UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo

Who is your first pick in the deputy leadership race? This poll is closed.
R. Allin-Khan	6	1.60%
R. Burgon	80	21.33%
D. Butler	72	19.20%
A. Rayner	35	9.33%
I. Murray	5	1.33%
P. Flaps	177	47.20%
Total:	375 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

I knew things would be bad post-brexit, especially if we have to use up our food supplies for the coronavirocalypse but I didn't think we were at siege of Leningrad state yet:

Baked babies in Home Bargains.

The company that makes that is a few miles down the road from me. Can confirm that it is a real farm and also that is a real tower on the packaging

I don't like their mash though, too dry.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 21:14

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 02:39

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Guavanaut posted:

Between the original name and the Scottish Baronial Revival style that building radiates a powerful Calvinist aura. I can feel it disapproving of those clouds.

It has always struck me how the thing looks out of place in pleasant weather. It looks positively in its element set against grey, forboding skies. It also has a light on top for to... scare away the aeroplanes that gives it a definite eye of sauron vibe at night

# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 22:07

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Guavanaut posted:

ok boomer

Every time I see pictures from his campaign I hear the theme from Arrested Development :parrot:

# ¿ Mar 4, 2020 10:46

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

VideoGames posted:

I am becoming so numbed to this kind of stuff. Just profit over life every day, and no one really seems to care and no agency above them will do anything because tories are in power.
Good lord capitalism is the pits.

Ah yes but one day I might be the one reaping the profits! Then I will be glad all the little people like me are getting screwed! Surely only a matter of time before the tables turn :slick:

# ¿ Mar 6, 2020 11:05

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

Email should be compulsory these days or expect to be left out.
(Am about to become chair of the residents' committee for my flats and out of 19 flats I think just 2 of us have email so that is a gently caress ton of printing to do each time and the treasurer has already indicated that she isn't in favour of reimbursing printing costs).

Are you Seinfeld? :jerry:

# ¿ Mar 7, 2020 01:17

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Sanford posted:

Someone accused me of panic buying this morning because I was getting spaghetti and toilet paper. No mate I just want to eat some pasta and then clean my dirty anus, leave me alone.

I realise things are somewhat bleak on the politics front atm, but a local (Tory) parish councillor now apparently hates me so much his response to my recent letter was to shout �I�ve had enough of bloody [Sanford]!� and bang his fist on the table, inviting a reprimand from the clerk. It�s the little things.

You should clean your bum before you got out shopping imo

# ¿ Mar 7, 2020 12:29

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Guavanaut posted:

Fran�ais: le globe
Italiano: il globo
Deutsch: ein globus
Cymraeg: gl�b

Caustic soda should shift poo poo from traps. By turning it into poo poo soap, which is a nice thought.

Where is this from? I would possibly buy it from Belfast Brian Butterfield

# ¿ Mar 7, 2020 14:36

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Why is it that the British general public's response to almost any crisis is BUT MY HOLIDAAAAYS!!!!!!! :bahgawd:

# ¿ Mar 8, 2020 17:38

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

What do these people imagine humankind was doing for millennia before the advent of toilet roll? :laugh:

You can clean your arse better at home with a showerhead and a towel

# ¿ Mar 10, 2020 14:35

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

ShaneMacGowansTeeth posted:

I was advised to get some medium strength cocodamol when I had my last UTI and lordy I was high as a kite for the rest of the evening

I had to go to A&E on Sunday with a knackered (not sure how yet) spinal disc. I had morphine for the first time :freakout:

# ¿ Mar 10, 2020 14:48

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

If we get free food it will make us all lazy and stifle our entrepreneurialism.

# ¿ Mar 11, 2020 12:29

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

They touch each other about their respective persons out of wedlock, I heard :mad:

We are obviously witnessing The Lord's wrath for all the things I take issue with in this world.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2020 21:10

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Jippa posted:

https://twitter.com/privowen/status/1238916943802961920

The bloke's delivery of his first line had me ready to run for the bottom plat-form :laugh:

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 00:33

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

I think this is the ideal time to finally be rid of the handshake forever. What would you all like to see it replaced with? I personally quite fancy the sharp teutonic head bow :hai:

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 12:06

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

I also like the thing you see some 1990s Mancunians do where they sort of throw back their head to one side and look you up and down

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 12:25

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Drone_Fragger posted:

Hearing reports in London that the government is closing Thorpe park to turn it into a mass grave, scary stuff.

However in real news went shopping today around Birmingham and holy poo poo it’s like the apocalypse, security posted at the end of the toilet roll and soap aisles confiscating peoples stuff if they are taking too much, police being called due to an argument about how much milk you can take resulting in an irate man taking a swing at a security guard. Absolutely mental.

Was it fresh milk? :laugh:

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 15:30

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

April fools day is going to be too easy this year, isn't it?

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 17:29

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

bornbytheriver posted:

I have a question: do I understand correctly that the Taiwanese authorities fitted infrared thermometers at busy rail stations and as passengers made their way across the central part of the stations they were being monitored for temperatures and those with temperatures over 37.5 were stopped from entering the station? Is this being done anywhere in the UK?

I've been to hospital twice in the last couple of weeks and nobody there was even asking any questions :laugh:

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 17:30

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

sinky posted:

Here's a picture of our pandemic response today:

I'm the white bloke

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 17:38

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Red Oktober posted:

The governments response is loving infuriating. I guess this is what happens you you elect a single issue government! Fucks sake.

There is no way they will have planned for a scenario where something of this scale comes along at the same time. Probably explains why we're seeing nothing by way of a response

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 17:44

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Angrymog posted:

The bathroom had something that wasn't a bath or a shower, rather a sort of tiny, deep, corner-tub.

Mate I thought we'd discussed bidets to death at this point

# ¿ Mar 15, 2020 18:48

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Shyrka posted:

I haven't left the flat since a late night run to the 24 hour Tesco last Tuesday. Got to say the Brexit stockpile really did pay off.

Just had a couple of tinned peaches in some rice pudding and it took me right back to my childhood. Is this the Blitz spirit Boomers keep talking about?

edit: my cat also getting in the Blitz spirit by hiding in a tactical bunker.

Adorable. Is that one of them things on your bookshelf what has all different bits of the brain labelled on it?

# ¿ Mar 16, 2020 11:20

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

hemale in pain posted:

I know you guys aren't dumb but seriously don't order deliveroo or uber or whatever. Most of my fellow workers are unhygenic as gently caress and tons of the riders believe the pandemic isn't real or is just flu.

I'm paranoid as gently caress about this and i still have to touch my face/peoples hands regularly. there's no other way to pass food over or take your helmet off.

There's zero chance that a driver on a 10 hour shift will have washed their hands or disinfected their gloves.

I am pretty sure those food delivery services were running a lot more TV ads than usual over the weekend when I had the TV on.

Or maybe it was one of those things where you just notice something a lot more when you become aware of it. I actually thought for a bit like, this is not how I imagined the future. I imagined ordinary people would be able to do a lot more with the technology available to them in 2020 than ordering takeaways and taking pictures of themselves on the toilet but here we are.

crispix fucked around with this message at 12:28 on Mar 16, 2020

# ¿ Mar 16, 2020 12:23

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Isn't it touching all the stuff in and around a toilet that spreads germs? So would it not be less unhygienic to pee outside so long as you have a reasonably clean knob?

# ¿ Mar 16, 2020 12:32

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Borrovan posted:

Very mildly symptomatic over here so I'm isolating, just had an online all staff meeting via webcam so got to play a fun game of "guess-who's-wearing-trousers" (spoiler: not me!). We're also ending all teaching effective immediately, before the University mandated Friday cut-off. Getting real over here.

Just spoke to my Gran though my Granddad's got "a cold", & she's been out loving line dancing this morning Figures that the Government hasn't told them to isolate yet so she's gonna make the best of her freedom whilst she can. They are literally doing exactly what the Government they voted for says and it is going to get them killed. gently caress.

Tell her if she doesn't cut it out you're having everyone dress up in wild west outfits and playing Shania Twain at her funeral :mad:

# ¿ Mar 16, 2020 17:19

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Is the five week wait still in force for new Universal Credit claims? :/

Surely going to be record numbers signing on shortly

# ¿ Mar 16, 2020 22:15

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Jose posted:

No it requires breaking the toilet seat and I haven't bought a new one yet

can you not just have a go on it in the garden or something? We're really curious :/

# ¿ Mar 16, 2020 23:25

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

BLAHDDY 'OSE POIPE BAN though isn't it :bahgawd:

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 02:16

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Sanford posted:

So we're all working from home tomorrow. Wooh! But check this loving gem from our FD:

Wrote it down on the spot because I couldn't quite believe it. To be fair our CEO did call him out and say he does care about people, a lot. Nevertheless.

I hope he dies a painful death, op.

And and and you're there and you look right at him, right at him, right? And he's all gaspin and beggin for oxygen and you just shrug and walk off lol >: D

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 12:58

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Time to get the old poit�n operation going in the shedlet imo :banjo:

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 14:08

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Darth Walrus posted:

* sad trombone noises *

https://twitter.com/peston/status/1239910681886982144?s=21

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQOPc8HdEZI

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 15:05

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

You want slimer off ghostbusters on your emergency planning committee at a time like this imo

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 15:29

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

He looks boozey af and did not sign up for anything like this amount of work.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 16:22

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

This my sort of excellent kind of Rory Bremner sort of way biting political satire type of comedy type thing for yous all:

to enjoy

AHEM

More like Rishi POOnack!!!!!!!!!

:newlol:

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 01:08

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Why do people go to gyms anyway. House weights are good. You can lift them in your pants and watch TV in comfort. No people to judge you and no mirrors anywhere so you don't have to see your own disgusting, straining face

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 01:54

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

He's about as svelte as a manatee and he looks right there like he's just passed hard gas

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 02:17

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

FiftySeven posted:

I run a small video game shop and honestly I am absolutely terrified. There is so many unanswered questions and taking on more debt is just absolutely not an option in a market that is already extremely difficult to compete in considering the state of the nations finances.

What video games do you have? I might be interested, I like playing video games on my computer

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 02:24

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Oh. I had a very bad experience once in a second hand video game shop

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 02:34

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

Linehan has basically made defending his transphobic views his entire job and identity at this point. It's shocking how easily some people get carried away with themselves.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 14:11

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 02:39

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

I have a running joke with my ma about a tin of Tesco value chilli ( :barf:

) she has had in her cupboard since I was in my teens. I still check it's there sometimes when I'm at hers. I developed the joke in all manner of directions over the years, including that it's going to be revealed as my only inheritance in her will. It also was a real talking point during the horsemeat scandals. Just great mum banter, really. She was saying the other day that she might finally eat it, though. It went out of date in 2015

# ¿ Mar 18, 2020 14:16

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