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Mozi posted:magic was ill-defined in lotr. elves and maiar and whatnot could do weird things. gandalf never slings any fireballs around he has a big fight with the wraiths and summons lightning i think but it's all told from far away from a hill and they don't know what's actually going on and only find out gandalf is having a epic battle later on. gary oldmans diary posted:so i stopped reading it. problem solved fair
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Aug 3, 2020 15:23
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Caesar Saladin posted:i'm basically tom bombadil IRL I know I'd ruin your forest if I came to live in it, I'd like to (but I am an orc.)
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Aug 3, 2020 15:37
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The ringwraiths at the river scene made perfect sense to me at the time because they hesitated before committing to crossing the river even though frodo just fuckin' darted across.. Like they knew something wasn't right and this was probably a bad idea. Then they finally said gently caress it and went for it, then got murdered by a bunch of seahorses and it was like, surprise! Your instincts as murder ghosts were correct! Not sayin' you're wrong for feelin' the way you feel, but it seems like one of those situations where you have to be totally immersed for everything to fall into place.
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Aug 3, 2020 15:51
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Tolkien's approach to magic being mystical and poo poo is great compared to the abortion Vance came up with that's been plaguing the nerd genres ever since.
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Aug 3, 2020 16:40
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gary oldmans diary posted:this resolution of the climactic situation with *surprise magic* explained several pages into the next book/chapter was very dissatisfying. every possible problem can be solved that way elf magic is supposed to be mysterious! gandalf isn't going to explain that elrond wields vilya the ring of air and has special powers over his chosen lands like galadriel does over lorien.
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Aug 3, 2020 16:44
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Nazgul boss's "NO MAN CAN KILL ME" boast is pretty drat weak when there's women, elves, dwarves, hobbits and whatnot all over the place and even men can gently caress him up with a torch no problem. I bet the guy has all sorts of life threatening allergies. All Sauron's henchpersons suck poo poo. Even the balrogs
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Aug 3, 2020 16:55
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I used to be a Big Reader when I was younger. Really Hit The Books hard, if you know what I mean. Tried reading the Ol' Hobbs there expecting some elfs and wizards and poo poo and noped out of that nap tome like "nah bro I'd rather read Dickens, even". Sick filth is what it is.
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Aug 3, 2020 16:58
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to be fair those poor dudes are blind as gently caress and need their mounts to see for them. everyone is beating up a bunch of disabled guys and then legolas murders his guide dragon 
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Aug 3, 2020 17:01
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Big Beef City posted:noped out of that nap tome like "nah bro I'd rather read Dickens, even". Sick filth is what it is.
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Aug 3, 2020 17:04
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Pro Tip: You don't HAVE to read the books to take those book quiz things to earn free personal pan pizzas just guess at that poo poo I mean most of them are pretty easy to guess if you can figure out the basic plots of most books!
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Aug 3, 2020 17:07
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If you happen to be in New Zealand visiting Hobbiton is super cool and you can see the fake tree OP it's still just hanging out. They also give you free beers and I highly suggest you pocket the cups.
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Aug 3, 2020 17:10
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Aug 3, 2020 17:15
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I remember when two towers was coming out and the newspaper ran tips for enduring a three hour movie, like recommending putting your wallet in your front pocket. I really liked the RTS game that gave you a full campaign as the bad guys and when your ogres leveled up they started wearing helmets, and could brandish trees. Checking YouTube got confirmation the battle of the five armies from the last hobbit movie is more ridiculous than I remembered. I recalled the dwarves riding pigs and rams and having ballistas that fire twirling chains to knock elf arrows out of the sky, but I forgot about the orcs having sandworms or the elf riding a moose.
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Aug 3, 2020 18:00
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Hyrax Attack! posted:I remember when two towers was coming out and the newspaper ran tips for enduring a three hour movie, like recommending putting your wallet in your front pocket. Remember when two towers was coming out and tabloids said they should change the name of the movie because it’s insensitive to 9/11
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Aug 3, 2020 18:05
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They're playing old movies in the theatres here since the pandemic shut down all the new movies so I took 2 grams of shrooms and went to go see LOTR1 (the long version, it was 3 hours and 48 minutes total) in the theatre last week. It was amazing and I cried like 3 times. The second and third ones aren't as good as the first one since there's more "big battle" and less "gay hobbits" but they're pretty good too. There's not a lot of other big movies where big handsome men act soft and kind. e: also gently caress the hobbit movies they're trash.
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Aug 3, 2020 18:08
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The first actor who played The Mountain from Game of Thrones hosed off from the show to be some random bullshit orc in The Hobbit instead. Smart move.
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Aug 3, 2020 18:22
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The Hobbit movies sucked rear end but Martin Freeman was pretty much born to play Bilbo Baggins. The Hobbit should have been one very fun movie with riddles and spiders and a dragon and a battle but Warner Bros wanted to actually be Smaug the dragon and bully NZ to gently caress over its own labor laws so they could make three dumb bloated movies instead.
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Aug 3, 2020 22:02
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The dwarf songs in the Hobbit were pretty great, i liked those bits
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Aug 3, 2020 22:08
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Icochet posted:All Sauron's henchpersons suck poo poo. Even the balrogs Alright listen here. 1: Hench people and lastly the Balrogs were NOT Sauron's minions.
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Aug 3, 2020 22:11
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Aug 3, 2020 22:19
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Alright listen here. 1: Hench people and lastly the Balrogs were NOT Sauron's minions. If you don't think for a hot second Sauron couldn't have looked at a Balrog and been like "Listen. We go way back. Same Age, even. Been a long time. Listen. You're an elemental based form of anger devised and formed by a God to wreak some serious poo poo. And that's great. And you did great. That was a long time ago and you're still around. That's cool. Listen. I'm a shattered reflection of that same god's power incorporate in this Age, now, aaaaand I was thinking maybe you'd like a paycheck?" In otherwords, he would have totally owned them outright he just didn't ask.
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Aug 3, 2020 22:22
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Hyrax Attack! posted:I remember when two towers was coming out and the newspaper ran tips for enduring a three hour movie, like recommending putting your wallet in your front pocket. Jesus lol I saw it 11 times in the cinema. Watched even more often the making of's and extras on the extended set than the films themselves. Yet I watched 1.5 of the Hobbit movies, I think I skipped the second one and couldn't make it through the first one entirely. A friend dragged me to see the third one in theater and all I remember was a very long and boring fight sequence at the end and Legolas jumping on falling rocks. Like the one thing I hated about LOTR, the moments where Legolas would go full Hollywood action sequence, they pushed it to 11... less cringey than the singing, still. Never seen the LOTR trilogy on shrooms though that must be quite something.
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Aug 3, 2020 22:28
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Chrs posted:Remember when two towers was coming out and tabloids said they should change the name of the movie because it’s insensitive to 9/11 Two and a Half Towers
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Aug 3, 2020 23:00
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Bronze Fonz posted:Jesus lol I saw it 11 times in the cinema. I wish they'd killed off Legolas in Hobbit 2. Just have his body careening down the river and over a waterfall. Give fans something to talk about.
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Aug 3, 2020 23:30
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Bronze Fonz posted:Never seen the LOTR trilogy on shrooms though that must be quite something. It was so great, everyone's huge eyes and big emotions and everything is so good on empathy drugs. They're playing the second one this week and I'm gonna go see it tomorrow but I think I might be a bit disappointed in comparison.
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Aug 3, 2020 23:43
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gently caress, lotr on shrooms sounds loving amazing
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Aug 3, 2020 23:52
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Colonel Cancer posted:Tolkien's approach to magic being mystical and poo poo is great compared to the abortion Vance came up with that's been plaguing the nerd genres ever since. THIS IS BAIT AND I AM TAKING IT JERRY
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Aug 4, 2020 00:30
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bones 4 beginners posted:Faramir was my favorite character and these movies made both him and Denethor look so awful. Every scene with Denethor is cringe worthy and they made Faramir so spineless and pathetic. I will never understand people complaining about movie Faramir. Like "oh no this guy sucks because the ring briefly tempted him and then he managed to not be tempted" like that isn't the entire schtick of the ring, and anyone who is able to shake it off isn't definitely a cool dude.  And the other complaint that he was too mean to Gollum, in the book he still threatens to murder Gollum for using a pond lol. Like, that isn't worse than briefly letting some of his men beat him up. Grape fucked around with this message at 01:19 on Aug 4, 2020 |
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Aug 4, 2020 01:17
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They should have just killed gollum the first time they saw him imo
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Aug 4, 2020 01:23
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Big Beef City posted:They should have just killed gollum the first time they saw him imo Yeah but for such a doofus reason? It bugged me as a kid, immediately made me think "these guys are weird assholes". "This is the sacred pond of MelloYello, to swim in it is a death penalty, I don't make the rules!" Like that's still in the movies, but then they kind of depict Faramir and his dudes as beleaguered as hell guerrilla fighters who are also fighting the battle of medieval Stalingrad and losing, so you kind of forgive them being assholes.
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Aug 4, 2020 01:27
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Well you see Lord of the Rings features unpeople like Gollum and the orcs and funny brown people on top of fantasy elephants who really should only be killed because their very existence is offensive That's fantasy in a nutshell for u
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Aug 4, 2020 01:30
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It was good and perfectly timed to come out when I was a nerdy teenager. Sucks for anyone in here who was a dumb babby or gen x'er. I started working thru the extras but I was not high enough level to complete it.
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Aug 4, 2020 01:32
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Grape posted:I will never understand people complaining about movie Faramir. I remember seeing the movie completely ignorant of the books, and thinking Faramir was fine but also kind-of a retread of Boromir only "psyche he doesn't take it." And I remember it didn't exactly work, not because there was anything particularly wrong or annoying... I guess I just didn't feel the vibe they were putting out. For as insanely impressive as those movies were, they still often failed to give a solid context for what "normal" is for anyone but Hobbits.
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Aug 4, 2020 03:01
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Grape posted:I will never understand people complaining about movie Faramir. In the books Faramir doesn't want to kill Gollum, but the law says he has to. He doesn't kill Gollum anyway because Frodo speaks up for him. He then treats Gollum humanely for the rest of his captivity. In the movie the only reason that Frodo speaking up saves Gollum is so that Faramir's men can torture and interrogate Gollum, so that they can find out what he knows about Frodo. In the books Faramir is constantly looking for an excuse for mercy, in the movies he immediately resorts to casual brutality. All of his cleverness and wisdom in the books are completely absent in the movie version, which has him trying to do a bad Boromir impression.
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Aug 4, 2020 04:44
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hemale in pain posted:to be fair those poor dudes are blind as gently caress and need their mounts to see for them. everyone is beating up a bunch of disabled guys and then legolas murders his guide dragon Imagine if Hitler had a seeing eye dog
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Aug 4, 2020 04:54
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lotr movies own, bakshi movies own, CGI hobbit is such poo poo
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Aug 4, 2020 05:38
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"[img posted:https://i.imgur.com/G3TtrgB.jpg[/img]"]Ring a dong dillo! Ring a dong!
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Aug 4, 2020 07:08
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i'm not optimistic about the amazon show
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Aug 4, 2020 07:15
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I rewatch them every year or two because the mood and scenery are pretty much perfect. The story is fine, the action is pretty good but has too much goofy poo poo (legolas surfing on an elephant) that stands out too much, and gimli might as well be wearing a clown suit the whole time. But I’m a sucker for the shire, rivendell, rohan, the forests, and just all the detail crammed into every scene. Edit: oh, and Galadriel - when she meets the fellowship and Frodo offers her the ring is one of the most memorable scenes in any movie to me for some reason. I finally watched the whole hobbit trilogy (extended editions) for the first time last year and they are incredibly bad. I think the only parts I liked were when Legolas’s hot dad was on screen. Bad Purchase fucked around with this message at 07:28 on Aug 4, 2020 |
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Aug 4, 2020 07:23
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Funky See Funky Do posted:I think they might objectively be the best movies ever made. And this is why the OP will never get laid
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Aug 4, 2020 07:44
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