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May 16, 2024 15:00
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- wynott dunn
- Aug 9, 2006
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What is to be done?
Who or what can challenge, and stand a chance at beating, the corporate juggernauts dominating the world?
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loving lol that people want some mckinsey dweeb to get in the way of pure forums revolutionary justice
INTRODUCTION
here at Mckinsey consulting we pride ourselves on perspective - offering organisations of all sizes the perspective and judgement they need to improve their core processes and deliver value to customers and shareholders alike. we have completed our assessment of your organisation, "Dead Gay Forums, Inc", and are ready to present our conclusions:
BRIEF
the problem presented to Mckinsey was: fforums are all hosed up and posters are mad as hell. whhy? 
ROOT CAUSE - 5 WHYS
before a solution can be proposed we must undergo a root cause analysis, allowing us to identify why forums all hosed up, with problems all over and everyone all yelling and poo poo. for this we will be using the "5 Whys" method
WHY 1.
much of the yelling is related to specific cases of forums drama, with these falling into several distinct categories such as; anti-trans bigotry, nazism, doxxing, forums raids etc. however mckinsey does not find these to be the root cause as forums drama has very commonly been resolved through moderation without everything getting all hosed up and wild. Conclusion: forums moderation does not appear to be functioning as normal
WHY 2.
the normal process by which forums drama is resolved is presented below:
our root cause analysis finds an ongoing malfunction in this complex regulatory process, detailed below:
furthermore, we have noted an increasing volume of particularly severe cases:
we believe that there is sufficient evidence to show that the mechanism by which forums drama is resolved is now itself an endless dramabomb factory
WHY 3.
why is the "moderation" unit malfunctioning to produce such endless and fullsome waves of ripe and fecund drama? this is a question that Mckinsey co initially struggled to answer, though we believe we have found the likely pathway through an application of BIG DATA. running statistical comparisons against many thousands of independent variables, we identified the value that most strongly correlated (p<.001) with a failure of the moderation unit.
thickness of moderator skin was by far the value most strongly (negatively) associated with failure of moderation. notably, this value worked as a predictor both independently and in aggregate (by mean average of all moderator skin thickness), though crucially an aggregate of all moderator skin thickness was not as predictive as simply taking the lowest thickness of the group i.e. the effectiveness of moderation in a group is limited by the individual moderator with the thinnest skin
further analysis confirmed that moderator skin thickness, both by mean average and by lowest value, have been dropping precipitously over the period for which data are available to Mckinsey co.
WHY 4.
for this we were able to turn to our extensive catalogue of social dynamics studies. at McKinsey we have long understood that skin thickness is associated with values such as:
community
a sense of belonging
giving and receiving good-natured ribbing
shitposting
in our experience precipitous declines in skin thickness, known as “hypersensitisation events”, develop after a traumatic incident causes an individual or group to isolate itself from community socialisation.
WHY 5.
isolation of the particular “hypersensitisation event” is difficult via the dataset made available to McKinsey co, however we have strong evidence to suggest the meltdown over anti-trans bigotry being discovered in FYAD, and the associated panicked closing of QCS are at least strongly related
ROOT CAUSE – CONCLUSION
Mckinsey believes that your forums are all hosed up and your posters are mad as hell BECAUSE of rampant forums drama BECAUSE your moderation unit is malfunctioning BECAUSE moderator skin thickness has dropped BECAUSE of a hypersensitisation event BECAUSE of the discovery of anti-trans bigotry and associated panicked response
Mckinsey has conducted further analysis of the mechanism of moderator unit failure, and can provide an additional report containing critical recommendations for the remediation of deviant processes at your will, and on payment for services rendered to date, totalling US$122,544,897,09 plus tax
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Jun 4, 2021 13:27
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Jun 2, 2021 20:30
