Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

"Please, tell me more about this "bidet" of yours," I say to the person at the party. I'll let them continue their long winded diatribe about their cute little toilet seat. My rear end-wiping robot has spoiled me, true- but I have an opportunity to browbeat my opponent from heights previously heretofore unknown, and I cannot wait to pounce...

alexandriao posted:

the robot wipes its rear end or it doesnt see sunlight again

stop being gross robot

google THIS posted:

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?