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My shrimpy youngman
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Jan 23, 2021 23:24
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Those thick, juicy shrimps. 
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Jan 27, 2021 04:24
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This is a good thread. This should get reposted at least once a page:
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Jan 27, 2021 04:27
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DST we got another basket of never ending shrimp, you done having "anapholatic shock" or whatever
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Jan 27, 2021 04:28
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Derpies posted:DST we got another basket of never ending shrimp, you done having "anapholatic shock" or whatever https://youtu.be/QT9BeGNnCqw
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Jan 27, 2021 13:36
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So I got these fried shrimps from a food truck by the docks. This is the way to do shrimps guys, whhhuuooooweeey. I was munching and walking and I walked right on to a shrimp boat and acted like I knew exactly what the gently caress I was doing and suited up in a rain slicker. “Hi bill, hi bob” etc. I surprisingly got everyone’s name right. We sailed out to the high seas and while they were fishin for those shrimps I went for a swim of the starboard, aftish side. Butt naked, and I mean BUTT naked. I stuck my head down in the water to look for some shrimps, and all of a sudden (bad news guys) I got harpooned. It wasn’t even a good shot, it took a chunk out of my bicep. With my best muscle on malfunction these guys had to pull me in in a big fishing net. “Catch or the day huh fellas?” I said and winked extra hard. Nobody laughed. They got the harpoon out of my bicep. Then they said they thought I was a porpoise. Gotta take it easy on these shrimps. I said to them “I know you guys didn’t do it on porpoise”. They says to me “look pal, well give you free shrimps if you just stop telling jokes”. No problem sucker, I was out of jokes anyways. So now I get all these free shrimps but got no shoes to cook them in. I gotta talk to my friend at the fake sushi grass factory (the sushi grass is fake not the factory btw).
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Jan 28, 2021 07:58
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Coincidentally received a text from my friend: They were shelled.
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Jan 28, 2021 08:05
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I thought I’d try this shrimp joint on the east side of town. “East side beast side” is what they say. Waiter comes over and says “would you like to try our shrimp”? So I says to him “no you loving idiot, why would I order just one shrimp?” He went to get his manager, like somebody who can count. “How many shrimp would you like sir?”. This guy makes even less sense. Smartass. I stuffed a 20 in his shirt pocket and stuffed some bread rolls in my coat pockets and took my glass of water out into the street. I was going to find a restaurant where people know how to count.
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Feb 9, 2021 11:50
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Lookin' for a lover Who looks like Danny Glover And he's made out of shrimp in-side. Oooh! I want you I need you My shrimpy beau I want some cocktail sauce won't lie
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Feb 9, 2021 14:12
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We need a new shrimp chef, DST just keeps foaming out of the mouth on the floor and the servers and other chefs are getting tired of dodging him. On the plus side it is fun to throw shrimp into his gaping maw so we might pin him up on the managers door.
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Feb 9, 2021 18:34
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I should probably get a different job
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Feb 9, 2021 19:09
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:I should probably get a different job Gonna get into the shoe game huh? 
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Feb 9, 2021 20:07
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shramps
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Feb 9, 2021 20:13
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https://youtu.be/v2Vq4cKOHHk
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Feb 10, 2021 04:04
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Ugh so I was posting about shrimps on an internet bulletin board (friend at the fake sushi grass factory gave me an AOL cdrom), and I start talkin to this guy who says he knows a different way to cook up some juicy shrimps. Now if you ask me science is bullshit, but this guy had some really down to earth opinions, plus I made him count to 10 on webcam so I knew he wasn’t a noodle brain. Booked my flight and I shows up at his weird elf townhouse or whatever.. and guess what this guy asks me? “Did you bring the derby?” Did I bring the derby, the derby, the loving derby.. “You didn’t say nothin about a derby” and he says “I did right at the end of the counting video”. poo poo, I had packed my bags and was out the door after “10”. So we go out chummin around Germany like the best of pals, lookin to buy a derby off someone, anyone. Finally we find this guy with a derby, he’s not like the roundest dowel in the cabin etc, and we buy his derby off him. He says some poo poo in german which was loving rude but whatever. So finally we’re ready to get some shrimps on the stove, and this guy shows me his technique. He SALTS THE BRIM OF THE HAT. Genius, loving genius. I asked for a napkin because my mouth was watering so hard. He fills this derby to the brim with shrimps and 2 hours later we got mouth watering juicy shrimps, and we throw them back all night with our eyes rolling back in our heads and our feet stomping on the floor, sounds of wet chewing and moans till the sun comes up. As I’m leaving I says to him, “hey sorry about Hitler, I know that poo poo must have been a real bummer for you guys”. He had a mixed look on his face and he said something in German. You could tell he was angry and really hated hitler too. “Donkeyshine to you” I says as I bid him farewell, showing off my flare for culture. You can tell he noticed. What a good trip, whistled all the way to the airport.
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Mar 24, 2021 22:49
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Those shrimp tubes back on my mind
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Mar 24, 2021 22:50
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thinkin about getting a shrimp ring and accompanying cocktail sauce
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Mar 24, 2021 22:56
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numberoneposter posted:thinkin about getting a shrimp ring and accompanying cocktail sauce Hell yeah pimp. Get you those shrimp. Big boss style.
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Mar 24, 2021 22:57
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post pics of u succulently gnoshing those shrimplettes
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Mar 24, 2021 23:03
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Big Beef City posted:post pics of u succulently gnoshing those shrimplettes We took some stills but they were blurred from sucking down those shrimps so fast. 
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Mar 24, 2021 23:15
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it's shrimplicious!
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Mar 24, 2021 23:17
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Mar 25, 2021 00:11
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You guys, just as a side note here, I picked up a really cool book in the airplane bookstore. It’s called “Soulmate, Checkmate” by Dick Bonner. I recommend giving it a read. It’s Dick Bonners first Novel but I see him writing many, many more. It’s so juicy I keep it in a plastic bag when I’m not reading it. It’s not shrimps but it’s like shrimps to me. (metaphor)
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Mar 25, 2021 16:00
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:You guys, just as a side note here, I picked up a really cool book in the airplane bookstore. It’s called “Soulmate, Checkmate” by Dick Bonner. I recommend giving it a read. It’s Dick Bonners first Novel but I see him writing many, many more. It’s so juicy I keep it in a plastic bag when I’m not reading it. It’s not shrimps but it’s like shrimps to me. (metaphor) I would like to know more about author Dick Bonner
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Mar 25, 2021 16:23
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Shrimp are the dogs of the ocean
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Mar 25, 2021 17:20
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do you mean to tell me that shrimp fried this rice?
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Mar 25, 2021 17:26
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Look at these beautiful, massive, delicious shrimps I found, I'm gonna make 'em and eat 'em ALL!
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Mar 25, 2021 17:43
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lookin forward to spot prawn season 
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Mar 25, 2021 18:01
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:I would like to know more about author Dick Bonner He is very, very hard to get to know. Very hard. 
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Mar 25, 2021 18:18
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numberoneposter posted:do you mean to tell me that shrimp fried this rice? Well it wasn’t Dick Bonner! 
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Mar 25, 2021 18:22
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:He is very, very hard to get to know. Very hard. He sounds like a real stand-up guy
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Mar 25, 2021 18:23
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:He sounds like a real stand-up guy I saw him at a book signing and yes, he does stand very tall and erect, and has a very, very firm and penetrating handshake, most definitely. 
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Mar 25, 2021 18:27
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cinnamon toast 
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Mar 25, 2021 18:35
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Bula Vinaka posted:cinnamon toast Ok but it’s not brunch without some shrimps fella. 
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Mar 25, 2021 19:00
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check out the catch of the day   gonna beer batter and deep fry em later today and warsh it down with a fresh quart
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Mar 25, 2021 19:13
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numberoneposter posted:check out the catch of the day You’ve got a lot to learn about the shrimp game. I was like you once, but with the help of some good friends I learned the industry, and now I’ve got a best sel.. wait I am not Dick Bonner lol. 
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Mar 25, 2021 19:26
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BaconCopter posted:This is a good thread. This should get reposted at least once a page: Apparently the guy talking in that video died last year. Godspeed buddy, may you forever ride shrimp in the afterlife.
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Mar 26, 2021 17:40
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I sometimes pronounce shimp like "Shreemp," especially when it's delicious. I'm not sure why i do this.
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Mar 26, 2021 18:25
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https://twitter.com/berdyaboi/status/1130709917554401280?s=21
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Mar 26, 2021 18:48
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Hey guys, not to make this thread all about Dick Bonner, but I just started reading his second novel: “Women Are Beautiful Creatures, But...” So far so good, it’s definitely got that pizazz.
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Apr 21, 2021 12:55
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