|
NorgLyle posted:I watched the films before reading the books because I was "too old" in 1997 to be reading a children's book and so when Moody was in the movies I thought 'that was weird; they must have cut most of his stuff from the books cause he seems important and has like a character design'. Later, I read the books with my wife and discovered that, nope, he's not important there either and is just some guy who shows up to wander around in a few scenes before being killed (off screen). There’s a pretty solid bit in book 5 where he keeps catching Harry looking at him and it’s cause Harry is creeped out by the fact that he feels like he knows this dude super well when in fact he’s never actually met him. Then they don’t really have many more interactions and in book 7 when he dies Harry is still all “woe to us, for the stalwart defender who was always at our side is now gone!” and it’s like wtf are you talking about mate this guy has been around barely at all and never done anything remotely useful.
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2024 19:53
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 8, 2024 21:07 |
|
|
moody is harry potter's ric flair
|
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2024 20:15
|
|
|
Feldegast42 posted:Pretty sure nobody competent would be around even if Moody wasn't iced though The bar for competence is *extremely low* here. These are wizards, their average IQ is potato salad.
|
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2024 22:38
|
|
|
I forget, did they ever explain how Moody lost his eye? I like to imagine he's intentionally vague about the story and everyone thinks it's a wound he got in battle with a Dark Wizard that he doesn't want to talk about, but in reality he just tripped while holding a fork wrong or something similarly embarrassing.
|
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2024 23:50
|
|
|
Asterite34 posted:I forget, did they ever explain how Moody lost his eye? they don't. the only bit he explains is his nose which some rando death eater took a chunk out of
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 00:35
|
|
|
Asterite34 posted:I forget, did they ever explain how Moody lost his eye? Wizard poop disappearing accident.
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 00:38
|
|
|
Teleported into traffic.
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 02:00
|
|
|
tragic wand cleaning accident
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 02:56
|
|
|
Plucked out his own eye because it caused him to sin and he took the teachings of his lord and savior Jesus Christ very seriously. Then got a new eye that could look at people naked because the good book didn't mention anything about transhuman prosthetics.
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 03:00
|
|
|
That's just the eye he was born with. He's very sensitive about it
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 11:28
|
|
|
'mad eye' is actually his legal name, and thus like Remus Lupin becoming a were wolf, twas fate
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 16:51
|
|
|
Aurors are like the Silverhawks. The Ministry forcibly replaces their organs with superior mechanical ones, leaving them with barely any humanity. Moody just got stuck with an old prototype eye that was never used again.
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 17:27
|
|
|
And then Magic Goebbels turns it into the most evil of magiteks: an Amazon Ring doorbell
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 18:24
|
|
|
Lunar Suite posted:And then Magic Goebbels turns it into the most evil of magiteks: an Amazon Ring doorbell Which is interesting, as it either implies that Umbridge had a weirdly personal grudge against Moody to make his signature doodad into a personal trophy (and I dunno how much they even interacted, if ever) OR that it's such a rare artifact that you can't just go out and buy something that does the same thing and have to repurpose a dead guy's prosthetics in such a gristly way. What, did he originally get it as a special favor from Odin or something?
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 18:57
|
|
|
Odin would probably count as a Dark Wizard
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 19:44
|
|
|
Would Gandalf be a Dark Wizard
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 19:59
|
|
|
Feldegast42 posted:Would Gandalf be a Dark Wizard What? No, he's the Hogwarts Headmaster, that would be crazy
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 20:04
|
|
|
Feldegast42 posted:Would Gandalf be a Dark Wizard He came back from the dead... suspicious.
|
|
#
?
Apr 6, 2024 20:57
|
|
|
YaketySass posted:He came back from the dead... suspicious.
|
|
#
?
Apr 7, 2024 00:24
|
|
|
You can't just change from grey to white, that's against wizard biology!!!!
|
|
#
?
Apr 7, 2024 16:00
|
|
|
yea, a wizard should know better
|
|
#
?
Apr 7, 2024 16:37
|
|
|
Cranappleberry posted:yea, a wizard should know better In Harry Potter World? gently caress no, they shouldn't
|
|
#
?
Apr 7, 2024 16:41
|
|
|
josh04 posted:Around book 5 there's a clear decision that we have quite enough spells and potions now and the rest of the series can just mix and match them. Except zombies, gotta add some zombies. The shift in how magic works is one of the weirdest things in the inconsistent world building of the setting. I guess maybe the problem was when she stopped drawing from children's lit where a lot of her more whimsical or supernatural ideas came from? The shift in book 4/5 is when you can tell she bought into the idea that she was writing the greatest modern fiction stories, so she needed to "adult up" the setting and 90% of fights became shooting magic bullets around. Because she's kind of dull, and wasn't referencing stories that used magic in an interesting ways, she couldn't contemplate the truly horrific potential magic opens up in a more "adult" setting. Or even one that's still approachable to all ages, but acknowledges the infinite ways magic could be used to hurt people, distort physical reality, and cause mass destruction in the wrong hands. This is a long ramble to I guess arrive at the conclusion that anyone who loathes any aspect of how Harry Potter fails would love Witch Hat Atelier: https://w1.atelierwitch.com/ It's a manga that's clearly inspired by Harry Potter, but it seriously contemplates the implications of keeping the secret of magic hidden from the world, the innate cruelty of an insular society of shut-ins, accessibility issues, the serious harm magic has caused in the world in the past, competent adults who are also complete messes, queer characters, and also gorgeous art.
|
|
#
?
Apr 7, 2024 22:01
|
|
|
Harry Potter is stupid. Harry Potter is stupid. Give up. Give up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDfrrgqy_Eo
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 00:35
|
|
|
Vincent Van Goatse posted:Harry Potter is stupid. You keep posting like this as if 99% of this thread isn't already people dunking on how stupid Harry Potter is. You're preaching to the choir here bro, you don't have to blow our minds by telling us to read better books. We already did years ago. This is just something that everyone in the developed world under the age of 40 read at one point because it was a shared cultural phenomenon that we can look back on in hindsight and collectively go "man... this is actually kinda stupid, isn't it?"
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 01:00
|
|
|
Asterite34 posted:You keep posting like this as if 99% of this thread isn't already people dunking on how stupid Harry Potter is. You're preaching to the choir here bro, you don't have to blow our minds by telling us to read better books. We already did years ago. This is just something that everyone in the developed world under the age of 40 read at one point because it was a shared cultural phenomenon that we can look back on in hindsight and collectively go "man... this is actually kinda stupid, isn't it?" I just like saying Harry Potter is stupid. I'm not loving judging you for reading it.
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 01:01
|
|
|
Vincent Van Goatse posted:I just like saying Harry Potter is stupid. I'm not loving judging you for reading it. ...you know what, fair enough. Glad we're on the same page
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 01:03
|
|
|
posting about how much harry potter sucks in the harry potter sucks thread?? good sir you have gone too far
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 12:31
|
|
|
harry potter is the greatest book series ever written and will one day surpass the bible in sales
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 13:07
|
|
|
Nuns with Guns posted:The shift in how magic works is one of the weirdest things in the inconsistent world building of the setting. I guess maybe the problem was when she stopped drawing from children's lit where a lot of her more whimsical or supernatural ideas came from? The shift in book 4/5 is when you can tell she bought into the idea that she was writing the greatest modern fiction stories, so she needed to "adult up" the setting and 90% of fights became shooting magic bullets around. Because she's kind of dull, and wasn't referencing stories that used magic in an interesting ways, she couldn't contemplate the truly horrific potential magic opens up in a more "adult" setting. Or even one that's still approachable to all ages, but acknowledges the infinite ways magic could be used to hurt people, distort physical reality, and cause mass destruction in the wrong hands. It really says a lot that the last time there was any hint of creativity in a wizard fight was in book 5 where Dumbledore was transfiguring things around him, using elemental magic and making The Racism Statues come to life. Rowling only ever puts in effort when it comes to her pet character.
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 13:21
|
|
|
Hermione barely thinks outside the box in terms of practical magic and is considered the brightest wizard of her age by far. If it wasn’t spelled out in text you can’t just magically create food id just assume no wizard ever thought of it yet.
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 13:59
|
|
|
bobjr posted:Hermione barely thinks outside the box in terms of practical magic and is considered the brightest wizard of her age by far. "If we just magically created food out of nowhere then what would our legions of enslaved elves do all day?"
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 15:16
|
|
|
Wingnut Ninja posted:"If we just magically created food out of nowhere then what would our legions of enslaved elves do all day?" Fix the plumbing they constantly clog with their horrific wizard dumps?
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 16:09
|
|
|
Vincent Van Goatse posted:Fix the plumbing they constantly clog with their horrific wizard dumps? No that's what the Basilisk was for Why do you think it wanted to kill everyone so much?
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 16:18
|
|
|
Vincent Van Goatse posted:Fix the plumbing they constantly clog with their horrific wizard dumps? Fix? Then they wouldn't have anything left to do, and you know how they are, they just love to work, can't do without it. Next thing you'll suggest freeing them, how silly would that be!
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 16:20
|
|
|
all zis English food eez too heavy. I am taking le dumps énorme
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 16:28
|
|
|
Dear Parent and/or Guardian, Due to Level 5 diarrhea flood, all toilets at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry are currently out of order and we are temporarily housing Slytherin students in the Great Hall.
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 16:38
|
|
|
You can't just magic up food. But you can multiply it which would I guess be just as good? Or summon it directly from the shop without paying.
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 17:28
|
|
|
Speleothing posted:You can't just magic up food. But you can multiply it which would I guess be just as good? Or summon it directly from the shop without paying. How much can you multiply it? Can you turn a stray crumb into a whole loaf of bread? Can you homeopathy this poo poo and use the logic that "well there must be at least one molecule of food here somewhere?" Asterite34 fucked around with this message at 19:28 on Apr 8, 2024 |
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 17:50
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 8, 2024 21:07 |
|
|
Shiterin, Griffinturd, Hufflepoop, Ravencrap
|
|
#
?
Apr 8, 2024 19:09
|
|