you images of HIS anus for you to peruse for reasons of anus related maladies, namely that... *They look to Jerry's bare bottom and his exposed anus, which appears as any other anus, but on closer inspection...* George: *Gasps with extreme terror* Kramer: YES GEORGE! It is our three faces, arranged like Mount Rushmore with an assembly of ANAL POLYPS that reveal the source of the curse, our unholy triad, our broken friendship of cruelty and evil! We damned ourselves to this fate you see? We are poo poo people, we do poo poo things to each other. It is our nature, and so God has chosen to destroy us utilizing the very mechanism we lack the most. Trust. That is why this happens because you George had done just as we. George: Yes, yes! My god yes god forgive me, I had masturbated to and disseminated online images of Jerry's anus for others to do the same! Oh god please forgive me and save my immortal soul. Kramer: Oh George, don't you know? We can ask the man for forgiveness our very selves in just a moment. George: *Sobs* *Kramer slides to George with his knees at an angle, he effortlessly blows George's head apart and then points the gun to his own skull as George's body flops to the ground* Kramer: Arrivederci New York! *A flash of light as his skull explodes, there is a brief silence as the lights dim, the audience is heard laughing in the background. The credits roll. Cue: The Seinfeld Theme* Lil Swamp Booger Baby fucked around with this message at 06:12 on Nov 28, 2019 |
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Nov 28, 2019 06:07
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Jesus Christ man
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Nov 28, 2019 06:16
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*Steals a Lobster from a commercial lobster trap*
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Nov 28, 2019 06:18
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Sid Vicious posted:Jesus Christ man Happy Thanksgiving Sid!!
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Nov 28, 2019 06:26
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Elaine's sponges weren't contraceptive. They were cotton balls, she used them to shoot heroin.
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Nov 28, 2019 06:29
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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:*Kramer shoots Jerry in the back of the skull the audience laughs as his brain matter cakes the lens and George screams in helpless terror as he knows he is next to be killed by Kramer who is also a virulent racist.* Badump bum buh buh, buuuhhh tickety wuh
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Nov 28, 2019 06:37
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 Looking at cleavage is like looking into the sun. You don’t stare at it. It’s too risky. You get a sense of it, then you look away.
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Nov 28, 2019 06:39
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Ornamental computer in the corner of the living room. Impeccably clean home due to no avenue of instant gratification via video games. Very anti-goon.
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Nov 28, 2019 06:41
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wide stance posted:Very anti-goon. It's pronounced "moops"
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Nov 28, 2019 06:44
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“miss” chanandler bong
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Nov 28, 2019 06:57
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"I'm supposed to make jokes?" *Looks into a mirror* "Oh, boy."
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Nov 28, 2019 07:04
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Seinfeld threads almost always produce funny poo poo
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Nov 28, 2019 07:05
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George definitely lived in Jerry’s apartment when he was out doing comedy on the road
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Nov 28, 2019 07:24
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RytMJ2-X-rw
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Nov 28, 2019 07:41
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I'm gonna rate this thread a 5, Jerry! A 5! It's gold, Jerry. GOLD! *puts on a suit made of soup*
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Nov 28, 2019 13:35
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WHAT’s the DEAL with age of consent laws!?
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Nov 28, 2019 13:52
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Jerry: so we get to making out and she starts with the dirty talk George: what did she say? Jerry: she says...I want you to eat my rear end George: eat her rear end? but you’re not an rear end eater Jerry: I know that! But what am I supposed to say? *kramer enters and starts looking through the fridge* George: Kramer, you ever eat rear end? Kramer: Definitely Jerry: Really? Kramer: of course! It’s 2019! what do you do? Regular oral? Jerry: well... Kramer: Oh, Jerry! Come on!
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Nov 28, 2019 13:56
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 Hello Jerroid. Hello Nimby. Why are you here?Oh didn't you hear, I'm the new HOA representative.YOU? You can barely deliver mail!*Armed Homeowners association troopers storm through the door and arrest Jerroid at gunpoint, Jerroid is handcuffed and a bag is put on his head* Nobody fucks with me! Ever!
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Nov 28, 2019 14:31
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you mean the posting gloves your mother laid out for you
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Nov 28, 2019 14:55
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 12:53 |
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Hello Newcombe. Hello Jarrett. Coffee? Sure. *24 minutes of quietly enjoying coffee as each pass sections of the paper between them, occasionally commenting about the weather or a particularly nice coupon. At one point Kratman bursts forth, however he just needs some batteries for his remote*
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Nov 28, 2019 15:00
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