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Update 69: Bang in The Middle of The Village Before we begin, a little bit of Adventure trivia:  If you manage to inflict Frozen on the Legendaries down here, when they hit the “move twice” part of the fight, the status effect prevents both moves and the game displays the ice graphic twice in a row. Neat! Anyway.   …Sonia's Theme - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST     If I’d known it was going to be this cold here, I would’ve thought things through a bit more… But here I am, stuck in the Crown Tundra, trying to learn more about a group of Pokémon. There are some Pokémon that prefer places where there are no people, you see……… Gloria?  You look… Stressed. Just a little bit, yes.… Okay, look. I’m renting a house in the village. Let’s head over there and I’ll put a pot on, yeah?…  … I mean, I KNOW I should’ve taken some time to do a little research, but when it comes to the sort of thing, I don’t always think it all through, you know? I just… I was talking with a friend of mine and he mentioned how his family had kicked him out for reasons pretty similar to what happened to us and I was kind of bored with that place anyway, so I figured, why not go down there and give them a piece of my mind?  Except they are gone. Hell, the plot of land’s lain fallow so long the forest’s started growing over it. And nobody seems to know what happened to them! It’s like the whole family up and left their clan behind. No word. Which just seems like them, doesn’t it? … And I don’t know that, do I? Look. I’ve always considered myself a Cameran, right? And like it or not, I come from among their ranks. So I at least… I want to have a connection to my past, I guess. But I want it to be on my own terms, you know? And for that matter, you know what I realized just after I walked into town? No? I know fuckall about actual Cameran history! I’ve been studying Galarian history as a Cameran and didn’t realize I’d managed to miss Cameran history specifically! I mean, not entirely, obviously, but all of my studies focused on the northern half of the island and I only learned about the southern half in relation to it. God, how embarrassing. And I blew most of my break tooling around on the Isle of Armour so I can’t even spend any time familiarizing myself with the land before I head back! I dunno… Have you talked with your mum about this yet? Or Marnie, for that matter… I… No I have not. Why HAVEN’T I? Both of them could at least help me get my head in order, and I didn’t think of them before heading out! Too impulsive for my own good sometimes… Call them. They can help you sort this out.  You’re an incredible friend, Sonia. If you need anything, absolutely anything, call on me and I’ll be there. That isn’t the first time you’ve promised that, Gloria! It’s still true  . Well, there is something I’ve been waiting on from you, you know.  Have you RSVPed for our wedding yet?… gently caress! Okay, I need to go do that now. Call them first! Email me the details again so I don’t forget them! See you later!… Wait, I was going to ask for her help with finding the – ah, bollocks.… Freezington - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST …… Of course, Mum. And no, I – I know. I understand, but even if YOU don’t, I’m still probably gonna hold on to that grudge.… Definitely. And nothing on this earth could stop me from coming to Hop’s birthday barbecue. All right, love you mum. And don’t forget to send those wool samples off to Marnie! All right, see you soon.…… Probably better off NOT finding them, honestly. Anyway, welcome to Freezington, according to this game the only settlement in Scotland. This village seems built to reflect the drain of young people from the countryside into the cities that characterizes most industrial and postindustrial nations – especially Japan. But from what I hear about the British Isles the same thing’s been going down for even longer. It isn’t run down or anything, the citizens are still hanging around like they do in any other Pokémon settlement, but every single one of them is visibly aged and most of their dialogue talks about how all the young people left long ago.  Not that this village doesn’t have anything to recommend it, though. While I wouldn’t say that Spheals are one of my favorite Pokémon, I will stand by them being one of the cutest. Just look at this thing   Could this be important??? … Probably best to get this over with.… Peony's Theme - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST   This poky little place will be our lodgings!  I know, I know. Not much of a base camp, is it? Still, we’ve got to give it a proper air of importance, haven’t we? Now, enough faffin’ about, Gloria! Let me tell you what the Peony Exploration Team is after! Round here, they’ve got a fair few strange and mysterious legends! FOR EXAMPLE!  A huge-headed Pokémon known as the King of Bountiful Harvests! NOT TO MENTION!... Wait, was that statue really made out of wood? How old even is it?  You’d think if it was old enough for the mayor to draw attention to it, then wood would have long since been worn away by the weight of the elements – wait, I think he’s finishing up.… But who knows? They say even Chansey meetings can lead to Blissey-ful friendships!  So here’s to a grand adventure, Expedition Chief Gloria! Wait, chief? Obviously! Look... What do you think would happen if the two of us went gallivantin’ off together? My dear Nia could come along for a grand, emotional reunion...and find this place empty!  So I’ll be the hold-down-the-fort chief! Which means you get the pleasure of bein’ the expedition chief! Gahaha!  Which brings me to...this! Go on—have it!…    I brought some spare uniforms so my dear Nia would have a few to change into. So there’s enough to give you one!… Well, it certainly is pretty warm. Gahaha, of course it is! Here—have these, too! They’re Legendary Clues I’ve meticulously compiled from hours of dedicated telly watchin’! Look, I’d love to help you with these – First off, why not have a look at that clue about the King of Bountiful Harvests? Seems like this king’s bonds with its loyal steed— or whatever you call it—run proper deep! So if I had to name this expedition, I’d call it…    Aha! I’ve just had an idea. Here’s a little somethin’ to help you out! Ah, the Master Ball, once a top-secret piece of technology hidden deep within a corrupt business’s R&D department, now something a retired Gym Leader gives to the child he shanghaied into helping him. This isn’t even the first Master Ball we’ve received this game – you can get one from Prof. Magnolia after beating Leon by visiting your house. Master Balls have 100% catch rates. No frills, no exceptions (except for Trainer Pokémon), you throw it at a Pokémon, you have it. Normally you only get one, but, Sword and Shield are easy games. Traditionally you either use them to catch the signature Legendary of your game, let them moulder in your inventory because what if you run into something you REALLY want to catch, or abuse glitches to get hundreds of them and waste them on Pidgies for laughs. I’ll be saving mine to test something out. If you ever get a bit turned around, come on back to base camp anytime! You can’t miss it—just look for the adventurin’- crew flag I stuck out front! Handmade by yours truly! Anyway, I suppose that’s that! Let the grand adventure begin! Have a smashin’ time out there!… Okay, let’s do THIS one and THEN tell him I need to leave in like three days… Also, I'm not going mining, I can get rid of the helmet...  Oi, listen here, Chief. I’ve got some wisdom to impart. … Good to know. Unfortunately, I went and left my favorite pillow back at home. So I went to have a look around town for…  C-come off it! You want me to hand over my ultra-mega-comfy pillow?! That’s askin’ a lot, even comin’ from you, Chief! Hm? What’s that? You think my pillow’s got somethin’ to do with a Legendary Pokémon? Gaaah, ultra-mega-seriously?! This is just some old thing I found! … Freezington - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST     Nice. That wood really IS tough, I wonder what it’s made… Of…???: Crow own…   
Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 21:19 on Jan 30, 2021 |
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Jan 30, 2021 21:05
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Hooo boy. I have many thoughts about the upcoming story. As I'm sure many others do. For now I will simply reiterate that Peony is great and I won't hear a word against his insane bad-joke-filled idiot self. The next few updates will also suggest a few reasons for him having several screws loose...
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Jan 30, 2021 21:39
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Falconier111 posted:
Black Robe posted:Hooo boy. I have many thoughts about the upcoming story. As I'm sure many others do. 
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Jan 30, 2021 22:42
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Black Robe posted:Hooo boy. I have many thoughts about the upcoming story. As I'm sure many others do. Oh yes, I will probably have more to say on this later. He's definitely a guy with hidden depths, though. Case in point, here's a thing that can happen in the Galarian Star Tournament (IIRC, Falconier, you said you weren't planning to cover this, so I thought it was fair game; if you want me to remove this let me know). It's a doubles tournament and, depending on which NPC partner you choose, this team might be awaiting you at the end: 
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Jan 30, 2021 23:48
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Explopyro posted:Oh yes, I will probably have more to say on this later. I won’t be covering any part of the Crown Tundra that isn’t related to Calyrex, the Star Tournament, or even the Battle Tower; feel free to discuss them as much as you want in the thread.
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Jan 31, 2021 00:24
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Fair enough. Don't think I really had much else to add, I just wanted to post that screenshot  That said, I do need to correct a mistake I made earlier (which unfortunately made it into one of your posts, you may want to edit that) - the shiny odds in Dynamax Adventures are apparently only 1/100 if you have the Shiny Charm, which you get by completing the Galar Pokedex. If you don't have that, it's 1/300. (Also, notably, the pokemon will not appear as shiny until the final screen where you get to choose which one to keep, so it's always worth double-checking them there.)
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Jan 31, 2021 03:33
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Jan 31, 2021 06:58
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I'm amazed they manage to stop laughing at each other's terrible dad jokes long enough to actually battle.
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Jan 31, 2021 08:36
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I just realized that I forgot to establish something in a previous post: not being Psychic-types, Zacian and Zamazenta don't communicate using psychic powers; instead, they  through the Galar radiation that gradually soaks into all residents of Galar over time in trace levels. This will be relevant in the next update. I'll be going back to add that into an earlier update, so until then, just pretend you read it already  E: It's at the start of Update 61 if you care to read it. Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 19:28 on Jan 31, 2021 |
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Jan 31, 2021 18:55
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Update 70: Some Sort Of Fairy-Tale Creature Fun fact one: Peonia can join you on Den battles in the Crown Tundra as well as Adventures. Fun fact two: if you run into a Legendary you already have during an Adventure, the game lets you fight it and then refuses to let you catch it, leaving you with whatever you’ve already caught. Fun fact three: if somebody’s connection shits itself, it kicks EVERYONE in the adventure back into single player and traps them with a bunch of AIs, basically screwing you out of your Legendary and penalizing you for restarting as if you’d bailed on real people. Fun fact four: nobody noticed the  I left in the last post.… Calyrex' Theme - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST  (Zamazenta, information request: Cameran Pokémon, large green head, looks like it’s wearing a crown, floats, associated with royalty and fertility.) (Sounds like Calyrex. I never encountered it myself, but I know it was active at least as far back as Artu’s reign. He exchanged messengers with its realm in Camer in his capacity as Gudelic, I’ve discussed how his title functioned before. It never ruled its lands directly, I know that much. It preferred to have its subjects make its decisions for it.) (I think I just spotted it. Do you think it’s still active?) (I would say it’s unlikely. The last I heard of it was during Alfred’s reign; he sent missionaries north to help the first real kings suppress of the land belief in it. By the time I served under the Brother Kings it had been largely forgotten. But then, was I not mythical as well?) (If that really is Calyrex, what should I expect?) (It had a reputation for… High-handed behavior. It was the sort of creature that saw most things as beneath it and took action to keep it that way. It was a god to its subjects, after all. It communicated by possessing human oracles.) (That’s… That’s great. Can I ask you to…) (Take me out of my Pokéball. I will stay out of sight, maintain our link, and wait for your orders.) (Thanks, mate. I’ll keep you posted.)   Battle! (Calyrex) - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST  This isn’t a terribly difficult fight, but then that’s standard at this point. I took the time to try and fight it with a few different Pokémon and learned that it has a substantial movelist – and yet, more than a third of the time, it uses a move that HEALS my Pokémon instead of damaging them. I did try to catch it, but…  … That proved impossible. Eventually I just took it down.  Oi oi, what’s up?! I heard a big ruckus comin’ from over here! What’s this now, Chief? Were you havin’ a Pokémon battle?... Huh? Please don’t antagonize the ancient divine king         That should be obvious, human child. I have borrowed this man’s body in order to thank you in person...so to speak. Okay, look. Can I ask you NOT to possess him? It’s a little… It makes you a little hard to trust. I’m afraid not. I require a vessel to speak with you and I’ve found no volunteers among the townsfolk. I have tried asking them myself, you understand. But they treated me like some sort of fairy-tale creature or flew into a mild panic at the sight of me. Without your assistance, I may have to go further afield. Perhaps I shall take this man with me? If I do, I shall need a permanent mouthpiece… (Okay, Zamazenta, on my mark.) (Of course, I shall a Aaugh gently caress! How remarkable, another Pokémon capable of forming a bond! It clearly lacks my experience, however. I would advise you to avoid using it in my presence.… What do you want?  … the land and give them plentiful harvests year after year. However, it seems that over many, many years, the people of this land have forgotten my existence. They used to make offerings to me every year, but even that tradition has long since been lost to the ravages of time. Without sufficient sacrifices, I lack the power I need to rejuvenate this land. By sacrifices, do you mean… Human? Are you a Continental savage? I require the residue that gathers around… Dens, I believe you call them, and the labor of my subjects. One can hardly expect me to dirty my hands with such mundane matters.… You’re looking for experience candy. I do not recognize that term. Allow me to go through this man’s mind…  … Ah, yes. How clever you humans are! But what I need from you now is simple. In days long past, I reigned over these lands as king. The humans offered me their loyalty and respect, as I was able to bring lush vegetation to the land and give them plentiful harvests year after year. And now I have lost all but a fraction of my former power. Even my loyal steed has abandoned me… However, you were kind enough to restore my statue! That act has returned some strength to me. Human child…  Report back to me with what you learned and, if your answers are satisfactory, I shall release this man unharmed.…So now we do exactly that.  The townsfolk have plenty of two-line responses to the topic ranging from It’s only the main tourist attraction of our lovely Freezington, after all! to I think it was called Calvin! Or was it Calista?. My personal favorite?  Once we’ve talk to everyone in town, we can confirm that, while they’ve all heard of it, none of them think it’s real.  We also pick up some seeds from this guy  .  It seems the people of this land have indeed forgotten the bond they once shared with me… How unfortunate. However, I have a solution. Once, I had a steed, a Pokémon I could channel my power through.  Without it, I am far less that I once was. With it… Perhaps the villagers know something about my... currently not-so-loyal steed. I would be in your debt if you could speak to the head of the village on my behalf. Locate it, and I shall find you once again. Until that time… Huh?! Chief?! With a massive noggin! Or... Wait. No, it’s normal. I must’ve fallen asleep where I stood! Sorry ’bout that, Chief! Guess I’ll head back to base and get some rest! ’Sides, it’s freezing out here! (Zamazenta, are you –) (I can feel Calyrex’s presence now, no doubt it’s listening in. As much as it pains me to say it, we should likely avoid speaking like this unless we need to.) (Understood. But…) (I am fine. It’s interference startled me, no more. Until it’s safe to speak again: Best of luck, Gloria. I have faith in you.)…  With that, the game once again cuts us loose. Asking around the town nets us a couple of important pieces of information:
 Time to head to a new area of the Tundra.   The Giant’s Bed. I loving hate the Giant’s Bed. Level design-wise, the place is a mess, all samey fields that wind at random, cutting off your view of any landmarks. It doesn’t hurt that the map just marks you as being in the dead center of the area no matter where you are in it, something it doesn’t always do. Just thinking about it makes me angry, so I’ll skip ahead to our destination: a set of low-lying ruins in the south-center of the Bed.   The Crown Tundra is scattered with ruins, many of which have pedestals to provide background information dumps. I’ll be avoiding them partly to avoid writing all that out and partly because the story they tell isn’t quite the story I’m telling, but mostly because Gloria doesn’t speak PokéEarly Scots.  Mayor: The soil is barren... No crop could possibly grow here now. Perhaps the lands of the Crown Tundra truly are beyond hope. No wonder our children move to the cities…  Sir, can I talk to you about the King of Bountiful Harvests? I have some questions about him, especially about his steed.Mayor: Why, of course! I’d be happy to tell you anything you want to know. But… Well, this is hardly the place for storytelling. Come to my home in Freezington. It’s better to have a nice chat in the warmth, after all! He tells us to visit his home when we’re ready and leaves us to explore. As if I’m going to spend a second more in this place than I have to. I immediately call a skytaxi rather than walk back. gently caress that. Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 04:35 on Feb 25, 2021 |
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Jan 31, 2021 23:17
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Poor Peony.
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Jan 31, 2021 23:59
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Yeah, that's my biggest gripe with this whole storyline, I can't stand the way Calyrex treats Peony (and the game plays it for humour, which is kind of gross). It's only downhill from here, too. I feel so sorry for him. I like that you're at least taking it seriously in your rewrite. (On a completely different note, in addition to finding Peonia and her Tyrantrum in random raid dens here, if you do raids on the Isle of Armour you can find Avery and his Slowbro. Or Klara and Slowbro in Sword. I've found they tend to be slightly better than most of the random NPCs, they have fully evolved pokemon and actually use attacking moves, while most of the others can only manage one of those reliably.)
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Feb 1, 2021 00:06
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Explopyro posted:Yeah, that's my biggest gripe with this whole storyline, I can't stand the way Calyrex treats Peony (and the game plays it for humour, which is kind of gross). It's only downhill from here, too. I feel so sorry for him. I like that you're at least taking it seriously in your rewrite. Quackles posted:Poor Peony.  On a less serious note, the encounter with the mayor here also had me rolling my eyes. That field is visibly not barren, it's very clearly full of plants. Either dig them out or plough them into the soil, and sow whatever it is you wanted to grow.
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Feb 1, 2021 06:00
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I just realized. Peony should definitely make an effort to catch a Galarian Peonyta.
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Feb 1, 2021 06:11
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Quackles posted:I just realized. And I traded away Sporkle  Black Robe posted:
I get the impression it’s declining soil quality instead of just not being able to grow anything. There’s a difference between “we can’t grow crops” and “our crops are all stunty and unhealthy”, you know? The villagers actually say as much, implying that harvests are still rolling in even as yields decline.
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Feb 1, 2021 21:45
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I can't recall what all they grow besides carrots, but it's possible they're not doing any nitrogen fixation, which would explain the declining yields. The wildlife in the area is also not really conducive to good fertilizer development. You've got ice types just outside the village, some of which are just animated ice and snow so don't poop. A little further away you've got Nidoran Central Station, and I can't imagine poison types producing good fertilizer. The lake is full of fossil pokemon, which actively sequester minerals in their stony bits. On the plus side, there is a plain full of fire types for ash, a cave full of Zubats for guano, and the water is also full of Magikarp. Magikarp that are one bad day away from Gyarados, but Magikarp nonetheless. There's also the fact that they're trying to farm a PSYDUCKING TUNDRA. You need divine intervention to do that. And also to not be so dumb you don't recognize the actual literal legendary pokemon that's on all your tourist brochures when it floats into your town.
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Feb 1, 2021 22:40
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Update 71: And Yet My Powers Could Only Get One To Grow Mayor: …become massive! That statue’s been broken since I was a child… Oh, of course! You wanted to learn about the loyal steed of the King of Bountiful Harvests! Well, I don’t know why you’d be interested in such things, but... Come, then. Follow me.  Mayor:… special vegetable… But my memory isn’t what it used to be. I can’t recall what exactly the steed so desired! I think it best that you search on the bookshelf over there if you want to find out any more.  Each of these options gives us a paragraph or so of flavor text, some more useful than others: ”The Reins of Unity” posted:Through these reins did the king send its power, in order to tame and control its proud steed. The reins, in fact, were made by the hands of the people, in thanks for the plenty brought by the king. These reins bound not only the horse and the king to one another—they bound the people to the king as well. At the dawning of each new year, we must never forget to gift the king with this offering. Let the radiant flower and the mane of the steed be woven together to bind us all in faith. Let the secrets of this sacred art be passed from parent to child to grandchild and never forgotten. ”Try the Freezington Snow Samba!” posted:Isn’t it tough dealing with the cold here on the tundra, with temperatures seeming to drop lower and lower with every passing year? While it’s tempting to stay indoors where it’s cozy, don’t forget to move that body, too! Try the Freezington Snow Samba today, and get your body moving to stay warm all winter! “Lift both hands in the air, wave here, wave there, bow low, touch your toe, and freeze! Then up we pop to start it all once more!” ♪ Form a circle with friends, and don’t be shy! The Snow Samba will keep you young at heart! Why is this even here?”Hardy Crops for the Tundra” posted:While carrots can be grown in the Crown Tundra, they have rather unusual growth habits. When grown beneath the heaped snow, these hardy roots tend to develop into Iceroot Carrots. When grown in tracts close to where many souls are laid to rest, Shaderoot Carrots will be your crop. Shaderoot Carrots are a favorite treat for many Ghost-type Pokémon, while Ice-type Pokémon seem to delight in eating Iceroot Carrots. According to old fairy tales, the steed that the King of Bountiful Harvests rode upon loved both of these varieties—or perhaps one or the other. Records seem to contradict one another, with some stories speaking of a white steed delighting in Iceroot Carrots and others mentioning a black steed devouring Shaderoot Carrots. ”The King’s Proud Steed” posted:The horse Pokémon gave over its power to serve the king and carry it hither and thither. The two even became one for a time, combining their strength to create a forest in a single night. This proud steed had been a wild thing once, ravaging the village crops and causing much woe. But the king, in all its greatness, brought this fierce creature to heel and secured its loyalty. And for each among us who claims the steed’s hide was black as the midnight gloom in which ghosts appear, there is another who claims it was white as a block of solid ice. None alive can now say which is the truth. What the hell is a horse? Whatever, it looks like this is all I’m going to get.   Hmmm? Oh, hey there, Chief! I had a feelin’ someone called me. Was it you? Peony, get out – Come now, human child, ‘tis unwise to interfere with your liege’s business. I’ll overlook that spurt of disloyalty if you promise never to repeat it, hmm? Okay… … Well? I, uh, it liked carrots? It has been so long since we rode together that I had completely forgotten… If we are able to find carrots somewhere, it should be but a trifle to lure my loyal steed back to me! If we could obtain even a single seed, I could grow a carrot from it myself. Human child, you may take carrot seeds from the villagers with my blessing. I bought some carrot seeds earlier, actually. Well done! Such initiative shall serve you well in my court. And yet... Hmm. The fields of the village simply won’t do. They’re not suited for growing carrots. Now...where might we find soil suited for growing these crops in this tundra of mine? One moment, I must form a temporary bond with you…   … And the bond is severed, as I can tell it discomfits you. I believe either of these sites shall suffice. As a token of my esteem, I will grant you your choice of which fields to plant the carrots in; when I return to power, those and the surround fields shall be yours, as well as serfs to tend them. I have business to attend to; I shall meet you at the field of your choice. *snort* Gah?! Gahaha! I guess it just goes to show that holdin’ down the fort isn’t all that easy! You take care o’ yourself, Chief. Don’t overdo it!… What am I DOING?… Child: Nan! Nanny!   Nan: Iceroot Carrots, cold as ice. ♪ Munched all up by the bully in white. ♪ Shaderoot Carrots, dark as doom. ♪ Crunched by the bully with a ghostly gloom. ♪ Now you make sure you eat your veggies too, just like the Pokémon in the song! Child: Yes, Nan! I bought the carrot seeds before I met Calyrex, so I missed a whole chunk of dialogue; if you don’t, you get to ask around the village about carrot raising. You learn that the soil in and around the village doesn’t support carrot growth very well, but that it used to be that any carrots they grew had either icy or ghostly characteristics. As you can probably guess from everything the game keeps telling you, which fields you choose determines the Type of the Pokémon you summon. Because I’m looking for a Ghost-type I choose the one in the Giant’s Bed, which happens to be right next to the place where we met the mayor earlier. After getting lost in the Bed and cursing my stupidity for 15 minutes…  Go ahead, human child. Bury them within the earth. Do not bother doing it properly; my power shall compensate for any mistakes on your part.     You planted so many seeds, and yet my powers could only get one to grow… And that having drained the land’s fertility as though it were a full crop… So much to do. By “drained the land’s fertility”, do you mean… Worry not. I can simply restore it when I visit again. Your future livelyhood is still assured.… Pluck the carrot from the earth. We shall need it soon enough. Now all I need are the Reins of Unity. They will amplify my power, letting me ride my loyal steed with ease. But I doubt I shall ever get another set from the humans in the village…   Predictable. Even after all these years, Spectrier cannot resist the odor of the local carrot… It is my belief that while my steed picked up on the scent of the carrot, it could not determine where the scent was coming from. Judging from the direction it ran off in, it must be headed to the village, in an attempt to pillage carrots there! If that is true, then Freezington is in danger! Human child, we must make haste! No true king abandons his subjects in their time of need – you must internalize this if you are to serve me!……     Battle! (Glastrier / Spectrier) - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST  Spectrier is no slouch, and it’s substantially stronger than Calyrex was. That Ghost typing doesn’t make things easier, since I have two Fighting-types on my team and lack any solid counters. I’ve never regretted switching out Mr. Blobby for some random Legendary more . Unfortunately, like Calyrex, we can’t catch it. Fortunately, it comes with a built-in disadvantage that reins in a lot of its damage potential. We can take it down with relative ease.        Well done, servant. But it wasn’t enough, I’m afraid. Were I at my full power, I could have tamed my steed and regained its loyalty… But weakened as I am now, the most I could do was influence its will and make it depart. I need my Reins restored; I know they require the hair of my steed and the craftsmanship of certain families among my subjects to function properly. Oh, and this:  Tragically, a full flower is beyond me for now. You should be able to make do, however. Take this and have the Reins constructed. I shall return to you when you complete the task.… Hey, Peony? Can I borrow the bedroom for second? And please don’t come in until I say you can, or there’ll be hell to pay. Gahaha, I live with Peonia! I know better than THAT! Close the door… Zamazenta, you’re out. Can you transform…? Of course. But I doubt we have much time before Calyrex gets curious. I don’t even know what I’m DOING! I just… It throws me so off balance I can’t focus anymore. I keep fixating on what it’s doing to Peony! And-and what if it does it to me? And if it can do all this at its weakest, could it control a city once it’s restored? The Region? This is so far above my pay grade. You’re – Yes, I KNOW I’m the Champion, but, nothing scares me more than having control taken away from me and I’m loving TERRIFIED! Listen for a moment, Gloria.… Okay. Neither of us know exactly what Calyrex can do, but we do know it has been defeated in the past. It is not invincible.… Gloria, one of your greatest strengths is how by nature you see the oddities in the little narratives that other people follow, whether in battle or when delivering insults. I do that a lot, don’t I? Calyrex is a creature that lives by its narratives. You won’t be able to puncture its arrogance, but you can watch for its weaknesses and capitalize on them.… You’re right. And… And I think I have a plan.
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Feb 2, 2021 03:39
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Calyrex, you leave my new adopted dad alone 
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Feb 2, 2021 15:20
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One of the very rare times we have a pokemon that can communicate with humans, and it's this rear end in a top hat.
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Feb 2, 2021 16:51
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I love how you've turned Calyrex into a complete rear end in a top hat when the game's narrative is instead trying to push a "pity the poor legendary who's lost his power" angle.
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Feb 2, 2021 21:16
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BlazetheInferno posted:I love how you've turned Calyrex into a complete rear end in a top hat when the game's narrative is instead trying to push a "pity the poor legendary who's lost his power" angle. Any character that makes use of mind control, even relatively benign mind control like Calyrex, is an instant villain in my books.
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Feb 2, 2021 21:47
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At least Peony just thinks he fell asleep. The locked-in prisoner in your own head, helpless to do anything but watch what's done using your body, is like 5000% worse on the mind control front. But even just in the canon story, Calyrex is a thinly-veiled rear end in a top hat. He's not vengeful, but he does have a very egocentric worldview and alien morality.
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Feb 2, 2021 23:08
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Update 72: I Have Been Waiting, Human Child Do you know if there’s anyone in the village who can make the Reins of Unity? Mayor: If my dear great-granddad were still around, he’d have been able to make you a set... But unfortunately, we’ve no one left who knows the traditional ways at this point. What’s more, I doubt you have the flower you’d need to forge a set of the reins. I have this. Mayor: If so, would that not mean the King of Bountiful Harvests has truly...? No, no! I dare not hope. …Mayor: If I recall, my ancestors made Reins of Unity by following the ways passed down in fairy tales... There were two key materials—a flower and hairs from a Pokémon. But I’m afraid those old traditions have long since faded from memory. Still, how could I refuse a favor to such a kind and helpful guest? The materials, if you please! I can’t promise this will turn out as well as the ones my great-granddad would’ve made, but...    Mayor: I fancy myself a crafty enough sort, but I suppose it’d take a craftsman of truly delicate technique to make such fine reins. Mayor: Oh, please don’t look so dejected. I’m very sorry. Truly I am.   … What? Is that all? Gahaaahaha! So, all you need to do is make some nice cord! Pass me those materials for a mo. All right! Got my petal, got my hair! Now what’m I supposed to do with ’em?Mayor: *ahem* If I may be so bold, allow me to share a song that survives from the legends... … All finished! Have a look! Think this’ll do?   Mayor: It seems you’ve got the Reins of Unity you need. Isn’t that just smashing! …  I was chilled to the bone, so I thought I’d warm myself up with a good, hot shower at our base. But the water comin’ out was ice cold! I got ultra-mega-surprised and jumped out without putting on any of my—  The reins are complete, my liege. Most excellent! Keep them for now. I have some good news of my own. I was finally able to track down my loyal steed! Spectrier is making its home in the Crown Shrine! It was the seat of my power at the height of my rule and a fitting place to restore it. No doubt it remembers its servitude. The Crown Shrine stands majestically atop the mountain to the north.  … It’s time .… We have a long way to go from the places we’ve been to the Shrine.  We’re talking ruins…  … Birch forests…  … Tunnels…  … Scenic views…  … And lots of stairs before we reach our destination. Crown Shrine - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST       …Place its own dwelling. The reins. Oh, how this brings back memories... Now, human child, in order to lure my loyal steed to me...  Of course, my lord. The trap is set. You have already proved your superiority to it, human child, and so it shall do everything it can to avoid you. Oh, but there is another matter: servant, what should I do with this vessel? It will serve no useful purpose once I am fully restored. I advise you release him to his previous life, as a gesture of mercy and generosity to your new subjects. Very well. I shall send him down the mountain to rest in his bed. He will awake none the wiser. Now come. We must conceal ourselves until the time is right.… Calyrex' Steed Appears - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST               Human child! Thanks to your efforts, I have been reunited with my loyal steed. I have the power of mortal speech once more! What a relief, not to soil myself with an intermediary like I once did. I was convinced that the people no longer believed in me... And I had also lost my loyal steed... I was trapped in the throes of deep loneliness. There are truly no words with which to fully express my gratitude to you. But actions… Actions are another matter entirely.  Battle! (Mounted Calyrex) - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST I believe it is time for your reward! You have served me loyally to this point and earned yourself a position at my court – at my side. Come, my knight! You will not merely receive land and title: it is time we formed a bond –  (…Zamazenta? Can you tell if it’s…?) (I could feel the Galar radiation flooding out of it whenever it entered our presence, but I feel nothing now. I believe that it has been contained.) (Oh thank God…)Something beeps.  I just had a dream about a bigheaded Pokémon, talkin’ on and on in a weird shrine... I just remembered I had a dream a while back about a strange bigheaded Pokémon. It was jabberin’ away at this weird shrine! You were there, too, Chief! It all felt so real! I got worried about you and decided I’d better give you a call and check in! Ah, good to hear! Guess I got nothin’ to worry about, then! Gahahaaa! The Peony Exploration Team is all about the safety and well-bein’ of its members, after all! So you be careful on your way back, too, you hear? No expedition’s over until you’re safe and sound back at home base!… The Isle of Armor - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST  (… The ship until it’s halfway to Unova, then surreptitiously drop the ball off the side. From what Sonia’s told me, it’s highly unlikely tidal action will ever uncover it. If you aren’t willing to have me destroy it, that is the safest way to dispose of it.) (As horrible as Calyrex is, I’m no fan of condemning it to the bottom of the ocean forever.) (That is your best option. Every moment it stays with you you risk it breaking free and trying to take your mind. Can you truly say you have a better option?)…quote:
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… Rotomphone, call Sonia.… Do you still have that Galar radiation containment room I heard you talking about, oh, months ago, now?… Can you get it operational by, like, tomorrow morning? I – I know this is a really big ask, but it’s important. Look. I just got my hands on a Pokémon. Something potentially revolutionary – it’s a sapient Pokémon. It can talk! And, you know, scheme…
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Feb 3, 2021 04:00
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Why would you even want me? I hurt people and break things. It’s kind of my only thing.
Go.
Life imprisonment and a devastated reputation await us.
Why put it off?
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Just make sure to separate it from Spectrier before you do anything to it - I support chucking it in the ocean myself. Poor horse just wanted a nice snack. And it's a phouka! Those are cool. I don't know why Gamefreak decided to finally make a non-anime-canon talking Pokemon and I don't know why they thought the best way to showcase it would be to have it continually possess and mindfuck a random nice human and then make you complicit in chaining and enslaving another Pokemon. It's the kind of thing you'd expect in a fangame but it doesn't fit anything in the existing game franchise and doesn't even have the decency to have a 'learning the error of its ways' redemption arc like movieverse Mewtwo. On a more minor note, why is the 'King of Bountiful Harvests' not remotely related to plants or harvests in any way? Yeah, it's part grass, but nothing in its design says so, and while it does have a bunch of grass moves it just doesn't give off that kind of vibe. Shaymin, you look at and immediately know it's about growing things, and its associated magic flower is part of its design. This is... a weird ghost hare puppet with a silly balloon hat.
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Feb 3, 2021 09:13
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The hat is probably supposed to be a bud or fruit of some kind. But yeah, still kind of an uninspiring design.
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Feb 3, 2021 10:25
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It's not even grass type. It might be in the solo fight, but the one you actually catch is Psychic. Honestly I would have much preferred it if I could have caught them separately.
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Feb 3, 2021 11:26
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it's design reminds me of a cotton boll that's starting to open. But yes, it had a heavy fangame vibe. It'd be less fucky if it asked Peony permission to speak through him first and didn't just leave him loving unconscious in the snow when it's done.
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Feb 3, 2021 16:49
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Dareon posted:It's not even grass type. It might be in the solo fight, but the one you actually catch is Psychic. Honestly I would have much preferred it if I could have caught them separately. In fairness, for grass/ghost we have the Trevenant line and grass/ice we have the Abomasnow line, but for psychic/ice we have the awkward-to-obtain Froslas and the Mr. Rime line and for psychic/ghost we only have legendaries. Plus, you can divide them and use them separately. I don’t think they ever explain that, though. What ABOUT Jynx?  Robindaybird posted:it's design reminds me of a cotton boll that's starting to open. I am almost certain the only symbolism behind its head is that it looks like a crown. Same reason why its cape in its fused form has an ermine fringe. It doesn’t help its case that the dialogue implies Calyrex’s possession leaves some kind of permanent mark on him; canonically Peony was present when Calyrex fused and he went “oh no, not again” when it possessed him for the last time. That can’t mean anything good.
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Feb 3, 2021 17:20
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its head is a bud (Calyx; its japanese name is literally Budrex but they made it fancy in english) but it's also supposed to look like a crown. And it does have power to grow plants and is still grass type if you take it off the horse (though it's a lot weaker then). It also has the power to grow other things - unlike every other pokemon that can dynamax, who have a pink-red aura, when Calyrex dynamaxes it has a blue aura because it's using its own power for it and not borrowing ambient galar radiation.
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Feb 3, 2021 19:11
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Falconier111 posted:
yeah, there's so many ways it could've been written to make it less hosed up, but they didn't and it gets played off as a joke at Peony's expense.
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Feb 3, 2021 21:06
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Update 73: Welcome to the Wonderful World of Pokémon! The next afternoon…  He’s on his way! And he brought a friend of ours, be nice.Hop’s Dad: Another one? Are we sure we have enough food? Hop’s Mum: We raised him and Leon, of course we have enough food – Sshh! … That I will be welcome there? Mate, they’re all good people. Nobody’s going to judge you. Get ready. Plus, Gloria is there, and I bet she’d jump in to help you if anything happened. You know her better than I do. Though… I suppose you must be –            SURPRISE!! Hi  . I, ah, I was advised that this would be a small gathering. It usually is, but we decided to change it up this year. Did you plan this? Of course I didn’t. Opal did. Now go greet your fans. Avery! Y-yes? Hop’s probably going to be underwater for a little while and I doubt you’d be comfortable just standing in a corner – I wouldn’t – so I have to introduce you to someone I think you’d get along with. Let’s find wherever Bede is hiding and go bother him…… Three hours later… Oh, THERE you are… How you feelin’? I’ve been flaggin’ for a while, honestly… You think we can leave? Absolutely, I just saw Piers and Sonia call a skytaxi and Leon and Raihan are doing their weird rival-flirting thing again, which means they’re probably going to knock off themselves soon.… Can we go to your house? I’ve never been… Don’t worry about it. As long as we don’t, you know, DO anything, Mum’s probably not going to mind you staying over. If you want to, you can go over there and ask her… Is she… Is she chatting up Milo? I’m too knackered to read facial expressions now, you tell me That isn’t the sort of thing I want to think too hard about. Let’s get outta here.…  … C’mon in. I’d give you a more thorough tour, but after three hours of social interaction…… We could both stand to get off our feet right away. But… I’m too wired to sleep yet, you know? How about we just watch somethin' on the telly for a bit? Oh! Oh, take a seat, I have just the thing.Pokemon Sword & Shield - Title Screen Music    The quality’s awful low, innit? Welcome, one and all! Ah, that’d be why. Hey, he may be in jail now, but this was playing when Hop called me over to his house to get Bruce. I was kinda distracted by my phone at the time and wasn’t really paying attention, and I’m feeling a little nostalgic, you know? And those of us who choose to raise and train Pokémon to do battle and compete… we call Pokémon Trainers! Oh! But I’m getting carried away. Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Rose, and it is a pleasure to be here. Now turn your gaze to the Galar region’s greatest Pokémon Trainer, your undefeated Champion… it’s time for Champion Leon’s exhibition match!… Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 05:26 on Feb 4, 2021 |
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Feb 4, 2021 05:02
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AND THE MAIN NARRATIVE IS MOTHERFUCKING DONE  I'll probably go back over this later to make sure this post isn't terrible, and I still have a couple posts of commentary and narrative wrapup to do, but... this LP is by an order of magnitude the largest thing I've ever written. I'm kinda spent .E: nowhere better than the last post to catch an error you made in the first post lol Falconier111 fucked around with this message at 05:24 on Feb 4, 2021 |
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Feb 4, 2021 05:05
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Good show bringing it full circle!
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Feb 4, 2021 06:53
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Well hey, thanks for that. It's been a ride, and you gave us a story better than the game itself did. As someone with two abandoned LPs to their name, I'd say you can be proud of what you accomplished.
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Feb 4, 2021 06:54
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Well played! Well done! Huzzah! Where's a flock of Wooloo to ring out the credits when you need 'em
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Feb 4, 2021 09:17
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This was great, you should feel drat proud.
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Feb 4, 2021 09:39
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This was great, thanks a lot. 
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Feb 4, 2021 11:51
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I do appreciate the applause, but we’re not done yet! We’ve got like two posts to go.
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Feb 4, 2021 13:17
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Congratulations! This was certainly a journey, and I've thoroughly enjoyed sharing it with you.
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Feb 4, 2021 14:25
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I've been silently reading along all this while and I got to say, you've done dang good in my books, I'm definitely gonna read along with whatever you do in the future as well.
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Feb 4, 2021 18:30
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