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low key sex master posted:I am a riddle master Harvey Riddlestein I don't do riddles, I eat kids and fiddles.
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Jul 30, 2021 13:28
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:i am the scrunt Hello Scrunt, do you have any crack?
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Jul 30, 2021 13:29
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another day volunteering at the something awful dungeon. everyone keeps asking me if they can gently caress the gelatinous cube. buddy, they wont even let me gently caress it.
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Jul 30, 2021 13:30
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Jul 30, 2021 13:43
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i am the scrunt
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Jul 30, 2021 13:48
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I'm a crab made of bread
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Jul 30, 2021 13:52
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Geemer posted:Dude! Occupado! I'm trying to poop while on the clock here! i move one cell south
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Jul 30, 2021 13:54
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Just poo poo in the gelatinous cube, stupids, that's what it's here for! It's like you haven't read the employee manual when you came here.
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Jul 30, 2021 13:58
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i am the scrunt
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Jul 30, 2021 14:01
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Hey! HEY BUDDY, six feet dude! Back off, I got like 500 mouths and cheap-rear end management only gave me one mask.
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Jul 30, 2021 14:02
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Oh, the gibberer, always gibbering their nonsense. Ignore him
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Jul 30, 2021 14:05
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hi i just follow u around rattling my chains youll never see me tho rattle rattle rattle
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Jul 30, 2021 14:10
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Jul 30, 2021 14:15
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Some of you skeltons need to stop hiding the the barrels all day. What the hell do you even do in there, sleep? The Master of the dungeon ain't paying you to slack off on the job ok
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Jul 30, 2021 14:15
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Somebody wasn't here for the Rolling Adventurer of Githwain last month
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Jul 30, 2021 14:18
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I know some people view this as a career, but for me? It's just a job. My dad was a skeleton, too, and he got stuck for 10,000 years in a "career". You know what happened? The necromancer that animated him got decapitated and Dad was out of a job. He had a wife and 4 kids to feed and he was out on his bony rear end. Not me, I've got bigger dreams that don't revolve around swinging my sword, which I had to purchase by the way, at some meaty adventurer.
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Jul 30, 2021 14:30
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Guys, we have to talk about Scrunts. I have nothing against them, heck some of my best friends are Scrunts, but do they really have to live in this dungeon? Have you considered the loss in property value? Also, what's up with those Tiraphegs and their battle cry? 'Please kiilll meeee', is just not right.
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Jul 30, 2021 14:37
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Scrunts are literally exclusive to the SA dungeons. And though they stink, babble, poo poo and piss everywhere and everyone hates them, they're part of the SA brand that we all love.
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Jul 30, 2021 14:39
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Oh me? Yeah, I don't know why I'm down here. I'm just a regular work-a-day guy. Anyways I'd love to chat more but I've got to finish scrubbing out this cast iron pan with steel wool. If you're hungry there are some cold steak sandwiches in the ice room. They're well done with ketchup - just the way I like 'em!
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Jul 30, 2021 14:40
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Oh poo poo here comes the NIMBY talk, first they were afraid of jelly cubes and now this. Get the gently caress out of the den Tarquinn and set your head right! I think the crazy sorcerer from the lava pit has a few spare heads you could use.
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Jul 30, 2021 14:41
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Which floor of the dungeon is HR on? All my fellow mimics are creating a very hostile work environment for me. They claim that a mimic should only ever take the form of a treasure chest, and that my decision to disguise myself as a coat rack is "unnatural". This has to stop!
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Jul 30, 2021 14:44
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Straight down and don't stop until you see the three headed dog
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Jul 30, 2021 14:46
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Give the Doggo some head scratches, we named him Ivan after we got him from the Kremlin.
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Jul 30, 2021 14:50
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Guys, sorry to report that Irene is no longer with us. Her family says she died peacefully in hospice after as some of you know, she contracted ovipositor cancer last July. According to her wishes and traditions of her people, her remnants will be ground to a paste and placed in a flask as a mysterious potion crafting ingredient.
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Jul 30, 2021 15:09
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Tarquinn posted:Guys, we have to talk about Scrunts. I have nothing against them, heck some of my best friends are Scrunts, but do they really have to live in this dungeon? Have you considered the loss in property value? i am the scrunt 
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Jul 30, 2021 15:13
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Lucky Guy posted:Which floor of the dungeon is HR on? All my fellow mimics are creating a very hostile work environment for me. They claim that a mimic should only ever take the form of a treasure chest, and that my decision to disguise myself as a coat rack is "unnatural". This has to stop! Yeah good luck with that. Don't forget that HR is always on the side of the dungeon's owner, not us monsters. I tried to get a raise last year, you know what they told me? My performance was not "Up to par". Up to par of what? I freaking stand in a hallway and stab anyone that comes in, you want me to reinvent the wheel here?
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Jul 30, 2021 15:14
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Jeffrey of Yospos is such a slave driver of a dungeon master Literally. Ive captured several slaves for him and he gave me employee of the month.
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Jul 30, 2021 15:18
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frumpykvetchbot posted:Guys, sorry to report that Irene is no longer with us. Her family says she died peacefully in hospice after as some of you know, she contracted ovipositor cancer last July. According to her wishes and traditions of her people, her remnants will be ground to a paste and placed in a flask as a mysterious potion crafting ingredient. Oh my, only the other week we were having a delightful chat over tea and she said nothing. I don't hold it against her of course, she was always so disgusted with eating goodbyes. And dwarven beards, I always had to remember to remove those from the meat when I had her over for lunch. These halls will sound strangely silent now when I can't anticipate her buzzing and shrieking cries praising the Entogods and asking them for more idiots trying to prove their courage by stumbling in here naked and without a light source. 
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Jul 30, 2021 15:22
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Not to sound like a dick but imo the Barbapapas should leave. Yes they're technically monsters but they're just wrong for the dungeon aesthetic.
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Jul 30, 2021 15:25
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Lowtax as a raid boss was weak against Goldbelly cookies. Who knew?
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Jul 30, 2021 15:27
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Whose bone you gotta suck to get some time off around here?!!
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Jul 30, 2021 15:59
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*scuttles out of crack in the wall* Gurf! Gurf! Gurf! *scuttles back into crack*
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Jul 30, 2021 16:13
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Where's my scrunt. I will find my scrunt
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Jul 30, 2021 16:19
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STABASS posted:*scuttles out of crack in the wall* Ahh children of the endless night, what sweet music they make.
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Jul 30, 2021 16:24
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Stop dumping dead adventurers in the pool of clear, clean water down in room #13. Do you want throat leeches? Because that's how you get throat leeches.
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Jul 30, 2021 16:25
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Someone took yet another one of my flaming skulls. It's a real nuisance having to replace that flaming skull every time someone takes it! Flaming skulls don't just grow on trees, you know; they have to be carefully curated and I'm bustin' my hump here trying to get new ones all the time. Anyway, whoever keeps taking my skulls just please cut that poo poo out and get your own goddamn skull for once
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Jul 30, 2021 16:26
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DICKLORD BONE posted:Where's my scrunt. I will find my scrunt i am the scrunt
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Jul 30, 2021 16:33
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WHO STOLE MY GOD DAMNED HEALTH POTIONS AGAIN? I keep them in the chest outside The Annihilator of Trogle's quarters, but someone always picks the lock and steals my poo poo... I'll kill bob if it's him. Annihilator or not I'll envelop him in my jelly mass until he's dissolved.
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Jul 30, 2021 16:34
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The Bramble posted:Casts dick shrivel on u, very carefully That was just a bucket of ice water, I'm not sure how that's going to help anything. I still have way too many dicks! DarkSoulsTantrum posted:I got like 500 mouths
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Jul 30, 2021 16:35
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Cloner of the Elks posted:Someone took yet another one of my flaming skulls. It's a real nuisance having to replace that flaming skull every time someone takes it! Flaming skulls don't just grow on trees, you know; they have to be carefully curated and I'm bustin' my hump here trying to get new ones all the time. Those skulls are a massive fire hazard. If The Fire Marshal wasn't so goddamn chaotic evil you'd be in trouble
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Jul 30, 2021 16:36
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