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Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020



It bears mentioning that this "pizza bread" apparently doesn't even have garlic on it, only garlic oil (good for people with FODMAP intolerance, I guess) and is "pastry baked"?! What is it, then? Pizza, bread or pastry? Irish or American? Make up your drat mind, marketeers!

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Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020



My head-canon is that that's not a "deep dish cheese pizza" but rather a hollowed out wheel of cheese filled with more cheese (and pasta).

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


SniperWoreConverse posted:

it's the wetness, it's always the wetness



That's not a pizza that's a river land. The rivers might be flowing with oil, but it's a river land none the less.

edit: or is it more like this?

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


Non Compos Mentis posted:

why is it so wet

As usual I suspect the answer to that question is once again "grease".

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


Do they bake it with the coleslaw?

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


The thing about UK chips vs Belgian/French/US fries is that they are really different things, like a slice of toast vs a slice of brioche, or New York vs Chicago or even deep dish style pizza. If you go in craving and expecting one thing and getting the other, you are not set up to have a good time with it.

Griddle of Love fucked around with this message at 20:41 on Feb 21, 2024

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


If you wanted cheese based text on your pizza (a dubious choice to begin with, but for the sake of argument let's grant it) you couldn't just let it melt without a care in the world. You'd just end up with an illegible cheeseblob.

Personally I'd just pick halloumi for the text and a dusting of parmesan for flavour instead of underbaking a a wet pizza, but everybody has got to make their own pie at the end of the day.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


Banach-Tarski pizzas notwithstanding, I have to ask

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

The benefit is fitting two pizzas on one pan op

WHICH PAN?!

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


Disregard convention, make Laoganmayonaise and serve it alongside pizza.

Yuck tax:



Sources online claim that that once was a pizza, but I'm not so sure.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020



Go a bit easier on the sauce, and don't be a lazy slob: Whether you fry them or poach them, cook your eggs separately.

Otherwise no notes.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020



It looks cold.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


PhazonLink posted:

i mean the square cube law means you cant get much bigger before the sheer mass of the food crushes itself and ruins the "normal" structure/form of the food. like im for being a structural rebel, but there has to be some iota of order

Cloudy with a chance of meatballs foods will never be a thing. unless theres magic or supa science.

Thankfully you can scale long foods (like a sub) in one dimension and flat foods (like pizza) in two dimensions as much as you bloody well like without incurring any structural problems (up until you try and pick it up without adequate utensils).

I do not want to imagine, much less experience a cubic pizza.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


I'd like to think that's all mustard.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


38-40oz of tinned sauces, tomato paste and baked beans. That's well over a liter of sauce. That's not a pizza, that's a drowning accident.

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


Nettle Soup posted:

You don't know that, it could be stabilised in the center with a big piece of wood.

What is this, a pizza for termites?

Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


There's definitely some veg that can acquire a little too much char for my tastes when it's sitting on top of the cheese.

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Griddle of Love
May 14, 2020


Dokapon Findom posted:

How is a pizza cutter supposed to cut this??? :confused:

Maybe you have to fashion the clam shells into an impromptu pizza cutter with your batter hands to prove yourself worthy desperate enough to eat that pizza.

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