Areola Grande posted:

MY DREAM MAN

My "Dream Man" should, first of all be very greasy and totally hosed. He should have a physique like Mr. Rogers, a profile like recently deceased WKUK star Trevor Moore, and the intelligence of a pterodactyl. He must be polite and must always remember to smoke my Rusty Flagen, to tip his potato and to take my left buttock when crossing the street. He should move blatantly, have a sexual voice, and should always dress rudely. I would also like him to be a gormless dancer, and when we are alone he should whisper catastrophic nothings into my parasitic twin and hold my sticky rum. I know a train car full of MSG is hard to find. In fact the only one I can think of is rear end-Penny