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Mormon Nailer posted:Wait am I the only person in here who has ever hosed I have also done loving many times very successfully my favorite part is when you do that thing with your genital that people are supposed to do while having a successful and correct intercourse session that's the best |
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Aug 6, 2021 23:55
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 11:57 |
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Mormon Nailer posted:Intercourse? Why the gently caress were you in Pennsylvania??? for the Intercourse! I thought that's what it was! You drive through town, you go through that one tunnel, and boom, you become a Man! |
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Aug 7, 2021 01:21
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Mormon Nailer posted:Oh. Uhhh, so, that would never work for me, because I'm not nor have I ever been a man, and I really really don't want to be one. I'm beginning to wonder if I've ever been one either after this discussion but being a man is not a prerequisite for loving, as I am loving right now regardless of that status loving posting, which is the type of loving I do best |
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Aug 7, 2021 01:34
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I ignored the warning I tried keeping up with the watch my funeral is on Sunday at gently caress o'clock |
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Aug 7, 2021 20:08
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Zil posted:Will there be loving and no-loving seating? yes, but the large gold-foil-covered clock on the wall hanging over my exhausted, dessicated corpse will make it clear which one you should sit in, as dictated by the time |
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Aug 7, 2021 22:08
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wearing this watch on my left wrist and my limited edition Beastie Boys IT'S TIME TO GET ILL watch on my right wrist and every moment of every day wondering which path I will pursue |
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Aug 11, 2021 07:42
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Escape From Noise posted:Like sands though the hourglass, so are the fucks of our lives. pnac attack posted:i hosed so hard, and came so far |
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Aug 12, 2021 17:47
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*taps watch face* drat thing's broken. Guess I'm loving twice a day |
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Aug 12, 2021 17:48
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an antiques dealer receives a package from a recent estate sale, and begins to pull random things out of the box - old plates, some humorous cartoon character coffee mugs, the usual at the bottom is a small, dusty old box. the dealer opens it, and gazes with wonder at what he sees. the brilliant gold of the face, the elegance of the lettering the next day he puts the watch in his special items display case, and by the end of the day, his store is packed with customers but this does not bring him joy, instead he has locked himself in his office, sobbing they aren't buying they are loving and they won't stop loving because in this little antiques shop, according to one new arrival from an otherwise normal collection of someone's things, it is time to gently caress. *cue Twilight Zone end theme* |
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Aug 12, 2021 18:50
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GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:I don't care about the rules, im'a gently caress anyway for what it's worth I think much better of you than this, you aren't a gently caress in my book 
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Aug 12, 2021 23:27
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yawning, I stretch and push the snooze button on my alarm clock, which is displaying F U C K on its red 8 segment LCD display as smooth jazz plays |
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Aug 15, 2021 15:04
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*buys an automatic watch winder from Hims* |
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Aug 16, 2021 04:42
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one two three o'clock, four o'clock gently caress five six seven o'clock, eight o'clock gently caress |
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Aug 17, 2021 06:26
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pnac attack posted:nine ten eleven o'clock, twelve o'clock gently caress |
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Aug 17, 2021 19:13
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I walk into Tracksuits, Etc and ask the gentleman folding a purple velour Fila what he recommends to best coordinate with... this, I say with a devious and - horny? - smirk, pulling the watch out of my breast pocket The entire store falls instantly silent, and the man gasps, his posture unsteady as he braces against Fall 1994's Adidas display, a wave of emotion nearly bringing him to his knees |
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Aug 18, 2021 06:02
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"Check this out, I have this rad watch that can play Donkey Kong," says Pete, the school friend who always has the cool video game and electronic stuff. All our buddies crowd around to watch Mario and Donkey Kong battle on the tiny LCD screen. "Oh yeah? Check out this watch I took from my dad's dresser," I respond, looking around for teachers before shaking my wrist, causing the watch to slide down my arm. "Whoooa it says the F word!" "That's so cool!" Their faces lit up with the glee that unexpected profanity encountered in the world tended to bring out in school age kids. "And check this out," I say, proudly, as I push a small button on the side, "this is the best part." The watch began to quietly play smooth jazz music. In the distance, the recess monitor began to look at the gym teacher in a way she never had before. |
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Aug 18, 2021 06:14
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Drink-Mix Man posted:EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. ITS BIG rear end LATINA TEEN CHASED BY LESBIAN LOVING TREX ON HOVERBOARD THEN gently caress AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, THE TREX. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN VROOMING SOUNDS WHEN I FLOOR IT TOWARD THE BIG BOOTY OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY CAUGHT A BIG rear end LATINA TEEN WHILE ON A HOVERBOARD THEN gently caress. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY COLLEGE CLASS AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN COLLEGE CLASS CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JERKS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE TREX SEX NOISES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY APARTMENT LESS LONELY BY GRUNTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNING. THEN I LIFT |
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Aug 18, 2021 08:48
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my watch is synced up to the atomic gently caress clock all of you loving a few seconds too soon or too late, while I gently caress with atomic precision |
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Aug 19, 2021 00:41
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Zil posted:I don't have time right now, but imagine I typed up a byob version of the birds and bees. the birds and the b-y-o-bs |
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Aug 21, 2021 00:11
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pnac attack posted:it's been 6 pages and i feel less ready for my tinder date than ever have you put on the watch |
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Aug 21, 2021 00:12
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pnac attack posted:no. i'm afraid this is understandable when it's time, you will know that it is time to gently caress |
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Aug 21, 2021 00:54
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showing up to the orgy with a low resolution image of the gently caress watch set as the watch face on my android watch I am shunned the entire evening and spend most of my time at the snack tables |
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Aug 21, 2021 01:23
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my fuckwatch is in military time  its now fuckteen hundred hours |
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Aug 21, 2021 04:24
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the gently caress watch is the band of warriors at castle black that enforces the celibacy policy |
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Aug 22, 2021 05:59
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Mormon Nailer posted:No ticket, no gently caress. Tickets are only valid 7 days from point of acquisition. Check your time stamps, it says valid only during time to gently caress. So don't dilly dally. scalping gently caress tickets outside the stadium |
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Aug 22, 2021 18:43
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Displeased Moo Cow posted:the gently caress stadium it's opening day at the gently caress stadium i can't wait to see my favorite athletes gently caress |
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Aug 22, 2021 19:18
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Zil posted:Welcome to the Thunderfuck-Dome two men enter two men leave, smiling |
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Aug 22, 2021 19:26
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Mormon Nailer posted:It is not time to gently caress. *points defiantly at watch* 
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Aug 23, 2021 20:56
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Mormon Nailer posted:Wind your watch, you're 48 minutes ahead. That's ridiculous, this is the highest quality fuckwatch money can buy and it has never been incor- *looks at watch face again* Wait a minute, "Time to Fack"? 
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Aug 24, 2021 01:00
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more falafel please posted:i;m gaye oh wow I'm a big fan |
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Aug 25, 2021 07:14
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 11:57 |
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Aug 29, 2021 00:42
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