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I hit pause on my wired controller for the SNES Mini replica of the original SNES Mini that I'd picked up at a popup GameStop revival store and looked over at my naked IvankaBot. "I'm getting bored of MarioKart. Want to gently caress?" As if it was a question. My IvankaBot smiled sexily at me and began walking toward the bedroom. I pulled off my cosplay Kingdom Hearts cargo shorts, nearly tripping on the straps as I made my way toward my Kitt shaped bed. I paused in the doorway, my erect penis bobbing up and down excitedly like a McDonaldland Frykid, and said, "I sleep in a racing car, do you?" "I sleep in a big bed with my huge dicked owner," replied the IvankaBot. We laughed together, as I had trained her to do, and then I sauntered over to thrust my throbbing manhood into her pleasure receptacle. "Me love you long time," from the classic film Apocalypse now, emanated from her sweet lips. I laid down next to the IvankaBot after several moments of passion and turned toward her, "Do you know Scott Pruitt?" "No, tell me more," she replied. "He was Trump's first head of the EPA. Really weird guy. Built a silence bubble in his office, got ran out on corruption. He even tried to get a free used mattress from one of Trump's hotels. And this mattress?" I paused so the IvankaBot could look down and take in the sheetless mattress. The pause was for me and my amusement; an IvankaBot has enough processing power to watch back to back marathons of Lord of the Rings followed by Planet of the Apes and all its sequels in a microsecond. "This mattress is a perfect replica of Pruitt's." "That's impressive," replied the IvankaBot. I told her about how I'd picked it up at a popup revival of a Spencer's Gifts run by some Trumpheads. She stared at me, expressing interest as I told her how I had managed to snag the last of a limited 10 edition run. "Do you know how they explained how Scrooge McDuck was part of the Klondike gold rush but still alive and only visibly 60+ in the 2010's in the Ducktale's reboot?" "No, tell me more," she replied. The perfect woman. cumshitter fucked around with this message at 04:27 on Nov 25, 2020 |
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Nov 25, 2020 03:48
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| # ¿ May 21, 2024 18:27 |
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I paused, watching the mechanical arm pull a plastic capsule from the Vending Machine Vending Machine. A clear ball with a yellow top lazily bounced down into the receptacle. I opened it eagerly with a small pop, pausing to admire the shiny thin plastic and the brief smell of prepackaged air wafting toward my nostrils. It contained a 60's Coca-Cola vending machine. A miniaturized perfect replica of the one from the iconic scene in Doctor Strangelove. "I'm sorry, you were saying?" "Sir, I'm warning you: you will face severe repercussions from Warner Brothers. They will not be happy about this." We had planned an in-game gathering where everyone's avatars would come together to sing the Happy Birthday song. The real one, not one of the multitude of legally distinct versions from a Bennigan's or Chile's revival restaurant. I had planned to dress my avatar like the Lyle Lanley version of the music man from The Music Man as we rode around on a perfect recreation of the monorail from Marge Vs. The Monorail. "I don't care what Warner Brothers thinks. Don't you see what this is about? That song belongs to the people. Two. Hundred. Years. That's how long they've owned it. That song belongs in the free market place. You're the lawyer, you make it work." "I didn't want to have to do this..." Sam pulled out a business card. Bone white, just like from American Psycho. That's why I liked Sam. Works on contingency? No, money down! "You'll have your money, Sam. That's not the issue here. We're fighting for something bigger." cumshitter fucked around with this message at 08:31 on Nov 25, 2020 |
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Nov 25, 2020 08:02
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It's honestly difficult to try and fit in as many pop culture references as possible. Like, you have to be a person who thinks in brand logos, speaks in catch phrases, and only views social interactions as reenactments of scenes from Seinfeld or something in order to write like that. The author of Ready Player One must be the most insufferable person in the world.
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Nov 25, 2020 08:51
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