Dogs are good. Humans are cruel, stupid beasts

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > Dogs are good. Humans are cruel, stupid beasts

bio force ape: Apr 3, 2016

most people aren't mentally and emotionally equipped to do animal husbandry on a murderdog, however they are perfectly capable of being pets. they were never meant to be in the hands of civilians and now our shelters are overrun by them. it suxx bc I like them but the ones I know are the exception to the rule bc people are dumb assholes.

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:34

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# ? May 9, 2024 01:01

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

pit bulls should probably just be euthanized en masse in order to prevent every hare brained doofus from going out and rescuing 2-3 and then neglecting them in a perpetual cycle of violence and stupidity

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:37

Evrart Claire: Jan 11, 2008

One of my high school acquaintances is a huge pit bull advocate who loves to talk about how friendly her pit bull is because it's the "owner, not the breed" and she raised it right. Just like, don't bring any other animal when visiting, tell your kid to keep their distance, don't make any sudden movements or raise your voice when near her or the dog, etc.

(She had two pits previously that she will not under any circumstance talk about why/how she "lost" both of them at the same time)

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:39

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

i have run the numbers and apparently a pitbull does 5-6 benghazis each year in america. if pitbulls were democrats, they would spend several full working weeks each year testifying in front of house and senate committees over these benghazis

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:50

Big Dick Cheney: Mar 30, 2007

Victory Position posted:

coonhound

Yikes

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:50

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

he's just a little hungry, i say as i pet my growling pit on the head and he clamps down on my hand

haha he's just playing. he tears the hand off and noisely devours it

oh he just does that sometimes, you just have to have your palms out when you reach toward him. I've been thinking of getting him a new chew toy

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:54

Frog Act: Feb 10, 2012

Dolphin posted:

he's just a little hungry, i say as i pet my growling pit on the head and he clamps down on my hand

haha he's just playing. he tears the hand off and noisely devours it

oh he just does that sometimes. I've been thinking of getting him a new chew toy

according to my weed guy severe bites that result in losing use of your hand for over a week and having to wrap it in thick bandages are just a normal part of pitbull ownership. while he said this, one of his two pitbulls was jumping on me and gnawing at my hand

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:55

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

why don't they make the entire pitbull out of weed

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:57

Terminal autist: May 17, 2018; by vyelkin

Feeling like a conservative quoting fbi crime statistics but uhh yeah pitbulls are consistently the most common breed to murder children so there is that. I'm sure you could make a really tedious argument about the popularity of the breed and socio-economics. That being said I've been around lovely super kind pits but they were not rescued and owner spoiled them more than her kids. I've had rescue dogs my entire life and its so fulfilling to see those dogs grow but most still have some form of extreme trauma or stress that manifests in totally unpredictable fashion. I would imagine its a lot easier to calm down retriever who becomes inconsolable if someone slams a door or stomps their feet than a pit who is genetically designed to maul children.

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:57

a very large fish: Oct 18, 2012

one of my friends has a pit and she was going on facebook tirades about how it's the owner etc... then a few days ago it bit one of her toddlers on the face. Guess she's just a lovely owner.

# ? Jul 23, 2020 15:57

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

if we got rid of the worst murderdogs the owners would just get rottweilers instead, then bulldogs and whatever else they can abuse until it murders daily

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:00

VideoKid: Jul 28, 2006; Avatar War

My cousin has two pit bulls and ones a good dog and the other just pees on everything. Once at a party the dog peed on one of my Aunt�s designer purses that coat like $5k so that was pretty funny.

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:01

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

did u kno a pitbull is 90% more likely to be killed by another pitbull than a cop? why don't u protest that libs

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:02

Dave Concepcion: Mar 19, 2012

didn't lowtax own and/or advocate for pitbulls?

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:03

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

[low tax tweting at his pitbull] god hates you

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:04

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

dick wizard posted:

one of my friends has a pit and she was going on facebook tirades about how it's the owner etc... then a few days ago it bit one of her toddlers on the face. Guess she's just a lovely owner.

for some reason people think being nice to a murder machine is adequate socialization but actual socialization is a painstaking process that most owners don't know the first thing about so they should probably just get a french bulldog

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:04

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

the worse thing about pit bulls is the owners. emancipate the put bulls. to the streets let them roam

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:05

Dave Concepcion: Mar 19, 2012

Dolphin posted:

for some reason people think being nice to a murder machine is adequate socialization but actual socialization is a painstaking process that most owners don't know the first thing about so they should probably just get a french bulldog

a french bulldog is a tortured little being that can't breathe properly, why not get a nice normal dog with functioning airways?

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:08

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

You know who else wanted to exterminate an entire breed...

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:08

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

look at this poor little babby in jail

all he did was eat a jogger, let him out

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:09

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

Dave Concepcion posted:

a french bulldog is a tortured little being that can't breathe properly, why not get a nice normal dog with functioning airways?

100% serious, unless you're getting a working dog and actually using it for work a mutt is almost always the better choice

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:10

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Dave Concepcion posted:

a french bulldog is a tortured little being that can't breathe properly, why not get a nice normal dog with functioning airways?

wikipedia tells me all you have to do is hose it off with extremely frigid water 3 times a day and it'll be fine

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:13

Dave Concepcion: Mar 19, 2012

Mayor Dave posted:

100% serious, unless you're getting a working dog and actually using it for work a mutt is almost always the better choice

yeah mutts own

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:16

Atrocious Joe: Sep 2, 2011

this thread is antisemitic

quote:

The Jews of the Canine World
Pit bulls have been unfairly stereotyped as genetically dangerous monsters. Sound familiar?
BY MARJORIE INGALL
JUNE 13, 2016

I�ve always loved dogs that look like pit bulls: wide and smiling faces, goofy expressions, broad chests, sturdy bodies, short coats, enthusiastic tails. I grew up not knowing about dog fighting, or about this breed�s vicious reputation. My terror was reserved for German shepherds (my equally frightened little brother tremulously called them �sheffers�), with their pointy, mean faces and loud barks. There were some territorial ones in the yards in my Providence, Rhode Island, neighborhood.

But after moving to New York, I came to understand that pit bulls are hated. My little East Village copy shop, where we got Josie�s bat mitzvah invitations, has a big, short-coated, wide-chested, flat-faced dog behind the counter. His name is Curtis. He comes when you call and accepts head-pats with dignity. But when I asked the owner, Santo, what kind of dog Curtis was, he hesitated. �He�s a mix,� Santo said. �Terrier, other things � pit bull.� He clearly was reluctant to say those two words. He thought I�d recoil.

You know what people say about pit bulls: Violence is in their genes. They have double rows of teeth. Their jaws can unhinge like a snake�s. Their jaws lock after they bite. They don�t feel pain the way other dogs do. In 1987, U.S. News and World Report called them �the most dangerous dog in America,� able to �chomp through chain-link fences.� The Guardian called pit bulls �dogs of war who can bite through concrete.� Time called them �time bombs on legs� and started a story on them with a quote from The Hound of the Baskervilles:

Fire burst from its open mouth, its eyes glowed with a smouldering glare, its muzzle and hackles and dewlap were outlined in flickering flame. Never in the delirious dream of a disordered brain could anything more savage, more appalling, more hellish, be conceived than that dark form and savage face.
A friend had her family dog genetically tested, and when she discovered it had some pit bull lineage, she gave it away. Her kids sobbed. But what if the dog just lost it one day? That�s what pit bulls do, right?

None of this, of course, is true. Bronwen Dickey�s fascinating new book Pit Bull: The Battle Over an American Icon charts the evolution of pit bull stereotyping. (It begins with a quote from Andr� Gide: �There are very few monsters who warrant the fear we have of them.�) In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, pit bulls were considered the family-friendliest dogs. Dogs that looked like them served in the Battle of Gettysburg and in Normandy. One accompanied Laura Ingalls Wilder�s family in their covered-wagon journey across the prairie. Helen Keller owned and adored one. Another (named Votes!) accompanied suffragist Virginia Watrous on the campaign trail in 1915. Still another starred in the �His Master�s Voice� campaign for RCA and another in the �Our Gang� kiddie comedies. Dickey observes that pit bulls were then seen as �quintessentially American: good-natured, brave, resilient, and dependable.� But within a few decades, they�d become DNA-driven vicious beasts, �biologically hardwired to kill.�

You know what these stereotypes and assumptions, the notion that genetic heritage will out, reminds me of? Yup. The historic beliefs about Jewish phrenology and physiognomy, the idea that we have horns, the notion that we�re genetically driven to be shifty, money-grubbing, and pervy. They�re as grounded in truth as stereotypes about pit bulls�the Jews of the canine world.

https://www.tabletmag.com/sections/community/articles/pit-bulls-jews-of-the-canine-world

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:18

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

yeah, you guys arguing that pits are dangerous are literally the same as pol pot

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:20

panascope: Mar 26, 2005

Drowning In Terror posted:

Stereotypical female pibble owners are worse than stereotypical male pitbull owners change my mind

this is true with no exceptions

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:21

Dolphin: Dec 5, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

yeah, women are the worst. when they own pitbulls.

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:23

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:23

Dave Concepcion: Mar 19, 2012

is claiming that herd dogs might be predisposed to be good at herding also literal nazism?

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:24

DarkEuphoria: Nov 7, 2012

most dog owners should not own dogs. it seems that almost no one knows how to properly train a dog, and owners are not willing or able to put in the work to learn how, in a way that is fair and ethical to the dog.

humans are cruel, stupid beasts

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:25

Dustcat: Jan 26, 2019

a pitbull can instinctively heil hitler. responsible owners train it out of them

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:26

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

DarkEuphoria posted:

most dog owners should not own dogs. it seems that almost no one knows how to properly train a dog, and owners are not willing or able to put in the work to learn how, in a way that is fair and ethical to the dog.

humans are cruel, stupid beasts

it's unfortunate because if you do know how to raise a dog they own

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:27

a very large fish: Oct 18, 2012

My pyr treats the yard and my kids like they're her property. Does she need more socialization??

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:27

Giga Gaia: May 2, 2006; 360 kickflip to... Meteo?!

DarkEuphoria posted:

most dog owners should not own dogs. it seems that almost no one knows how to properly train a dog, and owners are not willing or able to put in the work to learn how, in a way that is fair and ethical to the dog.

humans are cruel, stupid beasts

my furbabies need heckin boops

# ? Jul 23, 2020 16:27