|
|
the internet of things is a revolutionary move in the technology cutting edge world. finally, after years of you asking for it, you got it. the internet of things offers unprecedented access between your things. at last, my fridge can speak to my toilet, to ask it what it’s like in the bathroom and how it feels have people pee in you. I turn to the camera and smile and say, it really changes what it means to log on |
#
¿
May 17, 2020 12:43
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 16, 2024 17:26 |
|
|
|
I’m in an important meeting at work you see I work in the economy (the electric conomy) and I get a text I look down and see that my Maytag is letting me know I have a medically unhealthy amount of nut milks
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 12:45
|
|
|
|
I’m out with a very strong attractive woman who is telling me roller derby is the future of sport I am in love I think my alarm clock calls to tell me my neighbour is muttering about killing me again
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 12:47
|
|
|
|
target is having a special on wire brushed frames that will tell your nest if the pH in the room is too basic. the nest, which contains a non-functional microphone, will chart changes in ambient acidity in the nsa cloud to let them know if you are baking cookies or crystal meth
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 12:49
|
|
|
|
my toilet seat: good morning sire, I do believe you have lost some weight me: *lifts my legs off the ground* my toilet seat: lmao never mind
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 12:50
|
|
|
|
me to my millions of viewers: it may hold the holy scriptures and the meaning of life and the universe, but will it blend? my blender: it is going to blend me: you ruin everything
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 12:55
|
|
|
|
my toilet won't stop moaning despite the mute function
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 15:27
|
|
|
|
finally, email for my things
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 18:10
|
|
|
|
checking my roomba data to see what rooms I shed the most in. sharing my findings on twitter
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 18:11
|
|
|
|
I’ve been getting robbed a lot more since my door started screaming that it was unlocked
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 22:22
|
|
|
|
but honestly it’s a global village and I’ve never get more connected
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2020 22:22
|
|
|
|
me to my hot, powerful date with washboard abs and a strong mind and earnest heart: I’ll go grab us a snack my smart pipes while I’m gone: I hope you like diarrhea
|
|
#
¿
May 19, 2020 00:44
|
|
|
|
my digital cupboard: this is a lot of Kraft dinner
|
|
#
¿
May 21, 2020 21:06
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 16, 2024 17:26 |
|
|
|
Jaguars! posted:Toilet: father, father, cleaaan me father I am coated with nastieessssss have I not served you faithfullyyyyyy lmfbo
|
|
#
¿
May 23, 2020 22:27
|
|