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fair maiden, I am a suitor from the Orient. prithee, if thou wilt, i desire to gaze upon thine bobs |
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Dec 14, 2019 23:27
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| # ? May 3, 2024 12:47 |
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what have thee, brethren, to lose, but thy chains? the lairds care not for you, excepting your daughters and wives. they care not for your concern, despite it is only through thy travail and toil that the soil gives purchase to seed, that seed turns to life, and the bounty that thy have prepared is harvested. should not the whole of thy harvest feed thine? i have never lain mine eyes upon a king, yet he may take my life at a whim. my land, my family, my livelihood - all dependeth on the mercy of a man who's countenance i have never lain eyes upon. i know the lord god is good because of his good gifts, my strong son, my fat wife, my prize bull. beer, puppy dogs. truly this is a king who loves his people. what does the king give to you? taxation upon hardship. pick up your knife, your bow, your axe, and rise up with me. serfs of the world, unite!
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Dec 14, 2019 23:40
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please excuse mine own cries of pain for I have died and lost my brain the forest is burning, the creatures within may return to the light or continue to swim |
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Dec 15, 2019 01:27
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| Huzzah, Victory Is Thine! | |
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Dec 15, 2019 01:30
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Heather Papps posted:what have thee, brethren, to lose, but thy chains? the lairds care not for you, excepting your daughters and wives. they care not for your concern, despite it is only through thy travail and toil that the soil gives purchase to seed, that seed turns to life, and the bounty that thy have prepared is harvested. should not the whole of thy harvest feed thine? These wordes, I have wrote them out fair in my little booke of ideas, so that I might in some far off year make a goode storie wyth them as my friendes and allies explore donjons and do combat with wicked dragones. I do thank thee and honour thy craft.
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Dec 15, 2019 02:26
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harken all, for I have discovered this one wyrd trick to awaken the senses from the sleeping sickness. i fear that the healers disregard me for this discovery |
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Dec 15, 2019 02:58
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Thine priviest secrets hath been compromised by dowsers! Inquire within this soothsayers tent to divine how to counteract such malfeasance, all from thine own homestead!
Lux Anima fucked around with this message at 04:17 on Dec 15, 2019
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Dec 15, 2019 03:07
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when appointed thus in thine finery, do the masses not offer roses in praise? for a mere half-penny, you may lease a crowd of carriers on, to fawn as doves over the hem of your dress, the lace of your hat, and the sallowness of thy cheeks.
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Dec 15, 2019 03:10
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is thine lord and husband distracted by the haunches of the farmgirl? a wonderment of modern engineers and whaleboner scrimshawists, the false booty deception undergarment! the eyes of thy husband shall wander to and fro nevermore, for so affixed his gaze shall be upon thy bottom. prepare for childbirth, fair goodwives!
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Dec 15, 2019 03:13
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those art mine sabatons give them back thou art but a beast thine form is unsuitable for them
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Dec 15, 2019 03:44
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ChubbyChecker posted:those art mine sabatons all thine fortressess have been captured, knave!
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Dec 15, 2019 03:49
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fleshy victuals, in a gyrating motion? prithee, ampify upon this
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Dec 15, 2019 04:10
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father wants to marry me off to Thrunk Crunchfist, the barbarian brewer's son, but my heart yearns for Yerg Shittersmouth, the oafish hunchback my father employs to tend the stables. he drools and shrieks nightly but there is a poetry about him which intoxicates me.
crimes |
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Dec 15, 2019 04:21
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Prithee! From whence came the breaking of such wind? Tis not I, so comely and beguiling in my charms, clearly 'tis the dog, which sleeps with us and the rest of our family in our enormous fur-laiden bed
crimes |
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Dec 15, 2019 04:28
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Whosoever hath smelt it, verily hath dealt it. |
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Dec 15, 2019 04:31
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hangin out in a field, picking flowers, sunlight glinting in my flaxen hair, wearing just three hundred loving stone of undergarment
crimes |
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Dec 15, 2019 04:45
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me and Florence Welsh just running through a forest, makeup smeared but in a feral, glorious way. we stumble across a herd of wild giant chocolate bonbons, and pounce upon the weakest, our faces running with dark chocolate
crimes |
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Dec 15, 2019 04:46
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i took counsel today from an astrologer. the astrologer fears i may be afflicted by ligmine *snicker* |
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Dec 15, 2019 05:56
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nut posted:alas but i am a young maiden, curious and headstrong |
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Dec 15, 2019 05:57
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On proper occasion, this concoction, which yet granteth thee that eternal vigour of boyhood, commands a hefty and terrible price. And yet, such a potion can indeed be thine for all a pittance. Simply bequeath unto me six purses, each of one score and nine florins, plus four score and fifteen gold pennies; deliver these in sequent, each moon till the harvest, and everlasting youth is thine. But soft! Proceed apace, and ye shalt receive a largess: a leather scrip, with which to hold thine precious cargo. And! With three more such fees, nine in sum, claim yet another capsule of my forbidden draught—with accompanying scrip, kindly gratis. Mine trolley doth depart anon, and this bounty doth verily vade—invest yarely, or be content to wither! |
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Dec 15, 2019 07:54
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ChubbyChecker posted:those art mine sabatons |
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Dec 15, 2019 07:54
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I have something that might help, it is yours for nothing as I no longer prize possessions colours, my friends. all of the colours |
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Dec 15, 2019 08:02
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dost thou remember fondly the times had playing the game of Chesse? well, sir, i bear glad tidings. the original designer hast conceived of a game yet greater, with sixty-four hundred squares and a vast array of pieces, that thy whole village may play. i ask but a small donation that he might be able to continue his work developing it -- though, shouldst thou be a true fan of the Chesse, a greater donation would grant access to a greater "reward tier" and unlock the new Ultra Queen piece |
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Dec 15, 2019 09:46
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canyoneer posted:i took counsel today from an astrologer. the astrologer fears i may be afflicted by ligmine Prithee, I know not of the affliction ligmine. Wouldst thou deign to lessen mine ignorance concerning it? |
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Dec 15, 2019 12:55
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Whybird posted:dost thou remember fondly the times had playing the game of Chesse? well, sir, i bear glad tidings. the original designer hast conceived of a game yet greater, with sixty-four hundred squares and a vast array of pieces, that thy whole village may play. i ask but a small donation that he might be able to continue his work developing it -- though, shouldst thou be a true fan of the Chesse, a greater donation would grant access to a greater "reward tier" and unlock the new Ultra Queen piece lol GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:Prithee, I know not of the affliction ligmine. Wouldst thou deign to lessen mine ignorance concerning it? in this connection, canst thou also enlighten us as to the nature of bofa?
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Dec 15, 2019 14:25
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Whybird posted:dost thou remember fondly the times had playing the game of Chesse? well, sir, i bear glad tidings. the original designer hast conceived of a game yet greater, with sixty-four hundred squares and a vast array of pieces, that thy whole village may play. i ask but a small donation that he might be able to continue his work developing it -- though, shouldst thou be a true fan of the Chesse, a greater donation would grant access to a greater "reward tier" and unlock the new Ultra Queen piece hahah ---------------- |
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Dec 15, 2019 17:43
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*looking at a field of sheep* methinks it hath the wrong kind of ram.
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Dec 15, 2019 17:43
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cda posted:*looking at a field of sheep* methinks it hath the wrong kind of ram. ahahaha
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Dec 15, 2019 17:47
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a scullery maid just absolutely ripshit on pilfered cooking sherry, dusting the gently caress out of armor
crimes |
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Dec 15, 2019 20:16
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PHIZ KALIFA posted:a scullery maid just absolutely ripshit on pilfered cooking sherry, dusting the gently caress out of armor a group of hipster young maidens getting stoned out of their gourds on ergot-tainted rye and practicing old-timey crafts such as rubbing sticks together and laying one stone on top of another
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Dec 15, 2019 20:24
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Manifisto posted:a group of hipster young maidens getting stoned out of their gourds on ergot-tainted rye and practicing old-timey crafts such as rubbing sticks together and laying one stone on top of another Watch whether which witch wistfully whips wealing whelps with witchery, and win a leather coinpurse from Satan!
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Dec 15, 2019 21:49
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lol @ all the posts itt |
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Dec 15, 2019 23:17
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Whybird posted:dost thou remember fondly the times had playing the game of Chesse? well, sir, i bear glad tidings. the original designer hast conceived of a game yet greater, with sixty-four hundred squares and a vast array of pieces, that thy whole village may play. i ask but a small donation that he might be able to continue his work developing it -- though, shouldst thou be a true fan of the Chesse, a greater donation would grant access to a greater "reward tier" and unlock the new Ultra Queen piece Verily I say unto thee, that Sir Doubie, owner and proprietor of the Hounde Kennel of Doubie, doth be a clever and crafty man of trade, and that bequeathing a spare farthing to his most noble venture shall be a forthright boon to the burgeoning middle class, and that he has promised to name one of his delicious Houndes of Fire unto us, the Gunnes of That Which is Awfulle, and that it shall be called the Hounde of the Toad. |
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Dec 15, 2019 23:35
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me: so thou maintaineth that if I give unto thee this farthing, thou wilt return unto me a scrap containing a cipher of great complexity, and that my dominion o'er this scrap shall be recorded in an immense Tome; and if any take this scrap from me without just cause, the scrap will be useless to them, for the Tome shall demonstrate plainly that they are not the rightful owners thereof? merchant: verily me: mirabile dictu! and I may use this scrap in the stead of a farthing? merchant: it is so, for all those who will receive it me: and who pray tell will receive it? merchant: all and sundry, soon enough. even now, one may use it to acquire hot barley tea down the road; and should a villain steal thy other belongings, such a scrap may prove sufficient ransom for their return me: it seems that I should act quickly to acquire these scraps, for others shall surely covet them anon
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Dec 15, 2019 23:50
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The Clowner posted:Would it please thine ear to receive the history of my shattered visage? |
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Dec 16, 2019 00:54
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google THIS posted:Verily I say unto thee, that Sir Doubie, owner and proprietor of the Hounde Kennel of Doubie, doth be a clever and crafty man of trade, and that bequeathing a spare farthing to his most noble venture shall be a forthright boon to the burgeoning middle class, and that he has promised to name one of his delicious Houndes of Fire unto us, the Gunnes of That Which is Awfulle, and that it shall be called the Hounde of the Toad. Manifisto posted:me: so thou maintaineth that if I give unto thee this farthing, thou wilt return unto me a scrap containing a cipher of great complexity, and that my dominion o'er this scrap shall be recorded in an immense Tome; and if any take this scrap from me without just cause, the scrap will be useless to them, for the Tome shall demonstrate plainly that they are not the rightful owners thereof? laughin |
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Dec 16, 2019 00:59
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Art thou weary of slaving under the yoke of feudalism? Lord Ronald St. Paul has promised not to tax us, but neither to provide us our own homesteads and farmland, nor guards or fortifications against roving bandits. He promises that Ye Olde Hande of the Marketplace will nevertheless keep us safe and well provided. And though his estate is most grand and his own personal guard and vassals many, he hath promised that any of us who worketh hard shall become like unto him, and any dishonest among us shall lose their riches when their deceptions are discovered without need of laws to stop them. We should swear our fealty to him. |
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Dec 16, 2019 01:16
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google THIS posted:Art thou weary of slaving under the yoke of feudalism? Lord Ronald St. Paul has promised not to tax us, but neither to provide us our own homesteads and farmland, nor guards or fortifications against roving bandits. He promises that Ye Olde Hande of the Marketplace will nevertheless keep us safe and well provided. And though his estate is most grand and his own personal guard and vassals many, he hath promised that any of us who worketh hard shall become like unto him, and any dishonest among us shall lose their riches when their deceptions are discovered without need of laws to stop them. We should swear our fealty to him. friend, thy soul be mortally imperiled whenst thou consume any thynge under feudalism; whereas,
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Dec 16, 2019 01:29
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google THIS posted:Art thou weary of slaving under the yoke of feudalism? Lord Ronald St. Paul has promised not to tax us, but neither to provide us our own homesteads and farmland, nor guards or fortifications against roving bandits. He promises that Ye Olde Hande of the Marketplace will nevertheless keep us safe and well provided. And though his estate is most grand and his own personal guard and vassals many, he hath promised that any of us who worketh hard shall become like unto him, and any dishonest among us shall lose their riches when their deceptions are discovered without need of laws to stop them. We should swear our fealty to him. *frequently remindeth other learned men to seek more information posted to the door of the keep of Lord Ronald St. Paul* |
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Dec 16, 2019 01:32
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| # ? May 3, 2024 12:47 |
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*two peasants arguing furiously* thy ha'porth matters not a whit, and will not buy a kenning of grain, but that it is secured by the lustrous ingots of golden bullion the king hath ensconced within his vault. "but the king's bullion stocks are depleted! the duke of normandy doth press too heavily upon him francs for recompense with gold!" to assail the treasure standard is varletry! all else is fiat and witchcraft! |
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Dec 16, 2019 01:44
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