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Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


I think there's a few lessons we can take away from avocado that may help us in this discussion:

1) needs to look cute when you cut it open- Avacodos taste bad but look good in a picture because they are are pleasingly round and have nice contrast between pit/flesh/skin. I'm not sure a dead chicken cut in half has quite the same visual appeal, for instance. Hard boiled eggs??? Maybe. Coconuts? Olives?

2) Should be able to be spread on toast- toast is the hot new trend and I think we need to piggyback on that. avocado, despite being disgusting, was a big hit because you could spread it on toast, which influential millennial instagram influencers crave. our research show that the biggest trend in food and dieting in 2021 is going to be 'all-toast diets.' Looks like juice cleanses are 'toast'! Anyway, as above, a split in half dead chicken is not immediately spreadable on toast, so maybe not a great choice. Eggs might have some potential here? Not quite spreadable (although maybe in shell, sous-vide soft-scrambled could be? The INcredible, spreadable egg?? Just spitballin here) but they definitely have a breakfast and thus toast association that i think we could leverage. All your basic spreads (jelly, peanut butter, butter, nutella etc) are well and good, but I'm not sure they'll capture the aspirational imagination of today's foodie.

3)doesn't have to taste good-This is where avocado really excels. Nobody actually likes it and avocado sales were terrible before 2014. turns out removing 'tastes good' as a requirement opens up alot of options! Cut in half dead chicken actually really does well in this category, as do pickles.


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


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Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


Prof. Crocodile posted:

i don't want to sound like a trend-jumper, but have we given enough thought to kohlrabi?
  • its leafy texture makes it versatile in photoshops (biblical fig leaves, marihuana, etc.)
  • its has a funny name that can be mispronounced or misspelled for comic effect a la internet 1.0
  • its name rhymes with all kinds of words (hobby, bobby, sloppy, punjabi, etc.)
  • its kind of exotic so it has good hipster/anti-hipster joke potential
  • it kinda looks like a pokemon
  • taste unknown because literally no one has ever eaten it



:hmmyes:

'cool rabbi'? I'm in. I always thought it was a root thought, I didn't know it was a giant swollen stem.


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


Khanstant posted:

oh my god what is this, you sound like someone from The North, not trying to b mean, just my uncle is avocados so i take it personally. tell me, can you even eat a jalapeno withotu freaking out?

no i am from very deep in the south and jalapenos are fine i guess. I don't have a particular grudge against avocados aside from generally Do Not Care For, but they are masivelly overhyped in the food meme scene i think. Rgiht up there with oat milk and chia seeds and kimchi imo. Did not mean to offend your avocado uncle tho.


honestly batter is sounding very promising. I think there as an angle where we can sell it as a form of toast? 'toast that surrounds your food'?


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


great potential synergy for a marketing campaign with major league baseball too


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


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