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cda

by Hand Knit
A robot may not make a human's rear end dirty or, by inaction, allow a human rear end to become dirty.

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cda

by Hand Knit
A robot must wipe the rear end of a human except where it would conflict with the first law.

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cda

by Hand Knit
A robot must wipe its own rear end as long as doing so does not conflict with the first or second law.

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cda

by Hand Knit
the robot feels no shame wiping the rear end

cda

by Hand Knit
the robot was sent back in time to wipe the rear end of a young man named John Connor

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cda

by Hand Knit

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

lol

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