Balldo is a CIA PSYOP (NWS)

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Balldo is a CIA PSYOP (NWS)

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

Flipping up the robes of every masonic leader and skull & bones honcho... my god... balldos, balldos, as far as the eye can see....

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Aug 7, 2021 16:56

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# ? May 8, 2024 04:58

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

cornering you at a party, I insist on showing you a 240 slide powerpoint on my phone demonstrating that ONE of the Lee Harvey Oswald dupes clearly had an earth-shattering ballgasm on November 22nd 1963... the SAME kind of earth-shattering ballgasm that facial analysis of Jack Ruby shows plain as day on THREE SEPARATE OCCASIONS from 1959 to 1963... what kind of device could possibly facilitate such an earth-shattering ballgasm, you might ask? Well, I'll let you connect the dots yourself, but let's just say, even LBJ's office bathroom held a FEW secrets

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Aug 7, 2021 17:00

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

corkboard connecting with red yarn Jack Smith, Operation Paperclip, and Wilhelm Reich, me gesticulating wildly and shouting "BIOPOWER IS STORED IN THE BALLS! WHO HARNESSES THE POWER?? 50.4% OF THE WORLD HAVE THE GUNS, BUT WHO'S PULLING THE TRIGGER???" as I am banned from alt.music.belleandsebastian for the fourth and final time. "I'm sorry it turned out this way," types user "mod_with_the_arab_strap," "but we've got to get you away from here. You're dyin'." He smiles and turns from the computer towards his wife. He's ready for a ballgasm. It's going to be earth-shattering... and it's the free people of the world who will pay the price.

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Aug 7, 2021 17:05

take the moon: by sebmojo

listen youre my top agent. youve started more wars than helen of troy. youve saved more terror attacks than captain america and when u did terror attacks urself they were nice and far away in another country

but when we get the white van from you it's always uh, whiter than it was when you got it

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Aug 7, 2021 19:09

take the moon: by sebmojo

CIA Op chief reading garfield in his office when suddenly the room starts shaking. klaxons blare. the phone goes off and he picks it up

no its just one of my mine, another earth-shatterer. *leans out door* can you guys cut that poo poo out

# ? Aug 7, 2021 19:11

google THIS

"Where's the ballgasm?"

# ? Aug 8, 2021 00:17

Escape From Noise

How Wonderful! posted:

cornering you at a party, I insist on showing you a 240 slide powerpoint on my phone demonstrating that ONE of the Lee Harvey Oswald dupes clearly had an earth-shattering ballgasm on November 22nd 1963... the SAME kind of earth-shattering ballgasm that facial analysis of Jack Ruby shows plain as day on THREE SEPARATE OCCASIONS from 1959 to 1963... what kind of device could possibly facilitate such an earth-shattering ballgasm, you might ask? Well, I'll let you connect the dots yourself, but let's just say, even LBJ's office bathroom held a FEW secrets

# ? Aug 8, 2021 01:00

Escape From Noise

How Wonderful! posted:

corkboard connecting with red yarn Jack Smith, Operation Paperclip, and Wilhelm Reich, me gesticulating wildly and shouting "BIOPOWER IS STORED IN THE BALLS! WHO HARNESSES THE POWER?? 50.4% OF THE WORLD HAVE THE GUNS, BUT WHO'S PULLING THE TRIGGER???" as I am banned from alt.music.belleandsebastian for the fourth and final time. "I'm sorry it turned out this way," types user "mod_with_the_arab_strap," "but we've got to get you away from here. You're dyin'." He smiles and turns from the computer towards his wife. He's ready for a ballgasm. It's going to be earth-shattering... and it's the free people of the world who will pay the price.

# ? Aug 8, 2021 01:00

Android Blues

How Wonderful! posted:

cornering you at a party, I insist on showing you a 240 slide powerpoint on my phone demonstrating that ONE of the Lee Harvey Oswald dupes clearly had an earth-shattering ballgasm on November 22nd 1963... the SAME kind of earth-shattering ballgasm that facial analysis of Jack Ruby shows plain as day on THREE SEPARATE OCCASIONS from 1959 to 1963... what kind of device could possibly facilitate such an earth-shattering ballgasm, you might ask? Well, I'll let you connect the dots yourself, but let's just say, even LBJ's office bathroom held a FEW secrets

How Wonderful! posted:

corkboard connecting with red yarn Jack Smith, Operation Paperclip, and Wilhelm Reich, me gesticulating wildly and shouting "BIOPOWER IS STORED IN THE BALLS! WHO HARNESSES THE POWER?? 50.4% OF THE WORLD HAVE THE GUNS, BUT WHO'S PULLING THE TRIGGER???" as I am banned from alt.music.belleandsebastian for the fourth and final time. "I'm sorry it turned out this way," types user "mod_with_the_arab_strap," "but we've got to get you away from here. You're dyin'." He smiles and turns from the computer towards his wife. He's ready for a ballgasm. It's going to be earth-shattering... and it's the free people of the world who will pay the price.

take the moon posted:

CIA Op chief reading garfield in his office when suddenly the room starts shaking. klaxons blare. the phone goes off and he picks it up

no its just one of my mine, another earth-shatterer. *leans out door* can you guys cut that poo poo out

im cackling

# ? Aug 8, 2021 01:03

Code Jockey: 69420 basic bytes free

jeffrey please give us a button to automatically emptyquote anything How Wonderful posts tia

# ? Aug 8, 2021 01:09

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

How Wonderful! posted:

corkboard connecting with red yarn Jack Smith, Operation Paperclip, and Wilhelm Reich, me gesticulating wildly and shouting "BIOPOWER IS STORED IN THE BALLS! WHO HARNESSES THE POWER?? 50.4% OF THE WORLD HAVE THE GUNS, BUT WHO'S PULLING THE TRIGGER???" as I am banned from alt.music.belleandsebastian for the fourth and final time. "I'm sorry it turned out this way," types user "mod_with_the_arab_strap," "but we've got to get you away from here. You're dyin'." He smiles and turns from the computer towards his wife. He's ready for a ballgasm. It's going to be earth-shattering... and it's the free people of the world who will pay the price.

# ? Aug 8, 2021 01:47

Escape From Noise

Project Artichoke Deez Nuts later led to Project MKUltra Ballgasms. These experiments were not only unethical but inhumane, leading several subjects to ballgasm to death, some even killed others with their ballgasms. The CIA and the rest of the intelligence community tried to hush it all up, and succeeded for a while, but eventually the documents were partially declassified. Even with redacted information, the horror of these projects is plainly visible.

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Aug 8, 2021 04:37

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

sure everybody humors me until I start asking uncomfortable questions about how many earth-shattering ballgasms it would take to shatter the earth beneath, say... the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building? And why furloughed US military men in unmarked helicopters were stationed in Oklahoma City "beta testing" unconventional, unsanctioned new pleasure contraptions in the spring of 1995? Maybe "Mr. President" Bill Clinton would care to chime in on these earth-shattering ballgasm "inconsistencies"... but heh... I'm not holding my breath.

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Aug 8, 2021 04:50

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

We rendezvous on a bench... inconspicuous. I avoid eye contact as I slide a plain manila envelope into your hand, cough into my hand. Rough cuticles, chewed. It's a stressful game. Hours later you shake out a series of grainy polaroids... a crash in the desert, bizarre wreckage inside a military cordon... signs of seismic activities registered for miles around, attributed to anomalous "earthquakes." A man-like creature, rubbery skin, eerie black eyes... its head is too big, its fingers too long... and something... something inscrutable around the groin? Something... too much?

And then, your breath catches. Photo after photo of grisly human testing. Fingers squashed into a strange harness, noses squashed into a strange harness, distressed and visibly terrified men in drab uniforms attempting to have their very chins forced into the peculiar rig. And then, there it is... a second penis? No. Not quite... not quite.... but the sad irony is, who will ever believe you?

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Aug 8, 2021 04:55

Escape From Noise

How Wonderful! posted:

We rendezvous on a bench... inconspicuous. I avoid eye contact as I slide a plain manila envelope into your hand, cough into my hand. Rough cuticles, chewed. It's a stressful game. Hours later you shake out a series of grainy polaroids... a crash in the desert, bizarre wreckage inside a military cordon... signs of seismic activities registered for miles around, attributed to anomalous "earthquakes." A man-like creature, rubbery skin, eerie black eyes... its head is too big, its fingers too long... and something... something inscrutable around the groin? Something... too much?

And then, your breath catches. Photo after photo of grisly human testing. Fingers squashed into a strange harness, noses squashed into a strange harness, distressed and visibly terrified men in drab uniforms attempting to have their very chins forced into the peculiar rig. And then, there it is... a second penis? No. Not quite... not quite.... but the sad irony is, who will ever believe you?

Holy lol

# ? Aug 8, 2021 04:59

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

His nuts escaping, through this hole that is gaping
This butt is mine for the taking
Make me king, as we move toward a gently caress World Order
A normal nut is borin', but ballgasm's close to post mortem
It only grows harder, only grows hotter
He blows, it's all over, these rings is tight on him

# ? Aug 8, 2021 06:12

Code Jockey: 69420 basic bytes free

balldo in 2025 becomes so profitable that they secure the naming rights to the Grand Canyon, renaming it the Ballchasm

# ? Aug 8, 2021 06:57

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Balldo is just a CIA psyop to normalize DP so the government can gently caress you coming and going pass it on

# ? Aug 8, 2021 07:06

cruft

What we didn't realize at the time was that balldo actually was part of a CIA psyop. In hindsight, it was masterfully timed. First came the introduction of the double-ended butt plug dildo. Only years later would the balldo be introduced.

Hell Comes to Frogtown didn't seem like anything more than a goofy sci-fi movie at the time.

# ? Aug 8, 2021 14:57

Ventral EggSac

How Wonderful! posted:

corkboard connecting with red yarn Jack Smith, Operation Paperclip, and Wilhelm Reich, me gesticulating wildly and shouting "BIOPOWER IS STORED IN THE BALLS! WHO HARNESSES THE POWER?? 50.4% OF THE WORLD HAVE THE GUNS, BUT WHO'S PULLING THE TRIGGER???" as I am banned from alt.music.belleandsebastian for the fourth and final time. "I'm sorry it turned out this way," types user "mod_with_the_arab_strap," "but we've got to get you away from here. You're dyin'." He smiles and turns from the computer towards his wife. He's ready for a ballgasm. It's going to be earth-shattering... and it's the free people of the world who will pay the price.

# ? Aug 9, 2021 13:35

Ventral EggSac

Grainy footage of a subway station... enhance.... god-damnit it's a balldo...our greatest weapons turned against us ..the man looks up from the scene with a cold calculating stare...holy poo poo it's Jason Bourne

# ? Aug 9, 2021 13:38

Escape From Noise

Men In Balldos

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Aug 18, 2023 20:33

Scaly Haylie

grabbing a cheeky balldos

# ? Aug 18, 2023 20:35

Dumb Sex-Parrot: Absurd Pox Term
Rad Buxom Strep

Retard Ox Bumps
Borax Dumpster

Dares Box Trump

Zil posted:

most or moist?

hey! where the heck is Zil?

thank you Saoshyantx4, Plant MONSTER. and deep dish peat moss for the excellent signature

# ? Aug 18, 2023 21:16

Escape From Noise

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

hey! where the heck is Zil?

Probably balldo'd to death in a ballgasm "accident" for knowing too much.

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Aug 19, 2023 02:49

RavenousScoot

our friends from nadgerz inc are merely foreward thinking for the rapidly coming day when we are all optimized out of our careers, oscillating between our pod homeostasis and the limitless frontier of vr with only one thing on our mind: ballsex

when you take an assessment of your augmented hippocampus the main star of the show emblazened and roaring in incandescent light is the moment you first felt the tingle of a Viballdo

THANK YOU NESAM :^))
Previous:

code:

https://i.imgur.com/1rh8sdW.mp4 - manifisto
https://i.imgur.com/DeyYjwj.mp4 - vanisher

# ? Sep 1, 2023 03:01

Zoya: echoes of a distant past,
bodies die but voices last.
once were held within a cell,
your mind is where these voices dwell.

the ballsex revolution is here :balldo:

thank you snuff melange for the beautiful winter siggy~!

# ? Sep 1, 2023 05:22

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

I thought we had an earthquake but someone just ballgasmed a couple blocks over

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Sep 1, 2023 05:30

Zoya: echoes of a distant past,
bodies die but voices last.
once were held within a cell,
your mind is where these voices dwell.

your friend sk posted:

I thought we had an earthquake but someone just ballgasmed a couple blocks over

a ballquaking ballgasm so powerful and so vast that it rent the earth in twain

thank you snuff melange for the beautiful winter siggy~!

# ? Sep 1, 2023 06:45

google THIS

Now I am become ballgasm, shaker of worlds

# ? Sep 1, 2023 23:04

Scaly Haylie

how about you balldon't

# ? Sep 1, 2023 23:44

RavenousScoot

ballin for do'

THANK YOU NESAM :^))
Previous:

code:

https://i.imgur.com/1rh8sdW.mp4 - manifisto
https://i.imgur.com/DeyYjwj.mp4 - vanisher

# ? Sep 2, 2023 01:26

Code Jockey: 69420 basic bytes free

Scaly Haylie posted:

how about you balldon't

free your mind

as for the rest,

# ? Sep 2, 2023 01:39

Scaly Haylie

mr balldo's castle

# ? Sep 2, 2023 01:44

Scaly Haylie

balldo's gate iii

# ? Sep 3, 2023 06:46

Escape From Noise

Scaly Haylie posted:

balldo's gate iii

Woah. Passed through the first two gates?

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Sep 3, 2023 06:59

Code Jockey: 69420 basic bytes free

Scaly Haylie posted:

balldo's gate iii

not for me, it makes my hardware overheat

# ? Sep 3, 2023 07:07

Finger Prince

Scaly Haylie posted:

balldo's gate iii

Stay awhile, pissin'

# ? Sep 3, 2023 16:04

Zoya: echoes of a distant past,
bodies die but voices last.
once were held within a cell,
your mind is where these voices dwell.

you must gather your balldo before venturing forth

thank you snuff melange for the beautiful winter siggy~!

# ? Sep 3, 2023 17:30

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# ? May 8, 2024 04:58

google THIS

Scaly Haylie posted:

how about you balldon't

Balldo, or balldo not. There is no balltry

# ? Sep 4, 2023 04:23

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