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go go ogogo!
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Jan 19, 2021 18:43
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 17:13 |
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*ahem* UP THE FUCKIN' WELLS, LADS!
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Jan 19, 2021 18:53
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Go Go Ogogo! Up the Wells! A phenomenal performance in all respects.
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Jan 19, 2021 19:02
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Workshopping a little something for the terraces STOP, STOP OGOGO YOU CAN'T STOP OGOGO, GO!
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Jan 19, 2021 19:31
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Ogogoal, many people are saying
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Jan 19, 2021 19:37
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Ogogo a-go-go, baby!
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Jan 19, 2021 19:43
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The Fat Man's Golf Course - 9:03am It was the morning after our win against Beckenham Town and I was back at my regular job. I’d just cut the first four greens on the course, getting at them early so there wouldn’t be a difference hole-to-hole when we had some golfers out. I was emptying out the bucket from the few snippings of grass when Teddy came speeding up to me on his fairway cutter. Seeing that thing bearing down on you is absolutely terrifying. It goes up to 35 miles per hour, and the whole front of it is a series of blades and rotators that’d have a limb of if you happened to fall before it. Pulling up to me Teddy yelled, “Mrrrummpf ver ump fer umpf!” “I can’t hear you, Teddy,” I said, but he couldn’t hear me, so I shouted louder. “Teddy! I can’t loving hear you with the machine!” He turned it off. “I couldn’t hear you with the mower,” he said. “What’s wrong?” I asked. “Some lad is in the hut looking fierce shook. He’s asking for ‘the boss,’ but when I told him Mr. Laws wasn’t around he said, ‘the real boss.’ You.” “What does he look like?” I asked. “Like he’s been slapped with wet newspaper,” Teddy said. “Alright, I’ll head into him, probably one of the players who’s been benched.” “Good job on the win last night, by the way. I’m keeping cut outs of yer sports page articles. I’ll do last night’s at lunch.” Then he speeded off on the mower he regularly told me cost more than his car. Walking up to the hut I was thinking it’d be some lad who’d joined in on the festivities last night, in The Sheep’s Head. They’d be high on a win but when the nerves kicked in this morning with the alcohol leaving them they’d remember they hadn’t actually played, were celebrating something they weren’t part of, and their whole small and new footballing world would have collapsed. I was gearing up to tell a lad it was a squad game. That what everyone did on the training grounds contributed, it was going to be a long season and no matter who you were you had a part to play, when stepping into our hut I saw Louis Ogogo, sitting, with his hands shaking, while holding a mug of tea. “There sugar in that?” I asked him, pointing at the mug. “I don’t take sugar,” he said. “I don’t even really drink tea. That guy in here made it for me.” Teddy was not the kind to make strangers cups of tea, so Louis must have looked even worse before he had a mug to hold. “You’ll probably need a few spoons, with your hands, eh, like that. Low glucose, strains of the game, morning after and electrolytes and all that,” I said, even though I could see it was one hundred percent nerves. I poured one, then two, then a third spoon’s heaping of sugar into his tea, stirred it up and said, “Get that into you, lad.” He took a sip, and I could almost see the heat venturing down his throat, spread around his chest, and the sugar work its magic to give him a little boost of happy chemicals. “What’s bothering you?” I asked. “Too much celebration last night?” “The celebrations were fine,” Louis said. “It was just us and some of the staff. Maria has some filthy jokes, you know? I’m not even old enough to drink but Mr. Laws didn’t seem to mind me being there. It was all good until this morning.” “What happened this morning?” I asked. I was expecting him to mention the inevitable low after the highs of the match the previous night but what he said, at first, surprised. “Mum sent me to the shops to get a loaf of bread, and some kids yelled at me.”  Louis Ogogo’s big worried head, sitting in my hut on the golf course, obviously bothered. “OK...” I said, not really getting it. “And so did some builders, working on Mrs. Johnson’s cladding.” “Hmmm, terrible,” I said. His hands were still shaking. Louis took a deep breath through his nose as he spoke up again. “I didn’t know what to make of all that, Mrs. Johnson’s Susan used to babysit me.” “Right...” I said, as punctuation to his stream of consciousness. “But when I was walking into Tesco Express, some granny, with one of those Tartan shopping trolleys they pull behind them, you know the ones?” I just looked blankly at the young lad, obviously perturbed. “She must have been a hundred, ancient, you know? She yelled out at me, ‘Ogogo GOAL!’ right in my face. A granny!” I said the only thing that came to mind, which admittedly was not the most tactful of responses, with, “Welcome to football, Louis. You're a winner! And everyone wants you to know it.” He just nodded, and I knew he was still shook. “Why don’t you join me for the morning, I’m cutting the greens. But you can just walk along with me. It might be good to clear your head. Or you can head into Wayne in the pro shop and say I said to give you a set of clubs. Whack a few balls around the course. I’m sure Mr. Laws wouldn’t mind.” “Right,” he said. “I will.” He took a big drink from his tea, and I could see it settle him just that bit more. “I’ll go hit a few balls. Thanks, boss. You always know what to do.” And with that, I’d managed our first player crisis. Tunbridge Wells were, again, all systems Ogogo.
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Jan 19, 2021 21:23
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Mrenda posted:all systems Ogogo. Admit it, this whole update was so you could make that pun
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Jan 19, 2021 21:27
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Rarity posted:Admit it, this whole update was so you could make that pun It was not. When a writer laying the groundwork and the wonder of a great spreadsheet game combine magic can happen. I just saw my opportunity and took it. In general, though, I’m trying to put in the idea of stress being something people have to deal with in all walks of life, but through the lens of a football team.
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Jan 20, 2021 00:31
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and just like that, Louis Ogogo became my favorite footballer.
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Jan 20, 2021 00:50
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*rushes into the thread out of breath" has anyone said ogogowns yet?
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Jan 20, 2021 05:37
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Up the wells, the boys carried it well. Should get that granny on to carry Ogogo's position if he's not fit for it. tithin fucked around with this message at 12:35 on Jan 20, 2021 |
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Jan 20, 2021 12:33
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The Trials Of Trialists Our win against Beckenham Town had placed us right in the middle of the league. With four games played you could say we were distinctly average if it wasn’t for the manner we’d achieved our two wins in. For us it was a case of hot and cold, switched on or off, and it was my job to ensure the team stayed firmly in the ‘switched on’ mode; even if it meant bringing in a few new faces.  Our position in the league after four games played. Our difficult start showed no let up and with some games played it meant I could begin looking at results to gauge a team’s ability rather than relying on the media’s prediction. This seemed like a more reliable course of action, especially with Balham—our next opponents—having three wins from four despite the media predicting them to be bottom of the league.  Balham's odds didn't seem justified with four games played and them in fifth. Still, I had a bit more in my arsenal than the previous weeks with a scout signed. The first thing I had to do was set them on a plan to watch whatever opponent we had coming up. I asked Callum Batt to pour over video, even to travel, and get a view on whoever it was we were facing next. I just didn’t know if he could manage it for Balham having just come in with us. Part of the scouting could, eventually, inform my decisions. During the first four games we played I didn’t keep notes on how our opposition had set up, tactically—I was too focused on our own performance—but I did recall that Beckenham had played in a 4231 shape, with a heavy emphasis on control around our box. What a scout would mean is, at the least, I’d have some idea of how a team liked to play, and I could begin to see how Tunbridge Wells fared against particular shapes.  Laying down the paperwork to allow our one scout to check out our upcoming opponents. However, even with that info, we didn’t have the squad to adjust our tactics. We were stuck with 442 considering our personnel, even if we signed another two or three players immediately, but with even more potentials coming in on trial, we might, by the middle of the season, have options opened up for us. That made me realise it’d be handy if we had another scout. Performance and statistics analysts were a financial commitment I wasn’t quite ready to make—we didn’t have the spare training sessions to run match reviews even if it would help the team shore up tactical mistakes—but a second scout would mean we could begin to check out the amateur players elsewhere who could be a valuable signing for us. I had to keep in mind that Mr. Laws wanted a top four place, and I was sure his ambitions only began there, so building a bank of players for the future could only be a good move. After staff CV databases were scoured I approached Adam Dyer about becoming the second scout on our books. It was definitely where his talents lay, but he was positioning himself as a coach. I tried to convince him that at the level we were at any job was a good one—and I know that sounds dismissive—but the guy basically told me to gently caress off when I mentioned it. Still, with the limited amount of calls made by a ninth tier manager that get answered, I didn’t mind too much offering him the coaching position he wanted with us. I had already made Steve Chambers an offer in the lead up to the Beckenham match, and was waiting on a decision, but if he turned us down I’d have Dyer as a backup to come in. I thought we’d maybe still take Dyer, another coach mightn’t be a half bad idea, but it was a few days later when my decision to keep our options open with Dyer was justified; Chambers took a job as manager with an under 18s squad closer to him.  Adam Dyer could do a job for us as a scout, but he was adamant he only wanted to coach. With Dyer coming in as a coach I was still looking for our second scout. After another evening on the CV sites I eventually found a lad who was willing to be flexible when it came to what role he’d play. Tony Agnew was even delighted that I’d offered him £35 a week to find players, saying he’d be going to matches no matter what he was doing. He told me had to check things over with his family, with all the travel and evenings away from home, but I felt confident he could come in and do a job for us. That confidence was well placed because it was forty-five minutes later when he phoned me back saying he’d do it. I guess his family felt he needed a hobby.  Tony Agnew who we signed as our second scout. Most interesting to me, or at least what got my hopes up most as the week progressed, was that after bringing in a load of players on trial, all almost as old as me—if not older—finally a guy in our target-signing age bracket asked to come in with us for some training. Charlie Flanagan was 23, just about within The Fat Man’s limits, and he played full back, one of the positions we were weakest at. This was true even with Smith shoring up the middle of our backline. After confirming our willingness Flanagan arrived the next day and put in one session as Alexander met him, then me, and offered an appraisal. “I’m not sure about this Flanagan guy,” he said. “What makes you think that?” I asked. “He could do a lot for us. I genuinely mean that, but he’s not the kind of superstar player we’ve had in with us before.” I thought on some of the players he’d told me were superstars, and none of them were any great shakes. “Has he anything to him?” I asked. “I still can’t tell,” Alexander said. “But he looks a little lost during training. At least at the moment.”  Our first glimpse at Charlie Flanagan didn’t do much to inspire. But looking at any prospects that came our way was what I had to do. My main goal, for at least the next couple of weeks, was to build out the team into a proper squad. A team with depth, where if a player went off the boil they could be threatened with benching, or at least given some rest to get their mojo back. Even more pressing was we needed to get to the point where we could have a full bench, never mind one with full cover. And should we have more injuries? Then we were on a loser. What we needed was options. And the decision on some options was coming up before our next game, with some of the trials I’d initiated coming to an end.  With a hole in his mind when it came to concentrating on the game, and no ability to mark, it meant I couldn’t take on a short-term 32 year old despite being a real find elsewhere in his game. Unfortunately, none of the lads we had in with us showed much of anything. The guys we already had signed up on amateur contracts for the team had no stand out abilities, while the guys training with us on trials were all stand out abilities, and then vast empty spaces of huge gaps in their skills. If we brought them in it’d be a case of playing the team on the ups and downs, hoping to get them into the right places, all the while instructing them to play in a manner that suited their peculiarities perfectly. The problem was if we had a hundred seasons to work it out I don’t think I could have built a tactic that would work with their nuances..  You could make an argument for bringing Geoff Cairns in, he was a little better than what we had, but with three strikers, he wasn’t unbelievably better, and like most of our trialists, he was just that bit too old. In my office, I was just about to see to ending the first round of trials when Maria came at me with a stack of papers. “What’s this?” I asked. “Performance analyst applications,” she said. I just looked at her blankly. I thought I’d decided against analysts. “The first day you were here you said put an ad out for some. These are the responses we’ve had.” She was straight to the point, and I could see on her face the idea of her hard work being wasted would not go down too well. So, I thought, I must have, at some point, felt it was worthwhile. Still, I’d guessed I’d changed my mind. “I don’t think we need one,” I said. “You can dump them, or maybe just file them away.” Maria nodded, looked at me like I’d said the stupidest thing on the planet, then pulled a thick envelope out of the stack. “You might want to look at this one,” she said. Inside was an analysis that broke down the mistakes made in our Beckenham game, where we gained an advantage, and a general appreciation of how our looseness at the back and ability to score placed us against the rest of the league. And it was all from some kid who’d done it in his bedroom.  The young fella was doing everything to get a job with us. “This is impressive,” I said. “He dropped it in himself, on his bike.” And like that I was sold; anyone with a bicycle and this attention to detail must be solid. I phoned him up straight away and offered him the position. I was expecting a young head who’d jump at the chance but he drove a hard bargain. He could put together stats, but that meant he also knew his own worth. In the end I signed Keith Williams for £50 a week, and went from saving money on no analysts, to spending more than I thought I should on some whizz kid.  Keith Williams drove a hard bargain, but I was interested to see what stats packages he could put together for us, especially as he worked so hard to come in. Coming up on Balham I still hadn’t a squad where I could rotate or pick who was in form, and I was looking for any advantage we could get. Then came the bad news. Our scout couldn’t get any information on them, not in his short time with us. Apparently getting to see them play wasn’t something he could do, nor did we send a fourteen year old with a phone camera. I just had to hope we could improve things as time went on. I was wondering if it was all going to be a waste—having two scouts—when the whizz kid said all wasn’t lost. Both him and the Batt worked together with what little they could find and found out Balham played a direct style of game, maybe even more direct than us.  What the new guy, Williams, and our almost as new scout came up with for how Balham would play. At the least this was something to go on. We knew they were shaping up much like us, with only a day to go to the game, but with their three wins from four compared to our two wins, along with their over-perfomance and our under-perfomance it was looking like the Balham game would be a real battle. Two similar tactics coming at each other meant any slight dominance would win out so it was going to be a real test of determination and skill; and we just had Smith as an improvement on our initial squad. I knew the Balham match wouldn’t be the kind of game that won us anything immediately, but it was the kind of trial that, in the long run, could tell the story of our final position.
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Jan 21, 2021 09:10
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Nothing to fear, boss. Smithy has got the defence on lock
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Jan 21, 2021 11:34
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Long Balls for Days Our match against Balham was looking like it was going to be a real battle. They’d won three from four compared to our midline two from four, except they were performing above all expectations while we were that bit below them. I hoped our losses were just a case of the team bedding in, and tactical problems that were, by now, figured out. Swapping Cook and English in their front positions while reducing the amount of work the midfield was expected to do were reasons to latch onto for our last win. I’d also started a few players who looked eager to mark their spot in the team sheet, so, all in all, I wasn’t as worried going into the Balham game as I was in my first few games. It was, of course, all new to me at the start of the season. Maybe more new to me than it even was to some of the players, so there was a chance I'd just bedded down as a manager. I’d never been in charge of a football team, only been back office volunteer staff at a small college’s sports program, so when the players were relying on me it took a few weeks before it finally hit home it really was me in charge. Even more the case was the realisation that even though I was in charge, everything wasn’t my doing. I think I’d finally realised that while I could organise the team as best I could, giving them what I saw as the best chance, it wasn’t eleven versions of me running around the pitch (thank god.) I’d already figured out I could only do my best, but now I was coming to the realisation that even doing my best didn’t mean all the best things would happen to Tunbridge Wells. With that in mind I set to work on what I should do, or more what I shouldn’t do, against Balham. Considering we were going up against a team that were shaping up to play in a very similar way to us I made no changes to the line up. We’d won four nil against what was supposed to be a better team in our last outing, so I didn’t see the point in making changes. The added bonus was that I cancelled our weekend match, a friendly, after someone pencilled it in as a game to play before I’d even been hired. This meant the team were a bit better rested, after a couple of weeks of constant games, even if they still weren’t quite match ready when it came to their sharpness in full game scenarios. As well as not changing the team, I didn’t change anything in our playing instructions, or even our cautious approach. It seemed we did well taking our chances when they were more likely as on, not just trying to magic something out of nothing with dominance.  No changes anywhere with how we played in our 4-0 win over Beckenham. I thought I was going against the grain in choosing to remain with a cautious approach. With our prediction, at least at the very start of the season, to finish in fourth place, and Balham’s prediction for last place I expected the press to be talking about how we needed to go out and attack. Instead, maybe taking into account Balham’s start to the season, the press had them down as favourites despite being away from home.  The press’s prediction on match favourites. I had to see what Alexander made of all this, and instead of heading straight in to give the team talk I waited on his appraisal of how we should shape up. His opinion was much the same as when we played Beckenham, that we needed to park the bus. Considering how we fared in that game I took his advice with a grain of salt. Whether he was right or wrong could only be guessed at, at least without the match played, but I had to give our lads credit for what they pulled off against, “impossible,” odds before.  Alexander was hesitant again, looking for us to put everyone in defence. So with that in mind I headed into the dressing rooms. I ran through my standard rigmarole of, “I have faith in you,” and, “Pick up from where you left off,” but the players were mostly focused on the game they knew was going to be a battle with two very similar approaches in play coming at each other.  There was only a small reaction to my team talk before kick off. After kick off a minute passed before Balham have a throw in our final third. We win the ball and boot it up the pitch where English gets to it first. He holds it up really well, stalling, then as our players get up the pitch he takes it forward to the corner. After some passing play—not quite in the plans—the ball is crossed to Ogogo who fires off a shot. He misses, wide, but his intentions are certainly there from the outset. The fiery play from his start against Beckenham is continuing into this match.  Ogogo continuing how he’d left off and firing off a shot. A kick out straight from the Balham keeper gets past our defensive line. A Balham player heads it on and sprints towards our goal but we get back to crowd him. I’m thinking if he has a shot there’s not much room to get it on target but a Balham player, Sears, is wide open on a rightward diagonal just inside the box. It’s horrific defending, to leave a player space like that, and he bangs it in. I’m thinking it’s the stupidest goal to give away, an unmarked player, when the linesman raises his flag. The reason he had room for the shot was he was offside, but if we let players go like that it won’t be long before they have one that counts.  Balham’s Sears with acres of space in the box for an easy goal, but it’s disallowed for offside. My inkling about the space we’re leaving them is proven right when with eight minutes gone a through ball is put in again, this time to Barry, who has an easy knock-in for Balham’s first. The star of our defence, Smith, left him the space. Seeing how easy it is for them to get balls into our box I tell our line to push further up the pitch. I have to hope it cuts off their free chances in our box, allowing us to put the pressure back on them.  Smith losing his man and allowing Balham’s Barry to bag an easy goal with eight minutes passed. Over the next ten minutes we get a couple of chances. We’re piling up outside their box, with throw-ins, players running on, and nice play on the wings, but we just can’t work the ball towards the goal. When we do get a ball in Balham have so many men back that there’s just no clear chance available for us. All the while this is happening I’m worried that one of Balham’s players will clear the ball a mile down the field and Balham will catch a second on the break. Any other time I’d tell our players to sit back a little and hold against the long ball, but I’ve already seen what they can do when we’re deep at the back. As I’m realising all this I get a perfect example of our problems with Balham putting bodies everywhere when we attack. Toomer receives a great ball wide on the wing, and puts it right into English in the box. English snaps a quick shot, but Balham already have men back; they’re defending like demons, and if we weren’t already behind I’d be certain we’d break them down at some point for the win.  English’s shot gets blocked by Balham’s ferocious defence. We’ve yet another scenario where we’re playing around their box and just can’t break them down. After what seems like five minutes Toomer eventually gets the ball into the box, but his shot is from such a tight angle, with bodies in the way, that the goalkeeper makes the save. I’m now beginning to wonder, if another forty-five minutes of this passes, whether I’ll have to change around our tactic to put someone in as an attacking midfielder, giving us some options in the final third. The problem is a 442, and our players, just don’t provide options for this.  Toomer gets his difficult shot away but it’s saved. It’s from a goal kick that we finally get something. The ball is played out by Diaper to English, who holds it in midfield. Cook makes a run behind the Balham defence and English slides the ball through. For once the Balham defence haven’t had a chance to set themselves with the speed of the play. Cook runs on, and I’m hoping he can make this one break we’ve had count, and he does! He takes a fine shot to the corner of the goal, and we’re drawing one-all.  Cook with a rare quick break for us brings us back to one-all. There’s a lot of shouting and roaring from the Balham bench after the goal. They kick off, and they’re all looking fired up. I’m worried that we’ll switch off, having just got one back and with only six minutes to half time, but the shouting from the Balham staff seems to have had the opposite effect. A Balham player misjudges a header, knocking it down to Ogogo, who puts a first time ball into English who’s completely unmarked in the box. English’s composure holds this time, and he fires the ball straight past the Balham keeper. After a shakey start we’re two-one up.  English scoring after being left completely unmarked in the box. At half time I want to warn the players against complacency. To keep their heads in the game and not to let their guard down, but I’m worried that would only cause them to play with nerves. They must be fully aware, after going down a goal at the beginning of the game, that it can all change very quickly. Instead I tell them they’re doing well, and they all seem to appreciate it. And they should know they’re doing well; despite Balham being difficult to break down, we’re still a goal up.  What my fear wanted me to say at half time versus what I did actually say. Eight minutes into the second half the balance to pushing my defensive line happened. While we kept them from getting balls into our box with their players free, a quick dart behind us meant they might get a free run on goal, and Barry does just that. He gets behind us and punishes us from a long ball over his head while beating out Smith, leading to an easy shot to score. Smith hasn’t played too badly, he’s mostly been solid albeit with one or two mistakes, but my big worry is that he’s already on a yellow. If we go down a player we won’t be able to keep them out, but Smith is the keystone of my defence so I worry about bringing him off. At two all after Barry's goal I just have to hope the team’s form from the first half continues, and we bag another goal or two to secure the three points I really feel we deserve.  Balham’s Barry catching out Smith to run on for an easy shot and goal to make it 2-2. Not even a minute passes and we’re on the attack. A quick ball forward from the kick off is sent back at us, only to be sent right back into our attacking pair already in place. Cook receives the ball, with the keeper shaping up to block his header, but I think he’s going to loft it above him and into the net. Instead Cook sees English get behind his man and plays it down to him, and English has a free shot that he doesn’t miss. Two minutes after Balham make the game a draw we’re back in the lead again.  Cook being entirely unselfish and completely aware played the ball down to English who has an easy tap in for the goal. With twenty five minutes left another long ball is played behind us and I’m thinking I might get the defence to drop back just a little again, to see if we can hold out our lead, presuming Balham don’t score. Despite the long ball over I’m at ease seeing Smith react before Barry, but Barry is playing superbly—maybe the only decent performance on the Balham side—and Barry absolutely skins Smith, gets past him and runs onto the goal. I’m begging for a save from Diaper, but he doesn’t need to make one as Barry hooks the ball wide. Now I’m desperately thinking who we have on the bench, and if any of them are faster than Smith. However, Alexander confirms that in all the sprints Smith performed the best of the squad. It just seems like Barry is an absolute rocket, and so I tell the defence to give up one or two steps backwards.  Barry about to absolutely skin Smith. On seventy five minutes I’m beginning to get worried. The whole team has played well, and I’m hesitant to make changes with them performing, but Toomer is absolutely flogged, and it’s in the full backs, our weak spot, where the players are performing worst. I have no-one to bring on for our full backs, but to give Toomer I break I bring in Duncan Dunk. I just have to hope the team has the stamina and concentration to see out the match.  Bringing on Duncan Dunk for Toomer, who’s flogged. However it seems like Balham have run themselves into the ground. As the last fifteen minutes play out they slow down and don’t seem to catch us on the break any more. With the final minutes ticking away it looks like both teams have settled for the result. And on ninety-five minutes the referee blows his whistle to the appreciation of a very tired looking pitch. We played well, but made a hard graft of it all, especially considering our possession and Barry being the only stand out player for Balham.  How the whole game played out. After the game I didn’t want to cast too much doubt on anything. I was happy to take our win, it was a valuable three points that saw us rise a couple of places in the league, but fullback is turning out to be a real concern. I began to think about a tactical change that could harden us up out wide in defence, but considering the tactic got us a couple of wins I realised I couldn’t change things up again. I began to think back to our trialists, and just had to hope someone would show up pretty soon. Especially as after two home games we were on the road again, and I’d have to see how the players fared in the pit of another team's ground.
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Jan 22, 2021 06:32
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That Barry lad looks tasty, the boys did good to hold out for the result. Up the Wells!
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Jan 22, 2021 08:28
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I appreciate how true to life (i.e. canned and repetitive) news reports and pre match evaluations are. EDIT: Just in case, I mean the ones from the game. I'm digging the LP narrative. Fat Samurai fucked around with this message at 09:00 on Jan 22, 2021 |
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Jan 22, 2021 08:48
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A real tight one this time. Up the Wells!
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Jan 22, 2021 14:10
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From the stat screen you dominated by more than the scoreline. But perhaps you need a special training session to explain to your team that it’s good to score the first goal?
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Jan 22, 2021 15:26
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The rule in FM is that pace dominates lower leagues, but one needs skill in upper leagues. That said, if I were to have seen the match stats without the score, I would have assumed that you absolutely drubbed the bastards. Oh, and by the way, every time he scores you should shout "Ogogoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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Jan 23, 2021 00:08
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Park the bus? Are you sure Alexander isn't Jose Mourinho with a fake moustache?
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Jan 23, 2021 00:09
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I mean, you took so many more shots than them... you just have to work on accuracy and getting 'em all into the goal and you're golden.
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Jan 23, 2021 00:19
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Not to distract from this thread, but while it develops I highly, highly recommend the LP of FM14 on the archives. It's quite long but, at the very least, read the end bit where the LPer retired from club football and just does international. There's a... twist that, if it happened in real life, would have been called one of the biggest surprises in the history of football. My jaw literally dropped when I first read it. Just like watching football in real life, it's so suspenseful if one is invested.
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Jan 23, 2021 03:30
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Rarity posted:That Barry lad looks tasty, the boys did good to hold out for the result. Up the Wells! Might be worth trying to buy him out from his team if he was that good. at the low levels it should be doable without a lot of bitter back and forth
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Jan 23, 2021 06:29
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Superstars Everywhere We were all standing around in the dressing room, after clocking up another win—this time against Balham—when something I didn’t expect happened. Mr Laws strode into the dressing room with a big bottle of champagne, a double size one. I was trying to go over the team performance, letting the lads know they’d really shown they can put together two games in a row, when he set the bottle down in the middle of the floor and told the lads to come gather around.  How the team performed against Balham. I was wondering if there’d be the usual shake-a-magnum-up and spray it around event, but no-one was making a grab for it. Instead The Fat Man made sure everyone calmed down, repeatedly saying, “Just wait... Just wait...” Once everyone settled he launched into a speech about how it was always his dream—ever since he ‘done his knee’—to be involved in the ownership of a football team. This was the usual self-aggrandising I was used to from him, everything was his dream, all his hard work came together, stuff of destiny, etc. etc. But it turned out he was only, as ever, using my lads as a marketing tool. “I’ve been working hard on this,” he said. “And I know you lads get it from the fans when you’re walking around Tunbridge.” I looked at Louis when he said this, thinking of sending him around The Fat Man’s course to unwind, but Ogogo was just staring at his boots. “So what I’ve done is dedicate a private room for all of you in The Sheep’s Head. The top room, in the attic, just converted. You can relax there, if you get me... And it’s all only for you.” A few smiles raised on the mouths of my team, but I didn’t buy it. “Can we use it exclusively for team bonding?” I asked. “Some display boards, tactic sheets, maybe some video sessions?” I knew we didn’t have time for video sessions, but I wanted to press him. “Team bonding, of course,” The Fat Man said, but his tone was entirely dismissive. “And community outreach. Yes, community outreach. A very glamorous room it is. It’s very important we’re a community team. So there’ll be some of the most influential Kent business men and trendsetters with access as well. No boards. Nothing like that. Very glamorous. It’s going to be a place for those who need respite from the... You know? You know... The...” And I knew exactly what he meant. It was a place for my team to get away from the pressures of ninth tier football, while also being on show for The Fat Man’s buddies as his personal pets. “Of course, Louis used the golf course the other day,” I said. “Yes, yes. He did. He did... And there’s a discount on club rental for any Tunbridge Wells player who wants to get a round in. Anyone who scor—” “Yes. A 90% discount on golf bats,” I said. “And two free rounds a week. For starters, goal scorers, and anyone in the squad,” and then I really pushed it, “Or any staff member. Just so it doesn’t feel like we’re playing favourites.” The Fat Man had already begun to slink out the door as I mentioned a 90% discount, and at two free rounds a week all he managed to say was, “We’ll sort it out in the next weeks.” He seemed to catch himself, though, and took a step back into the room saying, “Tonight is the launch of the club. Soft launch anyway. Just to bed everything down.” “The players’ room?” I asked. “Yes. The players’ room, and some, eh, others,” his voice rose and became more commanding when he said, ‘others,’ then he continued like nothing had changed. “And I expect to see you all there. And enjoying yourselves.” However, unlike me, my team were convinced, with them all cheering, and then they made a lunge for what I was sure was a Lidl bottle of champagne, not the Mumm he drank himself. Of course, I skipped his ‘Grand Opening-Soft Launch’ settling instead for a quiet night with a six pack of Imperial Stouts, but when I arrived back to my apartment and checked my computer there was an email waiting for me. Bowers and Pitsea had made on offer on Michael Jones, even though he was out with an injury. And it was a stunning offer, one that left me with only one course of action. They wanted him for the grand sum of £0 with zero clauses, and no add-ons. I immediately refused. It could be worth getting his £180 a week wages off the books, but for no money in the process? They were having a laugh. Waking the next morning the press must have gotten a hold of my rejection, because Maria had forwarded me an article. Bowers and Pitsea manager Ben Reeves had leaked the info, saying the deal wasn’t happening, but I knew it was just trying to put pressure on me and unsettle Jones making him demand a release.  The article the Bowers & Pitsea boss leaked trying to upset Michael Jones and pressure me to release him. That did get me thinking. Martyn Barry had single handedly kept Balham in the match against us. He had skill I’d not seen in any of our games, and would be a star for any team he played for. We had three strikers on the books, but if other teams were determined to get Jones, then we might need someone who could come in once his £180 a week were cleared. I got onto our chief scout, and told him to follow around Balham and Barry for three or so matches, just to get an idea of what he was like, and whether his performance was a blip. I already knew he could slot goals from anywhere, and he had a bit of pace, but what was the rest of his game like.  Telling my scouts to get eyes on Balham’s Martyn Barry. It wasn’t long after sending a text to Callum Batt that he was back onto me. I picked up after a few rings, luckily hearing it while I refilled the petrol on the mower. “Boss, I’m not one to question your wisdom, but there is something I do already know about that guy Barry.” “Go on,” I said. “Injury history is it?” “No, nothing like that. It’s his wages. It only took a few calls but he’s earning a fair old wedge.” I explained my plan, how if Jones was taken off us we might have room for Barry; £200 or so out meant I could stretch to spending £200 on a player who can get two goals from nothing, when Callum put a dent on my scheming. “Barry’s on £350 a week,” he said. “You’re joking!” “No. Confirmed. Tied down until next summer. £350 a week. They’d probably want a sizeable chunk of cash to get him, and then Barry’d want an increase in his wages to move.”  Barry earning a fair old wage already, and would want even more to come to us, never mind the transfer fee. “That’s a bit of a gut punch,” I said. “I just thought you’d want to know. I can still scout him, but I want you to have all the info first.” I knew Barry was pretty much beyond us at that point, but I still liked a lot of what I saw from him. What it meant was that if I signed him I’d pretty much be unable to bring anyone else in, even assuming Jones was taken off our books. “Leave it for now,” I said. “We’ll see how things shape up over the next few weeks.” “Right, boss,” Callum said. And that was that. I returned to mowing grass and considering how getting goals was our goal, but even if we kept what we had in the team at that moment, any injuries and we were screwed. We definitely needed two full backs with those positions being the poorest performing on the pitch. And, if anyone took an interest in one of our amateur players I needed the ability to offer a proper contract to them to keep the team together. It looked like Barry was beyond us, no matter how good he was. Then it was time to turn my attention to our next game; we were facing Deal, in an away tie. Callum didn’t mention it on the phone, but there was an email waiting for me once I got into the office. Our scouts were still having difficulty putting together reports on formations; there just wasn’t the info available to get a good grasp on teams. I had to hope that as the season progressed we’d be able to build our own bank of data and be able to figure out how our opposition were lining up. The whole scouting and analyst team did put there heads together, though, and managed to at least figure out that Deal were likely to play a Tiki Taka plan. It was ambitious for our level, but from what I remembered that was the system most likely to beat us; maybe they had more info on us than we had on them.  The data the scouting team did manage to put together. In the stats pack there was enough to show we were creating more and scoring more than Deal, which, at the least, was encouraging. I knew I wouldn’t be changing anything going into the game. No-one was going to be rested, there was going to be no tactical changes—except, maybe, pushing our defensive line just a little higher—and the team had to go out and prove that they could be consistent. On the evening before the game I went to the afternoon papers; I was used to seeing us, “Facing the Impossible,” but for once the journalists and bookies gave us a chance. I didn’t know if this was a good omen or not, we’d done well against the odds in our previous games, but it seemed the only thing distancing us from an even shout was the fact we were away from home.  Our odds, for once, had us with a chance. What’s more, Deal had lost the last two of their games. It might mean they were on a slide, or it could mean they’d be looking to set their course straight again and take a three-in-a-row win away from us. Whatever happened, I settled into the evening really anticipating the match, the first time I’d been like that—with real eagerness to see how good we could be—all season. There was only bits and bobs for me to manage before the trip to Deal the day after.  We signed another physio, hopefully stopping our shallow player depth from getting injured. With a final note that we’d secured a second physio, hopefully meaning we’d be better prepared to prevent injuries, so sparse was our backup, I lay down to bed wondering how far we could go if the team performed as I knew they were able.
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Jan 25, 2021 09:09
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3 grand yerr having a laugh
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Jan 25, 2021 10:07
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 Now listen here Jack, you're never going to get into the big leagues unless you get all the way out of bed in the morning. Too many players get up and start playing and they're not even all the way out of bed. How are your team going to get anywhere when they're only half out of bed?
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Jan 25, 2021 10:13
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Glad to see about the physio, players do so love to get injured at the first opportunity.
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Jan 25, 2021 13:58
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With our match against Deal I knew it was time to take a real crack at the league. We’d had some wins under our belt—proper, solid wins—and getting three points in this match, then the next, would surely see those ahead of us make a few mistakes and bring us right into contention. We might not be able to win the division, but we could hover about near the top. Where we were in the league after five games played. I made no changes to the squad facing Deal; hoping to continue our run. I did tell the defensive line to push a little forward, noting the effect it had against Balham, but I had no clue how this would fare against a team that liked to dominate possession, especially as we were away from home. The only other worry was Simon McCormick still couldn’t get his recovery correct and was showing some tiredness. Still, I felt the same starting eleven, with some changes during the game as needed, would see us perform at our best. You can react to circumstances and problems, but keep going when you’re winning.  The team to face Deal. For once the bookies didn’t have us too far behind, and reflecting this Alexander encouraged me to get the team playing with a more positive mindset. I was unsure on this, our cautious approached worked well against what was supposed to be better opposition, but maybe a bit more balance in how we set up was the right course of action. Knowing I had to take some advice in what I did—that I didn’t know everything (or even anything)—I told the lads to do exactly that, play with a bit more balance. Take a few risks when they could, but not be all attack or all defence. I just knew I’d have to be quick to make adjustments depending on how the game played out.  Alexander saying we should push forward a bit faster in our outlook. The players were all focused before the game, still in their own worlds in the lead up, and nothing I said had much effect on them. Then, when the game kicks off we win a throw in with just two minutes gone and Toomer carries the ball on his toes into the box. It rebounds to Ricky Wratten, who fires off a shot, but it hits the outside of the post for a goal kick. I begin to wonder if our full backs will pick themselves up in this game. If they’ll finally have a good showing against however Deal set up. Or whether it’s time to adjust the role they play in the game. I know they’re sitting very wide, and a little deeper, waiting to cross balls in. I’m just not sure how to bring them in as more active, or if doing so would expose us at the back.  Our full back Ricky Wratten getting in a shot. Six minutes pass and I notice Deal are pushing very high up. We manage to play out from the back, with one or two medium balls forward, and it gets out wide. The ball is sent in on a cross to English and Toomer waiting for it where Toomer gets a header on goal. It’s saved, but it’s telling me a lot about the game. Deal are really trying to put us under pressure, and they’re sure to have chances, it’s just a case of who holds out, whether we deal with their press or if they can keep up with their intensity at the front and quick runs back to defend.  Toomer with a header on goal that’s saved. It’s another case of Deal pressing us at the back, but we manage to get past them with a long wide ball. Deal, however, manage well and get players back. They’re playing a 442, just like us, and I’m not sure it’s the best tactic for their control possession play. Still, it’s now up to us to break them down with the ball in their third. We string a few passes together before the ball is sent in to English. I feel he has no hope, the box is crowded, but he pulls the trigger on a great shot and scores. With 13 minutes gone we’re one nil up and I’m wondering if this will bring a reaction from Deal.  English in a packed box, but with a great goal. There’s a long way to go with just 13 minutes played, but we’re 1-0 up. We get another attack, but it comes to nothing but a goal kick for Deal. They send the ball long, knocking it on a second time, and Deal’s Bloom gets behind Smith who totally misses the header clear. Bloom is running on goal, with Rihoy desperately getting back. Bloom fires a shot, but it’s straight into Diaper’s hands. We were lucky with that one. Whatever about Smith’s talents, especially in captaining the backline, he’s still liable to make the odd few mistakes in a game.  After 25 minutes I’m thankful Deal’s Bloom only manages a shot straight to Diaper’s hands. With a play involving everyone on our left wing combining with McCormick in the middle, a ball is sent straight down the centre of the park to English, who has a clear shot on goal. This seems a million times easier than his earlier goal, but he puts it too near the Deal keeper who deals with the shot’s power and parries the ball behind. I was hoping English could strike twice, but it wasn’t to be.  Deal’s keeper deals with English’s powerful shot. Smith wins the ball in the centre circle with a well timed sliding tackle, stopping a quick Deal attack and making up for his earlier mistake. The ball is sent forward to Cook, who lays it back to Ogogo. Ogogo takes a shot from the corner of the box but again one of our strikes hits the post. We’ve had almost all the attacking play so far, and I’m beginning to wonder if I should send the lads forward with a bit more freedom to try to bag a second goal before half time!  Ogogo with a tight shot from the corner of the box, but it hits the post. I send the boys forward in attack, feeling everything is all that bit too tight in the scoreline while there’s space on the pitch. Toomer gets the ball down the right wing, beats his man, and fires a great ball in to our attacking pair. English doesn’t get on it, but Cook has a perfect header just feet from the goal. He’s beaten the keeper, but somehow manages to send the ball over the crossbar when that’s the more difficult thing to do. I don’t know how he’s missed, and I wonder if this will come back to haunt us in the second half.  Cook somehow missing! At half time I tell the lads they’re doing well, but capable of playing even better, and they completely ignore me. The rain has been absolutely pouring down for most of the first half, and the guys are drenched. They must be looking at me, under the cover of the dugout, and thinking, “Lucky fucker!” But we’re winning, even if there’s forty five minutes to play, and they have to dig deep. And with just two minutes played in the second half English curves a ball around the defender to land it right in front of Toomer making a quick forward run. He collects it, and takes it into the box, but hooks the ball wide for a goal kick. I didn’t expect him to get the ball, or make it into the box with a defender on him, but the easiest part was the last kick. He’d managed all the difficult parts and then fluffed the last piece of the puzzle.  Toomer collects a great ball under pressure, but can’t manage to complete it with a goal. There’s the ball ricocheting back and forth, but a final ball from Deal puts their striker, Bloom, through. Smith makes a last ditch sliding tackle, but I already know the Deal attacker has Smith beaten. I’m yelling for our defence to get back but he doesn’t give them a chance. He takes the strike from outside the box, with the ball flying across the goal, past Diaper, and into our net. It’s one all, and it looks like our lads couldn’t handle being told to be more attacking.  Smith with a last ditch tackle to prevent a goal, but he can’t save us. 1-1. I change us back to a more balanced approach and begin to think about substitutions. I take Smith off for Edge, and both McCormick and Ogogo are looking shagged. I’m wondering how much I can wring out of them when after some build up play outside the Deal box the ball is sent back to Jamieson who’s a little deeper. He spots English in a gap in the Deal defence and places a slider into him. English picks it up, and has his third clear chance of the game. Unlike the last time he makes it count with this opportunity, and he’s two from three, with us two one up.  English making his chances count and putting us 2-1 up. A few minutes later I take both Ogogo and McCormick off. I’m left with no choice. The pitch is completely sodden and they’ve run their legs off. I just have to hope the shape of the team maintains itself and we see the game out, but Deal exploit our right wing, with an underperforming Wratten and an exhausted Toomer, sending the ball in for Bloom who fires the ball into the back of the net. It’s two all, or it would be if the linesman didn’t raise his flag. Deal’s Bloom was just offside, according the assistant, and the goal is disallowed. I thought it was tight, but I’ll take it.  Deal get a goal just about disallowed. With just a few minutes left in the game Deal get a corner. I’m praying my players can hold it together, we’ve not practised many set pieces, and they manage to head the ball clear and up the pitch where Cook picks up on it. He takes it a few metres forward, then sees English running ahead. He sends it up to him, and English brings it to the edge of the box for a strike. They lad would absolutely deserve a hat-trick, but it’s not to be.  With a few minutes left English can’t get his hat-trick. There’s a minute left in regular time and Deal play the ball down the wing. Centring it they hold the ball up and I think it’s given us time to get our defence set, until I see Deal’s Barry peel off. The ball is lobbed over to him, and if he hits it first time it’s an easy goal. Instead he centres it to his striker, who has an even easier squared-ball shot, but Edge—who I brought on for Smith—does magnificently in getting his foot in the way. There’s one minute plus injury time left, and I’m just hoping the ref blows this up early.  Edge showing it from the bench with a great last second block. But, I begin to doubt my desire for an early end with a minute of injury time played. We get a quick break on, and not content with scoring two goals English wants to create one as well. The ball is played into him from out wide where he runs almost 25% of the pitch with it as his feet, and there’s two men running on either side of him. Toomer is to the right, but Graham Wratten is clear on his left. English takes the easier, and better, option, laying the ball off to Wratten, and in injury time we go three-one up with Wratten’s first ever goal for us. Surely, now it’s all over.  Wratten with a great run, bagging his first goal for us. And it is all over, despite Deal getting a final attack the ref blows it up. We’ve won three-one, beating out a Deal side that tried very hard. Looking at the stats I’m a little annoyed that it took so long to really wrap things up, but all I can say to the lads is they did really well.  The stats would show we had a far easier time of it than we really did. Sporting Life sum up my reaction, it was an absolute masterclass from English.  Sporting Life’s take on the game And with six games played, we’ve now won more than half. The question is will other teams get wise to us, with the season now in full swing.  Our league stats with six games played.
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Jan 28, 2021 09:23
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It was honestly a very good job from the team as a whole, but English certainly had his day.
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Jan 28, 2021 14:38
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Well you know what they say, football is the English language
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Jan 28, 2021 16:07
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The climb continues, lovely stuff and great writing.
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Jan 28, 2021 19:07
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Up the fuckin' Wells, indeed I have a good feeling about our future
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Jan 29, 2021 00:24
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A great performance to brighten up the miserable weather we've been having
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Jan 29, 2021 21:46
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I'm kinda late on this but gently caress it, teams need chants sung to the obvious tune THROUGH ON GOAL LOUIS OGOGO LEAVES DEFENDERS TRAILING FROM THE GET-GO THROUGH ON GOAL LOUIS OGOGO I DON'T WANNA MISS IT WHEN YOU HIT THAT NET THROUGH ON GOAL LOUIS OGOGO SCORE THE WINNER TONIGHT TitanG fucked around with this message at 19:45 on Feb 9, 2021 |
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Feb 9, 2021 18:31
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loving told you, mates. Give it English, he'll bang 'em in. Best striker I've seen for the club in my life
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Feb 10, 2021 00:19
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Just wait until the fangirls get involved. They'll be like, "OGOGOwO"
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Feb 10, 2021 01:34
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My hometown club is in the 7th layer of the byzantine English system. Jealous?
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Feb 10, 2021 03:04
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Glad to have found another FM let's play. Let's push for the playoffs. Up the Wells!
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Feb 10, 2021 03:39
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 17:13 |
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He'll Ogogo a long way, that lad. Are players in the 9th tier really getting £350 a week? I've watched football at that level and it's good fun but I wouldn't expect any of them to be paid anything. Also, all my life I've been thinking it was Tonbridge. Oops.
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Aug 11, 2021 00:31
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