Mr Teatime posted:

On the subject of corporate values nonsense, the company I work for produced this masterpiece last year. See how long it takes you to work out what we actually do.

https://youtu.be/I8F7GZnERNU

Blockchain!

Picture 20 filth covered sailors being dragged onto the bridge to be made to watch this so we could be inspired by our corporate vision.

Imagined posted:

It's been scientifically proven that more money DOES equal more happiness UNTIL you get to more than about (the equivalent of) $75,000 USD per year. After that, more money will not generally make you happier if you weren't already. My guess would be that anything less than $75,000/year in most of the US involves some level of compromise or anxiety in terms of wants/needs.* I wouldn't know, but I do know that even at $50,000/year (the most I ever made) in one of the lowest cost-of-living parts of the country, there were still things we had to put off/do without/stress about.

*Yes I know that someone who lives in San Francisco is going to @ me about this, which is why I was careful to say things like "generally" "equivalent" and "most"

McGavin posted:

The dumb poo poo my work does I'm dealing with right now is that the organization did a bit of a re-org and my team got switched to a different manager. The new manager sends out "Good Morning!" emails twice a week and everyone on the team replies, so I get like 30 "Good Morning!" emails to delete per week. Fortunately, everyone on my team hates this and doesn't respond or else it would be even worse.

credburn posted:

I told my boss I'm quitting and he said I'm irreplaceable and I've honestly never in my life felt more... it's maybe the only time an employer has ever shown me an indication of value at all.

Still quitting, but gosh

History Comes Inside! posted:

lol absofuckinglutely not

don’t let fancy autocomplete anywhere near your work because it literally doesn’t know poo poo, it’s just mashing together the top search results for whatever keywords you typed in and if you’re lucky they’ll be mostly accurate and in agreement so it doesn’t go wildly off into the weeds with bullshit

absolute freak behaviour to start treating it as though it’s useful for anything except writing nonsense copy for content mills and generating forum posts designed to make people start scrolling past as fast as they can

Takes No Damage posted:

This is probably fake but I still tweaked my back from cringing so hard:

Salami Surgeon posted:

How do you do this? Because when I tried to get chatgpt to write cover letters, all it would do is regurgitate the job description and my resume together with a whole lotta fluff.

Salami Surgeon posted:

We are asking Vendor A to help us integrate a system from Vender B into our system. We're traveling to Vendor A next week, so we shipped a Vendor B demo system to Vendor A ahead of time. Boss loves to not take inventory of anything. Vendor A sends an email saying some parts are missing. We do have another demo system from Vendor B, but boss ordered that one specifically without the parts that we are currently missing.

Chewbecca posted:

I don't think it's really needed, but it just occurred to me that it could be perceived as lying by omission maybe? I'd be happy to speak to it but idk if I'm meant to highlight it somewhere

deep dish peat moss posted:

The first job I ever had, there was this guy in my training class that for purposes of the story I'll call John Doe. On the first day of training we got a tour of the building. There was a door right next to the training class that the trainer pointed at and said "Never swipe your badge on that door, it's the server room. You can get fired for attempting to open it."

So we get our badges and go about our day. When we're coming back from lunch and passing by the server room door, John Doe looks at me and says "watch this " and slides his badge on the server room door. We chuckle and walk into the training room and before we can even sit down, the security guard comes running into the room, points at him, and yells "ARE YOU JOHN DOE?!! then immediately escorts him out of the building.

Weaponized Autism posted:

They're recruiting replacements for a much lower salary.

Mzuri posted:

We've been in business for over 80 years and don't reuse numbers. And contractors are given temporary 6-digit IDs.

Also a good point about them having a niche. It just seems like such an odd hill to die on.

Cthulu Carl posted:

Use an AI to answer the questions and animate a video. If they can't be bothered to use a real person to conduct the interview, why should you use a real one to perform the interview?

Atopian posted:

Unfortunately it's a largely local, reputation based business.

SkyeAuroline posted:

Just got some info on our productivity tracking software that was being withheld: the threshold for "we start dropping your productivity ratio" is two minutes of inactivity. Bathroom break? Unproductive, ding. Go get some water from the only cooler in the building? Ding. Have an in person meeting or even just ask someone for help? Unless you're using your computer the whole way through, ding. It's even stupider and worse than I thought it was, and management was doing their best to tell us it was ten minutes instead.

I need to get the gently caress out of here. I'm trying, with zero luck for over a year now, but just reinforces it.

TITTIEKISSER69 posted:

BitBasher posted:

If they are left on the counter, yes! They are fine refrigerated, unlike europe/UK

zedprime posted:

Engineering middle manager putting the whole project on blast because someone 10 years ago hard coded an SAP form to use American decimal notation and the English sales department can't send a pack list with German decimal notation to Germany so he posts the Wikipedia page on decimal notation.

He is right and I want a time machine to go back 10 years ago and slap the developer until they understand what user settings and conversion routines are.

Volmarias posted:

Seriously. As someone with ADHD that wasn't diagnosed until well into adulthood, it really sucked to wait what were we talking about again?