Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


List of things you can do in Torn:

Buy something from a trader and immediately mug them to get part of your money back
Quit your job at the local supermarket and rob the tills on your way out (just like real life!)
Break people out of jail
Place bounties so other stronger players come in and kick someone's rear end for you
Rig pubbie forum games or poker games for both fun and for profit
Gay marry a fellow goon and live naked together on your own personal private island
Get addicted to drugs and go to Switzerland for rehab
Throw a brick at someone's face
Join in on faction chains and territory wars, where we all gently caress up a bunch of pubbie clowns at the same time and steal their poo poo
Try to burn down a warehouse and end up in the hospital with 3rd degree burns
Operate an international stuffed animal smuggling ring
Freely attack anyone at any time, and either steal their money or put them in the hospital for hours
Drop some drugs, eat 49 boxes of chocolate, and hit the gym to GET SWOLE


Almost all of us were brand new a few months ago, and we've already started multiple faction fights by doing dumb poo poo and pissing people off. Just this week we captured our first territory by kicking a whole lot of asses, and one of the recipients of those rear end kickings is still so pissed that they've launched a personal vendetta against one of our members and is dumping real world cash into the game to try and get back at us.

poo poo is fun, come be gay and do crimes with us!

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


super sweet best pal posted:

Don't do this. The store's candy and energy drink inventory is worth way more on the open market.

Nah the player owned jobs are way better than the garbage Grocer starter job.

A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


I have days where my total interaction with this game is less than 5 minutes.

You can set timers and be a min/max freak lord to milk every single thing for your character, and you can spend time starting poo poo or market flipping or hanging out with us on discord, but if you wanna set no timers and barely log in you'll still progress nicely.

If you really wanna get some tears there's a thing called "buy mugging" where you buy something expensive from someone off the market and immediately mug them to steal part of your money back. It drives people insane, can be very profitable, and takes less than one minute to complete.

A GIANT PARSNIP fucked around with this message at 18:16 on May 16, 2020

A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


“The only thing you are doing is wasting your money. On an unrelated note, I have stopped playing this game.” - Minxo

A GIANT PARSNIP fucked around with this message at 13:45 on May 20, 2020

A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


You can trade when you're in the hospital and if you're gonna shove through a $450M transaction you should do that. Remember to turn off revives in your options first.

A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


We had our first goon meltdown.

We’re a real goon group now :unsmith:

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

A GIANT PARSNIP
Apr 13, 2010

Too much fuckin' eggnog


Foehammer007 posted:

and now we all burn :flame:

Good news - I think we stopped burning.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply