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TheKub posted:I take a slightly different approach to meditation than the cross-legged silent breath counting. I feel like I meditate for just a moment here, a moment there. I'll take a big breath and just relax my body and just take in all my senses, mindfully experiencing moments through the day. Not to keep harping on about Waking Up, but it's my main reference, so... Harris encourages exactly what you describe. Often during a guided meditation he will say to try and foster moments of mindfulness during the rest of the day, especially when changing from one activity to another. I think the idea is that the guided part serves as useful base practice for training your brain to be mindful, but that the benefits are far greater if you try and do it often, even if just for short bursts - it will better suffuse your thinking and attitude to life and bring more psychological relief if you're doing it often, though the guided sessions are without doubt potent and beneficial. I will say though in respect to your very last line that I find that it really doesn't work when I'm stoned. Also not so much when I'm lying down, though I still sometimes try and do at night in bed if my brain is all over the place.
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Jun 7, 2023 15:25
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I've meditated for at least 2 hours every day for 35 years. I started the practice when I began martial arts, thanks to my first instructor. I do one hour twice a day, or sometimes a single two hour sit. My wife and all 5 of our kids sit as well, though the youngest aren't as consistent and that's okay. My older kids do it without any prompting. It's cool to spot them sitting quietly somewhere, all on their own. The pro fighters I coach know they are expected to sit at least an hour a day. If they have a bout, we sit together for 2 hours that morning, and for one hour after the fight win or lose. Even with all my experience, I still get anxious about Life, and that's okay. Sometimes it's hard to sit when things go off the rails, but I just remind myself that it ain't nothin' a little breathing won't make better. Thoughts aren't anything but; it's our reaction to and investment in them that cause problems. If you're stuck on "I can't clear my head!", you're approaching it the wrong way, imo. Trying to empty your mind is futile; our brains don't like a vacuum. It's better to treat meditation like any exercise- one breath, one acknowledgement is a single rep. You don't stop a dumbell curl halfway through the motion, so don't try to stop your mind from thinking. Just notice the thought and move on. For racing thoughts, I like to treat each thought as a balloon. I observe it for what it is then let it float away. Or I think of myself sitting in the median of a busy highway, and treat intrusive thoughts as cars passing by. After a while, the traffic stops. Don't judge your thoughts or your session. That's the key. Nowadays I don't use any mantras or focus my attention on an object or a sound, though I have before*. I just sit and simply exist from one moment to the next, not judging the merits of each. Neither good or bad, each moment just is, and they are equally divine and appreciated. * usually during my evening session, one of our cats sits right in front of me and grooms himself. I'll watch him as he does and that adds a little something special 
isaboo fucked around with this message at 21:28 on Jul 1, 2023 |
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Jul 1, 2023 21:08
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Impressive that you've kept up that routine with kids. I've been struggling since the second little one was born a few months ago. Time and sleep is very limited, it seems. I need to jump start it again one way or another.
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Jul 2, 2023 04:58
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Yeah, there have certainly been lapses in my practice because of the kids and other distractions. That's half of the trick, isn't it? To find the time, with the other half being able to sit while things are stressful. It's easy to do when things are good, but another thing altogether when poo poo Is Going Down. That's when you'll find the most benefit, in my experience. It'll take time to get to that point, but it will come if you're diligent. I've seen my wife sit stone cold and calm while any number of kids scream in her face for something. Even 30 seconds can make a difference. Hell, it usually calms the kids down too since they see that Mom is unflappable in that moment. I got really good at it when I used to commute through Atlanta, LA, and other places like those. Stuck in a car and can't move for 5-10 minutes and you're stressed about all the morons around you actively trying to kill you? That's the perfect time to practice while under duress! Conversely if you're somewhere that you're waiting for something to happen - on public transit, sitting in a waiting room, or just waiting in line to check out at the store - take 2 minutes to breathe. It may sound cliche, but 'wherever you go, there you are'. You just have to remember that the you is not the thoughts banging around in your head at any given moment, and take the time to connect with your body/breath/external world however you can. The worst thing you can do though is think "shut the gently caress up, brain!!!" That's a surefire way to encourage the unwanted chatter to intensify. There may be a proper term for it, but another technique I've used is the '3 senses method''. Pick something to visually focus on for a minute, then a sound, then something you can touch. e: lol, I guess the video above said the same thing only much simpler - 'anywhere, anytime' isaboo fucked around with this message at 16:26 on Jul 2, 2023 |
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Jul 2, 2023 16:04
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isaboo posted:Yeah, there have certainly been lapses in my practice because of the kids and other distractions. That's half of the trick, isn't it? To find the time, with the other half being able to sit while things are stressful. It's easy to do when things are good, but another thing altogether when poo poo Is Going Down. That's when you'll find the most benefit, in my experience. It'll take time to get to that point, but it will come if you're diligent. I've seen my wife sit stone cold and calm while any number of kids scream in her face for something. Even 30 seconds can make a difference. Hell, it usually calms the kids down too since they see that Mom is unflappable in that moment. Thanks for the advice. Going to see if I can put it in practice today while the baby sleeps on me.
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Jul 3, 2023 18:42
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Does anyone have perspectives on the appropriate age to teach kids meditation? What about the ethics of requiring a kid to try to meditate (or at least sit) if they don’t want to - should they be completely free to decline with no resistance, or is it more analogous to “eating your vegetables”?
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Jul 16, 2023 16:23
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Halisnacks posted:Does anyone have perspectives on the appropriate age to teach kids meditation? What about the ethics of requiring a kid to try to meditate (or at least sit) if they don’t want to - should they be completely free to decline with no resistance, or is it more analogous to “eating your vegetables”? I started teaching my kids at around age 10. We tried a little earlier - around 8 I think - but no matter how we explained it to them, they viewed it as punishment. We didn't push it and if they declined, we'd accept that and just tried to be good role models and showed them that we enjoyed doing it ourselves. They eventually saw sitting wasn't used for discipline. Also, I have 5 kids and by the time the youngest had seen the older kids do it for a while that helped them realize it was a cool and normal thing to do. Setting was important, too. Instead of telling them to 'go sit in your room', we'd take them outside during sunset. Or we'd go to the barn and sit with the animals for a while then start breathing exercises. My youngest are now 11 and have been doing it fairly consistently - 4 or 5 times a week - for probably 3 months or so. Ten or fifteen minutes twice per day is their limit at the moment, though. We encourage them to do it before school and before any after school activities but if they're around other kids they wait until they're home. Most people in our unfortunately conservative area think we're the weird hippy family but we're also where all the younguns want to hang out. There's always a billion local kids running around and playing on our farm, and even a couple of them have tried it.
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Jul 16, 2023 17:51
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Little Jones meditates with me sometimes. He doesn’t love it, but he likes making me happy and sometimes we’ll meditate in bed or on the couch cuddling, which he loves. He always enjoys it when he does it, but it’s hard to get him to stop whatever he’s up to. usually I just say that I’m going to meditate and his desire to hang out with me wins out over his desire to keep drawing or whatever He’s 7
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Jul 25, 2023 02:55
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Don’t overthink it though. It’s ok to make kids do stuff they dont want to do, especially if it’s just giving it a try. I wouldn’t force them to do it if they hate it - that’d be very counterproductive- but kids aren’t great at doing what’s good for them. That’s what makes them children. Don’t tie yourself in knots convincing yourself it’s unethical to parent (obviously, also don’t be a butt to your kids, though)
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Jul 25, 2023 02:58
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isaboo posted:It may sound cliche, but 'wherever you go, there you are'. You just have to remember that the you is not the thoughts banging around in your head at any given moment, and take the time to connect with your body/breath/external world however you can. The worst thing you can do though is think "shut the gently caress up, brain!!!" That's a surefire way to encourage the unwanted chatter to intensify. This is the part I can't understand. That is the purpose of meditation, for me. That's why I'm in this thread right now, because I need a way for my brain to shut the gently caress up before I resort to regularly medicating myself. I can pretend that's not the case I guess. But it still is. It just seems like a contradiction to me, you're doing this to calm your mind but also not trying to do that.
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Aug 29, 2023 18:26
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Ramrod Hotshot posted:This is the part I can't understand. That is the purpose of meditation, for me. That's why I'm in this thread right now, because I need a way for my brain to shut the gently caress up before I resort to regularly medicating myself. I can pretend that's not the case I guess. But it still is. It just seems like a contradiction to me, you're doing this to calm your mind but also not trying to do that. It's like you have a mosquito bite. Thinking to yourself "don't scratch the bite" will just make you more likely to scratch the bite and make it worse. You've got to find something else to do to take your mind off it. Count your breaths is a most basic and easy way to separate yourself from whatever it is that is bothering you, be it a mosquito bite or a troubling thought or an uncomfortable feeling. You might only get a breath or two in before your mind is back on the trouble, but you just have to try again. Breath in, breath out. Breath in , breath out.
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Aug 29, 2023 19:28
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Another thing is (if we keep the mosquito bite comparison) that if you recognize your skin itches from the mosquito bite and you just let yourself go through the feeling without judging it or thinking "this is irritating" but instead experiencing it makes it pass much more easily.
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Aug 29, 2023 19:48
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So is this practise comparable to setting up and running a virtual machine on my Linux desktop as opposed to start programmes directly in an older Windows version without Data Execution Prevention (DEP), a system-level memory protection feature? Everything is monitored and northing directly affects me anymore, once I established the awareness filter. I don't mean to offend, just trying to understand meditation better.
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Sep 9, 2023 21:31
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anything is comparable to anything else if you try hard enough
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Sep 9, 2023 22:57
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I’m glad to find this thread, I really need to start meditating. Stress, sadness, and adhd have been getting to me lately and I’m not good enough at dealing with it all on my own. I started seeing a therapist who recommended a video with Mingyur Rinpoche who I already see mentioned a few times itt. I just finished the video a few minutes ago. I liked the part where he talked about meditating to sound, that’s probably where I need to start. My own music is droney and meditative- it can be pretty harsh, but I think I come close to meditating while I fade in and out of drone layers. Growing up I’d occasionally go to Quaker meeting with my dad, I think that gave me an early respect for meditative states, especially the power of meditation with groups. I’m hoping I can find something like that again. Looking forward to exploring some of the links already posted, it makes me optimistic 
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Oct 17, 2023 03:13
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It’s not double posting if it’s three months later right?  I’ve been using the Waking Up app for the last two months and I think it’s been fairly helpful so far. OneSizeFitsAll described the approach well, it feels very straightforward and accessible. Now that I’m done with the beginners course and moving on the the daily meditations I’m wondering if any of you that use Waking Up can recommend any of the theory series as being especially good for beginners. I’ve been considering just starting the beginners course over again to keep improving the basics.
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Jan 8, 2024 04:14
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I have developed a new meditation system: The Sniper Normally of course you have to stop breathing to stabilize a rifle. But you don't just stop breathing. As you breathe out, you instantly stop and try to convulse your diaphragm. Stop convulsing your diaphragm when you are done, and do it again.
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Jan 9, 2024 12:58
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On the advice of my employee assistance program, I just did a meditation of sitting in my chair and counting my breaths. I could feel the blood draining from my face and I nearly fell asleep, but I feel a lot more relaxed. I think I need to make this a regular thing.
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Feb 15, 2024 15:13
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